I cried Saturday morning when I woke up because I thought about how few quiet weekends DH & I have left together to sleep in before baby comes. I swear I'm excited for this child. We also have a LOT going on the rest of the year, so I know the rest of 2016 will be chaotic and fly by.
I woke up for the third night in a row at 3am. I woke up because the dog woke me up, I couldn't go back to sleep because I have a cold and I can't breathe. Start crying because I'm exhausted, makes my nose even more stuffed up. It was a sick cycle of crying and blowing my nose and crying some more.
This may be my most ridiculous one yet. I was putting together I picture book display about voting and elections and came across a picture book called I Could Do That: Esther Morris Gets Women the Vote. I was reading in the back bio about how Esther Morris died 18 years before women got the right to vote for president, and started to cry! This is the second picture book that's made me tear up at work. But at least the first one was about an injured puppy!
I was in tears at 5:30am because my 2yr old woke up at 5 and took forever to fall back asleep...then woke up after 10min...then again 5min later...then just tossed and turned and whined and cried on the floor next to my bed. I've been working really hard to keep him out of our bed in preparation for baby. Finally let him crawl in bed with me at 7:15 before I got up for the day at 7:30...
... I couldn't find the shirt I wanted to wear to work this morning. I didn't even feel that upset, but my face turned bright red and I felt the tears start welling up in my eyes.
Apparently I just don't sleep anymore so when H saw me awake at 4 am I cried to him about my preg-insomnia and that I couldn't handle it anymore. He tried to make it better by saying that we could go to lunch or on a walk during our lunch breaks the next day to cheer me up, but of course I had to cry more and say I was pants shopping during my lunch break because apparently now it's fall and i have zero pants that fit me. Somehow I made it to 27 weeks without wearing pants.
I'm watching One Born Every Minute. Every birth makes me cry. I feel like I'm so much closer to L&D now. It's just so overwhelming and amazing to think about finally seeing him and holding him in my arms.
I started crying on Thursday night because the pizza H and I made was too hot to cut and I was SO HUNGRY. I weeeepppttttt. He valently cut me a piece using scissors.
We were finishing our baby registry yesterday and were walking through the stuffed animals. My husband said we should look for a special stuffed animal just from the two of us. I thought it was such a sweet idea that I lost it and started crying in the middle of the aisle - apparently stuffed animals make me highly emotional
@schlecka I was able to catch some of it while at work last night and almost started crying in a patient room! I'm not even a Cubs fan (Go Tigers!) but I love it when a team like that finally ends up on top!
On Saturday I got my hair colored because I wanted it to be nice for my babyshower this coming up wknd. I asked her for ombre/bayalage since I wanted it to be low maintenance for after baby comes. I have known this hair stylist for years now and I have had her do my hair one other time. Well, she must not have know how to do that type of color or something bc it did not turn out like the picture I gave her. Not even close! Its not totally butchered and its bearable until she fixes it but I cried my entire car ride back home and the entire time I was styling it. My husband was somewhat laughing and I said I cant help it don't make fun of me!
I grabbed a glass off of another in the cabinet. Then I decided I didn't want the glass, I wanted a shorter glass. While putting it back, it slipped breaking the glass. DH thought I was sliding the glasses around not realizing I was putting a glass back. He tried helping while I was grabbing the shorter glass then I yelled at him because I changed my mind yet again by choosing a cup. Still thinking I wanted the short glass, after I said I wanted a cup, he hands it to me and I told him to leave me alone because I can get my own cup. Too much drama over a cup was upsetting so I started bawling because I couldn't believe I was so upset over a cup. DH is still laughing about it.
Yesterday I was waiting all day for my husband to come back home from work so we could stop at Target, and he called on the way and asked if he could just stop at Target by himself and pick up whatever I needed and I got teary eyed because I was looking forward to going all day...yikes.
I know that wouldn't happen if I wasn't pregnant! And he ended up driving back home to pick me up, although Target was on his way home so it would've made sense for him to just go by himself...lol whoops.
I broke down in the middle of Costco tonight because I realized there is absolutely nothing that I can eat with my gallstones. How on earth am I suppose to make it 10 more weeks? Also kind of worried about my depression coming back with trying to deal with this gah and now I'm crying again
I watched ET last night like an idiot. I was sobbing at the end. It's the emotion of the scene but also the feeling of the music. I'm a musician so when I hear really moving music it makes me feel that emotion.
I called my insurance company to fill the Rx for my breast pump and they told me I have one of the very few plans that doesn't cover it. At all. I managed to end the phone call without crying but burst into tears as soon as I hung up. I'm already worried about leaving Baby Girl when my maternity leave ends so this felt like one more thing on the giant list of things I need to worry about before she gets here.
@mudderbear - talk to your OB about your fears regarding your depression - that is something to stay on top of for sure! Maybe you won't need medicine and just some counseling sessions can help?Big hugs to you!
Because DH asked if I could bring his inhaler to work because he's sick and forgot it. I started thinking about any bad thing that could possibly happen to him. Welcome, 3rd trimester hormones?
@Kurtni I definitely wouldn't blame you. Never provoke a pregnant lady who says she has to pee!
I want to say I held it together well the last few days. I've only cried twice - once when we were admitted and moved to a L&D room and once when we got home. I think both times I was alone and quiet enough to process the situation and it was really overwhelming. Also my mom showed up to the hospital (basically invited and completely in panic mood) at the same time I was finally alone in my private room with DH. I maybe be almost 30, but seeing my mom while scared and hurt still made me cry like a little kid!
I couldn't sleep all night and woke up H to yell at him (I'm a horrible person) about my rib pain, overall aches/uncomfortableness from baby, stress re: house renovation, picked other random things to get mad at him about (as you do at 2 am) and he just rubbed my stomach, let me vent, told me i'd be the best mom and soon enough I'd look back on these night time rants and laugh.
I cried because he is the sweetest and then cried again because I'm very mean when I don't get sleep and it's not fair to him.
Laying on the couch last night I started rubbing and talking to my belly. Well this little dude started kicking and rolling around..... And I just couldn't take it. I started bawling. Just knowing he was reacting to my voice. I literally had to tell him "It's ok, these are mommy's happy tears! You just keep kicking away in there! I love it!" More tears. So many tears.
I find myself crying more often than not bc of my step son. He is 7 and his dad and I have been together for 4 years. His mom just started coming around or taking him at all over the past year. He has peanut allergies and terrible seasonal allergies. I do everything for him, i schedule and take him to all of his dr appts, register him for school. Volunteer at his school, help him with his homework. Nurse him back to health when he sick and is his primary contact for school and drs. Over the past 2 months he has completed stopped listening to me. I mean I will literally give him a direction and he will look at me and walk away. Just yesterday he asked me when he is going to his mom's. I am seriously crushed by his behavior and question. I treat him with nothing but love and compassion and he flat out ignores me. I am really at a loss. It brings me to tears just writing this.
... I thought about his first Halloween next year. His little costume, his tiny smile, watching the holiday through his eyes, taking him to my mom's house to trick or treat, starting new traditions. It's too much for this pregnant lady!
H and I made the mistake of riding the tube home instead of getting an uber Friday night after seeing a play. It was filled with drunk people in Halloween costumes (including two vomiting DUMMIES) and one stop before we got home i just LOST IT and could not stop crying. I just felt super pregnant and not in the kind of environment I wanted myself or my bump to be in. Too loud, too crowded and too late for this lady!
Re: Why my pregnant self is crying..
Me: 31 | Husband: 32
Married: September 2014!
TTC #1: January 2016 BFP 5/16/16 Quinn Born 1/27/17
Having a cold really freaking sucks.
DS1 - 03/31/2006
DS2 - 12/31/2008
DS3 - 06/26/2012
DS4 - 08/07/2014
I know that wouldn't happen if I wasn't pregnant! And he ended up driving back home to pick me up, although Target was on his way home so it would've made sense for him to just go by himself...lol whoops.
BFP1 12/24/14 - EDD 09/07/15 (D/C 8w1d)
BFP2 6/12/15 - EDD 2/22/16 (D/C 10w3d)
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Diagnoses and Treatments
PCOS (myo-inositol, excercize)
Indeterminant levels of APS IgM antibodies (baby aspirin)
Sub-septate uterus (hysteroscopic septoplasty 12/18/15)
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BFP3 05/02/16 EDD 01/09/17 DS born 01/05/17
BFP4 01/28/19 EDD 10/?/19 🤞🙏
Im going to shrink all his clothes when I do laundry tomorrow. Oops.
I want to say I held it together well the last few days. I've only cried twice - once when we were admitted and moved to a L&D room and once when we got home. I think both times I was alone and quiet enough to process the situation and it was really overwhelming. Also my mom showed up to the hospital (basically invited and completely in panic mood) at the same time I was finally alone in my private room with DH. I maybe be almost 30, but seeing my mom while scared and hurt still made me cry like a little kid!
I cried because he is the sweetest and then cried again because I'm very mean when I don't get sleep and it's not fair to him.
More tears. So many tears.
He just kept kicking, and I kept crying.....