Also, when you leave the hospital do they give you these kind of basic guidelines for beginners (how often to feed, change, etc)? I know there are a million books, classes, etc, but esp since the hospital is very on top of stuff like making sure you have your post-D/C weight check scheduled, I'd think that they'd give some directions. Like, if they tell you how to care for the damaged cooch or cs incision you didn't have before, they should tell you how to care for the other new thing you leave with?
Yes! They'll tell you and I was always sent home with a bunch of papers telling you how to care for yourself, the baby, what to do if situations, etc.
Tbh, I haven't read the BF thread so this may be in there, but I got a lot of conflicting advice from the medical people in my life after having dd. The lactation consultant said to wake her every two hours to BF (later our ped said not to do that- and she would wake up if she was hungry) so a lot of times we were changing her diaper before because the only way to wake her up was to strip her down.
*Please don't misunderstand as me taking a position one way or another as I have not educated myself on what the 'best' answer is as far as 2 hrs vs self regulated, but if you are doing every two hours, changing them beforehand may help.
Our nurse at prenatal class, who was a retired lactation consultant, said to wake them up every 3 hours because they never had to feed before so they might not know they need to wake up to eat. As much as every BTDT parent cringes at the thought of waking the baby up, my brother suffered from his daughter having her nights and days mixed up, so this would probably help with that too....or at least I think it would
@UponAStar16 they, the nurses, are always checking and helping and answering questions. I know as a FTM I was so lost and having them there you feel like you're in training mode. The funniest thing was asking, how do I burp the baby ? And being shown different ways to get the gas out. They definitely send you home knowing how many poops and pees to look for because they will begin asking you to keep track right away. For all of my babies I've had a notebook/scrapbook/journal that I've jotted down the first 2 weeks of feedings in and tallied up pees and poo changes everyday.
So here is mine. I have only changed boy poop diapers. Does the poop get up into a baby girls vagina? How do you get it out?
Make sure to wipe down? I only have boys haha!
I am TERRIFIED of changing my first girl diaper because I too only have boys. Every time I mention it, someone says just wipe down. Noooooo. I have one, I know that. I am more concerned about what to do in the event of a shitsplosion! I imagine it's everywhere and I don't know how to get it out. Omg, so scared.
I'll be a FTM but my guess is wipe off whatever shit you can and then bath time if it's really bad? Wipes are pretty big compared to the surface area on a newborn so just wiping might suffice, even if it's up their back. You probably had to deal with poop stuck to the boys' testicles (or whatever you called it), so with a girl it'll just be that you need to get it out of the creases.
Speaking of which, what do you call babies' genitals? I know there are different opinions like some use the anatomically correct terms, or slang, but jw opinions on it bc I have no clue since it just seems altogether awkward
You know what I'm kinda scared of doing? Getting my baby in a car seat. I think I might practice with a stuffed animal because yea conceptually it doesn't seem hard but when I look at it, I'm all "but where exactly do they sit? And how do you get their arms in there??"
OH!!! Ladies!!! Talking about poop! You know how the first poop is suppose to be black and tar-ish like sticky? Our nurse said to bring some Vaseline and when they go to put on the first diaper, before that poop happens, slather their butt with Vaseline so it's not such a PIA to wipe off the black poop.
You know what I'm kinda scared of doing? Getting my baby in a car seat. I think I might practice with a stuffed animal because yea conceptually it doesn't seem hard but when I look at it, I'm all "but where exactly do they sit? And how do you get their arms in there??"
It's daunting at first, but I always extend the chest strap first, then put baby in. That way you don't feel like you're breaking little arms.
@UponAStar16 we just call it "boy parts" or "privates" - a little generic or hokey, maybe. DS is 17mos and will point and say "boy parts" during diaper changes, so they do pick up whatever terms you use early on!
@LauraPCOS I really liked the Honest Co wipes for those early sticky poops- they are sort of textured and thicker, so they worked well for that.
Not trying to be condescending or rude, but be careful asking for *parenting* advice from your OB/pedi. They're great for *medical* questions, but a lot of parenting is about style and choice. I've seen some TERRIBLE parenting advice given by OBs/pedis to moms who didn't question it because it was from a medical professional only to have it majorly come back and bite them in the ass later on.
So much this. I never asked my Pedi for parenting advice. Just medical advice- and only parenting if it lead into the medical field.
So here is mine. I have only changed boy poop diapers. Does the poop get up into a baby girls vagina? How do you get it out?
Make sure to wipe down? I only have boys haha!
I am TERRIFIED of changing my first girl diaper because I too only have boys. Every time I mention it, someone says just wipe down. Noooooo. I have one, I know that. I am more concerned about what to do in the event of a shitsplosion! I imagine it's everywhere and I don't know how to get it out. Omg, so scared.
@kelliot09 hahaha I feel you! I think you just have to kind get up in there and make sure you're still just wiping down! And when all else fails- throw her in the sink! My sister only has girls and when she visited us in the hospital with DS1- he had peed and she was like "oh I will change him" and she opened his diaper and was like "ohhh no- I'm good" hahah she didn't know what to do!
How do you know when to change a newborn? Do they cry, or you just do it on a schedule like the early feedings? I'm sure in our class they said something about how many times they need to be changed a day, but I still am not sure how you know when...
@uponastar16 your LO will most likely let you know ASAP. When DS1 was first born he would pee and immediately start screaming. Also- the newborn diapers have a yellow line that turns blue when wet.
But whenever DS1 would cry and he just been feed, the first thing I would do was check his diaper.
*Usually* he was crying because he was wet- I am also not talking about a soaking wet diaper- he would have a tiny little pee in there and start screaming! Sometimes before that line even turned blue!
So here is mine. I have only changed boy poop diapers. Does the poop get up into a baby girls vagina? How do you get it out?
Make sure to wipe down? I only have boys haha!
I am TERRIFIED of changing my first girl diaper because I too only have boys. Every time I mention it, someone says just wipe down. Noooooo. I have one, I know that. I am more concerned about what to do in the event of a shitsplosion! I imagine it's everywhere and I don't know how to get it out. Omg, so scared.
I'll be a FTM but my guess is wipe off whatever shit you can and then bath time if it's really bad? Wipes are pretty big compared to the surface area on a newborn so just wiping might suffice, even if it's up their back. You probably had to deal with poop stuck to the boys' testicles (or whatever you called it), so with a girl it'll just be that you need to get it out of the creases.
Speaking of which, what do you call babies' genitals? I know there are different opinions like some use the anatomically correct terms, or slang, but jw opinions on it bc I have no clue since it just seems altogether awkward
I guess I'm more concerned with it getting inside their vagina. Does that happen? I imagine it does. How the hell do you get that out?? That's what scares me. Like, do I need to suction it out with a booger sucker or what? This is legit my biggest concern.
@kelliott09 the poop doesn't get internal (as far as I've ever seen or heard. I mean, how exactly would you know if it did? I guess in such a case you'd just bathe her.), but it definitely can get in the creases of the labia. You just gently unfold the creases and wipe in between.
@LauraPCOS at work (daycare), we changed diapers every 2 hours, and I can say that 99% of the time the baby was wet at every changing. So every 2 hours is definitely not too often, but you might be able to get away with a little longer as well, just depends on the baby. And @UponAStar16 like PP mentioned, most, if not all newborn diapers have the yellow line that turns blue when they've peed, although like I said, changing every 2 hours was pretty much a guarantee they'd be wet.
yes to what everyone else said, and like @LGW2015 I've never seen it get internal and I've changed zillions of diapers at the baby home. It can get messy for sure but just unfold and wipe down. If you really feel like wipes aren't doing the trick go ahead and bath them.
Sometimes I feel like boys are harder with poo all stuck to their testicles and whatnot.
@annabenanna 1) Our hospital had us fill out paperwork for the birth certificate before we left. It was mailed to us and then we had to go to the Social Security office to get her SS card. 2) Before my emergency c-section, they checked my nails to make sure I wasn't wearing any dark nail polish. I can't remember why though.
@annabenanna our hospital gave us birth certificate paperwork for our first. They also have it available on their website, so with this one, we printed it out and filled in as much as we could and put it in our hospital bag.
@annabenanna 1) I believe so! When my friend had her baby in December they made them fill out all of the paperwork then and there.
2) I wouldn't bother because, from my experience being in the hospital for other reasons, the oxygen level monitor that they clip onto your finger doesn't work if you have nail polish on, so they'll have wipe it off if you need to be monitored.
Just wanted to add the lactation nurse at my hospital also said to wake the baby every 3 hours if they don't wake to feed on their own, but that also was just in the beginning. After your milk comes in and the baby gets more efficient at eating they'll start adjusting to eating more in a sitting and can go longer between feelings.
@Uponastar16 I'm going to be in the minority here, I'm sure. But, we've always called my son's penis just that. A penis.
My MIL freaked out over that. "He can't go to school calling it a penis!" Umm...that's what it is...? My DH asked her what our nephew (his sister's kid) called it, and MIL laughed and said, "a snake." Oooook.
To @kmvisioli's point, they do catch on and call it what you do. DS references his penis plenty.
@F47 I'm with you on calling it what it is. It only becomes a big deal to the child if you make it a big deal/something to be embarrassed about. It's a body part just like any other.
@annabenanna with DS1 we filled out all the information at the hospital and then were supposed to pick up the birth certificate at town hall- which we still haven't done #badmom! His social security card was mailed to us.
@f47@LGW2015 I try and call body parts their rightful name too. DS1 is obsessed with his penis and likes to ask who has a penis and likes to make sure he washes it in the tub...If I tell him to wash his belly, he will tell me he is going to wash his penis. Funny exchange yesterday in the car:
With my first we were never told to wake the baby to eat and she ended up in the er a few days after we got home because at her first dr appointment she had really low temp and lost too much weight. I'll be waking this time until this one is above birth weight!
When do you start allowing the baby to have a pacifier?
Also going back to poop - but now for us. Some of you have mentioned getting stool softeners for after birth. I've never really had a constipation issue, should I still get stool softeners? I don't want to have massive diarrhea from them either though. What kind do you get?
Tbh, I haven't read the BF thread so this may be in there, but I got a lot of conflicting advice from the medical people in my life after having dd. The lactation consultant said to wake her every two hours to BF (later our ped said not to do that- and she would wake up if she was hungry) so a lot of times we were changing her diaper before because the only way to wake her up was to strip her down.
*Please don't misunderstand as me taking a position one way or another as I have not educated myself on what the 'best' answer is as far as 2 hrs vs self regulated, but if you are doing every two hours, changing them beforehand may help.
I feel like the every two hours advice is until your milk is in and baby has started to gain. Once they're back to birth weight I don't think you have to wake them anymore for feeds
DD1 was born with a cleft palate and aspirated clear fluid at birth (landing her in the NICU), we were instructed to wake every three hours to feed expressed breast milk. When we went to the pediatrician when she was just over a week old he told us we could relax and let her sleep 6 hours at night because she was back to birthweight.
She also was pretty jaundiced and from what I understand bm does not move bilirubin out as fast (girl was a little pumpkin). It was nice for us in the long run because she got on a routine sooner than she might have otherwise. We also did diaper changes and wiped her with a wet wipe as well to wake her. She was a fairly sleepy baby.
I have heard of other scenarios where parents were told to wake babies early on.
@f47 we use "penis" with our son as well. Of course, I did call my breasts "boobs" while we were breastfeeding, so I'm also guilty of not using the proper terminology sometimes.
Also, when you leave the hospital do they give you these kind of basic guidelines for beginners (how often to feed, change, etc)? I know there are a million books, classes, etc, but esp since the hospital is very on top of stuff like making sure you have your post-D/C weight check scheduled, I'd think that they'd give some directions. Like, if they tell you how to care for the damaged cooch or cs incision you didn't have before, they should tell you how to care for the other new thing you leave with?
A lot of it seemed individualized to me me with some general information as well. The nurse went over a checklist with us and we received a carbon copy of both newborn and postpartum care. The nurses also showed us how to care for this or that (umbilical cord) I want to think the list was more of what to look for in an emergency. They also sent us home with a workbook style guide and our pediatrician's office gave us a parenting guide the first visit (she was about 9 days old the first visit). Our pedi's office has a nurse line for after hours staffed by nurses that can be called for minor things.
I had an episiotomy and as the midwife stitched me up she told me to do a sitz bath in epsom salt and the nurses gave me bottle and dermaplast and told me how to use them. Most of the things I really needed to know those first few days were handled as they came in a matter of fact way (i.e. here is your ibuprofen, vitamin and stool softener--here is the prescription for them as we left).
1.) Do they give you paperwork to fill out for baby's birth cert before you leave the hospital? How soon after do you get it? Or is it mailed to you?
2.) Are you allowed to wear nail polish (gel polish or regular?) when you deliver (either vaginally or C-section)?
I still cannot believe we are having babies NEXT MONTH.
A person from the hospital came and asked us her name, etc. They gave us a printed verification of birth for insurance, etc. Picked up birth cert at local county office. I went ahead and got three copies since first copy was $25 and each add'l was $5 each. (Just in case one got lost, put one in safe dep box, etc.) Soc Sec card was mailed to home. We did a form at hospital as well. Surprisingly easy.
I delivered vaginally and arrived in time to push. I don't know that I was wearing nail polish. I kept my rings on, got my IV in and pushed away.
@laurapcos - I would totally get a stool softener like colace. I'm still taking one nightly before bed after my severe case of hemmrooids. They said they may flare up if I get to actually labor. If you are doing the c-section route, it just helps things ease on out.
How quickly do you use the overnight type of diapers? Do you wait until after the baby is gaining weight properly?
@LauraPCOS I haven't really had any issues either, but I did buy colace to hopefully make that first poop a little less painful! I figured I'd be safe using a stool softener as opposed to a laxative.
@LauraPCOS the car seat... I have used it with toddlers, not newborns... I am scared of that too, I even had a nightmare that included a newborn and a car seat, I won't detail it for you but it went completely wrong....
@LauraPCOS The main reason for the stool softener is that pain medicine tends to cause constipation. If your nether regions are sore from pushing out a baby or if your lower abdomen is sore from having a c-section, you definitely don't want to be dealing with constipation. Trust me.
@f47 we use "penis" with our son as well. Of course, I did call my breasts "boobs" while we were breastfeeding, so I'm also guilty of not using the proper terminology sometimes.
@ignoscemihi I am guilty of this too. DS1 is always screaming boobies!
Yeah, back to the penis (lol), when DS mentions his in passing, I always bring up another body part, just so he knows his penis is no different than anything else. I think people can sometimes feel awkward when their kid says, "This my penis!" and just move on or (worse) tell them to not talk about it.
So, if he says, "This my penis!" I just say, "Yeah, and where's your arm? What about your foot?" And, it's a little game.
@F47 I like that! Especially since you ask him his body parts and not like "you have a penis what does a girl have?" So it's not solely associated with the reproductive systems. Now if I can some how get that to commit to my baby brain memory, I'll use it when my guy starts talking about his penis
@LauraPCOS I'm packing some in my hospital bag, but I won't start taking it until after my c-section. Last time, they gave me stool softener at the same time as my pain meds and then instructed me to buy some more when I filled my prescription on the way home. Your medical providers will let you know if and when you need to take it- I don't think there is any need to worry about it before that.
Okay so yes for the stool softener - when do I start taking it?
After birth generally. Some ladies expressed starting to take it right when you were in early labor, others disagreed. However, my nurses automatically gave it to me as often as they are allowed to. It still took until the last day I was there before I had the urge to poop again. so my advice would be- if they don't automatically offer it, either ask for it or start taking it as soon as you are aware enough to do it.
thanks for everyone's info about BF. I wasn't ever told it was just until birth weight but dd was jaundice and wasn't gaining. Our ped told me that I wasn't helping by feeding her like that because she wasn't getting enough (my milk really never came in) and every time I tried to BF her, it was like she was doing a work out and she was burning more calories then consuming. I started to supplement on a Friday and by Monday her bilirubin levels evened out. So I just figured she was right.
Hopefully this Lo won't have the same issue and I'll be able to use your to birth weight advice.
Re: Stupid Parenting Questions
Speaking of which, what do you call babies' genitals? I know there are different opinions like some use the anatomically correct terms, or slang, but jw opinions on it bc I have no clue since it just seems altogether awkward
Me: 28 DH: 27
@LauraPCOS I really liked the Honest Co wipes for those early sticky poops- they are sort of textured and thicker, so they worked well for that.
So much this. I never asked my Pedi for parenting advice. Just medical advice- and only parenting if it lead into the medical field.
@kelliot09 hahaha I feel you! I think you just have to kind get up in there and make sure you're still just wiping down! And when all else fails- throw her in the sink! My sister only has girls and when she visited us in the hospital with DS1- he had peed and she was like "oh I will change him" and she opened his diaper and was like "ohhh no- I'm good" hahah she didn't know what to do!
@uponastar16 your LO will most likely let you know ASAP. When DS1 was first born he would pee and immediately start screaming. Also- the newborn diapers have a yellow line that turns blue when wet.
But whenever DS1 would cry and he just been feed, the first thing I would do was check his diaper.
*Usually* he was crying because he was wet- I am also not talking about a soaking wet diaper- he would have a tiny little pee in there and start screaming! Sometimes before that line even turned blue!
@LauraPCOS at work (daycare), we changed diapers every 2 hours, and I can say that 99% of the time the baby was wet at every changing. So every 2 hours is definitely not too often, but you might be able to get away with a little longer as well, just depends on the baby. And @UponAStar16 like PP mentioned, most, if not all newborn diapers have the yellow line that turns blue when they've peed, although like I said, changing every 2 hours was pretty much a guarantee they'd be wet.
Sometimes I feel like boys are harder with poo all stuck to their testicles and whatnot.
Stupid Q's:
1.) Do they give you paperwork to fill out for baby's birth cert before you leave the hospital? How soon after do you get it? Or is it mailed to you?
2.) Are you allowed to wear nail polish (gel polish or regular?) when you deliver (either vaginally or C-section)?
I still cannot believe we are having babies NEXT MONTH.
2) Before my emergency c-section, they checked my nails to make sure I wasn't wearing any dark nail polish. I can't remember why though.
2) I wouldn't bother because, from my experience being in the hospital for other reasons, the oxygen level monitor that they clip onto your finger doesn't work if you have nail polish on, so they'll have wipe it off if you need to be monitored.
Just wanted to add the lactation nurse at my hospital also said to wake the baby every 3 hours if they don't wake to feed on their own, but that also was just in the beginning. After your milk comes in and the baby gets more efficient at eating they'll start adjusting to eating more in a sitting and can go longer between feelings.
My MIL freaked out over that. "He can't go to school calling it a penis!" Umm...that's what it is...? My DH asked her what our nephew (his sister's kid) called it, and MIL laughed and said, "a snake." Oooook.
To @kmvisioli's point, they do catch on and call it what you do. DS references his penis plenty.
@f47 @LGW2015 I try and call body parts their rightful name too. DS1 is obsessed with his penis and likes to ask who has a penis and likes to make sure he washes it in the tub...If I tell him to wash his belly, he will tell me he is going to wash his penis. Funny exchange yesterday in the car:
ds1 "mama I saw a skunk in road"
me "you did! Did it run away"
"ds1 "no, it had a tail and a penis"
3 and penis obsessed already.
Also going back to poop - but now for us. Some of you have mentioned getting stool softeners for after birth. I've never really had a constipation issue, should I still get stool softeners? I don't want to have massive diarrhea from them either though. What kind do you get?
She also was pretty jaundiced and from what I understand bm does not move bilirubin out as fast (girl was a little pumpkin). It was nice for us in the long run because she got on a routine sooner than she might have otherwise. We also did diaper changes and wiped her with a wet wipe as well to wake her. She was a fairly sleepy baby.
I have heard of other scenarios where parents were told to wake babies early on.
The nurse went over a checklist with us and we received a carbon copy of both newborn and postpartum care. The nurses also showed us how to care for this or that (umbilical cord) I want to think the list was more of what to look for in an emergency. They also sent us home with a workbook style guide and our pediatrician's office gave us a parenting guide the first visit (she was about 9 days old the first visit). Our pedi's office has a nurse line for after hours staffed by nurses that can be called for minor things.
I had an episiotomy and as the midwife stitched me up she told me to do a sitz bath in epsom salt and the nurses gave me bottle and dermaplast and told me how to use them.
Most of the things I really needed to know those first few days were handled as they came in a matter of fact way (i.e. here is your ibuprofen, vitamin and stool softener--here is the prescription for them as we left).
I delivered vaginally and arrived in time to push. I don't know that I was wearing nail polish. I kept my rings on, got my IV in and pushed away.
How quickly do you use the overnight type of diapers? Do you wait until after the baby is gaining weight properly?
@LauraPCOS the car seat... I have used it with toddlers, not newborns... I am scared of that too, I even had a nightmare that included a newborn and a car seat, I won't detail it for you but it went completely wrong....
So, if he says, "This my penis!" I just say, "Yeah, and where's your arm? What about your foot?" And, it's a little game.
thanks for everyone's info about BF. I wasn't ever told it was just until birth weight but dd was jaundice and wasn't gaining. Our ped told me that I wasn't helping by feeding her like that because she wasn't getting enough (my milk really never came in) and every time I tried to BF her, it was like she was doing a work out and she was burning more calories then consuming. I started to supplement on a Friday and by Monday her bilirubin levels evened out. So I just figured she was right.
Hopefully this Lo won't have the same issue and I'll be able to use your to birth weight advice.