@FLAshley A vasectomy reversal is not weird. At all. It's just not common enough on this board for people to be able to weigh in with specific experiences about it. This group is just a small number of the women in the world who are currently TTC and choose to be members of this specific community. But that certainly does not equal weird. At all. It's just a thing. Life takes you places you never expected. Honestly, you would have to go pretty far to actually be classified as weird. Far.
I'm sorry if you took my suggestion of places that I thought you might be more likely to find people with experience with reversals and success with reversals as being rude. I really just wanted to help you find someone with the specific experience you mentioned. If I hadn't actively wanted to be helpful, I would have just saved myself the time and posted nothing. Like I said, it's not weird, but I also haven't, in four months, seen anyone who is a current regular mention that their partner underwent the procedure. Especially a pregnancy after reversal success story. So I didn't want you to think that the lack of success stories you were going to receive would mean that vasectomy reversals aren't often successful. It certainly wasn't intended as 'go to those places and never come back'. If sounded like you're looking for reversal-specific experiences, and we just don't have it. General TTC experiences and support to give? We've got that in spades.
Stick around, become a community member, and you'll find a lot of support. We all hope that the reversal goes swimmingly (high motility! I love a good pun.) and hope that you're able to get pregnant quickly and easily. Like someone else said, just take care of the things you can control, hope for the best, and it's not worth your energy to stress too much right now. Doctors wouldn't do the reversals if they had a super low success rate and frankly, the vasectomies themselves aren't necessarily 100%. Some celebrity just had a baby and he never even got the reversal.
The path to becoming a parent isn't always the path each of us envisioned. Actually it's rarely the path that any of us envisioned. This is just your path and your path is fine.
Me: 34 DH: 38 Married: June 2011 TTC since Feb 2016 BFP#1: 7/7/16 MMC: 8/16/16 BFP#2: 5/8/17 - CP BFP#3: 6/27/17 EDD: 3/10/18
@flashley Someone we don't know at all coming in and demanding support, without having bothered to support others, is a pet peeve of mine. Don't call us selfish due to the fact that you essentially walked into a "room" of strangers and said "these are my problems and if you don't give me support then you're a terrible community!" There are women here who struggle with so many things and don't even attention whore them around (which they totally could and receive full support because that's how we roll).
Join in, get to know people, do not demand things.
Super late commenting on this but I just wanted to offer some support.
My husband has never had a vasectomy so I can't really weigh in on all that. I have no experiences to offer.
I can understand how stressful this must be for you both not knowing if you'll be able to have it successfully reversed or not. If it can't be successfully reversed there may be some other family building options. You could always discuss options with an RE about possibly doing IVF with sperm gathered from a procedure like a TESE. I know IVF wouldn't be an ideal situation and no one is ever like "I hope I can't get pregnant naturally so I can go do IVF!" but it may be worth looking into if for whatever reason the vasectomy reversal doesn't work out. Just throwing it out there as an option because I know I always feel better about uncertainties in life when I can say "even if the worst case scenario happens and this doesn't work out at all, at least we still have <insert whatever here> as an option!"
Hopefully it all goes to plan and you're able to start TTC soon.
Me: 28 Husband: 31 TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016 Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
@FLAshley Look, here's the deal. If you actually go back and read every reply directed at you, my lovely and intelligent friends were actually VERY kind to you. Despite, as @Schumerator said, the fact that you kind of came in like a wrecking ball demanding support.
Did an argument start in your thread, yes it absolutely did. And for that we have pretty much ALL apologized. But here's the thing, even the people I was arguing with are a genuine part of this community that I will defend no matter what. Especially when someone we don't know comes in here and starts name calling. That is straight up not accepted here.
As PPs have said, many of the women here are going through a tough time. As a matter of fact, many of the women who responded to you (myself included) are going through various serious TTC related struggles right now. Those things do not give anyone the right to be nasty.
Here's the best part. If you stick around and lurk a little more, I promise the women here will forgive you and welcome you into the community with open arms. I hope you do. This is a great support system. It's just that we like people to give back just as much as they take.
I have to agree with @clover28. Stick around. You know how the people you see the most on a daily basis end up being the people who can get on your nerves? That's us. We're a close knit community here, and we argue just like any other close knit community. Granted it's for purely productive reasons. It's SO GOOD your topic actually brought on this discussion because it's something that obviously needed to happen! As PP's have said, we apologize for taking over your thread with the argument. With that being said, so many people come back from a bad first experience and once they join us daily they truly find the support they need! I don't want you to leave this community just yet thinking we're selfish because the ladies here have so much to offer and support! Selfish is the absolute furthest thing any of these ladies are.
@FLAshley Look, here's the deal. If you actually go back and read every reply directed at you, my lovely and intelligent friends were actually VERY kind to you. Despite, as @Schumerator said, the fact that you kind of came in like a wrecking ball demanding support.
@FLAshley Look, here's the deal. If you actually go back and read every reply directed at you, my lovely and intelligent friends were actually VERY kind to you. Despite, as @Schumerator said, the fact that you kind of came in like a wrecking ball demanding support.
Re: Awaiting Vasectomy Reversal
I'm sorry if you took my suggestion of places that I thought you might be more likely to find people with experience with reversals and success with reversals as being rude. I really just wanted to help you find someone with the specific experience you mentioned. If I hadn't actively wanted to be helpful, I would have just saved myself the time and posted nothing. Like I said, it's not weird, but I also haven't, in four months, seen anyone who is a current regular mention that their partner underwent the procedure. Especially a pregnancy after reversal success story. So I didn't want you to think that the lack of success stories you were going to receive would mean that vasectomy reversals aren't often successful. It certainly wasn't intended as 'go to those places and never come back'. If sounded like you're looking for reversal-specific experiences, and we just don't have it. General TTC experiences and support to give? We've got that in spades.
Stick around, become a community member, and you'll find a lot of support. We all hope that the reversal goes swimmingly (high motility! I love a good pun.) and hope that you're able to get pregnant quickly and easily. Like someone else said, just take care of the things you can control, hope for the best, and it's not worth your energy to stress too much right now. Doctors wouldn't do the reversals if they had a super low success rate and frankly, the vasectomies themselves aren't necessarily 100%. Some celebrity just had a baby and he never even got the reversal.
The path to becoming a parent isn't always the path each of us envisioned. Actually it's rarely the path that any of us envisioned. This is just your path and your path is fine.
Married: June 2011
TTC since Feb 2016
BFP#1: 7/7/16 MMC: 8/16/16
BFP#2: 5/8/17 - CP
BFP#3: 6/27/17 EDD: 3/10/18
Join in, get to know people, do not demand things.
ETA: tag
My husband has never had a vasectomy so I can't really weigh in on all that. I have no experiences to offer.
I can understand how stressful this must be for you both not knowing if you'll be able to have it successfully reversed or not. If it can't be successfully reversed there may be some other family building options. You could always discuss options with an RE about possibly doing IVF with sperm gathered from a procedure like a TESE. I know IVF wouldn't be an ideal situation and no one is ever like "I hope I can't get pregnant naturally so I can go do IVF!" but it may be worth looking into if for whatever reason the vasectomy reversal doesn't work out. Just throwing it out there as an option because I know I always feel better about uncertainties in life when I can say "even if the worst case scenario happens and this doesn't work out at all, at least we still have <insert whatever here> as an option!"
Hopefully it all goes to plan and you're able to start TTC soon.
TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016
Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss
Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
Baby #2 due June 12, 2018
Did an argument start in your thread, yes it absolutely did. And for that we have pretty much ALL apologized. But here's the thing, even the people I was arguing with are a genuine part of this community that I will defend no matter what. Especially when someone we don't know comes in here and starts name calling. That is straight up not accepted here.
As PPs have said, many of the women here are going through a tough time. As a matter of fact, many of the women who responded to you (myself included) are going through various serious TTC related struggles right now. Those things do not give anyone the right to be nasty.
Here's the best part. If you stick around and lurk a little more, I promise the women here will forgive you and welcome you into the community with open arms. I hope you do. This is a great support system. It's just that we like people to give back just as much as they take.
Married: November 2015
TTC#1: January 2016
BFP: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16
I'm sorry, I had to.
Married: November 2015
TTC#1: January 2016
BFP: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16