Hey ladies, our LO is 15.5 weeks and she cries when anyone else holds her. I know she doesn't like being with large groups of people and wit lots of noise, so that has something to do with it. When we go out with my family or over his parents house every Sunday there is about 20 people altogether and everyone wants to hold her, but when they do she screams, cries, and wails painful cries. She gets to the point of no return that I won't be able to calm her down. She only gets to that point because I feel like they don't even try to calm her by changing positions and standing and walking around with her (which I mention all the time when others aren't holding her so I don't sound rude). She's also a breast fed baby, but my mother in law really likes giving the grand babies bottles so I try to bring one each Sunday if I can but once she's done she cries and mother in law just tries to shush her sitting down. I hate letting her scream and cry with everyone because a. It hurts my boobs and chest b. I hate hearing her cry I general and it's painful screams where she stops breathing every little bit she's crying so hard and c. Because I don't want her to get to a point where we can't then calm her. DH gets mad that I want to take her back from anyone, which I don't do because I don't want him or anyone else upset. But I want to take her. Im surprised and kind of irritated no one asks if we want her back or just give her back when she gets that bad. We were at a wedding this weekend and she was crying with me and my mother in law said she was glad to see her cry with me because she thought she hated her.
Please tell me I'm not the only one with a baby that cried quite a bit especially with other people. Any advice is appreciated. My husband hates it and gets so mad th at she cries and thinks she's not normal and somethings wrong.
Re: Baby cries with anyone else
Maybe try wearing her in a wrap or carrier so she can still interact with people but feel close with you?
ETA: I find it borderline cruel that adults would see a baby crying that hard and not immediately bring her to mom. You've gotta put a stop to that garbage.
ETA the rest of my post it cut off
I've noticed my little guy also gets upset when he's descended on by too many people at once, or if a new person babytalks in his face right away. If new people remain calm and kind of introduce themselves from afar where he can stare at them first, he's then usually quite happy to be held and babytalked by them. I let people know that it's what he prefers. If they push it, he cries and they have to pass him back. Tough luck.
So. Your little girl sounds normal to me.
my son is a very fussy baby. He has never been a fan of other people holding him and recently he makes it well known much quicker. If they won't give your baby back take him. I get your DH doesn't like that you want her back (only for the reasoning of the baby getting used to others) but there is a line between baby getting used to people and baby is upset. He's going to have to deal with you doing what you need to. I tend to be a push over but with this baby (my third) I finally stand up for myself and it works much easier. I agree with getting a carrier and letting her interact from within it. Or just refuse to hand her off and say "she really prefers to interact with people from afar" or something. Now that my lo is reaching I make it a point to allow him to reach before handing him off. If he doesn't reach for you he doesn't want you. Before he did that he would lean his head towards me if I tried to hand him off and he didn't want it. You have to do what is best for you and baby and if you being the one to hold her all the time the so be it.
Btw your LO sounds normal to me She just knows what she likes and is comfortable with.
Expecting Saulie O 2.12.2016
My 2.5 yr old got overwhelmed easily (still does on occasion) and when she got older, we used the excuse that she had a healthy case of stranger danger. But it helps when people adapt to the baby, not the baby adapting to the people. Now, its gotten better but she has to observe and feel comfortable before she dives right in. And she was breastfed and stayed home so she didn't have a ton of opportunities to interact with new people.