I manage a detox department within a major hospital here and I get that addiction is considered a disease. Heck, my last fiance was addicted to pain killers (hence why i called off wedding) and my SO now is an alcoholic who goes to AA 7x a week, has been to rehab, intensive therapy, you name it. Even though addiction is in my daily life personally and professionally, NO ONE MAKES YOU GRAB A NEEDLE AND STICK IT IN YOUR ARM. No one wakes up addicted to heroin or opiates (besides babies of addicted mothers). I get so annoyed with my patients who do nothing for themselves and yet ride on the coat tails of "but I have a disease".
I manage a detox department within a major hospital here and I get that addiction is considered a disease. Heck, my last fiance was addicted to pain killers (hence why i called off wedding) and my SO now is an alcoholic who goes to AA 7x a week, has been to rehab, intensive therapy, you name it. Even though addiction is in my daily life personally and professionally, NO ONE MAKES YOU GRAB A NEEDLE AND STICK IT IN YOUR ARM. No one wakes up addicted to heroin or opiates (besides babies of addicted mothers). I get so annoyed with my patients who do nothing for themselves and yet ride on the coat tails of "but I have a disease".
I do agree with you there. If you have an addiction, you need to take responsibility for yourself and your health. You need to take responsibility for you actions and the affect they have on others. That's the only way you can recover.
I feel the same way about my depression. It's a disease and I will never live without it, but my actions because of it affect my family and I have to take responsibility for that. I will have days where I fail, but I don't say "I have a disease, cut my some slack." I pick myself up and try again. Someday I may loose that fight, but I'll never win if I don't take responsibility. Having a disease is not a license to use it as a crutch.
I manage a detox department within a major hospital here and I get that addiction is considered a disease. Heck, my last fiance was addicted to pain killers (hence why i called off wedding) and my SO now is an alcoholic who goes to AA 7x a week, has been to rehab, intensive therapy, you name it. Even though addiction is in my daily life personally and professionally, NO ONE MAKES YOU GRAB A NEEDLE AND STICK IT IN YOUR ARM. No one wakes up addicted to heroin or opiates (besides babies of addicted mothers). I get so annoyed with my patients who do nothing for themselves and yet ride on the coat tails of "but I have a disease".
I think to say that they're doing nothing for themselves and riding coat tails is to make an assumption that leaves out details of other factors you may not know about. You don't know how someone's past experiences have affected them. Something that you're able to bounce back from may have been something they're struggling to do. These underlying facts ON TOP OF the actual physical addiction may be what's keeping them from picking themselves up. Of course, picking up that *insert addictive substance* was a choice... but again, you don't know what triggered the start or how an incident in their lives may have affected them. Maybe it was just being young and dumb. Maybe it was much more serious. Either way, something is very likely plaguing that person and drawing them back in. You clearly have a lot of experience here which actually makes me surprised at your outlook on this. Do you feel like that's a common feeling across your department, among clinical staff?
ETA: not to say your opinion is necessarily wrong here... just different from mine.
I manage a detox department within a major hospital here and I get that addiction is considered a disease. Heck, my last fiance was addicted to pain killers (hence why i called off wedding) and my SO now is an alcoholic who goes to AA 7x a week, has been to rehab, intensive therapy, you name it. Even though addiction is in my daily life personally and professionally, NO ONE MAKES YOU GRAB A NEEDLE AND STICK IT IN YOUR ARM. No one wakes up addicted to heroin or opiates (besides babies of addicted mothers). I get so annoyed with my patients who do nothing for themselves and yet ride on the coat tails of "but I have a disease".
I think to say that they're doing nothing for themselves and riding coat tails is to make an assumption that leaves out details of other factors you may not know about. You don't know how someone's past experiences have affected them. Something that you're able to bounce back from may have been something they're struggling to do. These underlying facts ON TOP OF the actual physical addiction may be what's keeping them from picking themselves up. Of course, picking up that *insert addictive substance* was a choice... but again, you don't know what triggered the start or how an incident in their lives may have affected them. Maybe it was just being young and dumb. Maybe it was much more serious. Either way, something is very likely plaguing that person and drawing them back in. You clearly have a lot of experience here which actually makes me surprised at your outlook on this. Do you feel like that's a common feeling across your department, among clinical staff?
ETA: not to say your opinion is necessarily wrong here... just different from mine.
I think you can have sympathy for someone's situation or disease and still hold them accountable if they're not trying to get better. Addiction is hard because yes, there are often SO many other things going on and addicts need people who are understanding of that in their support system. But you can't get better if you run around using your disease as an excuse.
I manage a detox department within a major hospital here and I get that addiction is considered a disease. Heck, my last fiance was addicted to pain killers (hence why i called off wedding) and my SO now is an alcoholic who goes to AA 7x a week, has been to rehab, intensive therapy, you name it. Even though addiction is in my daily life personally and professionally, NO ONE MAKES YOU GRAB A NEEDLE AND STICK IT IN YOUR ARM. No one wakes up addicted to heroin or opiates (besides babies of addicted mothers). I get so annoyed with my patients who do nothing for themselves and yet ride on the coat tails of "but I have a disease".
This is where I can branch off with this topic. I agree that addiction is a disease, and not a crime. After that initial thought, it all boils down to the individuals and their specifics with addiction. I have a friend who has been having heart surgeries since she was 16, she is now addicted to the pain killers she has been given for the passed 15 years of her life after all of the procedures and scopes they do regularly. She sees a pain management specialist, she didn't even realize she was addicted to them until after she had ran out after her last procedure, didn't bother to refill, then began suffering withdrawals. But she never did anybody any wrong trying to get a fix. And I don't place any blame on her for what happened, plus she is trying to get weened off of opiates now. On the flip side, my baby brother is a junkie. He chose that life, refuses to help himself or recieve help, and will rob, cheat, steal, and lie his ass off for his next fix, ride the "addiction is a disease- I'm just sick" thing, and keep doing what he's doing. I DO agree that addiction is a disease. I do believe that addicts are sick. But as with any ailment, if you're sick, GO TO A DOCTOR AND GET TREATED. If you won't do that, I won't sympathize.
I manage a detox department within a major hospital here and I get that addiction is considered a disease. Heck, my last fiance was addicted to pain killers (hence why i called off wedding) and my SO now is an alcoholic who goes to AA 7x a week, has been to rehab, intensive therapy, you name it. Even though addiction is in my daily life personally and professionally, NO ONE MAKES YOU GRAB A NEEDLE AND STICK IT IN YOUR ARM. No one wakes up addicted to heroin or opiates (besides babies of addicted mothers). I get so annoyed with my patients who do nothing for themselves and yet ride on the coat tails of "but I have a disease".
I think to say that they're doing nothing for themselves and riding coat tails is to make an assumption that leaves out details of other factors you may not know about. You don't know how someone's past experiences have affected them. Something that you're able to bounce back from may have been something they're struggling to do. These underlying facts ON TOP OF the actual physical addiction may be what's keeping them from picking themselves up. Of course, picking up that *insert addictive substance* was a choice... but again, you don't know what triggered the start or how an incident in their lives may have affected them. Maybe it was just being young and dumb. Maybe it was much more serious. Either way, something is very likely plaguing that person and drawing them back in. You clearly have a lot of experience here which actually makes me surprised at your outlook on this. Do you feel like that's a common feeling across your department, among clinical staff?
ETA: not to say your opinion is necessarily wrong here... just different from mine.
Not all ride the coat tails of the disease model. But I see constant repeat admissions to our facility. Upon admission and throughout their stay with us we are working on a discharge plan. Insurance dependent, we set them up with further inpatient rehab, IOP, one on one counseling, etc. We do a full bio/ psycho/social background examination-- I know of their PTSD, their rapes, their attempted murder time in prison. But guess what, the only person who can flip their life around is THEMSELVES. I can make all the appointments and follow ups with all sorts of experts, but 9x out of 10 we see people back and their reasoning is " I didn't go to my appointments". @bnsmith85, I completely see your point and it is totally valid--it just baffles me that most of the people I see do nothing to help themselves but constantly say how they want a different life, they are tired of this life, they want to be there for their families.. and yet they get clean and get back out and use whatever chosen substance.
I think the one at fault in the whole gorilla situation is the zoo. Why are people focusing so much on "mother's fault" vs "they shouldn't have shot the gorilla"? There should never ever ever be the possibility that my dumbass kid (because seriously, all toddlers are stupid relatively speaking) could GET INSIDE A ZOO HABITAT.
I manage a detox department within a major hospital here and I get that addiction is considered a disease. Heck, my last fiance was addicted to pain killers (hence why i called off wedding) and my SO now is an alcoholic who goes to AA 7x a week, has been to rehab, intensive therapy, you name it. Even though addiction is in my daily life personally and professionally, NO ONE MAKES YOU GRAB A NEEDLE AND STICK IT IN YOUR ARM. No one wakes up addicted to heroin or opiates (besides babies of addicted mothers). I get so annoyed with my patients who do nothing for themselves and yet ride on the coat tails of "but I have a disease".
I think to say that they're doing nothing for themselves and riding coat tails is to make an assumption that leaves out details of other factors you may not know about. You don't know how someone's past experiences have affected them. Something that you're able to bounce back from may have been something they're struggling to do. These underlying facts ON TOP OF the actual physical addiction may be what's keeping them from picking themselves up. Of course, picking up that *insert addictive substance* was a choice... but again, you don't know what triggered the start or how an incident in their lives may have affected them. Maybe it was just being young and dumb. Maybe it was much more serious. Either way, something is very likely plaguing that person and drawing them back in. You clearly have a lot of experience here which actually makes me surprised at your outlook on this. Do you feel like that's a common feeling across your department, among clinical staff?
ETA: not to say your opinion is necessarily wrong here... just different from mine.
Agreed. For me, I was trying to find an escape from the feelings after a sexual assault. The choices I made to cope weren't the best, and I get that. I was also 16 years old, so the decision making part of my brain (the prefrontal cortex) wasn't fully developed. Someone who has arrested development may not make the best decisions even into their mid to late 20's, if ever, due to trauma. Or maybe not even something that many of us may find traumatic, but we're all different. Luckily, my brain chemistry is not predisposed for addiction. Others are not so lucky. I think that the people who use their addiction as a "crutch" have so much going on in their heads in addition to the addiction, but I don't think the people who use "disease" as crutch are mentally ready for recovery. People with all sorts of diseases use their disease as a crutch though.
Well said on the gorilla issue @bnsmith85. Not sure if anyone follows Bunmi Laditan on fb or not, but she posted the PERFECT letter to the mother of the child the other day.
on a lighter note whoever invented mayo is a horrible person.
I believe, and this is my completely fictional and self fabricated belief, but I'm holding onto it- is that Mayo was created solely to aid in the formation of potato salad, deviled eggs, and tuna salad. Then somewhere down the line, some poor lost soul accidentally used it as a condiment, because there just wasn't ANY mustard anywhere within a 100 mile radius, and due to this mustard dry spell, a bad bad habit was formed.
@ibabyloveb87 OMG if you are talking about just mayo and bread, I used to do the same thing! I still love mayo though. Miracle whip... that shit is HORRIBLE.
Hahaha!!! I'll fully admit that mayo sandwiches are pretty gross, but I just loved them so much as a kid. My dad used to get so mad at me for eating them. Mayo adds moisture so sammies aren't too dry and add a LITTLE flavor! I'm not a huge fan of mustard on my sandwiches, it's too overpowering. A LITTLE is ok.
@Julia70286 Mayo sandwiches sound bizarre but otherwise I agree haha mayo is awesome. It's creamy and adds just a little flavor. Mustard can be overpowering and only goes with certain things.
Omg, mayo. My husband got mad at me because I couldn't handle it and wiped off the hanging globs of mayo from his sandwich once he got up to refill his drink. I couldn't handle looking at it or imagining him eating it. Not super proud, but I blame pregnancy.
@Julia70286 yep! With a little salt and pepper. My grandfather grew up eating mayo sandwiches because they couldn't always get meat. So he made them for me because he just likes them. I think it's disgusting now for sure!! Ughhhhhh.
I eat eat mustard on pretty much any sandwich I eat. And of course on hot dogs and burgers. That's about it.
Anything else I probably eat with ranch....
Me:33 DH: 34 Married: May 2011 TTC #1: May 2015 DS: 10/20/2016 TTC #2: June 2019 #2 EDD: 2/20/2020
I also love mayo, especially with my fries, and I grew up eating it on sliced tomatoes, so I can see how it would be good on a tomato sandwich @sjo_thetwins
DH is an addict. He was in a very bad car accident at 16, they had to reconstruct his face. They gave him opiates. Once he ran out he went into withdrawal and began abusing. He was a heavy user for 3 years. He managed to get off them at 19. I met him at 20. He's stayed clean for the last 15 years we've been together, but he still struggles. He used to turn to alcohol until he realized that was becoming a problem as well. He goes to meetings and counseling to stay sober. He's still an addict. He CHOSE to give up drugs, and then alcohol, he chooses it every day still, but he did not choose to become an addict.
Omg reading about mayo is making me nauseous. I can't even eat anything white b/c after a few bites I'll convince myself mayo is in it. I HATE, LOATHE, DESPISE the stuff.
Japanese mayo is the shit! I put it on eeeeeeee'rything! It's got an actual flavor (kind of makes me think of tartar sauce sans the crunchy stuff) and a very smooth texture (not that weird gelatinous shit regular mayo). Today alone I put it on my eggs and hash browns. GIMME!
ETA: I'm meh about regular mayo. When it comes to egg or tuna salad, I actually make mine with mashed avocado. Creamy and delicious!
I'm going to be that person and say I do think it's outrageous that the decision to kill the gorilla lasted way longer than the decision to kill Tamir Rice. Not only that but people, overall, seem more outraged over the death of this gorilla than a human boy. Both situations involved something that could be construed as dangerous or ambiguous: The police officer in the Tamir Rice case didn't know if Rice's gun was real or not; zoo officials didn't know if the boy in the enclosure was in danger or not. But the general public has been far more concerned about justice for a gorilla.
@kmolleltz for some reason Americans have become obsessed w justice for animals lately and not for humans. it's been boggling my mind. between the gorilla, and the dogs in China, you'd think they'd see there are more pressing domestic issues like PEOPLE killing each other.
Re: UO Thursday (6/2)
I feel the same way about my depression. It's a disease and I will never live without it, but my actions because of it affect my family and I have to take responsibility for that. I will have days where I fail, but I don't say "I have a disease, cut my some slack." I pick myself up and try again. Someday I may loose that fight, but I'll never win if I don't take responsibility. Having a disease is not a license to use it as a crutch.
You clearly have a lot of experience here which actually makes me surprised at your outlook on this. Do you feel like that's a common feeling across your department, among clinical staff?
ETA: not to say your opinion is necessarily wrong here... just different from mine.
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
On the flip side, my baby brother is a junkie. He chose that life, refuses to help himself or recieve help, and will rob, cheat, steal, and lie his ass off for his next fix, ride the "addiction is a disease- I'm just sick" thing, and keep doing what he's doing. I DO agree that addiction is a disease. I do believe that addicts are sick. But as with any ailment, if you're sick, GO TO A DOCTOR AND GET TREATED. If you won't do that, I won't sympathize.
@bnsmith85, I completely see your point and it is totally valid--it just baffles me that most of the people I see do nothing to help themselves but constantly say how they want a different life, they are tired of this life, they want to be there for their families.. and yet they get clean and get back out and use whatever chosen substance.
So why are people not talking about that?
BFP #1: 7/15/15, SB: 11/14/15
Rainbow baby DS born 9/29/16!!
BFP #3 3/26/18 | Due 12/3/18
DH: 34
Married: May 2011
TTC #1: May 2015
DS: 10/20/2016
TTC #2: June 2019
#2 EDD: 2/20/2020
BFP #1: 7/15/15, SB: 11/14/15
Rainbow baby DS born 9/29/16!!
BFP #3 3/26/18 | Due 12/3/18
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
How do you guys feel about aioli?
BFP #1: 7/15/15, SB: 11/14/15
Rainbow baby DS born 9/29/16!!
BFP #3 3/26/18 | Due 12/3/18
ETA: I didn't know so many people hated mayo!
Mayo FTW. Especially on tomato sandwiches.
busy places and kids who won't stroller need a leash.
My grandfather grew up eating mayo sandwiches because they couldn't always get meat. So he made them for me because he just likes them. I think it's disgusting now for sure!! Ughhhhhh.
I eat eat mustard on pretty much any sandwich I eat. And of course on hot dogs and burgers. That's about it.
Anything else I probably eat with ranch....
DH: 34
Married: May 2011
TTC #1: May 2015
DS: 10/20/2016
TTC #2: June 2019
#2 EDD: 2/20/2020
andplusalso mayo rules!
ETA: I'm meh about regular mayo. When it comes to egg or tuna salad, I actually make mine with mashed avocado. Creamy and delicious!
Im off to go eat a spoonful of mayo now...
I'll take mayo any day. On a sandwich, to mix in tuna or egg salad. Or to make my special french fry drip (mayo, ketchup, chili sauce).
I'm going to be that person and say
I do think it's outrageous that the decision to kill the gorilla lasted way longer than the decision to kill Tamir Rice. Not only that but people, overall, seem more outraged over the death of this gorilla than a human boy.
Both situations involved something that could be construed as dangerous or ambiguous: The police officer in the Tamir Rice case didn't know if Rice's gun was real or not; zoo officials didn't know if the boy in the enclosure was in danger or not. But the general public has been far more concerned about justice for a gorilla.