@krzyriver@MRSCORKER@zuzu87- Good to know I'm not alone! Maybe once I have the anatomy scan I'll relax a bit... Who am I kidding, I'm always going to check.
@krzyriver@MRSCORKER@zuzu87- Good to know I'm not alone! Maybe once I have the anatomy scan I'll relax a bit... Who am I kidding, I'm always going to check.
Yeah, it's habit now. I probably won't stop until this kid is 4.
Me: 32 & DH: 37
Married: November 2014
TTC #1 Since: October 2015
BFP #1: 11/18/15 - CP BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16 IT'S A BOY!!!! DS Born 10/16/16
2. Next milestone you're looking forward to? Feeling the baby kick. I THINK I feel him moving around in there, but I will feel better when I feel something definitive.
3. Rant/Rave/Positive Vibes: Just positive vibes. Next week will the marker week of when we lost our last, so I'm just trying to stay positive.
4. GTKY: What colors/theme are you going with for baby's nursery? We're doing a subtle vintage disneyland theme, nothing too cartoony. We just picked up paint samples yesterday and are doing the walls light yellow, with cream trim. Furniture will also be a cream color and maybe pops of teal and coral in the accents. We found these great vintage posters of Adventureland, Tomorrowland, Fantasyland and Frontierland that we plan to put up and help tie in the theme.
I don't check tp really because mine was a mmc too, but I do have a constant fear that it happened and I won't find out until my next u/s because that's what it was the last time. This makes me somewhat anxious between my own doppler checks and anticipation of my u/s appts straight up terrifying....I probably need to get that under control because the last time my BP reading at the beginning of my appt was a little high when it's normally on the low side
@UponAStar16 I asked my doc to wait until after the US to take my Bp for this reason. She was happy to do that for me and I know I got a more accurate reading because of it.
Me: 32 & DH: 37
Married: November 2014
TTC #1 Since: October 2015
BFP #1: 11/18/15 - CP BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16 IT'S A BOY!!!! DS Born 10/16/16
I totally check TP. Every time. I'm more scared of an MMC though. The wait for ultrasounds is definitely nervewracking, and I feel like I got no reassurance from my last ultrasounds because of the Doppler fiasco. Cannot wait to start feeling unmistakable kicks . . .
DH and I: Early/mid 30s Married 7/15
TTC #1 as of 8/15
BFP 11/21/15 -- MC confirmed 12/1/15 BFP #2 2/18/16
@MRSCORKER good idea! Haha, I knew why it was high but still, I started worrying then that I was developing preeclampsia so early, and when they retook it at the end of the appt it was still high. I'll ask them to just try after, because any other time I take it on my home machine or when they take it at non-ultrasound appts, it's not high
I'm feeling so paranoid today and I don't know why. I'm not feeling movement on a regular basis yet so I have no reason to worry about not feeling anything yet today, my bump is clearly growing but for some reason I feel like it's "less firm" today than it has been and I'm just in a tail spin. I guess this is just my normal pre-US jitters but it sucks
Me: 32 & DH: 37
Married: November 2014
TTC #1 Since: October 2015
BFP #1: 11/18/15 - CP BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16 IT'S A BOY!!!! DS Born 10/16/16
Aw, @MRSCORKER- I'm sorry you're feeling so nervous!! I can totally sympathize! I haven't felt any movement at all yet, so I'm constantly second guessing everything everyday. But, then I go down my list of reassurance: I tell myself, there's been no spotting, no odd cramps (and boy, do I remember the cramps from my past loss, so I would KNOW if they were worrisome), we've hit the point where the "bad things we worry about" are at such a slight risk of occurring now, some women don't feel anything until after 20 weeks, I still have to pee A LOT, I still REALLY want pickles (in a more than usual way) and, most importantly, there's really no reason for me to think something is wrong. So, rub your bump, take a deep breath and think positively! I'm sure all is just right with your little one and think of how relieved you'll be the moment they pop up on the US screen! Sending happy thoughts your way!
I'm feeling so paranoid today and I don't know why. I'm not feeling movement on a regular basis yet so I have no reason to worry about not feeling anything yet today, my bump is clearly growing but for some reason I feel like it's "less firm" today than it has been and I'm just in a tail spin. I guess this is just my normal pre-US jitters but it sucks
Creepy internet hugs @MRSCORKER. PGAL brain sucks big time, and I don't know when (or if) it really goes away. Hopefully you can find some calm and get reassurance soon. When's your next US?
DH and I: Early/mid 30s Married 7/15
TTC #1 as of 8/15
BFP 11/21/15 -- MC confirmed 12/1/15 BFP #2 2/18/16
@MRSCORKER - I'm sorry you're going through this. I don't think PGAL brain goes away. I was feeling decently confident and happy about this pregnancy, but yesterday I managed to convince myself I had preeclampsia, despite my blood pressure being perfectly normal.
I don't know if this is something that might interest you, but I've found that my prenatal yoga classes help me to separate what's actually happening in my body from the crazy things my brain thinks, if that makes sense. It makes it easier for me to say, that symptom is in your head, your body is fine, which helps me. Good luck!
@MRSCORKER I felt the exact same way two or three days ago. My bump did not feel firm at all so you can imagine my pgal brain was on 100!. I was really freaking out. However, the next day it went back to feeling nice and pretty firm so that eased my nerves a lot. It's even popped out a bit more as well! I hope your next US comes quick and u get to ease ur nerves.
I'm feeling so paranoid today and I don't know why. I'm not feeling movement on a regular basis yet so I have no reason to worry about not feeling anything yet today, my bump is clearly growing but for some reason I feel like it's "less firm" today than it has been and I'm just in a tail spin. I guess this is just my normal pre-US jitters but it sucks
Creepy internet hugs @MRSCORKER. PGAL brain sucks big time, and I don't know when (or if) it really goes away. Hopefully you can find some calm and get reassurance soon. When's your next US?
My AS is Tuesday. I just wish I could get some kicks for reassurance in the meantime!
@depineta I've been telling myself I'm going to start going to pre-natal yoga. I think it's time I suck it up and go. I'm not sure why I've been avoiding it.
Thanks for the kind words ladies. I've been extra tired the past few days and I think that messes with my head. My mom used to always say "everything looks better after a good nights sleep". I just wish I could get a good nights sleep!
Me: 32 & DH: 37
Married: November 2014
TTC #1 Since: October 2015
BFP #1: 11/18/15 - CP BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16 IT'S A BOY!!!! DS Born 10/16/16
@MRSCORKER I can totally relate to this!! Do you have an at home doppler? I have one (the sonoline b) and use it pretty much every other day just to make sure the heartbeat is still going strong. It provides so much anxiety relief, especially because I'm not quite sure I feel movements yet either.
PGAL brain sucks. Hang in there!! Hopefully we will all be feeling consistent movements soon.
@MRSCORKER I can totally relate to this!! Do you have an at home doppler? I have one (the sonoline b) and use it pretty much every other day just to make sure the heartbeat is still going strong. It provides so much anxiety relief, especially because I'm not quite sure I feel movements yet either.
PGAL brain sucks. Hang in there!! Hopefully we will all be feeling consistent movements soon.
I don't have a doppler. I haven't let myself buy one because I'm afraid that I wouldn't be able to find the heartbeat (I'm told I have an anterior placenta) and then I will just freak out more. I think it's better for me to just assume everything is fine unless I'm told otherwise. The only problem with this method is that I have these freak out moments for basically no reason.
Edited for clarificiation
Me: 32 & DH: 37
Married: November 2014
TTC #1 Since: October 2015
BFP #1: 11/18/15 - CP BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16 IT'S A BOY!!!! DS Born 10/16/16
@MRSCORKER If you think it'll cause worse anxiety, a Doppler could potentially be a bad idea. But I have an anterior placenta and I'm about 230lbs and hubby found the heartbeat within a couple minutes last week. I didn't use it much early on because I had so many ultrasounds, but Monday will be my last.... as long as everything goes smoothly. So I'll probably be using it more now mid-second trimester and third trimester to ease my PGAL anxiety. And at this point, it'll be easier to find the heartbeat. So it might not be the worst idea now that you're farther along, but that's up to you.
@MRSCORKER Totally makes sense. It sounds like everything is perfectly fine, and it's just PGAL brain. When is your next appointment? I hope it's soon so you can get some reassurance! If it's not, I noticed you like relatively close to me. Here is where we went for our gender ultrasound. They were very nice and it wasn't too expensive. They do heartbeat checks there too, and are open on the weekend. Just in case you need some reassurance in between appointments. https://babyjoy3d4dmobileultrasound.com/
That second tri loss thread is freaking me out! I had to leave my desk and go for a walk. It's so scary knowing that we are never really in a safe zone during pregnancy...
@MRSCORKER Totally makes sense. It sounds like everything is perfectly fine, and it's just PGAL brain. When is your next appointment? I hope it's soon so you can get some reassurance! If it's not, I noticed you like relatively close to me. Here is where we went for our gender ultrasound. They were very nice and it wasn't too expensive. They do heartbeat checks there too, and are open on the weekend. Just in case you need some reassurance in between appointments. https://babyjoy3d4dmobileultrasound.com/
There is a place near me in Baltimore County that does this as well. I might make a visit sometime between my AS and whatever (if any) late term scans. I want to make sure everything is A-Ok before going there though because they can't tell you if something is wrong.
Me: 32 & DH: 37
Married: November 2014
TTC #1 Since: October 2015
BFP #1: 11/18/15 - CP BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16 IT'S A BOY!!!! DS Born 10/16/16
@MRSCORKER That's awesome there is one closer to you!! I did ask her of everything looked okay, and she said she wasn't taking any measurements, so couldn't tell me definitively, but she did tell me that everything looked normal and nothing jumped out at her that caused concern. That was enough reassurance for me.
She hit the nail on the head in the article. SO many conflicting feelings, and to be honest, I've been VERY open with friends and even on social media regarding our loss. I hate that it's so taboo to talk about, so I will not just keep quiet and shy away from a painful and vulnerable discussion. But after every doctor's appt and ultrasound, my mom asks, "Don't you feel better? Now you can just relax and have a happy pregnancy." EVERY TIME I have to tell her, "For now. I won't feel safe until I have this baby in my arms."
One of the things I think I struggle with most are the mixed emotions regarding celebrating this baby. He deserves every bit of pomp and circumstance as our last. It's just scary. Today though, we picked up our changing table and I am excited. So it's one day at a time, one foot in front of the other. And I'm so glad to have the support of all of you.
Just to give you ladies an update, had my A/S today and it went well - everything seems fine. I didn't even check TB today as I freaked out in anticipation, so I'm really glad I didn't see that loss thread. As usual before scans, yesterday the dread started setting in and I convinced myself that everything was wrong. I'm high risk, couldn't even find the hb with doppler (I think because I've gotten worse at finding it now that she's in a different spot), and still am not feeling definite movement (even though lots of people apparently are)...but everything was fine. Just hoping that everyone having a freak out now can either borrow some reassurance, or that you get your reassurance at appts soon!
@UponAStar16 Yay for a good scan! I've been starting to freak out too. My scan is Monday.
@Pupatella I could not even bring myself to open the thread. I feel horribly guilty because I want to send well wishes, but I just can't. Once I read whatever she posted, I can't unread it. And I'm scared that it will trigger worse anxiety than what I'm already dealing with.
Annoyed with my mom today who told me everything would turn out well because she just had a feeling. Yeah, that's scientifically accurate, mom. I'm totally reassured now. (I mean, I know she is trying to be supportive, but still.)
Re: PGAL check in **5/16**
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
2. Next milestone you're looking forward to? Feeling the baby kick. I THINK I feel him moving around in there, but I will feel better when I feel something definitive.
3. Rant/Rave/Positive Vibes: Just positive vibes. Next week will the marker week of when we lost our last, so I'm just trying to stay positive.
4. GTKY: What colors/theme are you going with for baby's nursery? We're doing a subtle vintage disneyland theme, nothing too cartoony. We just picked up paint samples yesterday and are doing the walls light yellow, with cream trim. Furniture will also be a cream color and maybe pops of teal and coral in the accents. We found these great vintage posters of Adventureland, Tomorrowland, Fantasyland and Frontierland that we plan to put up and help tie in the theme.
BFP #1: 7/15/15, SB: 11/14/15
Rainbow baby DS born 9/29/16!!
BFP #3 3/26/18 | Due 12/3/18
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
Married 7/15
BFP #2 2/18/16
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
Married 7/15
BFP #2 2/18/16
I don't know if this is something that might interest you, but I've found that my prenatal yoga classes help me to separate what's actually happening in my body from the crazy things my brain thinks, if that makes sense. It makes it easier for me to say, that symptom is in your head, your body is fine, which helps me. Good luck!
@depineta I've been telling myself I'm going to start going to pre-natal yoga. I think it's time I suck it up and go. I'm not sure why I've been avoiding it.
Thanks for the kind words ladies. I've been extra tired the past few days and I think that messes with my head. My mom used to always say "everything looks better after a good nights sleep". I just wish I could get a good nights sleep!
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
PGAL brain sucks. Hang in there!! Hopefully we will all be feeling consistent movements soon.
Edited for clarificiation
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
TW -
It's about fears that come with your pregnancy after miscarriage.
https://www.scarymommy.com/eva-amurri-miscarriage-blog-post/
One of the things I think I struggle with most are the mixed emotions regarding celebrating this baby. He deserves every bit of pomp and circumstance as our last. It's just scary. Today though, we picked up our changing table and I am excited. So it's one day at a time, one foot in front of the other. And I'm so glad to have the support of all of you.
BFP #1: 7/15/15, SB: 11/14/15
Rainbow baby DS born 9/29/16!!
BFP #3 3/26/18 | Due 12/3/18
"Until a woman has suffered a miscarriage, it’s hard to imagine it actually happening. But once it has? It’s hard to imagine it not happening."
This is exactly how I feel during this pregnancy. Alternating between happiness/optimism and just knowing something is about to go wrong.
@Pupatella I could not even bring myself to open the thread. I feel horribly guilty because I want to send well wishes, but I just can't. Once I read whatever she posted, I can't unread it. And I'm scared that it will trigger worse anxiety than what I'm already dealing with.