Usually my MIL is amazing and I love her despite the cultural differences. However, a family fight broke out because DH found out she has apparently been going behind my back and telling my SIL (her daughter) every little thing that annoyed her about me instead of just confronting me. For example: she complained to my SIL (who doesn't like me; I suspect it's because I don't care nor wish to worship the ground be walks on) that while they were staying at our house I complained a lot about water being spilled on the kitchen floor. For clarification; I remember this incident. It was ONE TIME, and I only said anything because a) I almost fell when I slipped in said spilled water and b) my MIL has a nasty habit of destroying my kitchen everytime she cooks because unless I make traditional food; she refuses to eat, and will make another meal for the entire family (her husband,MH, and my BIL that is also staying with us) and wants them to eat what she then made instead of what I made. Anyway, so my BIL called my MIL to try and "smooth" things over because MH basically told his mom that if she can't tell me what's bothering her she shouldn't be dragging my name down through the family especially since she knows how much my SIL doesn't like me and how SIL will always take his moms side.
When "smoothing it over" my BIL gave an assumption that he thought I did. Basically, he came to stay with us (and has been here since)!while MH was out of the country on a work assignment because it was early in the pregnancy and we had already suffered a miscarriage. MH didn't want me left alone in case God forbid, something happened, and we don't have any family in state. He went out one night and I was cool with it, but when I tried to contact him; I couldn't get through. MH happened to call and I told him I wanted to go to bed but BIL wasn't home yet so I didn't feel right not setting the security system. Since MH was out of the country and couldn't contact his brother; he called his older brother, who them got through to my BIL. Now, my BIL assumed I called the older BIL to report him. Texts and call log show I never did such thing, and even stated I didn't want older BIL calling younger BIL because I had a feeling trouble would start. But the facts were checked AFTER he told my MIL his assumption. Now, I had hoped that my MIL knowing me would say "that doesn't sound like something she would do", but nope, she goes and tells her findings to my SIL who tells her aunt, whom then calls MH about his wife being disrespectful.
My BIL was supposed to call and say he had it wrong, I didn't do those things because me saying it will now hold zero credit and MH will just be defending me. It's been almost 2 weeks and he has yet to call. I'm pissed at him and my MIL because I was completely innocent. Just growing a tiny human, and minding my own damn business.
Can I do a general family vent on here? So my due date is tomorrow. I have 3 other kids to juggle while I'm at the hospital, and it has taken so much planning and organization to make sure all my bases will be covered. I enlisted my family's help ages ago, and recently sent everyone an email with all the info they need, who is doing what, etc. I included freaking easy to read charts! I spoke with each of them to go over what they will be doing. Now that my due date is tomorrow, everything is falling apart. My mom says "Oh I can't take the kids Thursday, I forgot about this meeting." Really!? Cause my due date hasn't been on the calendar for 9 months!? I reminded her that she is picking up my kids from school tomorrow while I am at my Dr appt, and she was like "What? I am?". YES! I asked you last week! You said yes! My sister's nanny quit suddenly last week, and she was going to watch my daughter during the day. I have been hounding my sister to ask if her new nanny would be willing to watch my daughter (I literally have no backup plan here!) and she hasn't gotten back to me. My husband is so stressed about work and school and new baby - I get it - but he has been COMPLETELY scatter brained. Lost his work ID, lost the extra set of van keys (which I was supposed to give to my dad today so he has them when I'm in the hospital and he is doing school drop-offs), and husband was supposed to drive to work today so he would have his car if I go into labor but he forgot and took the train. No one is following THE PLAN I spent ages putting together. I'm feeling like no one cares and they can't be depended on, which is a problem! I guess I'll just birth this baby at home, pop him in his carseat, and go pick up my kids from school! *crying face*
Me too! And things are falling apart on my end too. I'm having to just go-with-the-flow on it sadly. Best case scenario for me is everything works out fine and everyone pulls through. Worst case scenario is either birthing baby at home and then resuming my day to day tasks and responsibilities... or DH isn't there for the birth because he will be watching our 3 kiddos. Ugh it's so frustrating. I hope your family pulls it together for you guys!
I cannot stand how my MIL disregards every wish/concern my husband and I have regarding LO. We have told her numerous times we want a private birth and we will contact her afterwards. Now she's passive aggressively mentioning how "people" ask her if she's bothered with the fact that she doesn't get to be there watching when her grandchild is born. I'm sorry, who's having the baby, me or her? I could give a rat's ass about what other people think about her being there for the birth of my 1st child.
DH and I took her to breakfast on mother's day and mentioned a cruise we will be going on next summer for my 30th birthday without the baby. She deliberately waits until I leave to the restroom to ask tell DH that she better be able to watch the baby while we are on the cruise instead of my mother who will be her primary care provider while I work. Luckily DH has no problem reminding her of our conditions that as long as she continues to smoke, she will not be watching our baby.
It seems as if this woman loves to live her life constantly making mine miserable.
Re: MIL thread
Usually my MIL is amazing and I love her despite the cultural differences. However, a family fight broke out because DH found out she has apparently been going behind my back and telling my SIL (her daughter) every little thing that annoyed her about me instead of just confronting me. For example: she complained to my SIL (who doesn't like me; I suspect it's because I don't care nor wish to worship the ground be walks on) that while they were staying at our house I complained a lot about water being spilled on the kitchen floor. For clarification; I remember this incident. It was ONE TIME, and I only said anything because a) I almost fell when I slipped in said spilled water and b) my MIL has a nasty habit of destroying my kitchen everytime she cooks because unless I make traditional food; she refuses to eat, and will make another meal for the entire family (her husband,MH, and my BIL that is also staying with us) and wants them to eat what she then made instead of what I made.
Anyway, so my BIL called my MIL to try and "smooth" things over because MH basically told his mom that if she can't tell me what's bothering her she shouldn't be dragging my name down through the family especially since she knows how much my SIL doesn't like me and how SIL will always take his moms side.
When "smoothing it over" my BIL gave an assumption that he thought I did. Basically, he came to stay with us (and has been here since)!while MH was out of the country on a work assignment because it was early in the pregnancy and we had already suffered a miscarriage. MH didn't want me left alone in case God forbid, something happened, and we don't have any family in state. He went out one night and I was cool with it, but when I tried to contact him; I couldn't get through. MH happened to call and I told him I wanted to go to bed but BIL wasn't home yet so I didn't feel right not setting the security system. Since MH was out of the country and couldn't contact his brother; he called his older brother, who them got through to my BIL. Now, my BIL assumed I called the older BIL to report him. Texts and call log show I never did such thing, and even stated I didn't want older BIL calling younger BIL because I had a feeling trouble would start. But the facts were checked AFTER he told my MIL his assumption. Now, I had hoped that my MIL knowing me would say "that doesn't sound like something she would do", but nope, she goes and tells her findings to my SIL who tells her aunt, whom then calls MH about his wife being disrespectful.
My BIL was supposed to call and say he had it wrong, I didn't do those things because me saying it will now hold zero credit and MH will just be defending me. It's been almost 2 weeks and he has yet to call. I'm pissed at him and my MIL because I was completely innocent. Just growing a tiny human, and minding my own damn business.
::rant over::
DH and I took her to breakfast on mother's day and mentioned a cruise we will be going on next summer for my 30th birthday without the baby. She deliberately waits until I leave to the restroom to ask tell DH that she better be able to watch the baby while we are on the cruise instead of my mother who will be her primary care provider while I work. Luckily DH has no problem reminding her of our conditions that as long as she continues to smoke, she will not be watching our baby.
It seems as if this woman loves to live her life constantly making mine miserable.