November 2016 Moms

Siblings

If you haven't already, how are you planning on telling your child(ren) about your pregnancy? When? Oh, and how old are these children? Looking for ideas!
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Re: Siblings

  • I haven't figured out how but I plan to tell DD and DS after my appointment next week, assuming it goes well. I'll be 11 weeks then.

    I haven't told them yet since I don't want to have to explain pregnancy loss to them if I can avoid it. And I wasn't ready for all of daycare (and thus all our friends) to find out.
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  • We told our son by showing him an ultrasound when he asked me directly if we were going to have any more babies since I didn't want to lie. He's nine and I did explain to him that sometimes things go wrong especially the earlier it is which is why we hadn't told him. 

    Hes is really excited to be participating in telling our youngest (she's 5) which we're going to do next week aft my NT scan. We are going to get her a book about being a big sister and give it to her wrapped up. We'll see if she figures that out, but if not we're letting him spill the beans at that point.  
    K.

    Son, K, 9 | Daughter, C, 5 | Daughter, M, expected November 7, 2016
  • My stepson is 5 and is a very matter of fact sort of kid. Last time there was a big event (the death of a pet) we had this whole story and he listened, the said '0h, okay, him died' and that was that.

    So for this, we told his mom first (for politeness, but also to ascertain if he already knew something about babies) and once she confirmed he did, we just said 'great, so J has a baby in her tummy' and that was that :-)
  • My daughter is only 15mo, so she wouldn't really understand yet. Once we have the anatomy scan I'm planning to buy a couple relevant books for kids her age and start try to explain that she's going to have a little brother or sister. Any suggestions from moms who've done this already would be very much appreciated!
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  • We told our 5 (almost 6) year old son right away because my husband had has a big mouth and can't keep a secret. As soon as I told my husband his whole family already knew :/ so we bought our son a big brother tshirt and gave it to him. I'm 10 weeks now. 
  • We told our oldest kids (12 and 9) on Tuesday after our sonogram (at 8 weeks). May have been a little early, but I felt that it was an ok time to tell them, plus I can't keep secrets especially when I'm feeling like puking. 

    We we told them we had a surprise for them and told them to hold out their hands and close their eyes. I placed a sonogram in their hands and then they opened their eyes. My youngest started yelling out of joy and my oldest was trying not to jump to conclusions so just kept asking what it was. They are over the moon! Seriously you would've thought we surprised them with a Disney World trip. 

    We we haven't told my stepson, 4, who lived out of state but will when and if he's allowed to visit us soon. 
  • We told DD1 (3) this week.  We have friends who have been pregnant and had babies so she knows what we are talking about. We showed her the ultrasound and gave her a "i'm a big sister" book.  We already let daycare know so we could be on the waiting list for infant room so I'm not really worried about her telling anyone.
    Me: 30 DH:31 DD:3
    3/6/16 BFP 
    EDD: 11/14/16

  • Also, I'd like to add that thanks to technology, half of my daughter's grade knew I was pregnant within an hour of her finding out. Gotta love it.
  • @KilgraveMadeMeDoItThank you!! I will check those out.
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  • muybuenomuybueno member
    edited April 2016
    When I'm about halfway through, we'll sit my 3 yo down and explain why my belly is getting big. I predict he'll be very matter-of-fact about it and then drop it until the next time we bring it up.

    I plan to have my iPhone video camera running during the convo, because I think it'll be a cool sibling memory for them to look back on in the future. Convos with 3 yo's are pretty amusing...
    DX PCOS Jan 2012
    IUI #1 Feb 2012= DS1 born 11/2012
    Unmedicated BFP (first post-weaning cycle)=DS2 born 9/2014
    Unmedicated BFP (first post-weaning cycle again)= EDD 11/2016
  • For my second, we told DD that she was getting a sister, but she didn't really understand (she turned 2 a week after her sister arrived).

    For this one, I'm not expecting DD 2 (she'll turn 2 just before this one arrives) to understand but DD 1 (she'll turn 4 just before this one arrives) will. Our plan is to wait until my next appointment (5/4) when we'll hear the heartbeat (hopefully). Assuming all is well, we'll show her pictures of her & her sister as babies and let her know that she's getting another sibling. She's been pointing out babies and gets really excited about them lately (every time she sees one she goes "awww...that's my baby!") so I'm hopeful that she'll be cool with it.
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  • @SRose109, we liked this book (once we knew we were having a boy)

    https://www.amazon.com/Getting-Brother-Sheila-Sweeny-Higginson/dp/1442420219/ref=asap_bc?ie=UTF8

    "Baby brothers are small...baby brothers are cute.
    But they can be a pain-- and that is the truth.
    Your brother will poop.
    He will spit. He will cry.
    And you'd better watch out-- or he'll pee in your eye!"

    It's simple, rhymes, and covers some good and bad parts of having a baby brother (there's a version for baby sisters too).
  • shevaCC said:
    @SRose109, we liked this book (once we knew we were having a boy)

    https://www.amazon.com/Getting-Brother-Sheila-Sweeny-Higginson/dp/1442420219/ref=asap_bc?ie=UTF8

    "Baby brothers are small...baby brothers are cute.
    But they can be a pain-- and that is the truth.
    Your brother will poop.
    He will spit. He will cry.
    And you'd better watch out-- or he'll pee in your eye!"

    It's simple, rhymes, and covers some good and bad parts of having a baby brother (there's a version for baby sisters too).
    Oh my goodness!! That's hilarious, and also if I'm being honest a genuine worry of mine about having a boy.
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  • @SRose109, Obviously that was our favorite line! We read it when my DD was about 2 and she would shriek with laughter.
  • My oldest is 4 and we are holding off on telling her if we can (she has already mentioned how big my belly is getting).  Partially because I don't want her to have to live through a miscarriage if that happens, and partially because I think 7 months is a very long time for a little kid to wait.  I'd like to cut that wait as long as possible.  
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    BFP 3.8.16  EDD 11.20.16

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  • Our daughter is 7. We decided to tell her at 9 weeks, since we were planning to tell family when the doctor gave us the all clear and wanted her to know first. We made her a special shirt that said big sister, and a copy of the best ultrasound picture.
    There's always the chance you'll lose the baby, the truth is that that can happen at any time, even after the baby is here! If you wait until the risk is gone they'll know by themselves.
    She is very excited and 6 and a halfmonths seems like a really long ways away for her, but I'm glad we decided to tell her early on so she can be a part of the whole process. We just waited until the doctor said I had no immediate risk or signs of miscarriage, my levels were perfect, and the heartbeat was strong
  • LikeICantEvenLikeICantEven member
    edited April 2016
    Same boat as you @SRose109
    My son is 21 months, I have been pointing to my abdomen and telling him there's a baby in there, maybe a brother, maybe a sister. He only laughs and pats it super hard, then jams his finger in my belly button. 

    I did just buy him "My New Baby" 
    Link: https://amzn.com/1846432766 and plan on getting him a baby doll as well, so we can show him how to be gentle, how to hold it, etc. A few of my girlfriends recommended this, they said it worked out really well with their toddlers. It's a visualization for them, gives them an idea of size and weight.

    I told him this the other day and he leaned over and planted a kiss on my tummy (totally circumstantial, he kisses everything randomly) but it made me melt.

    Edit: some unsolicited advice about little boys, don't bother with the peepee teepees, they just get blasted off with the full spray. Just drop a baby wipe over them, it's more effective for some reason. Mine got the nursery wall more than me.
  • @homeydontplaythat I have no idea if it's accurate or not, but I've been told that it's the cooler air outside the diaper that triggers little boys to pee when they're uncovered so when I was changing my son, I'd just open his diaper for a few seconds, cover him up for another few seconds, and then if he was going to pee that's when he did it. It was a while ago now, but I don't think I got peed on after I'd started doing that. 
    K.

    Son, K, 9 | Daughter, C, 5 | Daughter, M, expected November 7, 2016
  • Our son is only 10 months, so not much point in trying yet!
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  • DD is 2 and doesn't quite get it. But she saw me using the doppler the other day and wanted to use it to listen to the baby in her belly too... Whenever I say there's a baby in Mommy's belly, she picks up my shirt to look :-) My edd is the day after she turns 3. Hoping as we get closer and gets older, she'll understand more.

    MMC 01/26/12 

    MC 12/25/12, D&C 01/05/13

    BFP 03/05/13, EDD 11/12/13. HB 175 @ 9w2d. Its a Girl!

    <3Madeline Lorraine H. <3 Born 11/12/13 @9:10pm, 7lb6oz

    DX with EA/TEF Type C & Tracheomalaysia
    MC @ 13wks 01/15/15 

    DX Septate Uterus - surgery recommended

    BFP 3/18/16, EDD 11/13/16 It's a boy!
    <3 Clint Kiszonas H. <3 Born 11/21/16 @10:38pm, 9lb11oz

    BFP 1/11/18, EDD 9/21/18 
  • @sweetlyuntied, that's adorable!
  • Stepson was happy and unconcerned with us all weekend, his first visit with us since hearing the news. Then, just before we dropped him off with his mother, he turns to me and says 'so, if the baby poos while it is in your tummy, are you going to smell like poo until it comes out?' So funny how their little minds work :-)
  • DD (2 1/2) came with for the first ultra sound at 7 weeks. My sister had a baby last fall and I'm a doula so I have pregnant women around her often so she caught on pretty quick that there was a baby in there. She now plays "pregnant" and makes up details about the baby in her belly lol she will randomly run up and give my tummy kisses too. I love it. 

    Engaged 10/2/1202
    BFP (a lil quicker than expected) 12/7/2012
    Married to my best friend 12/24/2012
    Beautiful baby girl arrived 8/15/2013
    BFP #2 3/13/2016

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  • There is a brand new Bubbly Guppies episode out about being a big sister... My 3 years old was already calling for a baby before we gave her the news. We ended up telling her a little earlier than we thought (9 weeks) but we wanted to capitalize on her excitement.  Now she is all about being a big sister! :)
  • I recorded the Daniel the Tiger episode where his sister is born recorded but my 19 month old isn't as aware as @sweetlyuntied 's DD!  The other day I told him me and daddy were going to go see the baby and he said "cookie?"...

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  • DD is only 19 months so she doesn't understand.  But I've bought her books. It's going to take a lot of work in the next few months to get her used to the idea.  She screams and cries bloody murder anytime I hold a baby until I give the baby back.  It's sad and funny at the same time.
    Baby J #2 due 11.12.16
    Sydney Elizabeth born 9.24.14

  • My son has a toy stroller he loves pushing around. The other day I put a babydoll in it and said, "soon you can help mommy push your baby brother or sister around." Then he screamed and threw the baby out of the carriage. 

    Well on the upside there is plenty of room for improvement...

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  • My son has a toy stroller he loves pushing around. The other day I put a babydoll in it and said, "soon you can help mommy push your baby brother or sister around." Then he screamed and threw the baby out of the carriage. 
    Fan-freaking-tastic. I got DS1 a babydoll when I was expecting DS2, based on what you always read about how you must get a babydoll to help them transition. He was never interested in that damn thing.
    DX PCOS Jan 2012
    IUI #1 Feb 2012= DS1 born 11/2012
    Unmedicated BFP (first post-weaning cycle)=DS2 born 9/2014
    Unmedicated BFP (first post-weaning cycle again)= EDD 11/2016
  • DD is 2, but I don't quite think she'd get it yet. We didn't tell her before we announced (which was today) because she has a big mouth, but I'm not really going to play it up much until it's closer and more real. I want to move her into her big girl room first so she doesn't think the baby is kicking her out of her room....even though that's exactly what's happening hahaha
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  • DD is 2, we brought her to the first ultrasound and H held her and told her that's a baby in moments tummy. we have the US pics in our kitchen and she points and says "baby in tummy" and the. We got her some big sister books. 
  • That face! @KilgraveMadeMeDoIt

    Twinklebell has a nice ring to it.
  • Aww why'd she change her mind? Twinklebell is super cute ;)
  • The kids were arguing all the way home about names. My son is insisting that it'll be a boy and he favours the name Chase. My daughter's insisting it'll be a girl, and she's gone through about six different names but Sofia seems a favourite. The name actually will be either Maisie, if a girl, or if a boy, William or Rory. They don't know that yet. We'll tell them the name when we find out the sex. 
    K.

    Son, K, 9 | Daughter, C, 5 | Daughter, M, expected November 7, 2016
  • @KilgraveMadeMeDoIt omg I love all your names. I'm quitelling partial to William though as that was my grandpa's name
  • My son is 5 and we told him fairly early because he was getting a little concerned about mommy throwing up all the time. He now thinks the baby is jumping up and down on my stomach and that's what is causing the sickness and he thinks it's awesome. We've tried to keep things on a basic level and now that I can pick the baby's HB up on my Doppler it's starting to seem more real to him, I think.
    Me: 38 l DH: 41
    Gavin - 8/27/10
    *TW*
    Gabriel - 2nd tri loss 5/17/16 Trisomy 18 & 21
    Hope -  2nd tri loss 12/7/16 complications from pneumonia


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