How to handle cattiness and stay on the boards.

kms456 · April 2016

I still don't get why anyone would get offended on the internet. It's the damn internet. It's a strangers opinion/thoughts. Better get some tough skin or you're going to cry every time someone tells you what you should/shouldn't be doing with this whole parenting thing. Which is often.

GreenEyedUnicorn · April 2016

UTAmbs11 said:

Seriously...? You all just attacked her post for no reason. If you don't like it, then leave it be is what she was saying.

@Oakleypoozles thank you for sharing as I never would have thought there were block features. The app and Web page already have so many issues, why would they have a good feature like blocking. They also "hall monitor" the boards to make sure people are playing nicely in the sand box. (Makes me think they don't have the feature if they need monitors.)

If you consider what we said to her "attacking", you need to get out more. Geez.

ShallowSeas · April 2016

If people consider this board "catty" and feel "attacked"...how do they function IRL?? This is tame.

SpiritYell0905 · April 2016

Coming up on Real Housewives of The Bump...

Des321 · April 2016

I think this was just a post to attract the "mean girls" so she can block them. Even though there's no reason for that right now...definitely not necessary. This BMB is great so far.

NordyMN89 · April 2016

g8rmama_16 · April 2016

Des321 said:

I think this was just a post to attract the "mean girls" so she can block them. Even though there's no reason for that right now...definitely not necessary. This BMB is great so far.

This board doesn't even have any mean girls!! If that is the case, she just blocked pretty much all of the regulars. The board is going to be super exciting and informative for her.

kms456 · April 2016

If you want a mean girl, I mean I'll bring her out. Because you asked so nicely.

lajoliedreamer · April 2016

SRose109 said:
Her post implied that we'd all been unfriendly and catty, and that's not the case so I think people were just pointing out the silliness of that.

Her post didn't imply that at all! She said there was a lot of it on the bump board for her first pregnancy and that she hadn't seen it here yet, but just wanted to put the information out there. Not once did she say she thought this group was that way.

I personally appreciate the information. I'm not tech dumb, but it would never have occurred to me to try to block someone who was bringing me down. Not that anyone is, but it's a ways until Nov and there are a lot of us, so anything can happen.

muybueno · April 2016

lajoliedreamer said:

SRose109 said:
Her post implied that we'd all been unfriendly and catty, and that's not the case so I think people were just pointing out the silliness of that.

Her post didn't imply that at all! She said there was a lot of it on the bump board for her first pregnancy and that she hadn't seen it here yet, but just wanted to put the information out there. Not once did she say she thought this group was that way.

I personally appreciate the information. I'm not tech dumb, but it would never have occurred to me to try to block someone who was bringing me down. Not that anyone is, but it's a ways until Nov and there are a lot of us, so anything can happen.

To quote "I have seen very little of this here so far but I still feel this is good information." So, she's seen enough for her cattiness radar to be set to "alert mode" perhaps. She's at-the-ready should cattiness rear it's ugly head.

When posting, you gotsta think about how it's going to be perceived, not just the literal words you use. That includes the title. When posting, give a little think to people's perception of your post, and then decide if you care or not. She probably knew it would make people defensive and she didn't care.

Personally, I'm too busy being jealous of OP's computer skillz to be mad about the implication that we are catty. Screen shots embedded in a post? Yes, please. But perhaps next time on a more interesting subject, such as how to fry a bird? (I'm talking to you @Little+Tiny )

Edit: damn you, Bump

thatlauragirl · April 2016

Sigh. Everybody has pretty much covered my thoughts already but I wanted to add this: if people go crazy blocking, a lot of threads aren't going to make a bit of sense to them as time goes by and they can't piece together conversations because they're missing so many replies.
I truly understand blocking if someone is harassing or threatening or ugly. But someone who just isn't my cup of tea? Way easier to just scroll on by them and think "bless their heart" than to block them. Sometimes dissenting personalities and opinions can be a great thing. While I'm more of a "puppies and rainbows" personality myself, I appreciate snark and realism too. Everything in moderation.

FiancB · April 2016

thatlauragirl said:

Sigh. Everybody has pretty much covered my thoughts already but I wanted to add this: if people go crazy blocking, a lot of threads aren't going to make a bit of sense to them as time goes by and they can't piece together conversations because they're missing so many replies.
I truly understand blocking if someone is harassing or threatening or ugly. But someone who just isn't my cup of tea? Way easier to just scroll on by them and think "bless their heart" than to block them. Sometimes dissenting personalities and opinions can be a great thing. While I'm more of a "puppies and rainbows" personality myself, I appreciate snark and realism too. Everything in moderation.

This. I have posted on lots of forums and I don't think I've ever utilized the block feature. It doesn't really make sense unless it's an absolute troll and even then... meh, I prefer to see what my enemies are up to rather than pretend everyone gets along with me. Different strokes.

This probably would've gone over better if it came up naturally in conversation. Let's say a bit of a tiff broke out and someone said Gosh, I sure wish I didn't have to see certain people's posts. OP could roll in like, You know you can block people, right? And if interest was shown and people were confused as to how to do it, OP could continue with their PSA and screenshots.

Instead this seems to come out of nowhere, is presenting like a PSA, and like much praise and worshipping is expected for salvation from the meanies that don't really exist.

DunkinDecaf · April 2016

lajoliedreamer said:

SRose109 said:
Her post implied that we'd all been unfriendly and catty, and that's not the case so I think people were just pointing out the silliness of that.

Her post didn't imply that at all! She said there was a lot of it on the bump board for her first pregnancy and that she hadn't seen it here yet, but just wanted to put the information out there. Not once did she say she thought this group was that way.

I personally appreciate the information. I'm not tech dumb, but it would never have occurred to me to try to block someone who was bringing me down. Not that anyone is, but it's a ways until Nov and there are a lot of us, so anything can happen.

So, it's kinda like @muybueno said. It sets a really an unfriendly tone. Why would you make a post about how to block the catty people unless you think people around here have been a bit rude? I'm sure she didn't mean to offend anyone, but it *does* imply that she thinks the people around here are likely catty ladies.

shamrocandroll · April 2016

thatlauragirl said:

Sigh. Everybody has pretty much covered my thoughts already but I wanted to add this: if people go crazy blocking, a lot of threads aren't going to make a bit of sense to them as time goes by and they can't piece together conversations because they're missing so many replies.
I truly understand blocking if someone is harassing or threatening or ugly. But someone who just isn't my cup of tea? Way easier to just scroll on by them and think "bless their heart" than to block them. Sometimes dissenting personalities and opinions can be a great thing. While I'm more of a "puppies and rainbows" personality myself, I appreciate snark and realism too. Everything in moderation.

@thatlauragirl My boss thinks I invented the phrase "puppies and rainbows" and now uses it ALL THE TIME and makes it a point to tell everyone he says it to that it's my quote. I've told him on multiple occasions I'm not the first person to ever say that, but he continues to tell everyone in my company I invented the phrase, likely making me look like an idiot in the process, haha!

carlatron · April 2016

shamrocandroll said:

thatlauragirl said:

Sigh. Everybody has pretty much covered my thoughts already but I wanted to add this: if people go crazy blocking, a lot of threads aren't going to make a bit of sense to them as time goes by and they can't piece together conversations because they're missing so many replies.
I truly understand blocking if someone is harassing or threatening or ugly. But someone who just isn't my cup of tea? Way easier to just scroll on by them and think "bless their heart" than to block them. Sometimes dissenting personalities and opinions can be a great thing. While I'm more of a "puppies and rainbows" personality myself, I appreciate snark and realism too. Everything in moderation.

@thatlauragirl My boss thinks I invented the phrase "puppies and rainbows" and now uses it ALL THE TIME and makes it a point to tell everyone he says it to that it's my quote. I've told him on multiple occasions I'm not the first person to ever say that, but he continues to tell everyone in my company I invented the phrase, likely making me look like an idiot in the process, haha!

My boss thinks I invented "not my circus, not my monkeys." He always says it and credits me!

NatashaSprout · April 2016

Really, a grown woman blocking someone so their internet birth forum experience isn't ruined?

I just, I can't even. This is awesome. As you were.

msu_gal · April 2016

I've been snapping at people all day and I came here to see if that was a normal symptom.... Yup, I am not the only one with a little spiciness in my mood today. I feel much less cra cra now.

googoomom · April 2016

**Removed for TOU violation**

talkthewholetime · April 2016

If you don't like the internet, stay off the internet? This board is freakishly tame; I don't see one person who would warrant blocking.

Please bring out the real dramz. My llama is hungry.
Llama-corni repinned this from someone i dont know paul smith-rodriguez who has the best pinboards ever Funny hungry brainy progressive types should check him out

Llama-corni repinned this from someone i dont know paul smith-rodriguez who has the best pinboards ever Funny hungry brainy progressive types should check him out

jarethinafrock · April 2016

Should I be upset that I was the user who got blocked?

sweetlyuntied · April 2016

Criticism does not equal cattiness. And blocking someone because they make you feel "less than joyful" is immature and I would argue equally if not more catty then responding with a bit of snark.

sweetlyuntied · April 2016

Lol I'm totally gonna be blocked guys.

talkthewholetime · April 2016

Plus usually the snarky/sarcastic people are the funny and smart ones. Also conversations don't make sense when you are missing certain people's stuff. That's too much mental energy.

FiancB · April 2016

*Removed for ToU-Violation*

MissAmeliaPond · April 2016

Wow, I've been at work all day, and this thread didn't even get as close to out of hand as I thought it would.

Image: https://media.giphy.com/media/G8t4JHhHCo7bW/giphy.gif

talkthewholetime · April 2016

MissAmeliaPond said:

Wow, I've been at work all day, and this thread didn't even get as close to out of hand as I thought it would.

Right?!?! I showed up like 2 pages in hoping for some good shit. N16 is weak.

SRJR2013 · April 2016

This is strange. I thought we were all killing it at being super nice. Also I wish the bump gods wouldn't get butt hurt for a bit of flaming.....

LikeICantEven · April 2016

Am I the only one who rolled my eyes at the part where she says, "I ended up walking my journey basically alone because VigilentNaziPreggos goosestepped through my Daily Meal Plans...." or whatever?

Image: https://media.giphy.com/media/UGJRrDx0HzyBG/giphy.gif

I'll have a Powerpoint presentation shortly for you outlining how to Google search other pregnancy support groups. Definitely not TB for you.

yosemite2018 · April 2016

Just curious, who cares if people block others? Does it really matter? If they are missing important info or stuff doesn't make sense because they're missing half the convo, isn't that their problem? Why should that matter to anyone else?

sweetlyuntied · April 2016

@ash111916 it can get really confusing/annoying in more popular threads because someone might ask a question, another might answer, but if they've been blocked, other users might say exactly the same thing because they can't see the initial response. So if you haven't blocked anyone you get to see a whole group of people all saying the exact same thing at the exact same time.

We we had some issues with blocking in my last group. People almost always find out they've been blocked. It never ends well.

LikeICantEven · April 2016

ash111916 said:

Just curious, who cares if people block others? Does it really matter? If they are missing important info or stuff doesn't make sense because they're missing half the convo, isn't that their problem? Why should that matter to anyone else?

It goes against the spirit of community and this online culture which is pretty widely accepted. I don't see anyone bending over and letting mean girls have their way on this board thus far and I'm actually quite confidant that it will stay that way. What is to be risked by speaking your mind, you are ONLINE. It's saying what you want without fear of reprisal and maintaining anonymity. I mean, I get your point which sounds like, "you do you" and all that but it's not sensible to use that Block button freely.

It shows an intolerance there and a need to only surround yourself with people who share whatever opinion you have. I've said this before, but what the hell is the point of joining an online community if you can't leave yourself open to debate or polarizing opinion? What is to be gained from that?

I'm just going to leave this here:

Image: https://www.azquotes.com/picture-quotes/quote-let-me-never-fall-into-the-vulgar-mistake-of-dreaming-that-i-am-persecuted-whenever-ralph-waldo-emerson-36-20-83.jpg

FallenLeaves1990 · April 2016

I never block anyone because the snarky, know-it-alls are usually the funniest. I love witnessing some cringe worthy dramaz. I don't usually participate but that's what makes the bump exciting.
So far this board is very sweet and nice and lovely.

GreenEyedUnicorn · April 2016

People like the OP is what went wrong with TB awhile ago. Dude, if you can't fuckin hang with sarcasm, snark, and general dumb bitches being told about themselves, then join Glow or Baby center. Don't be a little bitch and sit and piss and moan and cry because someone hurt your delicate feels. Simple as that. Just leave.

Little+Tiny · April 2016

Wanna know the real way to deal with cattiness??

dance happy fried chicken food joy

Chcaggie1 · April 2016

talkthewholetime said:

Plus usually the snarky/sarcastic people are the funny and smart ones. Also conversations don't make sense when you are missing certain people's stuff. That's too much mental energy.

That's exactly what I was thinking... if I block someone and then they say something that sparks a bunch of conversation, I'll be totally lost! lol.

TwandaFTG · April 2016

Little+Tiny said:

Wanna know the real way to deal with cattiness??

You and fried chicken are synonymous now!

muybueno · April 2016

@Oakleypoozles I feel like you've abandoned us.

Oakleypoozles · April 2016

Well after internal conflict of whether to come back read the insane amount of posts and post or not you can see which side won.

To those that are curious, I had literally no inclination that my little technote would inspire backlash. Despite the thoughtful responses of why it did, it's still way above my head lol. As a few ladies have now mentioned though it did seem to conveniently corral a nice little group to ignore all at once. Perhaps also gave other quiet lurkers the ability to do the same.

That being said I absolutely encourage anyone to say anything that they want to as that is one of the God given rights of the internet and fortunately most places have a way to make those comments disappear aka ignore/block (alternately when not available thats' what scripts are for).

muybueno - When I think of something interesting maybe I'll do another technote. I'm grateful of the compliment. There is a program called SnagIt that makes it dead simple. In case you are interested. Really love that program!

Also to those of you who have privately messaged me and the couple of folks who posted their thank you's who didn't know how to use the ignore feature thank you for letting me know. I'm glad a couple of people found it useful! The force is now with you

muybueno · April 2016

Oakleypoozles said:

Well after internal conflict of whether to come back read the insane amount of posts and post or not you can see which side won.

To those that are curious, I had literally no inclination that my little technote would inspire backlash. Despite the thoughtful responses of why it did, it's still way above my head lol. As a few ladies have now mentioned though it did seem to conveniently corral a nice little group to ignore all at once. Perhaps also gave other quiet lurkers the ability to do the same.

That being said I absolutely encourage anyone to say anything that they want to as that is one of the God given rights of the internet and fortunately most places have a way to make those comments disappear aka ignore/block (alternately when not available thats' what scripts are for).

muybueno - When I think of something interesting maybe I'll do another technote. I'm grateful of the compliment. There is a program called SnagIt that makes it dead simple. In case you are interested. Really love that program!

Also to those of you who have privately messaged me and the couple of folks who posted their thank you's who didn't know how to use the ignore feature thank you for letting me know. I'm glad a couple of people found it useful! The force is now with you

QFP- both the original meaning and the new meaning bestowed upon us by @whaat

@Oakleypoozles - is it free software?

Oakleypoozles · April 2016

@muybueno No it's not a free software. I think it has a free trial like most things but it's a professional software. TechSmith sells for $49.99 alternately windows has a built in screenshot software ... it's called ummmm Snippit I think. It lacks the nice arrows and buttons but it works.

Snagit is like insanely convenient though because on a mac for example when you take a screenshot it saves it as a jpeg to your desktop so then you have to edit in like photoshop or something. On windows a screenshot just copies and then you have to paste it to some sort of editing software. In SnagIt it captures the exact piece you want in a self contained editor and it can be saved or just pasted from there.

Want a personalized experience?

How to handle cattiness and stay on the boards.

Re: How to handle cattiness and stay on the boards.

Choose Another Board

Search Boards