Headed home from vacation and traveling has stirred up several UO for me but I'll stick with the parenting one for here...
i get very annoyed by parents who use serving staff, other patrons, etc. as threats to get their own child to behave. On our flight here I heard two separate parent sets say to their child, "If you don't do X that flight attendant is going to come over and get you." Both times the flight attendant had to come over and basically scare the kids to follow directions. Another time I heard a parent tell a kid if they didn't sit and leave the next table alone the other patrons were going to "get" them. IMO your child should have a healthy level of respect (some would say fear idk if I want to say quite that though) so that if you say things in a particular tone or with a particular look on your face they know you mean business. After this trip I'm just annoyed by the number of parents I saw begging their kids to follow simple instructions or to be considerate of others.
Spiraling off this, I HATE when people use police officers to threaten kids to behave. It sends very mixed messages about "who are the people in your neighborhood" who kids can look to for help (anyone else remember that from Mister Roger's Neighborhood?). I even had a parent try to use me to threaten a kid to eat her lunch saying that if she didn't eat her sandwich "the nurse would get very mad and make you stay in for recess" WHHHHAAAA? First, no. Second, I need to be a safe person for the kids to come to so they open up about sensitive health topics. Don't make me the bad guy just because you don't know how to talk to your kid. Why would you want to plant the fear of servers, strangers, and public protectors like police, doctors and nurses?
I think this is why I feel weird about Elf on a Shelf. While I do like the idea of making a fun tradition of the Elf getting into to mischief, I don't like the idea of teaching my children to behave during Christmas time so that Santa's narc won't tell on them.
My UO since we're talking about TV shows. Darryl on Walking Dead is my favorite character, and I always said the show would be ruined if he left it. However, this season, I feel like his story arch isn't really doing him justice. I almost feel like maybe it's Darryl's "time," and I think I'm coming to terms with being okay with that. But I am so not ready for Mischonne to go anywhere!
Darryl is my favorite too! And I totally agree, I feel like they kind of abandoned his story arch and it bums me out. I'm not ready for it to be his time though. My H thinks Glen or Darryl will be done this season for sure and I'm so not ready for either of them to go! Carol on the other hand, she can go at any time. I honestly can't believe she's lasted this long. I do really like this season despite the lack of solid Darryl story lines.
They need more Darryl, less lovey dovey stuff. We want guts and gore, stop it with the kisses! But yes, Darryl and Glen can't go anywhere. But I am sure one of the main characters will be written out.
@ncm0328 How annoying!! You should make a t-shirt that says: 'We are a military family and my husband is currently serving your country. Now, either eff-off or bring me something to eat'
haha. I'm going to have this shirt made and sent to you.
Way off the UO topic but when I first went to my former OBGYN to talk about getting off the pill, the only question she asked me was "are you getting married?" And at the time we had no plans to get married. A throat punch would have been more appropriate but at the time I was so caught off guard that I just said "yes" to move the conversation along.
Ugh! When I was in college an OB kept pressuring me to get tested for herpes, which isn't a routine STD screening and I had no symptoms of. When I said no thank you, she said "well we need to make sure you're not spreading it around!" I understand that they are doctors, but jeez. Have some manners.
This kind of stuff kills me. A few years ago an OB said I should get a full STD test and I declined saying I had no symptoms. She asked if I had more than one sexual partner within the last few years and I said no, I've been married for five years. She laughed and said, "we're testing you. Husbands can't always be trusted..." I said no, left and never went back. Ridiculous!!
Here's mine: I'm actually dreading going on maternity leave. I can take up to 12 weeks off (8 weeks at full pay and 4 at half pay) and then work from home as long as I want, but I'm considering going back to work sooner. Even though my supervisor and I have discussed it all in detail and I know everything is going to be handled while I'm gone, the thought of being away from work that for long really stresses me out! And the probability of having my mom and MIL at my house everyday makes me want to scream already! DH gets 3 weeks of paid paternity leave, and he can use some of the PTO he has been banking for a while if he wants to take off longer after I go back to work. Maybe I'll feel differently and want the time off after LO gets here, but my career is such a huge part of who I am, and the thought of being away from it for months makes my stomach turn.
That's awesome you love your career and are eager to get back to it. But I would kill for a fraction of your benefits. So many of us don't have the luxury of staying home with our LO in the first month and have to return due to un-paid leave. Seriously is your company hiring!?
Well, it actually isn't as great as is sounds. My company's short term disability plan only covers 3 weeks at full pay (the other 5 I can take are my combined vacation, personal, holidays, and sick PTO) and 4 weeks at half pay (6 if a c-section). If I didn't use any of my PTO, I would only get 3 weeks at full pay, 4 (possibly 6) weeks at half pay, and the rest of the 12 weeks without pay. If I decide to use all of my vacation, personal, and floating holiday days, I'll have to request an advance on some of next year's PTO if we want to travel home for the holidays in December (which is our plan). That means less family vacation time next year. I know it's still more than most women in the U.S. get, and I'm grateful that I have these options (sorry if it came across otherwise). I just don't know that I'll be able to stand being at home for that long. I had a serious accident a year and a half ago where I was in the hospital for 2 weeks and unable to go back to work for about a month after that. I thought I was going to go stir crazy before my doctor cleared me to go back to work, and that was a lot less time than maternity leave. Maybe the time off will be different this time with a LO, but I'm still not looking forward to my leave.
I don't get people who tell their spouses how attractive other people are. I get being aware of their good lucks, but when I'm around people who sit there and tell their SO how hot this guy or girl was... I just don't understand. Why?
Why is it that most baby gear is so ugly? Pastel and baby animal EVERYTHING. No thank you. No way am I putting this pastel green swing with baby giraffes on it in my living room. Nope.
Famous last words....
Haha I've resigned myself to the fact that I do not have the time or energy to hunt down and review special items to match my style. I'm going with whatever at this point.
Why is it that most baby gear is so ugly? Pastel and baby animal EVERYTHING. No thank you. No way am I putting this pastel green swing with baby giraffes on it in my living room. Nope.
I KNOW! I hate this too. I really don't want my entire house to look like a Chuck E Cheese. ugh.
Way off the UO topic but when I first went to my former OBGYN to talk about getting off the pill, the only question she asked me was "are you getting married?" And at the time we had no plans to get married. A throat punch would have been more appropriate but at the time I was so caught off guard that I just said "yes" to move the conversation along.
Here's mine: I'm actually dreading going on maternity leave. I can take up to 12 weeks off (8 weeks at full pay and 4 at half pay) and then work from home as long as I want, but I'm considering going back to work sooner. Even though my supervisor and I have discussed it all in detail and I know everything is going to be handled while I'm gone, the thought of being away from work that for long really stresses me out! And the probability of having my mom and MIL at my house everyday makes me want to scream already! DH gets 3 weeks of paid paternity leave, and he can use some of the PTO he has been banking for a while if he wants to take off longer after I go back to work. Maybe I'll feel differently and want the time off after LO gets here, but my career is such a huge part of who I am, and the thought of being away from it for months makes my stomach turn.
That's awesome you love your career and are eager to get back to it. But I would kill for a fraction of your benefits. So many of us don't have the luxury of staying home with our LO in the first month and have to return due to un-paid leave. Seriously is your company hiring!?
I'm actually off from May through January. And there is NO WAY I can be gone for that long, so I hear ya, @lusitano9. Buuuut I don't want to come back to the office as once I'm back, people will think I'm available to do stuff that I don't want to do. So I'm going to work from home and we're going to get a nanny to come in the house.
My UO is that I think it's wishful thinking that people will be able to drink alcohol immediately after their babies are born. Newborns eating schedules can be so unpredictable, so if you want to BF it would be pretty hard to accurately determine a 2 hour window to have a drink before baby will want to nurse again. I realize this is unpopular, but whatever.
My UO is that I think it's wishful thinking that people will be able to drink alcohol immediately after their babies are born. Newborns eating schedules can be so unpredictable, so if you want to BF it would be pretty hard to accurately determine a 2 hour window to have a drink before baby will want to nurse again. I realize this is unpopular, but whatever.
My plan: feed, pump, drink. And by drink, I mean like 1/2 a Guiness because I haven't had alcohol in almost a year so I am probably quite the cheap date right now. That way, if Luna gets hungry while I am still processing the alcohol, Dada can take a turn giving her a bottle. Then, by the time she needs to nurse again, I will be ready to rock and roll.
I guess this is an UO but I am all for STD testing, even when you are asymptomatic!!!
So long as it's paid for by insurance, of course:)
But why not get tested? Most STDs can be transmitted by people who exhibit no symptoms (including herpes, which 1 in 4 women have). In fact, the numbers on that are higher, since 80% of humans have herpes simplex 1 (cold sores) and all it takes is an ill-timed oral sex session to make that genitally presented. And you don't have to acquire it via sex (i.e. Your husband can get it without philandering, just by sharing a drink with a friend or using a family member's towel).
I can think of no reason other than cost that you would not want to screen for all the things whenever the doctor is willing to order the tests.
My rings haven't fit for a few weeks now and I'm so stupidly afraid of people's judgment. It's like, even if I WASN'T married, who cares? How is it anyone's business? DH and I were out the other day and he had his ring on, and I said "I wonder if anyone thinks we're not married and I'm having an affair with a married man." At least I got a laugh out of that.
This is totally my DH and I. My rings haven't fit in a long time so I bought an $8 Walmart ring. I have totally been judged for each and every (4 total) pregnancies because of not wearing my rings. It's no ones business and people are ignorant.
LadySamLady: I'm with you on the Elf on The Shelf Deal. Why should parents have to make sure their kids are behaving by using a creepy elf to do it? That defies the whole point of Santa anyway. I mean I'm not going to force myself to make the elf look like they are moving all the time that's just way too much trouble. It's ridiculous! Kids should learn to be good on their own.
I'm with everyone on the not wearing rings issue - DH wears his everywhere and for the last month, I haven't been able to fit mine on (and clearly won't for awhile at this point). I was tired of people thinking that I was either a) not married or b) I was a mistress. So I bought a band from Target to suffice. But really, people need to mind their own business.
2nd - goes along with what @Charla1224 was saying. I'm so over watching kids run their parents and the house. When did we become a society where the KIDS rule? Have we become so afraid of disciplining our children that they can do whatever they want? My kids will know who the boss(es) are and what their consequences are. If they think they are stubborn, wait until they see how stubborn mom is. Who do you think you inherited that trait from?
My rings haven't fit for a few weeks now and I'm so stupidly afraid of people's judgment. It's like, even if I WASN'T married, who cares? How is it anyone's business? DH and I were out the other day and he had his ring on, and I said "I wonder if anyone thinks we're not married and I'm having an affair with a married man." At least I got a laugh out of that.
I officially outgrew my rings in the past 2 hours. I have dinner plans tonight with a friend, and might make her to go Macys with me 1st to by a fake. I am terrified of the side eye!
The only time a family needs to wear matching clothes is for photos and even then I prefer coordinating colors v. matching. It's one thing for a school group to wear matching shirts so they're easily able to identify one another, but your 4 person family does not need matching vacation shirts.
@LadySamLady I agree about Elf on the Shelf. I think the whole idea is stupid and I can't stand the multiple facebook posts I see by everyone when it's that time of year. Your kids should behave anyway!
@JessicaB0627 I agree. When people talk about drinking I just automatically assume that they don't plan on breastfeeding because I don't see how there would be time to drink in between BF.
@Charissadeats In regards to your Game of Thrones comment... GET OUT! :O I am appalled! I've read all the books and I think I've watched up to season 4?
Me: 31
DH: 29, SA - Great
Married: June 12,2011
TTC #1: 1/2014
Diagnosis: Hypothalamic Amenorrhea
Treatment: Clomid: 50mg, 100mg, 150mg - not successful and not monitored
My UO is that I think it's wishful thinking that people will be able to drink alcohol immediately after their babies are born. Newborns eating schedules can be so unpredictable, so if you want to BF it would be pretty hard to accurately determine a 2 hour window to have a drink before baby will want to nurse again. I realize this is unpopular, but whatever.
My plan: feed, pump, drink. And by drink, I mean like 1/2 a Guiness because I haven't had alcohol in almost a year so I am probably quite the cheap date right now. That way, if Luna gets hungry while I am still processing the alcohol, Dada can take a turn giving her a bottle. Then, by the time she needs to nurse again, I will be ready to rock and roll.
Ditto. And granted, I'm a FTM but the lactation consultant at our BF class was on board with this, and even suggested that once you get into a pattern, drinking a glass of wine or a half pint of a beer is totally doable. We need to stop this shame of women who are mother who have a drink with dinner or go out for cocktails with friends. My MIL was on about me being a wine-lover and now it will be YEARS until I can have wine again, and I was like Nope. But she does think I'm the worst (or second worst now that her younger son has a live-in gf who also is headstrong). Ah, family ...
My OU is pregnant couples not informing themselves of what it means to be pregnant. I have a bunch of pregnant friends/cousins/acquaintances right now, and so many of them won't read the books/ask their doctor questions/watch documentaries/join sites like the bump to get info on what's happening to their bodies/lives. In general, it's fine - be as informed as you want. But what tends to happen is I get a call at 4 am my time (because everyone forgets I'm in PST) about painful pelvises/brown discharge at 14 weeks/painful gas/etc etc etc and am like "This all could have been avoided - the panic,the phone call - if you just read that pregnancy book that was recommended ..." Why?
The only time a family needs to wear matching clothes is for photos and even then I prefer coordinating colors v. matching. It's one thing for a school group to wear matching shirts so they're easily able to identify one another, but your 4 person family does not need matching vacation shirts.
Omg this! We live near Disney so we go fairly often and we see this every time we go. I always feel bad for the kids/teens in the family bc I'm so sure they 'love' wearing those matching family shirts.
I'm with everyone on the not wearing rings issue - DH wears his everywhere and for the last month, I haven't been able to fit mine on (and clearly won't for awhile at this point). I was tired of people thinking that I was either a) not married or b) I was a mistress. So I bought a band from Target to suffice. But really, people need to mind their own business.
2nd - goes along with what @Charla1224 was saying. I'm so over watching kids run their parents and the house. When did we become a society where the KIDS rule? Have we become so afraid of disciplining our children that they can do whatever they want? My kids will know who the boss(es) are and what their consequences are. If they think they are stubborn, wait until they see how stubborn mom is. Who do you think you inherited that trait from?
*******QBF********* This times a million. I take the firm, but loving approach with my son and so far it's working beautifully. There is never, ever a time when he has thrown a tantrum and gotten his way and instead he has learned that there are times that things are appropriate and times they aren't/ times when he'll get what he wants because it's in line with what we want for him too/times when he's not going to get what he wants just because he wants it-- along with positive ways to ask for things and to ask for help.
As a teacher, it is so incredibly frustrating to call home to strategize around poor behavior/participation/attitude and be met with "well, he's almost an adult so I just let him do what he wants," or, "I don't know how to get her to stop doing that. I'm just hoping she'll stop on her own," or "he just yells at me when I try to correct him." etc. What?!? Even these kids who yell at their parents don't yell at me. How does this happen? It's so sad.
I'm with everyone on the not wearing rings issue - DH wears his everywhere and for the last month, I haven't been able to fit mine on (and clearly won't for awhile at this point). I was tired of people thinking that I was either a) not married or b) I was a mistress. So I bought a band from Target to suffice. But really, people need to mind their own business.
2nd - goes along with what @Charla1224 was saying. I'm so over watching kids run their parents and the house. When did we become a society where the KIDS rule? Have we become so afraid of disciplining our children that they can do whatever they want? My kids will know who the boss(es) are and what their consequences are. If they think they are stubborn, wait until they see how stubborn mom is. Who do you think you inherited that trait from?
DD is almost more stubborn than me. She definitely gives me a run for my money. This morning she threw a temper tantrum when I was dropping her off at school because she demanded that I turn on the sink water for her to rinse her hands off and couldn't be bothered to ask nicely. She flat out refused to say please just to be stubborn. I ended up having to grab her hands and rinse them off myself and left her throwing a fit on the floor.... It was awful!
@AmmyBelle No shaming from me! I fully plan on drinking beer after LO is born, just not until we can establish a good routine/schedule and possibly after I've been able to pump. Newborns are just very unpredictable and I would hate for mine to be hungry and upset because I had a drink and can't feed her again right away. I also have zero desire to have to pump and feed DD a bottle when we'll be working so hard at establishing a good breastfeeding relationship. I would rather wait at least a few weeks for that and not take chances.
2nd - goes along with what @Charla1224 was saying. I'm so over watching kids run their parents and the house. When did we become a society where the KIDS rule? Have we become so afraid of disciplining our children that they can do whatever they want? My kids will know who the boss(es) are and what their consequences are. If they think they are stubborn, wait until they see how stubborn mom is. Who do you think you inherited that trait from?
I feel like most people agree with this. Do you think we will see a trend of new parents being more strict? That is, if they can look up from the phone.
My OU is pregnant couples not informing themselves of what it means to be pregnant. I have a bunch of pregnant friends/cousins/acquaintances right now, and so many of them won't read the books/ask their doctor questions/watch documentaries/join sites like the bump to get info on what's happening to their bodies/lives. In general, it's fine - be as informed as you want. But what tends to happen is I get a call at 4 am my time (because everyone forgets I'm in PST) about painful pelvises/brown discharge at 14 weeks/painful gas/etc etc etc and am like "This all could have been avoided - the panic,the phone call - if you just read that pregnancy book that was recommended ..." Why?
Personally I don't understand why anyone would elect not to be informed about what was going to happen.
2nd - goes along with what @Charla1224 was saying. I'm so over watching kids run their parents and the house. When did we become a society where the KIDS rule? Have we become so afraid of disciplining our children that they can do whatever they want? My kids will know who the boss(es) are and what their consequences are. If they think they are stubborn, wait until they see how stubborn mom is. Who do you think you inherited that trait from?
I feel like most people agree with this. Do you think we will see a trend of new parents being more strict? That is, if they can look up from the phone.
God, I hope so. Though I've seen the polar opposite and it's not helpful either-- parents just shouting at their kids with no form of teaching or supporting; I don't want that to be the new standard either.
@JessicaB0627 - Oh no, I didn't mean to say you were shaming anyone, and I'm sorry if it came out that way. I meant society in general (my MIL in specific )
LOL @AdorkablePixie Sorry to disappoint! I will give Season 6 3 episodes before making the final call to stop watching Season 5 just did not do it for me (apart from 3 awesome scenes).
My UP is the radiology department where I'm having my biophysical profile done before my NST today. WTF is the point of having an appointment if you're going to make me sit in the lobby for 45 minutes after my appointment time? I work in healthcare at an office owned by the same company and we would get screamed at by patients if they waited this long. Not to mention that I have another appointment scheduled a half and hour later. When I told the receptionist that I had to pick my daughter up at 4 she told me to find someone else to do it. I told her that wasn't an option and she said well just go get her and bring her back. I asked what I was supposed to do with a 10 month old while I'm having an ultrasound and NST done? She told me she could help and walked away. I'm about to burn it down. I. Am. So. Pissed.
2nd - goes along with what @Charla1224 was saying. I'm so over watching kids run their parents and the house. When did we become a society where the KIDS rule? Have we become so afraid of disciplining our children that they can do whatever they want? My kids will know who the boss(es) are and what their consequences are. If they think they are stubborn, wait until they see how stubborn mom is. Who do you think you inherited that trait from?
I feel like most people agree with this. Do you think we will see a trend of new parents being more strict? That is, if they can look up from the phone.
I think you are spot on that it may be an issue of parents just not paying attention. We are all so consumed with media and technology we barely spend any real quality time with each other. I catch myself reaching for my phone while my son is quietly playing and have to stop and remind myself to be present. If I am not paying attention to him, how can I know what behaviors to reinforce or correct? Obviously, we all need time to disconnect and unwind and our kids can't be the center of our world, but do I really need to check FB during family time?
I can't tell you how many times I bring my son to the park or indoor play area and the kids are just running free while the parents are glued to their phones. Then, when a kid starts pushing another or takes away a toy or whatever, the parent snaps out of it and half-assedly calls "Stop it! If you don't behave we're leaving" and then goes right back to the phone. Seriously? I don't hover over my son and let him play without interfering unless I need to, but I try to be proactive and notice signs that he is getting frustrated or upset to help remind him of the calm-down tools he has like counting to 5, belly breaths, pretending to blow out candles etc. If he is being deliberately mean, I institute an instant and related consequence. Does it mean I am (gasp!) watching my kid and not letting him just run wild? Yes, and as a result he knows and trusts that I will consistently act as an authoritative parent which gives him structure and security and also holds him accountable in a developmentally appropriate way. It is hard work and there are times I would much rather just let it go, but then I imagine what a monster that could potentially create and that is motivation enough to keep on track.
I am honestly not sure if we will start to see more strict parenting, but I do think we are going to see a sharp swing away from helicopter parenting. Unfortunately, the trend may lean more towards lazy or laisse-faire parenting as the current "parenting generation" (what does that even mean?) is older millenials and this weird group of people born between 1980-1990 that are in-between generations, all of whom tend to be quite connected to technology and barely remember a time when you weren't instantly connected 24/7. As a result, parents may be more detached and consider themselves "free-range" parents, pretending to be hearkening back to the good ol' days when kids played out in the streets until dusk, when in reality they just don't want to have to give up constant access to social media and technology. That is worst case scenario. I am hopeful that parents will start to seriously look at what worked in past generations and adopt some of the more authoritative techniques so kids start to learn to respect their elders again. This meme sticks out in my head and terrifies me:
I believe we need to start giving our kids more credit and stop rushing in to "rescue" them, stop babying them, reinforce resiliency, and hold them accountable for their actions. Through a loving and firm touch, like @kbrands7 said, parents can be what they are meant to be: strong leaders who our children see as a safe haven for comfort and guidance to be good citizens of the world.
I think it's silly that the OJ trial has blown up again since the FX show came on and STILL the sympathy and focus isn't on Nicole and Ron. They DIED. OJ got off. Why do victims always get lost?
Been married since 2009. Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter) Several MCs DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)
My UO is that I think it's wishful thinking that people will be able to drink alcohol immediately after their babies are born. Newborns eating schedules can be so unpredictable, so if you want to BF it would be pretty hard to accurately determine a 2 hour window to have a drink before baby will want to nurse again. I realize this is unpopular, but whatever.
It's called drinking while nursing! If I can't do it one handed, I can just get one of these:
Idk if this is UO but I'm not a fan of children on leashes. I 100% understand if you have a child with special needs but otherwise they look silly.
I used to have this opinion. That changed in the day DD1 was 1.5 years old and wanted to walk in the store instead of ride and sprinted down the aisle and almost made it around a corner before I caught her, and then decided she was a big girl and didn't need to hold hands when walking next to us in parking lots.
I would rather have my kids be safe and have the leash and look silly then not have it as a backup to keep close and run of when I took my eyes of her for a second (and we did treat it as a backup, primary method was teaching good behavior). So just try to keep and open mind on leashes when kids become mobile (and there are some cute animal backpack styles where you hold onto the "tail")
Idk if this is UO but I'm not a fan of children on leashes. I 100% understand if you have a child with special needs but otherwise they look silly.
I completely disagree. I'll leave the leash thing alone as a whole but I don't think a child needs to be on a leash just because they have special needs. Those children are able to learn too.
I feel like most people agree with this. Do you think we will see a trend of new parents being more strict? That is, if they can look up from the phone.
Yes x34586965984 step away from your media regularly and make eye contact with your child. Then they will know they are cared for.
Mama to Three Girls: Twins born March 2014 at 26 weeks due to preterm labor and our 37weeker born May 9th, 2016!
My OU is pregnant couples not informing themselves of what it means to be pregnant. I have a bunch of pregnant friends/cousins/acquaintances right now, and so many of them won't read the books/ask their doctor questions/watch documentaries/join sites like the bump to get info on what's happening to their bodies/lives. In general, it's fine - be as informed as you want. But what tends to happen is I get a call at 4 am my time (because everyone forgets I'm in PST) about painful pelvises/brown discharge at 14 weeks/painful gas/etc etc etc and am like "This all could have been avoided - the panic,the phone call - if you just read that pregnancy book that was recommended ..." Why?
Personally I don't understand why anyone would elect not to be informed about what was going to happen.
@Aquinna82 lol, funny you say that because I know someone due this month that is like that. She refuses to learn anything about her pregnancy and told her husband to read stuff and tell her about it. Boggles my mind honestly.
Re: UO Thursday 3/31/16
DS: Born 5-17-16
DS: Born 5-17-16
lalalalalaa I can't hear you. I have 6.5 more weeks of blissful FTM ignorance.
So long as it's paid for by insurance, of course:)
But why not get tested? Most STDs can be transmitted by people who exhibit no symptoms (including herpes, which 1 in 4 women have). In fact, the numbers on that are higher, since 80% of humans have herpes simplex 1 (cold sores) and all it takes is an ill-timed oral sex session to make that genitally presented. And you don't have to acquire it via sex (i.e. Your husband can get it without philandering, just by sharing a drink with a friend or using a family member's towel).
I can think of no reason other than cost that you would not want to screen for all the things whenever the doctor is willing to order the tests.
Been married since 2009.
Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter)
Several MCs
DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)
2nd - goes along with what @Charla1224 was saying. I'm so over watching kids run their parents and the house. When did we become a society where the KIDS rule? Have we become so afraid of disciplining our children that they can do whatever they want? My kids will know who the boss(es) are and what their consequences are. If they think they are stubborn, wait until they see how stubborn mom is. Who do you think you inherited that trait from?
The only time a family needs to wear matching clothes is for photos and even then I prefer coordinating colors v. matching. It's one thing for a school group to wear matching shirts so they're easily able to identify one another, but your 4 person family does not need matching vacation shirts.
DD: 05/14/16
@LadySamLady I agree about Elf on the Shelf. I think the whole idea is stupid and I can't stand the multiple facebook posts I see by everyone when it's that time of year. Your kids should behave anyway!
@JessicaB0627 I agree. When people talk about drinking I just automatically assume that they don't plan on breastfeeding because I don't see how there would be time to drink in between BF.
@Charissadeats In regards to your Game of Thrones comment... GET OUT! :O I am appalled! I've read all the books and I think I've watched up to season 4?
Me: 31
DH: 29, SA - Great
Married: June 12,2011
TTC #1: 1/2014
Diagnosis: Hypothalamic Amenorrhea
Treatment: Clomid: 50mg, 100mg, 150mg - not successful and not monitored
Menopur 75ml (upped to 112.5ml), Ovidrel, & IUI IUI #1 8/31/2015
9/15/2015: BFP HCG - 400, 9/17/2015: HCG - 827, 9/21/2015 - HCG 3,327!My OU is pregnant couples not informing themselves of what it means to be pregnant. I have a bunch of pregnant friends/cousins/acquaintances right now, and so many of them won't read the books/ask their doctor questions/watch documentaries/join sites like the bump to get info on what's happening to their bodies/lives. In general, it's fine - be as informed as you want. But what tends to happen is I get a call at 4 am my time (because everyone forgets I'm in PST) about painful pelvises/brown discharge at 14 weeks/painful gas/etc etc etc and am like "This all could have been avoided - the panic,the phone call - if you just read that pregnancy book that was recommended ..." Why?
@AmmyBelle No shaming from me! I fully plan on drinking beer after LO is born, just not until we can establish a good routine/schedule and possibly after I've been able to pump. Newborns are just very unpredictable and I would hate for mine to be hungry and upset because I had a drink and can't feed her again right away. I also have zero desire to have to pump and feed DD a bottle when we'll be working so hard at establishing a good breastfeeding relationship. I would rather wait at least a few weeks for that and not take chances.
I can't tell you how many times I bring my son to the park or indoor play area and the kids are just running free while the parents are glued to their phones. Then, when a kid starts pushing another or takes away a toy or whatever, the parent snaps out of it and half-assedly calls "Stop it! If you don't behave we're leaving" and then goes right back to the phone. Seriously? I don't hover over my son and let him play without interfering unless I need to, but I try to be proactive and notice signs that he is getting frustrated or upset to help remind him of the calm-down tools he has like counting to 5, belly breaths, pretending to blow out candles etc. If he is being deliberately mean, I institute an instant and related consequence. Does it mean I am (gasp!) watching my kid and not letting him just run wild? Yes, and as a result he knows and trusts that I will consistently act as an authoritative parent which gives him structure and security and also holds him accountable in a developmentally appropriate way. It is hard work and there are times I would much rather just let it go, but then I imagine what a monster that could potentially create and that is motivation enough to keep on track.
I am honestly not sure if we will start to see more strict parenting, but I do think we are going to see a sharp swing away from helicopter parenting. Unfortunately, the trend may lean more towards lazy or laisse-faire parenting as the current "parenting generation" (what does that even mean?) is older millenials and this weird group of people born between 1980-1990 that are in-between generations, all of whom tend to be quite connected to technology and barely remember a time when you weren't instantly connected 24/7. As a result, parents may be more detached and consider themselves "free-range" parents, pretending to be hearkening back to the good ol' days when kids played out in the streets until dusk, when in reality they just don't want to have to give up constant access to social media and technology. That is worst case scenario. I am hopeful that parents will start to seriously look at what worked in past generations and adopt some of the more authoritative techniques so kids start to learn to respect their elders again. This meme sticks out in my head and terrifies me:
I believe we need to start giving our kids more credit and stop rushing in to "rescue" them, stop babying them, reinforce resiliency, and hold them accountable for their actions. Through a loving and firm touch, like @kbrands7 said, parents can be what they are meant to be: strong leaders who our children see as a safe haven for comfort and guidance to be good citizens of the world.
Been married since 2009.
Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter)
Several MCs
DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)
DD: 05/14/16
#klassy
I would rather have my kids be safe and have the leash and look silly then not have it as a backup to keep close and run of when I took my eyes of her for a second (and we did treat it as a backup, primary method was teaching good behavior). So just try to keep and open mind on leashes when kids become mobile (and there are some cute animal backpack styles where you hold onto the "tail")
Mama to Three Girls:
Twins born March 2014 at 26 weeks due to preterm labor
and our 37weeker born May 9th, 2016!