My ILs were supposed to arrive next Friday or Saturday...found out today they'll be here Monday night. I'm only 38 weeks and LO's arrival is not imminent.
MIL left me a voicemail freaking out because she couldn't get ahold of DH or I for all of an hour...on a Saturday morning. When I got back to her she said she had been "so worried." Um, I was running errands and DH is out of town without any cell service. It was ONE HOUR.
They're bringing their own mattress and had to ensure we have AC (it's Texas...of course we do) after previously promising to get a hotel. I don't like having house guests and I'm going to lose all of my hair before this kid even gets here. I may keep the birth secret for about 6 hours just to have a little time for DH and I to be a family of three before they come play hot potato with my first child.
Someone save me
Tell them no and send them to a hotel. That's intrusive and rude to show up early and expect to be accommodated at this time.
Our policy is that he deals with his family and I deal with mine. MIL is far more fragile than any of my family members so it would NOT go well for me to have this conversation with her. I thought she had told Mike about planning to come early, but when I texted him on his burner phone (that she doesn't have the number to) that they would be here Monday, his response was, "shit...ok." I had already acknowledged that they'd be here Monday. I'm guessing her husband won't spend the money to get a hotel room and I know her being here and meeting LO is important to Mike, and I'm not going to be the person that ruins that.
I also don't know them well enough to know how they'll be once she's born...SFIL will sit on the couch and watch westerns on the only TV we have (annoying but tolerable provided he doesn't speak) but will MIL be legitimately helpful or will she insist on holding baby all the time? The first would be appreciated, the latter would result in me hibernating in my room with LO in her bassinet.
I'm just hoping my water breaks tonight and I won't have to deal with not being comfortable in my home for weeks on end. I need a drink.
I know Hispanic men are generally fairly attached to their mothers, is he the type to not want to offend her in any way? Because even if that is the case, he should take your feelings into consideration. It's one thing for them to come and *meet* LO, but another entirely for them to plan to stay with you for a period of time if you don't want them there. She sounds manipulative to me if she decided to just jump up the visit a week without asking. How far away do they live?
Yes, he is very attached to her. She was a single mom after she divorced his crappy dad and they were really close, especially in his teen years. I think for her it's wanting to be as helpful as humanly possible because she really is the most kind woman I've ever met (unless you cross her family, then Mike tells me the Latina comes out). They live over 1,000 miles away and her husband is kind of controlling, so I think she's just doing the best she can to get whatever time with us that she can. And Mike didn't think twice about them moving up their arrival, so I guess this is normal for them.
@Knottie2891384 so I used to have a really rocky relationship with my mom and she had a tendency to get preachy about every choice I made in my life. We didn't talk for a long, long time. So, after we started talking again, if she started preaching or saying things she knew would upset me, I just said, "Mom, I love you but we have talked about this. I'm hanging up now, you can call me when you decide to respect me and my decisions." If she called back upset, I hung up and ignored any further calls for the day. It took a while, but she got the point after a few months and even started using the same treatment with me when I would try to argue some of my more liberal beliefs with her.
@jonesl12 that's actually really cool and I can't even imagine how meaningful the experience will be for your mom. And I'd be way more comfortable with my own mother seeing my Hoo-ha than my MIL, at least this time around. Plus, it's so much easier to be blunt with your own mother than with an in-law, no matter how good the relationship.
@AmadorRose I feel that the whole cultural thing is huge especially with regards to child rearing and involvement of parents. I'm not sure if it's just about sucking it up. You've been very open minded about the bond he has with his mom and the reliance he will have on her especially when you deploy. I think the big picture is worth the possible week of discomfort.
If my mom were alive, I'm pretty sure she would be right there in the delivery room with me. She would probably even insist on checking my postpartum stitches and give me terrible advice on how to raise the baby. But I would relish every moment of it.
edited cause of clumsy fingers pressing save too soon
Very disappointed in my body. How is it that I got so many contractions and labor scares while on nifedipine and bedrest? Now that I'm walking and stopped the pill it's like it never happened??? I was thinking that I would for sure go into labor by now. Even the nurse and doc thoughts so. I'm walking, going up and down stairs, bouncing, sex, and nipple stimulation....nothing. Had a quick session of false labor once and that's it!
The amount of people asking me how I'm feeling, for reminders of my due date, if there are any signs of labor, etc etc etc...it is really going to make me scream. I know they're good intentioned but I'm so ready for this kid to be here and every time I have to answer "just waiting" shatters my spirits a little. There is another "baby boom" right now on DHS side of the family (with DD there were 5 babies due in a 6 month span and we were the 2nd due and born, this time it's 5 baby's due in 7 months, we're 3rd in line and #2 was just born a few days ago). I also have two friends due (one due tomorrow, the other on Wednesday like me) who are both FTMS and I just feel like it will make me lose it if they have their kids before me. The competitiveness doesn't go away even when it's something I can't control! Baby girl, GET OUT!!!
yeah I am also over people treating me differently. Yesterday at a family gathering every time I went to the toilet when I came back everyone was like "everything ok? Are u ok?" What's the deal? also mum has decided I'm hormonal and she's not talking to me even though she's the one with the issues
@Knottie2891384 I had the same experience with my second child. I went into labor at 24 weeks, was in the hospital, sent home with all the drugs, had to go back twice to have labor stopped... But when I decided it was go time, nothing. It's so frustrating. The good news is, she eventually came out on her own, and one way or another, your baby will too!
Every time I look at the birth announcement thread and see there's a new April baby I get excited. However it's like hi... Who are you ?
How can a person leave the hospital 5 hours after birth? I always thought minimum stay was 24-48. Dependent on the hospital, obviously, but holy crap that's soon!
They can't make you stay I guess. And if you are feeling fine and baby is good then why not go home if you want to? It can't much different than those that have home births, right?
They can't make you stay I guess. And if you are feeling fine and baby is good then why not go home if you want to? It can't much different than those that have home births, right?
I feel like I'd be too exhausted and scared. I want to be taken care of while I can!
Every time I look at the birth announcement thread and see there's a new April baby I get excited. However it's like hi... Who are you ?
How can a person leave the hospital 5 hours after birth? I always thought minimum stay was 24-48. Dependent on the hospital, obviously, but holy crap that's soon!
You can go AMA, but if something was to go wrong (jaundice requiring additional stay, hemmoraghe, etc) with either you or baby, I don't know that insurance would pay for re-admission or anything care related associated with it.
I also wonder how insurance applies to people who have home births or other non-traditional options and then require hospitalization due to complications though? Hmm.
I am using a natural birthing center within a hospital. The typical stay is 24 hours, and that's what I did with DS - 24 hours from check in, and I left 15 hours after birth, mostly i stayed so long because I wanted a nap and lunch. I would go crazy in a hospital for 48 hours. Just like some moms want to go med - free and some want an epidural, I think moms have differing ideas on whether hospitals are restful or anxiety-inducing. Also, part of birthing at the center is a home visit with a nurse about 24 hours later. That's when we had the PKU test done.
One of my old good friends from jr high/high school is on a redemption episode of Guy's Grocery Games right now.. and even though I haven't seen him in a couple of years, I'm so stinking proud of him! He's an excellent chef, but on TV he is such a hot mess it makes me LOL.
I went to the Fair this evening and walked about a mile total. My mom kept texting me all stressed out "don't expedite labor! sit down!"
Sigh. I told her labor isn't just going to magically begin simply because I was walking, but she nagged me from an entire country away THE ENTIRE NIGHT. Parents sometimes.
Every time I look at the birth announcement thread and see there's a new April baby I get excited. However it's like hi... Who are you ?
Haha I feel like everyone will think that about me since I've mostly been lurking around here this whole pregnancy. Better late than never to start talking tho, aye?
DH is obssessed with TWD and was freaking out while it played and now he is pissed off that it ended on a cliff hanger...like always xD he's crackin me up
I go to bed every night hoping that I wake up in labor so I don't have to go to work. I was also desperately hoping that spit-shining the entire house in preparation for MIL's stay would do it but here I am...restless and definitely NOT laboring...
I shoveled and organized our garage. Hoping it would do something.... anything.... and nothing. I got nothing... I'm becoming so bummed like it's just never going to happen. Ugggggh
Yup every time LO starts to move so much or I feel the slightest cramp I begin to cheer him on "come on baby keep moving, break my water, give me done contractions!!! No just end up with more lightning crotch. If I haven't progress at today's appointment I might just give up on all these tricks.
I'm feeling so angry this morning. I am so ridiculously bitter that I haven't had this baby yet and am not in labor. With my first, I expected to go over. This time around, especially being so much more sure of my conception date and measuring spot on these whole 9/10 months, I swore I'd go early. And yes, I'm not due until Wednesday so I still could, but I feel like the only person in the world I know IRL that can't have a baby a little early. My mom was 1-3 weeks early with ALL of us so what the heck is going on with me? She and my dad are constantly asking if there's any progress. DH felt the need to tell me that his mom went late with all four of them...by over a week. I literally woke up crying this morning. I'm so beyond done and just want her here. I don't want to be induced but I know that will come up at my appt Thursday at 40+1. I got an infection during induction with DD1 and she spent 10 days in NICU. We aren't doing that again. These are the longest days ever.
I had a nightmare last night that I went to the dr and she pushed my due date back until JULY 6. I woke up sweating not knowing how I would manage another 3 months pregnant.
I had a nightmare last night that I went to the dr and she pushed my due date back until JULY 6. I woke up sweating not knowing how I would manage another 3 months pregnant.
I had a nightmare last night that I went to the dr and she pushed my due date back until JULY 6. I woke up sweating not knowing how I would manage another 3 months pregnant.
I go to bed every night hoping that I wake up in labor so I don't have to go to work. I was also desperately hoping that spit-shining the entire house in preparation for MIL's stay would do it but here I am...restless and definitely NOT laboring...
I was soooo hoping for this last night. I'm being induced tomorrow evening so I figured I'd work one more day (today). Why? I mean really, why? What's one damn day, ugh. At least it's casual day but it was not the smartest move. lol
I go to bed every night hoping that I wake up in labor so I don't have to go to work. I was also desperately hoping that spit-shining the entire house in preparation for MIL's stay would do it but here I am...restless and definitely NOT laboring...
I was soooo hoping for this last night. I'm being induced tomorrow evening so I figured I'd work one more day (today). Why? I mean really, why? What's one damn day, ugh. At least it's casual day but it was not the smartest move. lol
I guess at least you aren't sitting around at home hoping for something to happen?
I go to bed every night hoping that I wake up in labor so I don't have to go to work. I was also desperately hoping that spit-shining the entire house in preparation for MIL's stay would do it but here I am...restless and definitely NOT laboring...
I was soooo hoping for this last night. I'm being induced tomorrow evening so I figured I'd work one more day (today). Why? I mean really, why? What's one damn day, ugh. At least it's casual day but it was not the smartest move. lol
I guess at least you aren't sitting around at home hoping for something to happen?
Seriously. The waiting around sucks. You just get to watch everyone else have their babies before you. And since induction is not something I want, due to past experience, and won't be a concern for my doctors until 41 weeks minimum, I get to sit here realizing it may be another 1-2 WEEKS. The only benefit of not working is no nosy coworkers constantly asking me how I'm feeling. I text my friend who asked for an update that "Bitterness fills my soul". And I've now cried twice today. I'm such a joy...
lol @ the person who revived the "bling" thread from months ago to post her gigantic engagement ring and said "I would have been happy with a rubber band" hahahahhahahah yea right.
I just re-read the placenta thread on 3rd tri and I can't stop thinking about ways to prepare placenta for consumption. Steak? Filet? Placenta Parmesan?
I just re-read the placenta thread on 3rd tri and I can't stop thinking about ways to prepare placenta for consumption. Steak? Filet? Placenta Parmesan?
So 9 years ago today I had a baby that was placed for adoption because I was very young and in zero place to be a parent. I don't have any regrets about this decision and neither does my husband BUT I absolutely do not want this baby to share a birthday with him. It's was too emotional for me. Had a check at the Dr. And I'm 3.5 cm and baby is right there. I still have 3 weeks until my due date so I know that statistically I'm unlikely to go into labor today but every twinge and pain is freaking me out. I feel like I'm going to give myself a panic attack or something. Ugh. Idk why I'm saying this. Maybe just for some one to remind me that babies don't like to come out and I'll be okay.
Something's going to happen soon, I just know it. My husband is the one nesting. Today he cleaned AND organized our toddler's bedroom and it looks great! And now by HIS initiative we're going shopping tonight for new décor and furniture for her room! He also said he had a dream our baby boy was born on April 13. He had me go get us subway for lunch because he had a serious craving for a BMT. I swear you'd think that I put the baby in him. :P
@rebelone my husband was like that for one whole day, and today didn't lift a finger to clean despite his parents coming to stay with us. I really hope your husband's nesting bug lasts longer.
Re: **The Everything Random Thread for April Mamas**
@jonesl12 that's actually really cool and I can't even imagine how meaningful the experience will be for your mom. And I'd be way more comfortable with my own mother seeing my Hoo-ha than my MIL, at least this time around. Plus, it's so much easier to be blunt with your own mother than with an in-law, no matter how good the relationship.
If my mom were alive, I'm pretty sure she would be right there in the delivery room with me. She would probably even insist on checking my postpartum stitches and give me terrible advice on how to raise the baby. But I would relish every moment of it.
edited cause of clumsy fingers pressing save too soon
However it's like hi... Who are you ?
I also wonder how insurance applies to people who have home births or other non-traditional options and then require hospitalization due to complications though? Hmm.
Sigh. I told her labor isn't just going to magically begin simply because I was walking, but she nagged me from an entire country away THE ENTIRE NIGHT. Parents sometimes.
Something's going to happen soon, I just know it. My husband is the one nesting. Today he cleaned AND organized our toddler's bedroom and it looks great! And now by HIS initiative we're going shopping tonight for new décor and furniture for her room! He also said he had a dream our baby boy was born on April 13. He had me go get us subway for lunch because he had a serious craving for a BMT. I swear you'd think that I put the baby in him. :P
It's a boy! Grow baby, grow! EDD: 4/22/2016
It's a boy! Grow baby, grow! EDD: 4/22/2016
@wborders