Community› The Bump Month Clubs› October 2016 Moms
October 2016 Moms
New Discussion

**Trigger Warning** Controversial Topic, open at own discretion.

mothernorthmothernorth member
edited March 2016 in October 2016 Moms
This is not pregnancy related, just regular curiosity. Are any of you familiar with the term Rape Culture and what is going on in society and the media in relation to this? I have to write an essay over it in my English class and am just wondering what your opinions are on it. Do you believe we live in a "Rape Culture"?

I am already very familiar with the subject and just curious as to what many of you may have to say about it. I will not, and on a scholarly level CAN NOT use any of your ideas or opinions on the subject, just making intellectual/scholarly conversation.

**This post is not intended to offend or upset any readers, simply open up a controversial topic relevent to modern times and society for discussion**
Report Reply to Post

Re: **Trigger Warning** Controversial Topic, open at own discretion.

  • Loading the player...
  • LiterallyAmyLiterallyAmy member
    Yes, I most certainly believe that rape culture is a societal ill in this country (and in other countries, as well). I think there is an anti-women/girl mentality that is subtle at times, but extremely harmful and pervasive. This is a great article outlining the issue:  

    https://time.com/40110/rape-culture-is-real/

    There is also an Amy Schumer sketch called "Football Town Nights" that humorously explains a not so funny issue. 

    Good luck with the paper! 


    Report Reply
  • rebeccuhrebeccuh member
    edited March 2016
    Trigger warnings generally come *before* the triggering word/phrase/concept. 



    (ETA: but thanks for adding one in the first place.)

    BabyFruit Ticker


    Report Reply
  • mothernorthmothernorth member
    @Piperella I apologize if I upset you, that was not at all my intentions. I am asking opinions out of curiosity, I have already done my homework on the matter. Many topics are brought up on this board that are not pregnancy related, I don't  see this being any different other than having sensitive subject matter. You didn't  have to open and read this post, and are welcome to report me if you feel the need but I wish you would look at this more as an important topic that deserves discussiin, as we are all women on this board, and I value everybody's thoughts and opinions whether they agree or disagree. 

    @LiterallyAmy I actually have that article archived as a prospective source for my bibliography. My focus is more on whether or not children should be informed in schools along with sex education about sexual assault as a counter measure, our topics are broad in my class, I just wanted to hear some opinions from all of you, as some of my classmates believe there is NOT a rape culture.

    @kmalls I took your advice and edited a trigger warning, I didn't even think about the possibility that this may be too much for some. As an assault survivor, I am passionate about this topic and do not at all want to make ANYBODY uncomfortable.
    Report Reply
  • mothernorthmothernorth member
    @rebeccuh complete re-edit, thank you. I do apologize if my posting etiquette is sub-par, I approached this the same way it would have been approached at school or in the general media, I should have taken into the consideration the sensitivity of the readers on this board, but please ladies, do know I meant no harm. It wouldn't  have upset me, and I never for a moment thought it may be as touchy as it seems to be and I do apologize deeply and sincerely to all. I've  edited as best as I believe I can, but am open to further suggestions.
    Report Reply
  • br0co1iibr0co1ii member
    My opinion on this topic is that the only reason we have a "rape culture" is because we are more aware of it. It's been around forever, but it's being reported more now. Women are more apt to talk about it than in years past. We aren't afraid of the social implications that we would be "ruined." 

    I remember when I was a small child hearing my grandmother talk about a friend who was raped. I didn't understand what it was all about at the tender age of 5, but it existed then. It existed 100 years before then. It exists now. I wouldn't call it a "culture." I'd call it being aware that there are terrible things that happen every day, and sadly, I don't think discussions about it, no matter here, or in school, or in the media, will change that.
    Report Reply
  • dam0ne4dam0ne4 member

    I think it's gross how victims are usually not believed.  Our society is built to protect the rapist and that needs to change.  The latest case with Ke$ha is really sad.

    Also I welcome different topics to discuss, heavy or not. 

    DD Born 5.9.12

    MC March 2016@8.5w

    Expecting #2 4/30/17

    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker
    Report Reply
  • btsrc5btsrc5 member
    Are any of you familiar with the Rolling Stones article about UVA...and how,  after publishing it and destroying the reputation of the university and fraternities there,  it was proven completely false?  It is so infuriating to me because I feel like we take a step forward with trying to support rape victims and stop this culture,  and then something like this happens and makes it am even bigger battle for victims to be believed.  
    Married 08/18/07
    BFP 02/15/11 EDD 10/27/11 Born at 35w3d on 09/25/11 
    BFP 10/13/12 EDD 06/25/13 Born at 37w0d on 06/04/13

    BFP 12/11/15 EDD 08/23/16 Early miscarriage

    BFP 02/02/16 EDD 10/16/16

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker 


    BabyFetus Ticker


    Report Reply
  • booksandicecreambooksandicecream member
    I actually think this topic is VERY pertinent for us! Approximately half of us will have a little girl in October, and the other half of us will have a little boy. It is our responsibility as parents to teach our children about sexuality and respect. Rape culture is very real, though of course we experience it to different extents based on our personal circumstances. Teaching sexuality and respect at a young age is the most effective way to combat these issues without offending anyone. This method is in place in Northern Europe and has been successful.
    DS#1 born 05 October 2016
    DS#2  due 25 April 2019
    Report Reply
  • mothernorthmothernorth member
    @dam0ne4 I agree, although from what I looked up on Ke$ha's case, and this was a few weeks ago and may have changed, all she wanted to do was be released from her contract with her label and producer and wasn't even trying to have him prosecuted. It's a sad and strange state of affairs.

    @btsrc5 Yes ma'am as a matter of fact I am familiar with that as well. As an assault victim (I am only disclosing this about myself to show my stance on my views, not trying to get anybody to sympathize or share there experiences if God forbid they have any), I believe the concept of rape culture has been blown out of proportion. It reminds me of an interview I saw with Morgan Freeman about Black History Month: He believes there should be no Black History month because it does not encourage ending racism, discrimination, or anything like that. It just points out that these people being studied were black. This is what happened to black people. In essence, keeping blacks and whites segregated by pointing out all of this is black instead of just focusing on the history and achievements of PEOPLE. He was asked how do think we can end racism? He said "Stop talking about it." I feel similar about this topic. Obviously it isn't  going to literally stop being discussed, but over blowing does absolutely no good. I don't blame society and our culture for being raped. I blame the person who raped me, and I haven't  met a soul who condones that kind of behavior.

    @books&ice cream I have read up on that and am actually using it as an example in my paper. I agree that children should be taught about sexuality and respect, especially at young ages. In a manner appropriate for them of course, but it would benefit so much to know what is and isn't acceptable to do, and equally as important have done to them. I think it could help children recognize when they are in a bad situation and be able to tell adults about it more effectively.
    It's  sad that so many states are not even required to teach basic sex ed at all, much less even touch on sexuality and respect.

    Also, I think the concept of "teach men not to rape, don't  teach women how to not get raped" is ridiculous. First of all, not all men are sexual deviant rapists. Secondly, some women ARE. It is foolish for ANYBODY to not take measures to protect themselves, woman, man, child, anybody, no matter what, from ANY form of assualt. The fact is, bad people are going to be bad people regardless of who is being taught what. I believe this concept is just causing increasing tension between the genders that we don't need. I take rape and sexual assault very very seriously, but I take offense that my father, my brothers, my sons, all the good men I know are lumped into a potential rapist category just for being men, and that all the women I know are just being looked at as potential victims just for being women. As so similar to racism, this only further segregates the sexes and causes feelings of inequality. Rape is a horrible horrible thing, but I believe pretty much everybody knows that rape is wrong. That isn't  going to stop an actual rapist from raping, and people need to protect themselves from actual rapists. Not from the other sex as a whole. Gender roles are a plague that are being inadvertently stirred up in this issue causing even more trouble than the facts on sexual assault themselves.

    I almost completely lost any desire to even check this thread, thank you to those of you who contributed and made conversation!
    Report Reply
  • FiancBFiancB member
    edited March 2016
    *lurker*

    I will attempt to hold back the rest of my rage, but I will say I think it would be helpful if you edited your post to say TW-rape at the top. Not necessarily the title, but just to give people an idea of what exactly they're getting into when they click the post.

    I don't think you're really posting for intellectual discussion but to get on a soapbox with your own ideas, but anyway. At least do that, because I know you're not going to change your mind. 

    Edited to fix because I didn't realize title was changed already. 
    LFAF/Nov 16 challenge: Bad TV moms that shouldn't be celebrated


    BFP #1 10/30/15 MMC found 11/30/15 D&C 12/11/15 EDD 7/9/16
    healing comes in waves, and maybe today the wave hits the rocks and that’s ok, that’s ok, darling. you are still healing, you are still healing- Ijeoma Umebinyuo, be gentle with yourself
    BFP #2  3/21   EDD 11/28/16
    Report Reply
  • mothernorthmothernorth member
    @LadyMillil Well then it's a good thing I never asked anybody to discuss rape. I ONLY inquired about "Rape Culture", if somebody doesn't  understand what "rape culture" is and confuses this with a "rape" post that isn't  my fault. The title says "open at own discretion " and has a TW. Nobody has to open this thread, read it, or comment on it. If they are 'naturally curious' and do so, they had AMPLE warning that there may be uncomfortable content, that was THEIR CHOICE, and I am not responsible for that. I don't know what more I can do to. If you or anybody else is POTENTIALLY sensitive to a controversial  topic, don't  open a thread that is clearly labeled so. I'm not making any more accommodations for anybody or apologizing. This subject is all over the news and media, if some people can't handle this post, which was put far more delicately than many other places it could be found, then I don't  think they can't handle society or the real world. That's my opinion. If you're  going to open this, take the time to read what it says, and read the comments before you jump on the hyper-sensitivity bandwagon. 
    Report Reply
  • mothernorthmothernorth member
    I am no longer responding to any of you attacking the subject matter. If you have an issue, report me. All I asked for was opinions on the subject. Do you think we do? Do you think we don't?  I'm not asking for your stories. I made every accommodation I can aside from completely deleting the thread, which I'm  not going to do.

    I am entitled to my views just like all of you are entitled to yours. I am NOT going to debate your opinions, I respect your opinions on the topic. No matter what they may be. I will not however sit here a bicker about what should or shouldn't  be posted, or how to go about doing so to cater to the needs of whomever it is at the time when I have already done everything I can to do so.
    Report Reply
  • BumpAdminBumpAdmin admin

    This thread has been closed to new posts as a result of the shift in topic. To find threads regarding (this topic), we encourage you to use the search function to post to an active thread or start a new discussion.

    Please note that we remove posts that do not follow our guidelines and will issue warnings to users who violate the Terms of Use.

    To review our Community guidelines, please visit The Bump Guidelines pinned at the top of this board. Thank you.

    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"