I just need to vent. This afternoon is my Grandpa's 80th Birthday party, and My Mom, Aunts, and cousins will all be there. One Cousin in particular who can't have kids will be there and I'm worried about what her reaction to seeing me visibly showing will be. I love her like a sister but she is very withdrawn when anyone in the family is pregnant, however, she's not like that with her friends. I'm just worried about how she'll react... I hate for her to feel like it's being rubbed in her face, because it's totally not... I have refrained from posting any kind of updates, other than our announcement, on social media, so as to shield her from it as much as possible, because I know it's difficult for her.
My DH also will not be going to the party, because several of my family members aren't overly fond of the fact that he's a SAHD. That is a decision that we made 11 years ago when our babysitter (my stepmom) gave us the shaft and we decided that my job was better, with benefits and higher pay, so if one of us was going to stay home, it would be him. I feel like this will just add fuel to the fire, making them think he's just lazy, and give them more to talk about. It's almost to the point where I dread going, but you never know, this may be my Grandpa's last birthday, and I would hate to miss it.
I would appreciate thoughts and prayers you all could spare today for strength to go and enjoy the celebration for what it is, and not worry about other peoples opinions.
Edited because I posted before I was done typing.
Re: NBR Family Anxiety
As far as your DH being a SAHD, props to both of you for making the choice that was right for your family. I'd say stick it to 'em and wear that decision like a flag. If it seems like he's hiding, it makes it look like you think there's something wrong with your decision. You are doing what's best for your kids. No one can argue with that!
If you're husband being a SAHD works for you guys, don't worry about what they think! It's a decision you both made a long time ago. Good for you guys.
BFP #2 8/22/12 | EDD 5/5/13 | DS1 born 5/9/13
BFP #3 4/25/15 | EDD 1/7/16 | MMC 7/2/15 @ 13w1d | D&E 7/8/15
BFP #4 12/9/15 | EDD 8/22/16 | DS2 born 5/18/16 at 26w2d
Just keep swimming.
My dh is also a SAHD. It made sense for us just as it did for you. I feel the same way about our families judging but try to just let it roll off my shoulders. My MIL asks why I am not a SAHM? Why would that be any different? Because he is a man and I am a woman? We do what is best for our family.
I know they say the family dynamic is changing, and more dads are staying at home, but why is there still such a stigma attached to it? It's so frustrating!