@jlgriff11 That's so weird how we can watch the same thing and get totally different impressions! I love JessFam and I thought her twin birth went really well. In the end she's overcome with joy from birthing her twins naturally and tells the doctor he's the best doctor ever. The worst part was what an unsupportive dipsh!t her boyfriend at the time was. She does tend to be a screamer, but only a little and only during active labor. Even in her natural water birth for her last baby she starts to want to scream in the end and the midwife has to remind her to breathe deeply and stay in control. If you take any kind of natural birthing classes, having a "scream-free labor" is a major theme. If you're serious about trying to stay collected and not scream there are loads of resources and people who agree with you
@silvers626I usually agree, but i did see a lady driving a flashy BMW one day with the plate "NoPreNup" and I laughed for a long time
@shanparadise depending on the situation, you could go 10000% passive aggressive. "Oh, yea, I totally get it, there is probably no way you could handle twins but luckily I have a great husband and family so I'm really excited! ::: huge smile :::: " .
Or just lie and say "all my friends have twins and it's great!" or "I was a nanny for triplets so this will be like vacation!" or my fave (for really any pregnancy comment): "OMG No one has EVER said that to me before! Like ever!! You've given me something new to think about..."
@jlgriff11 That's so weird how we can watch the same thing and get totally different impressions! I love JessFam and I thought her twin birth went really well. In the end she's overcome with joy from birthing her twins naturally and tells the doctor he's the best doctor ever. The worst part was what an unsupportive dipsh!t her boyfriend at the time was. She does tend to be a screamer, but only a little and only during active labor. Even in her natural water birth for her last baby she starts to want to scream in the end and the midwife has to remind her to breathe deeply and stay in control. If you take any kind of natural birthing classes, having a "scream-free labor" is a major theme. If you're serious about trying to stay collected and not scream there are loads of resources and people who agree with you
That's true- I love JessFam too and while I think she was super ridiculous strong and awesome, for me, maybe it's a bit of a family thing? My mom is very stoic. She's not prone to hysterics and we're sort of expected to behave in a certain way. For instance, you know how some mom's start to cry and buy their children diamonds when they start their periods? I was just like "Hey I started" and she's like "Okay, here are some pads." and that was it. So maybe I just personally think I have this idea that I want to be cool and calm. I may break the mold and let out a few curse words myself.
I hate Starbucks coffee. It tastes like burnt beans, covered in sugar. If someone says its the greatest coffee, I instantly assume they have never had decent flavored coffee before.
There, I said it.
YES! STARBUCKS IS GARBAGE. Their espresso drinks are doable in a caffeine apocalypse life or death desperation kind of way. But their regular coffee is so gross, I'd rather give up coffee all together than drink it. Luckily the PNW has way better coffee to choose from just about anywhere you look.
Oh totally @stellaluna14! I am in SW WA, so I have the best of both worlds...good WA coffee and like five minutes from good Portland, OR coffee. My favorite is Brewed Awakenings (I think they only have like 5-6 locations). Their coffee is amaze-balls. And luckily, there is one that is three minutes from my house, and another that is five minutes from my house, and another that is five minutes from my work.
It is fun to see the Asian tours go absolutely nuts in the Seattle Starbucks though, grabbing bags and bags of the stuff. Sure, get your picture taken there, and maybe order something so you can say that you have had a drink at the original Starbucks.....but depleting the shelves of all of the bags of nasty coffee......nope, nope, nope!
I wasn't a screamer last time. I did swear a bunch, though. And the nurses kept telling me, "stop pushing with your face." I wish I could have pushed with my face.
My "UO" apparently is that we decided to keep the names we have picked out to ourselves. Nobody is on board with this, except my mom and MIL. Everyone else keeps badgering us to tell them. Also, I am starting to hate when strangers ask me how my pregnancy is going and (this really pisses me off) "do you know what it is yet?"
I'm not terrified to have twins. So many people tell me I have no idea what I'm in for, but really I'm not going to know any different. I'm a FTM, so going from no babies to any babies is a big life change. I'm just getting two at once. Also, the comments of "I just don't know how you're going to swing it" are not helpful or even close to warranted. DH and I have this. We have the support of our families and friends and a pretty rock solid relationship under that. Twins are not the end of the world. We're actually really excited.
@shanparadise I nanny twins, and I can tell you that it is hell. HOWEVER, I will also add that it is hell because of the parents, not because there are two of them. Previous to having my DD, I nannied four children for five years (ages 5, 2, 2, and 1). I could take those kids anywhere, I never had any issues with them, and I had a blast with them......because we were all consistent with them. Strict, but fun. If we said no jumping on the couch today, it meant no jumping on the couch any day. It didn't mean no jumping on the couch today, but feel free to jump on the couch tomorrow to stay out of my hair. We were also big on the "you get what you get, and you don't throw a fit", saying in the house. If you throw a fit, whatever it was that you were just given, was taken away. They knew that if they didn't behave, then fun things were going to be taken away...there were no empty threats. That was five years ago, and those kids are still awesome-sauce.
The ones I have now, completely different. Mom gives them what they want, just to shut them up. Dad is stricter, but also coddles them after they get in trouble. Rules are constantly changing. You cannot take them anywhere or do anything with them, because they throw massive fits in the store, take off running, wont listen, etc. Empty threats are thrown left and right. Those three year olds run that household, and have been running it since they were walking. Their own friends don't even want to hang out with them, because their kids are such a handful. I can't do anything fun with them, because I know wherever we go or whatever we do....I will have to leave because of their behavior.
So I am a firm believer that you can handle as many kids as you want, as long as you are going to parent them and not let them run around like tzsmainian devils, and give them structure. I found my four nanny kids, just as much work as I find my DD (and she is super easy!)......its not that much work if you are on top of things, and start teaching them from the get-go.
@jlgriff11 Really? My grandma took me to the corner store and asked the attendant where their "sanitary napkins" were and then after I died of embarrassment we never spoke of it again. My mom had been leaving tampons around the house for a while and had given one demonstration when I was still a few years away from needing it, so I just quietly took care of my business.
That said, I also learned that some kids get divorce presents or divorce vacations because their parents feel bad for "breaking up the family." We got zilch. Except a house with less parental screaming.
@xc1148 Yes! I'm totally using that next time a specific person says it. She's said it about four times now since I've told her about the twins. I also want to remind her how I, having no children, was the only person who could soothe her screaming baby a few months ago. I must know nothing about children.
@Nerdchild I was watching Jess Fam's video on naturally birthing her twins and she was like "SHIT FUCK FUCK WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO ME" and screamed the whole time. I was traumatized.
The funny thing was I woke up this morning and for some random reason started thinking about Sex And The City when Miranda gives birth and how she's all just "lemme strain like I'm taking a dump" for 5 seconds and poof, there's a baby. Watching births in movies and shows is awkward enough- I don't think I can bring myself to watch a real life video of it... its not that I'm in denial or anything but I'm not sure I need to see it to prepare for it... I'm hoping I'm not a screamer!!
@jlgriff11 Really? My grandma took me to the corner store and asked the attendant where their "sanitary napkins" were and then after I died of embarrassment we never spoke of it again. My mom had been leaving tampons around the house for a while and had given one demonstration when I was still a few years away from needing it, so I just quietly took care of my business.
That said, I also learned that some kids get divorce presents or divorce vacations because their parents feel bad for "breaking up the family." We got zilch. Except a house with less parental screaming.
Divorce vacations? I never got a divorce vacation and my mom was divorced twice! I'm going to have a long talk with her today.
My "UO" apparently is that we decided to keep the names we have picked out to ourselves. Nobody is on board with this, except my mom and MIL. Everyone else keeps badgering us to tell them. Also, I am starting to hate when strangers ask me how my pregnancy is going and (this really pisses me off) "do you know what it is yet?"
@jlgriff11 wait what?! Girls get diamonds when they start their period? My mom must have missed that memo.
Have yall seen the video on FB about where the little girl lies about starting and puts glitter nail polish on a pad and then the mom throws a party. Funny as hell.
@PinkLady2015 I wouldn't recommend it. Even though you get the painful end of the deal, you also don't have to see anything you don't want to see. Being blissfully ignorant about what is happening is better, in my opinion. I was in the delivery room with my sister about 9 months after I gave birth and it was WAY more traumatizing to see it from that angle. Also, you just never know what your body will do when you experience an insane amount of pain. Don't fight it, just do what the doctors and nurses tell you and you'll be okay. If you scream, who cares? It's all normal, really.
I agree with @ButterMyBiscuit - definitely prepare for the pain and learn pain management techniques, breathing techniques, etc., but there's no need to be embarrassed if you react differently than you expect. The nurses and doctors have seen it all and I don't think it phases them. Some women are relatively quiet during labour, some scream, some are hyper focused on themselves and go all internal, some yell and swear at their husband/doctor/nurse. To be perfectly honest I don't even really remember most of what I said and did during labour. DH told me some of the funny things I said while high on the gas, and I know there was a period during my induction where I was checked by a tiny little doctor with tiny little fingers, and I definitely let out a cry/scream when she had to shove basically her whole hand up there in order to reach my cervix, but I don't feel embarrassed about any of it. I kind of laugh about the induction scream because there was a woman in the room across the hall just starting her induction, and I probably traumatized that poor lady, but damn that shit hurt. No shame.
With my son I screamed at the doctor to hurry the F up...I was ready to push and he was taking his sweet time to get ready hahahahaha. I dont think youll care what you say at that point you just want it out and now. LOL
@juliagulia38 Yes! I saw a girl on YT (a wanna be beauty guru- she was maybe 15?) who was talking about what she was taking with her on vacation to Greece and mentioned her diamond earrings she got from her parents when she started her period to celebrate.
I think the Bella Band type stuff are seriously overrated. When I started outgrowing my normal clothing, I bought three from Target - one in each color - and I never even opened the second two after opening the first and hating it.
So there's this boy. He kinda stole my heart. He calls me "Mom"
@sami1784 I agree! It makes me feel like an overstuffed burrito with a band aid in the middle. I'm wearing one right now feeling ridiculously uncomfortable.
Yesss, the Bella Band totally sucks for its intended purpose! But I remember wearing it towards the end in addition to my maternity pants, for extra support. Maybe keep one around?
I hated my bella band for its intended purpose - I found it didn't stay in place and I spent all day adjusting it. What I did love it for was after the baby was born and I bought some easy access v-neck nursing shirts. They were a bit low cut for my comfort though so I wore the bella band as a bandeau (spelling?) top under the shirt to give me a bit extra coverage but still be able to pull out of the way easily to nurse.
Twins are an amazing blessing. Will it be hard? Yes, but parenting in general is hard. Just from lurking you seem like you have your 'ish' together and you're going to do a great job. My good friend is a mom of twins and her advice for other twin moms is to live and die by a schedule; if one wakes up to feed, wake the other up, etc. Good luck, I'm sure you've got this.
My UO: When random people, like in supermarkets or at the mall, decide to tell you how horrifying their birth was. Most follow this up with an , "I'm sure you'll be fine." I'm left feeling like a victim in a drive by shooting (and I've already been through one birth!)
@dobbyssock That is an awesome idea! I hadn't thought of that one. With "the girls" ever expanding and turning some of my normal shirts into slightly inappropriate for work, I may have to steal that idea!
So there's this boy. He kinda stole my heart. He calls me "Mom"
People don't like the fact that I do not want photos of my kid posted on social media that aren't posted by myself or DH. Yes, social media is great to keep in contact with people, but I don't need to see 20 pics a day of your baby. Also, I'm leery of the security on FB, and have seen stories of pics getting hijacked for memes and people passing them off as their own. I want to ask people, including family, not to post pictures on social media. My husband thinks that's unreasonable, and we can't control what people post. I say if we ask them not to and they still do it, then they are disrespectful assholes who can go fuck themselves. I'm probably paranoid, but just something I feel strongly about.
People don't like the fact that I do not want photos of my kid posted on social media that aren't posted by myself or DH. Yes, social media is great to keep in contact with people, but I don't need to see 20 pics a day of your baby. Also, I'm leery of the security on FB, and have seen stories of pics getting hijacked for memes and people passing them off as their own. I want to ask people, including family, not to post pictures on social media. My husband thinks that's unreasonable, and we can't control what people post. I say if we ask them not to and they still do it, then they are disrespectful assholes who can go fuck themselves. I'm probably paranoid, but just something I feel strongly about.
Yeah, some people just don't understand. I'm actually taking a step further - In addition to asking other people not to post any photos, I plan not to post any myself either. I completely understand parents who do, I'm by no means judging them. I just feel like it's not fair to my kid because they have no say in the matter. If when they're older (like, way older) they want to post photos on social media then that's their decision. Once you post something o the internet - it's there forever. There's no erasing it. Until then I don't feel it's my place to place un-deletable content on them for folks to see. I'm sure this is partially because I work in the technology field and I know all of the security holes and risks.
People don't like the fact that I do not want photos of my kid posted on social media that aren't posted by myself or DH. Yes, social media is great to keep in contact with people, but I don't need to see 20 pics a day of your baby. Also, I'm leery of the security on FB, and have seen stories of pics getting hijacked for memes and people passing them off as their own. I want to ask people, including family, not to post pictures on social media. My husband thinks that's unreasonable, and we can't control what people post. I say if we ask them not to and they still do it, then they are disrespectful assholes who can go fuck themselves. I'm probably paranoid, but just something I feel strongly about.
I'm leery of over-exposure of kids online too. I started a private IG account and my fb profile is locked way down. I am thinking of making some requests of friends/family about how they share photos of this baby. I'm sure some people will think that's extreme, but that's okay. Basically nothing about parenting goes without comment from someone.
My UO is based on my current mood and not my philosophical approach to education. Today I believe your child should have to be toilet trained before being allowed to start kindergarten.
I JUST cleaned dried up child shit hidden under a toy box in my classroom. It was disgusting. I am annoyed.
Tomorrow I will go back to my love of all children and diehard belief that they deserve FAPE despite their ability but today.... UGH!
Re: UO Thursday
July BMB May Signature Challenge
@shanparadise depending on the situation, you could go 10000% passive aggressive. "Oh, yea, I totally get it, there is probably no way you could handle twins but luckily I have a great husband and family so I'm really excited! ::: huge smile :::: " .
Or just lie and say "all my friends have twins and it's great!" or "I was a nanny for triplets so this will be like vacation!" or my fave (for really any pregnancy comment): "OMG No one has EVER said that to me before! Like ever!! You've given me something new to think about..."
It is fun to see the Asian tours go absolutely nuts in the Seattle Starbucks though, grabbing bags and bags of the stuff. Sure, get your picture taken there, and maybe order something so you can say that you have had a drink at the original Starbucks.....but depleting the shelves of all of the bags of nasty coffee......nope, nope, nope!
The ones I have now, completely different. Mom gives them what they want, just to shut them up. Dad is stricter, but also coddles them after they get in trouble. Rules are constantly changing. You cannot take them anywhere or do anything with them, because they throw massive fits in the store, take off running, wont listen, etc. Empty threats are thrown left and right. Those three year olds run that household, and have been running it since they were walking. Their own friends don't even want to hang out with them, because their kids are such a handful. I can't do anything fun with them, because I know wherever we go or whatever we do....I will have to leave because of their behavior.
So I am a firm believer that you can handle as many kids as you want, as long as you are going to parent them and not let them run around like tzsmainian devils, and give them structure. I found my four nanny kids, just as much work as I find my DD (and she is super easy!)......its not that much work if you are on top of things, and start teaching them from the get-go.
You got this!
ahhhh gotcha! Yes, that makes sense
July16 JULY siggy challenge
July BMB May Signature Challenge
The funny thing was I woke up this morning and for some random reason started thinking about Sex And The City when Miranda gives birth and how she's all just "lemme strain like I'm taking a dump" for 5 seconds and poof, there's a baby. Watching births in movies and shows is awkward enough- I don't think I can bring myself to watch a real life video of it... its not that I'm in denial or anything but I'm not sure I need to see it to prepare for it... I'm hoping I'm not a screamer!!
Have yall seen the video on FB about where the little girl lies about starting and puts glitter nail polish on a pad and then the mom throws a party. Funny as hell.
July BMB May Signature Challenge
So there's this boy. He kinda stole my heart. He calls me "Mom"
Voted "Mom of the Year" 2012 Sweetpea Mom Awards
July16 JULY siggy challenge
Married: October 23, 2010
DS: 8/7/2013
#2 EDD: 6/29/2016, C Section: 6/22/2016
My UO: When random people, like in supermarkets or at the mall, decide to tell you how horrifying their birth was. Most follow this up with an , "I'm sure you'll be fine." I'm left feeling like a victim in a drive by shooting (and I've already been through one birth!)
Married: October 23, 2010
DS: 8/7/2013
#2 EDD: 6/29/2016, C Section: 6/22/2016
So there's this boy. He kinda stole my heart. He calls me "Mom"
Voted "Mom of the Year" 2012 Sweetpea Mom Awards
Married: May 16th 2015
I JUST cleaned dried up child shit hidden under a toy box in my classroom. It was disgusting. I am annoyed.
Tomorrow I will go back to my love of all children and diehard belief that they deserve FAPE despite their ability but today.... UGH!