Oh! I thought of another one! Apparently I have lots of questions
Can we talk about the first post partum poop? I have been told it is horrific. Can I do anything to prepare for it?
It's just the fear of it. This sounds ridiculous...but I was sitting there like a child afraid to poop haha... but like PP have stated, they give you a stool softener which helps. It's seriously not bad.
I will say that cleaning yourself that first day was also kind of scary lol
So I'm nervous about the bleeding after birth. I'm having a medically necessitated c section, but I know bleeding happens regardless of how the baby is delivered. I've seen it described as a heavy period, but what exactly should I expect? And what supplies should I have on hand to cope? I'm completely horrified at the thought of having a heavy flow with only a pad.
I had a C-section and actually bled quite a bit afterwards. I think it was because I couldn't breastfeed because I know that BFing helps your uterus go back to normal a lot quicker. I did pass a few pretty substantial clots and (possible TMI) was pretty glad I had sufficiently groomed myself beforehand (nothing like having your husband shave you because you can't reach and/or see...we achieved a new creepy intimate level in our relationship that day). But really, it was nothing a super duper pad couldn't handle. I wouldn't suggest wearing khakis and sitting on a white couch the day after, but nothing really to worry about.
Pp poop - wasn't bad at all. It actually happened pretty quickly after birth and it was nbd. Don't feel embarrassed to ask your nurse for stool softeners if you need them, though!
Timing of epi - I was induced, had a very long labor. About 14 hours into labor my contractions were horrible (thanks Pitocin) and I was only 2cm when I got my epi. I had no problem progressing after that and had a vaginal birth about 10 hours after the epi was placed.
But it as you all know every woman and every birth is different. All you can do is go into L&ad with an open mind....it's good to do your research and obtain all the knowledge that you can, but sometimes you've just got to go by your gut and do what you think is necessary.
Oh! I thought of another one! Apparently I have lots of questions
Can we talk about the first post partum poop? I have been told it is horrific. Can I do anything to prepare for it?
It's just the fear of it. This sounds ridiculous...but I was sitting there like a child afraid to poop haha... but like PP have stated, they give you a stool softener which helps. It's seriously not bad.
I will say that cleaning yourself that first day was also kind of scary lol
YES @kami09 Again I had a CS, so the clean up was terrifying for a different reason (trying to figure out how to bend without splitting open) so I found that the peri bottle was my best friend! I loved that thing. I even considered getting a bidet because it was an eye-opening experience how awesome it is to be gently cleaned by a stream of delightfully warm water instead of wiping with even a baby wipe.
@ AnastasiaBeaverhausen09 I had a c-section,as I remember having diarrhea for a day after, rather than being constipated like I had feared. So everybody is different! If you aren't at least passing gas by day2 PP, let your OB or nurse know, maybe you need to drink more, eat some prunes, or walk the halls. Use the stools softeners twice a day, and use a suppository if you get uncomfortable. It is temporary!
Mama to Three Girls: Twins born March 2014 at 26 weeks due to preterm labor and our 37weeker born May 9th, 2016!
This is baby #6 for me and me and my husband's 2nd child. I had 4 sons before I was married. We have a daughter and boss jr. A boy. With my oldest I had a cesarean(emergency). Found out at the last minute had pre-eclampsia, which was very scary; but the baby and I both survived. He was 7LBS. 7oz. I was put on lacis to help all the fluid come off my body and out of my system. I recovered very well. I give all the glory to the Lord above to a great medical team. My 2nd pregnancy was a success. I had set up for a repeat cesarean and went into full blown labor a week before it was due. My first natural birth along with a epidural. Epidurals is something that I will never use again, because you can't feel anything from waist down. It totally takes away from the natural birthing experience. It confuses you how to push proficiently. Third son I had a push button for pain meds as needed to deal with the contractions but left me and son very drowsy after delivery. Fourth son, no meds til last minute, they felt sorry for me, I guess.... By me being hypertension with him by my 8th month, it caused my blood pressure to shoot up sky high. I was put on high blood pressure after delivery for 6months til I lost the weight by constant workouts and strict diet. Fifth child - daughter, no meds at all. No time for it. No complications at all. I have never broke water at home. I have always gone to hospital right before bloody show. Contractions were always about 10 minutes apart, only with my 3rd child I went to hospital right after blowing day show. I was 7cm. So a non medicated delivery will be your safest method. Trust the Lord.
Oh! I thought of another one! Apparently I have lots of questions
Can we talk about the first post partum poop? I have been told it is horrific. Can I do anything to prepare for it?
Take the stool softener and take miralax for a few days (yes both). Drink tons of water. And don't be me and pretend you don't have to poop...the pressure I put myself through was worse than just going.
For any moms who went med-free: Do you have any tips to share or laboring positions that really helped you? I've been reading about using breathing methods to concentrate and get through the pain but I'm worried I'll forget it all in labor. Any tips to share would be appreciated.
No specific magical positions, but keep moving. I walked around (partially because I was so frustrated with what to do), bent over a ball, and stuff like that. Some people say they loved sitting on the toilet, but I couldn't sit still for the life of me!
One thing I'm wondering about is the necessity of a private room. I am delivering at big NYC hospital and while of course the L&D rooms are private, the recovery rooms aren't. They do have private rooms but they're first come first serve and cost an extra $525 per night that is not covered by insurance. I really feel like I do not need a private room and since it can't be guaranteed it feels like something that isn't worth spending too much time thinking about, never mind the cost. My H and family members think I'm crazy, that I will want a private room when the time comes and should be sure to request it the moment we get to the hospital so that we'll be at the top of the list when/if one becomes available. STMs - what do you think?
@LadySamLady this was actually one of my concerns last time, which sounds insane but it is what it is. I can tell you from my experience it was worth it but I don't think it's a huge problem if you don't get one simply because you can't control the outcome. I had a tiny private room and I was really grateful for it, but I could have just as easily not gotten one.
They asked me at registration my preference, and again right after DS was born because, as the nurse said "the only way you get on the list is if you have a baby in your arms". It really comes down to timing and luck. NYU also offers semi-private which is a regular room with two beds so your DH can use that bed, but if they're slammed you give up the extra bed and are refunded. Honestly the only plus of the private room was my own shower. Worst case scenario if you don't want to shuffle down the hall just wait until you get home.
Btw it would be hilarious if we end up at NYU at the same time.
Eta: it's a really busy hospital, I had to wait 3 hours for a labor room and got my epidural in triage, but don't let that dissuade you from making a preference known if you have one. It might work out!
Do you plan to have SO/DH above your head or below during labor?
I can't answer about the actual birth because I didn't make it that far last time (for a cs-ection, they position your H right next to you head. He held my hand even though I couldn't feel it)-- if I do this time, I'll leave it up to him. During labor he was all over the place: he massaged my feet and put counter-pressure on my lower back, he took pictures like a tourist, he got ice chips for me and snacks for him, he was in charge of the music on the ipad, and he helped me kick my family out when they came to the hospital sooner than was planned and sat in my room while I was in labor still.
@Bltbear82 Thank you for the insight!! It would be crazy if we both end up there at the same time! My H will probably decide about the private room when we get to the hospital since I feel so whatever about it, but great point about the bathroom issue. The one worry I have is that my H won't be allowed to stay the night in a shared room which would change my mind. Honestly, I sort of just don't want to get caught up in worrying about it since it is so out of my control and they are such a busy hospital that it very well may not be possible anyway. Did you have to bribe someone or did the timing work out just right for you?
Do you plan to have SO/DH above your head or below during labor?
Definitely above! The only time he peeked below when when the doctor said DD was crowning at which point he got very emotional. You'll need him right here with you to hold your hand and help you to stay focused.
Do you plan to have SO/DH above your head or below during labor?
Lol this is kindof funny... My hubby is very curious in nature (very endearing and annoying at the same time), and I should've taken that into consideration when I was thinking about how labour would go with DD. And I guess to be honest I didn't really think about where he would be in the room much, I was too worried about all the other stuff.
So when it was time to push, hubby was right in there. But to be honest I didn't care. I had a fever, I was exhausted and I just wanted that baby out of me. I guess it was helpful in that he was able to tell me if I was pushing correctly (I had an epidural but was still able to move around and walk with assistance) and tell me if I was making any progress. Obviously when it was time for the doctor to come in, I think maybe he came up by my head then went and cut the cord when she was out. But that part is a little fuzzy for me
@kp90 FTM, so no prior experience with giving birth here...but let me tell you, my husband is a nurse whose specialty is trauma care. The last hospital he worked at before he started his current job was essentially our county hospital - it's the best one in our area with the highest level of trauma care, but it's also the busiest one in a heavily populated area. So it wasn't unusual that sometimes he'd have to take over a case because the hospital was super slammed and the situation was imminent.
Anyway, to get to my point...he's had to deliver a couple of babies during his time there. Been there, done that, seen way grosser stuff during other cases than I will probably present during delivery, which will definitely come in handy if an emergency comes up and I have to deliver in the car or something.
That at all being said, I still want him far north of the equator. Regardless of what he's seen with patients and the fact that he doesn't care about the gross bits, I'm still pretty modest about a lot of stuff. So while, yes, I am aware that most if not all of my dignity will be going out the window that day...I still really want him above my head, lol.
@LadySamLady feel free to ask anything, I was lucky to have a friend that delivered there before me so I asked her a million questions.
Last time I checked (in 2014) partners could stay overnight in any type of room. Granted it's not as comfortable as a private room where they get a cot, but there should be a chair that reclines back to a "bed" and he should be able to stay with you. Funny you ask about bribing! I did actually bring a box of chocolate with the intention of bribing the nurses but I never ended up needing to use it. DS was born at 2:58 am so I think it's slower in the middle of the night for room turnover and I just lucked out.
@kami09 I am really freaked out about the IV. I have never had one but since everyone is talking about how painful they are, I have completely freaked myself out about it!
@kami09 I am really freaked out about the IV. I have never had one but since everyone is talking about how painful they are, I have completely freaked myself out about it!
It hurts because there's no meat there I kind of forget if everyone needs one? I'm guessing if you go med free, you don't need one. Someone correct me if I'm wrong.
I think my IV didn't hurt that much going in because I had worse pain going on simultaneously so I was distracted, but my hand was bruised and sore after they took it out. I remember being annoyed by the fetal monitors, the straps kept rubbing against me the wrong way but it was really cool watching them move it down as the baby descended and tracking his heart rate.
And whoever said the peri bottle is amazing, totally agree. The first time the nurse showed me I was like umm what? But try not using it just once and you'll sing a different tune.
@kami09 I am really freaked out about the IV. I have never had one but since everyone is talking about how painful they are, I have completely freaked myself out about it!
Mostly, it's awkward to get used to since they tend to run it in the top of the hand/wrist area. Mine didn't hurt going in, but I accidentally yanked it a few times which was unpleasant. You can have them tape it up though to make that less of a problem.
@kami09 I am really freaked out about the IV. I have never had one but since everyone is talking about how painful they are, I have completely freaked myself out about it!
Apparently I have smaller than normal veins in my hands so they stuck me a million times before moving to the other hand...which they stuck another million. & then they would like ram it in and jiggle it trying to get it to work...unpleasant. But you'll probably be fine!
@kami09 I am really freaked out about the IV. I have never had one but since everyone is talking about how painful they are, I have completely freaked myself out about it!
It hurts because there's no meat there I kind of forget if everyone needs one? I'm guessing if you go med free, you don't need one. Someone correct me if I'm wrong.
Unfortunately, most hospital policies require an IV even for med free births. In the very least they require a hep lock (even lots of birthing centers require a hep lock). This is a bummer, I'm planning to deliver med free at a birthing center if all goes well and my birthing center requires a hep lock. At least I can get my fluids by mouth this way. The way I see it, the amount of pain I'll be in, getting poked will be the least of my worries.
Can they place the IV mid-arm where they usually draw blood from instead of the hand wrist area? I'm extremely needle phobic (feeling really sick right now after reading all the epidural/IV posts...) and I really don't think I could deal with it in my hand/wrist area. I had an IV twice before this (years ago) and it was always mid-arm because my veins are good there and I always made them tape it and wrap it out so it doesn't accidentally pull out. I'm really debating if I should do the epidural or not. I'm so terrified of the needle and having the catheter in my back. I'm thinking about going med-free just because of my phobia, but I'm really scared of the pain too. I just don't know which is worse..
So I'm nervous about the bleeding after birth. I'm having a medically necessitated c section, but I know bleeding happens regardless of how the baby is delivered. I've seen it described as a heavy period, but what exactly should I expect? And what supplies should I have on hand to cope? I'm completely horrified at the thought of having a heavy flow with only a pad.
You'll bleed the more active you are. In fact, my doctor said if my flow gets heavier then I'm overdoing it. It was not a significant part of my recovery so honestly it's not that bad. I LOVED Always Overnight pads. They were comfy and I felt confident in their coverage.
Been married since 2009. Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter) Several MCs DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)
@Sienna516 once you have/are holding your baby, it's much easier to have the IV in your hand than the arm. After I accidentally yanked mine a bit, they taped it up my forearm during labor and it helped. This time, I'll ask for that to be done from the beginning.
One thing I'm wondering about is the necessity of a private room. I am delivering at big NYC hospital and while of course the L&D rooms are private, the recovery rooms aren't. They do have private rooms but they're first come first serve and cost an extra $525 per night that is not covered by insurance. I really feel like I do not need a private room and since it can't be guaranteed it feels like something that isn't worth spending too much time thinking about, never mind the cost. My H and family members think I'm crazy, that I will want a private room when the time comes and should be sure to request it the moment we get to the hospital so that we'll be at the top of the list when/if one becomes available. STMs - what do you think?
Yeah.... I would want a private room TBH.
Been married since 2009. Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter) Several MCs DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)
IV? Do you guys mean that drip that sticks in your hand? I had to have one twice, and it never bothered me (not birth related, obviously. But i would not worry at all. A baby has to come out down there. Don't worry about the IV:-) It will only be a needle prick and it'll be over really quickly, I am sure.
Oh! I thought of another one! Apparently I have lots of questions
Can we talk about the first post partum poop? I have been told it is horrific. Can I do anything to prepare for it?
I never understood this, however, I think it's a vaginal birth thing. I had a c section though and mine was fine.
I had a vaginal birth and mine was fine too.
Also @yogahh I think they sometimes do the IV in the wrist and sometimes in the hand. Mine was in my wrist right above/beside my wrist bone. The needle was big and I'm pretty sure I still have a scar from it, but they put mine in before my induction so I'm assuming it's less noticeable when you're in active labor.
But either way, there are much worse things about labor and you will be fine!
@kami09 I am really freaked out about the IV. I have never had one but since everyone is talking about how painful they are, I have completely freaked myself out about it!
It hurts because there's no meat there I kind of forget if everyone needs one? I'm guessing if you go med free, you don't need one. Someone correct me if I'm wrong.
Unfortunately, most hospital policies require an IV even for med free births. In the very least they require a hep lock (even lots of birthing centers require a hep lock). This is a bummer, I'm planning to deliver med free at a birthing center if all goes well and my birthing center requires a hep lock. At least I can get my fluids by mouth this way. The way I see it, the amount of pain I'll be in, getting poked will be the least of my worries.
So what DID you guys wear while in labor? I have visions of flapping hospital johnnys.
Hospital gown. The whole process is messy and I didn't want to mess up my own stuff. Everyone is going to see everything anyway. When I got up to walk around for a bit, I just threw a robe on.
A little background, My first and third were med free and with my second I had an epidural, all vaginal births. I'm not sure what will happen with the fourth, but always go into labor with the mindset that I will go as long as I can without meds, but open to meds when needed.
My water broke with number two and three so I had pitocin with each of those.
Knowing that every labor and ever women is different, this is what worked for me for number one and three (med free). I moved around and changed position frequently. I breathed slowly and deeply, but didn't follow any "method." I didn't get into bed until it was time to push. I didn't talk to my DH or anyone and didn't want anyone to touch me, I just sort of went into my own little world?? The first was born three hours after arriving at the hospital and 45 minutes of pushing. With my third my water broke, was 36 hours of labor in the hospital, and 30 minutes of pushing. inhad pitocin and a sunny side up/back labor baby. Mind over matter??
My hospital automatically gives you a stool softener and I never turned it down. I don't recall any issue with the first poop.
With my second, I had an epidural. My water broke, 24 hours in the hospital, and the nurse gave me a now or never option for an epidural so I got one. It didn't hurt and I couldn't feel anything. I pushed for about 10 minutes and my DH "caught" our daughter. He's not squeamish at all?!
Great questions! Wish I had a board like this with my first!!
One thing I'm wondering about is the necessity of a private room. I am delivering at big NYC hospital and while of course the L&D rooms are private, the recovery rooms aren't. They do have private rooms but they're first come first serve and cost an extra $525 per night that is not covered by insurance. I really feel like I do not need a private room and since it can't be guaranteed it feels like something that isn't worth spending too much time thinking about, never mind the cost. My H and family members think I'm crazy, that I will want a private room when the time comes and should be sure to request it the moment we get to the hospital so that we'll be at the top of the list when/if one becomes available. STMs - what do you think?
I only have experience with a private room...that being said, I wouldn't want to share a room! I had at least 10 visitors by the second day, I was tired, emotional (read: crying a lot), struggling with nursing, and wouldn't want to share a bathroom with another mom who also just gave birth. Honestly there is a lot of blood, and like one of the PP's mentioned you may have your first post-baby poop there.. I don't know maybe it's just me, but having the privacy to cry, or try to poop in peace was so worth it!
Plus there were lots of special moments that I look back on, that would be really different if there was a curtain dividing my family and the next family over.
So what DID you guys wear while in labor? I have visions of flapping hospital johnnys.
I wore my hospital gown, until my fever made me start to over heat, so I ditched my gown and ended up just wearing my lululemon sports bra for the majority of the time I was pushing.
The issue for me with the first PP poop was I was worried about my stitches (episomity with #1 and small tear with #2) and I ended up with hemroids from pushing that made painful to go. Tucks pads became my close friend for that first week along with the peri bottle.
For labor I was in a hospital gown that was made for nursing moms, the back was open and had slits in the front for easy access. I changed into PJs once my IVs were disconnected and I could take a shower.
Re: Ask a STM anything about child birth!
I will say that cleaning yourself that first day was also kind of scary lol
Timing of epi - I was induced, had a very long labor. About 14 hours into labor my contractions were horrible (thanks Pitocin) and I was only 2cm when I got my epi. I had no problem progressing after that and had a vaginal birth about 10 hours after the epi was placed.
But it as you all know every woman and every birth is different. All you can do is go into L&ad with an open mind....it's good to do your research and obtain all the knowledge that you can, but sometimes you've just got to go by your gut and do what you think is necessary.
Use the stools softeners twice a day, and use a suppository if you get uncomfortable. It is temporary!
Mama to Three Girls:
Twins born March 2014 at 26 weeks due to preterm labor
and our 37weeker born May 9th, 2016!
They asked me at registration my preference, and again right after DS was born because, as the nurse said "the only way you get on the list is if you have a baby in your arms". It really comes down to timing and luck. NYU also offers semi-private which is a regular room with two beds so your DH can use that bed, but if they're slammed you give up the extra bed and are refunded. Honestly the only plus of the private room was my own shower. Worst case scenario if you don't want to shuffle down the hall just wait until you get home.
Btw it would be hilarious if we end up at NYU at the same time.
Eta: it's a really busy hospital, I had to wait 3 hours for a labor room and got my epidural in triage, but don't let that dissuade you from making a preference known if you have one. It might work out!
Do you plan to have SO/DH above your head or below during labor?
So when it was time to push, hubby was right in there. But to be honest I didn't care. I had a fever, I was exhausted and I just wanted that baby out of me. I guess it was helpful in that he was able to tell me if I was pushing correctly (I had an epidural but was still able to move around and walk with assistance) and tell me if I was making any progress. Obviously when it was time for the doctor to come in, I think maybe he came up by my head then went and cut the cord when she was out. But that part is a little fuzzy for me
Anyway, to get to my point...he's had to deliver a couple of babies during his time there. Been there, done that, seen way grosser stuff during other cases than I will probably present during delivery, which will definitely come in handy if an emergency comes up and I have to deliver in the car or something.
That at all being said, I still want him far north of the equator. Regardless of what he's seen with patients and the fact that he doesn't care about the gross bits, I'm still pretty modest about a lot of stuff. So while, yes, I am aware that most if not all of my dignity will be going out the window that day...I still really want him above my head, lol.
Last time I checked (in 2014) partners could stay overnight in any type of room. Granted it's not as comfortable as a private room where they get a cot, but there should be a chair that reclines back to a "bed" and he should be able to stay with you. Funny you ask about bribing! I did actually bring a box of chocolate with the intention of bribing the nurses but I never ended up needing to use it. DS was born at 2:58 am so I think it's slower in the middle of the night for room turnover and I just lucked out.
And whoever said the peri bottle is amazing, totally agree. The first time the nurse showed me I was like umm what? But try not using it just once and you'll sing a different tune.
I'm really debating if I should do the epidural or not. I'm so terrified of the needle and having the catheter in my back. I'm thinking about going med-free just because of my phobia, but I'm really scared of the pain too. I just don't know which is worse..
Been married since 2009.
Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter)
Several MCs
DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)
Been married since 2009.
Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter)
Several MCs
DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)
Been married since 2009.
Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter)
Several MCs
DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)
I had to have one twice, and it never bothered me (not birth related, obviously. But i would not worry at all. A baby has to come out down there. Don't worry about the IV:-)
It will only be a needle prick and it'll be over really quickly, I am sure.
Also @yogahh I think they sometimes do the IV in the wrist and sometimes in the hand. Mine was in my wrist right above/beside my wrist bone. The needle was big and I'm pretty sure I still have a scar from it, but they put mine in before my induction so I'm assuming it's less noticeable when you're in active labor.
But either way, there are much worse things about labor and you will be fine!
My water broke with number two and three so I had pitocin with each of those.
Knowing that every labor and ever women is different, this is what worked for me for number one and three (med free). I moved around and changed position frequently. I breathed slowly and deeply, but didn't follow any "method." I didn't get into bed until it was time to push. I didn't talk to my DH or anyone and didn't want anyone to touch me, I just sort of went into my own little world?? The first was born three hours after arriving at the hospital and 45 minutes of pushing. With my third my water broke, was 36 hours of labor in the hospital, and 30 minutes of pushing. inhad pitocin and a sunny side up/back labor baby. Mind over matter??
My hospital automatically gives you a stool softener and I never turned it down. I don't recall any issue with the first poop.
With my second, I had an epidural. My water broke, 24 hours in the hospital, and the nurse gave me a now or never option for an epidural so I got one. It didn't hurt and I couldn't feel anything. I pushed for about 10 minutes and my DH "caught" our daughter. He's not squeamish at all?!
Great questions! Wish I had a board like this with my first!!
Plus there were lots of special moments that I look back on, that would be really different if there was a curtain dividing my family and the next family over.
My 2 cents, pay extra for the private room.
For labor I was in a hospital gown that was made for nursing moms, the back was open and had slits in the front for easy access. I changed into PJs once my IVs were disconnected and I could take a shower.