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April 2016 Moms
Bubbles3592
member
Unmedicated Birth Support Thread
Bubbles3592
member
I haven't seen any other boards dedicated to all natural labor on here, but maybe I missed something? I've opted for a non-medicated, low/no intervention birth. It's hard to find the support for it. All my friends had epidurals. My doctor didn't sound too enthused when we talked about it, and she specified that I need to research techniques and information that go along with a non-medicated birth. I figure it would be nice for us to have a support group on here so we can help each other out. I'm signing up for a swimming membership at the rec center so that I can spend the next eight weeks getting certain muscles prepared, and I want to try other techniques such as yoga ball meditation. Feel free to ask questions and post personal stories or helpful articles. If you want, post your birth plan ideas on how you can successfully make it through a non-medicated labor.
Re: Unmedicated Birth Support Thread
I searched the words "natural" and "non-medicated" for the April 2016 community and all the threads it gave me were non-related to an actual labor support group. Maybe I missed it or maybe it is under a different name, but I haven't seen it. Although I have been having trouble navigating The Bump as of late.
I am hoping for an unmedicated birth. I've read up on the Bradley method, will have a doula with me for the birth, and will be going to a birth class this weekend that will go over some techniques for helping with that. My doctor is also on board with unmedicated birth. I would feel pretty uncomfortable having her as my doctor if she was not. That said, I'm going to see how things go and if I decide I need some pain medication, or if I end up needing a c-section, I will roll with the punches and be ok. What I don't want to do is get my heart set on a specific plan and then freak out when things don't go accordingly.
I am hoping for an unmedicated birth, partially by choice and partially because I may not physically be able to have an epidural. It's a personal choice that I know may or may not come to fruition. I know baby may have its own plan and my goal is happy, healthy, baby and happy, healthy mom.
Like other posters have said, however, I don't want to get too attached to a particular outcome and make things harder on myself post-birth for not getting "what I wanted." If I get an epidural, it will be because that is what was the best decision at the time. That being said, I REALLY don't want a C-section so I'm doing everything I feel I can to avoid it.
Oh I didn't think about that. I changed the thread name to unmedicated.
Side note: I read an article yesterday that said the husband being in the room makes things more difficult for mom during labor and delivery. I'm gonna go find it and try to post it.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-559913/A-obstetrician-men-NEVER-birth-child.html
2) If supporting me during birth causes DH to up and leave, good riddance. I understand that there is a very real condition in which men can no longer be aroused after watching their wives give birth but I can't rectify that with the man I married. If he wants to stay at my head that's fine, but I couldn't have married a man who couldn't be there for me when I need him.
But like I had with DD, I labored fine until my husband showed up after breakfast. Then I couldn't concentrate or focus at all and I know it was because of him even though he said and did everything we planned to help me. However, I know not all women are like that, but I figured it was interesting enough to read lol
A friend's mom is a midwife (not mine though) and she said with all the deliveries under her belt, she truly feels like the husband/partner's role is to be an advocate for his wife's needs and expectations in delivery and to help verbalized them (i.e. Continue to communicate with dr the birth plan details, emphasize what she needs/doesn't need in the room, keep family outside if desired, fetch water/chapstick etc) but that the moment is for the women. She doesn't truly believe a husband can co-participate in the delivery, as the Bradley movement pushes. He is there to support whatever she says and to back up however she sees fit for it to go down. It was actually a pretty frank take on it.
Ina May's book is next for me and I am taking a childbirth class soon but it's mostly to learn about the stages of labor and overall basics.
We are taking Bradley classes and I like it because it forces us to make time to think about this upcoming event and talk about it together. Plus, it gets me the occasional massage (relaxation practice). We've also hired a doula, and are delivering with midwives (inside a hospital). We had to switch providers to find a group that supported our hope for unmedicated L&D (and it was the best decision we've made!).
I'm also spoiled with examples of ladies who have done unmedicated births. This will be our first baby, but my mom had 7, with all but the last unmedicated. My best friend's wife went unmedicated. My sister in law went unmedicated. My sister had some kind of painkiller but avoided the epidural. So I'm lucky to know several who have successfully done it.
If your provider isn't supportive, it's not too late to switch! The condescension of our old provider ("oh everyone says they want unmedicated, until they're in labor") really put me off and had me more afraid of my provider than anything. It's given me a sense of calm to know I'll find support with my midwives, whatever my L&D decisions.
I think it all boils down to your specific relationship with your partner. I've never gone through labor, but generally my husband is great for me in situations where I am in pain or sick or whatever, and his presence tends to help me when things get tough. Others might get freaked out and be a hindrance, but to say that in general husbands should not be present at their child's birth is ridiculous. I know lots of dads who LOVED being there and felt closer to their partner and child because of the experience.
Finally, you shouldn't watch your own child be born because it will ruin your sex life? I'm sorry but get over it, this is how everyone comes into the world and it's pretty freaking incredible. If you don't want to look down there then don't, but I think putting the idea out there that seeing a natural biological phenomenon will cause divorce, etc, is just ridiculous.
This book is certainly adding to my confidence in that the more educated I am, the more prepared I will be during L&D.
I have also heard of this bizarre phenomenon where the baby daddy supposedly isn't attracted to his lady after witnessing the birth. My reaction was that of LArunnergal: like, WTF? Grow a pair.
But we three are obviously with guys who aren't at all like that (my personality wouldn't permit it), so it's not a problem we will face. Out of curiosity, though, if you have any knowledge/articles on the issue, @AmadorRose, I'd love to know more.
I think my hub's matter-of-factness about bodily functions (and his child-like sense of wonder at each new thing he learns about pregnancy and birth!) will help me stay calm when things start getting wild, so I'm glad he will be there. But I'm also glad we will have a doula for the added support.