Monday Bitchfest — The Bump
September 2016 Moms

Monday Bitchfest

Let it out, ladies!

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Re: Monday Bitchfest

  • Friends.  We moved from our hometown a couple years ago and left soooo many friends.  We made an group of friends but never got super close.  We moved from one side of the metro area to the opposite side and had a bit of a falling out with them them at the same time.  We get invited to one couple's big party (which I hate their parties, I'm too old) still but other than that nothing.  We have started making a new group but all of them talk about how much they don't want kids and dislike kids.  Every time we see any of them there is drinking involved. My friends from home I still talk to 1-3x a week each which is great but it would be nice to hangout with some in person. We will not have a support system when this baby gets here and I'm worried.

    Little guy born in September 2016
    Next little one due June 2019


    guitarra1614
  • @jhems776 I wouldn't worry too much. When we had DS, we were the only ones in our group of friends who had children (and still are) and I was really worried about feeling isolated. But when DS was born, we ended up making a few friends at various kid-related events and they have been amazing. Also, your BMB is always here to commiserate with what you're going through :)

    My bitch is the freaking snow. It's supposed to snow another 18 inches today. Yesterday felt like a cozy day in the house, but today I feel stuck in here. I'm pretty sure DS is going to start climbing the walls soon. 
    guitarra1614jhems776
  • My in-laws are visiting. I feel like this is all the explanation that should be needed, but I'll continue because I need to bitch or I'll explode. 

    They got into town Saturday night. We had been told, "Don't worry about seeing us Saturday night. It'll be late. We'll just see you on Sunday". So guess what. I didn't expect to see them at all. DH and I put the kids to bed. DD ended up being sick, so she came downstairs to snuggle on the couch with me and we were watching a movie. At 8:30, the doorbell rings. My doorbell NEVER rings so I knew who it was right away. Are you F***ing kidding me?! No text message, no call, no nothing to say, "Hey do you mind if we pop over for a few minutes just to say hi?"!! They just show up. And they see no problem with this whatsoever. They're lucky they didn't wake DS up because I would have lost my ever loving mind. The conversation that DH was dreading came up and I saved his butt by having it with MIL instead of making him bring it up. "When should we come down for the birth? Around the due date or wait?" Ugh. DH didn't want to hurt his parents feelings. Understandable. So I made it clear that they could come down when the twins are due (while I'm still in the hospital) or they need to wait a few weeks because my family comes first and we need to be able to adjust to the "new normal" before I have anyone else at the house constantly. (DH will not have time off, so it's not like he would be there as a buffer either.) I cannot handle 2 6-year-olds, 2 newborns and my in-laws a week after giving birth. Only some would survive. 

    Bring on Sunday. DD has a habit of thinking that she has to be Mommy #2 to DS (her twin, and no, she's not the older twin....she just acts like it). I called her on it and told her the same thing I always tell her ("DS has ONE mommy, and that's me, not you. So mind your own business."), thinking that maybe my MIL would catch on to this. Nope. Until I finally called her on it at dinner, she felt she had to be Mommy #2 all day. Lady, I do this without you 362 days out of the year! What makes you think I need your help or input the 3 days out of the year that we see you!?

    Yep, I sound like a total b***h. Believe me when I say that this all stems from many other problems that have been had in the past. I've gotten to the point where all I can be is half-way cordial. I find comfort in the fact that they are a good 24-hour drive from us!!
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    lnhann97
  • @UnwritteN12 - I feel your pain! My MIL is the absolute worst and I find it a struggle to be cordial.  She's incredibly nice she's just overbearing and refuses to cut the cord from her 28 year old son. When we told her I was pregnant she said "I had an idea! Anna was sick/tired when I was there."  I literally laughed out loud - no lady, I'm sick and tired of YOU, I feel pretty damn good!
    Also, FIL and stepMIL visited day after baby was born last time and stayed in a hotel - fantastic! BUT, they waited with us in the hospital to be discharged and acted super inconvenienced to wait, wanting me to go find a nurse to see if we could get out of there. Uhhh, we're not at a restaurant waiting for a bill, I'm good with waiting for my doc to discharge me (She was in an emergency C-section at the time, I was patient). They could have left and gotten lunch, no need to sit there twiddling their thumbs.  Then they came to meet us at the house like 5 minutes after we got home (I didn't want anyone at the house, wanted to introduce baby and dog and just feel what life was alone at home) and RANG THE DOORBELL! WTF?!?!  Our dog goes wild at the doorbell since it only rings a few times a year, and is only when they show up.. They KNEW we had just gotten home, let yourself in quietly. Idiots.
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    izzetootUnwritteN12frogdog06
  • Stupid work....stupid Monday. Luckily my boss is understanding and let's me sit here in my miserable nauseous state until I feel like I can move without throwing up...because neither of us wants that to happen lol.
  • ThurstobertayThurstobertay
    250 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    member
    edited February 2016
    This is so silly I can't believe I'm even writing this, but I had a mild Facebook war with my grandma-in-law.

    I'm a fan of The Onion and I recently liked an article related to the elections. I didn't comment, share, just hit "like." I'm a huge fan of The Onion and I enjoy most of their articles regardless of who/what they're about, even if the content hits close to home. It's like SNL this time of year, I think we need these kind of outlets to keep from taking things too seriously. 

    On my public wall, she called me sick and said I should stop spreading lies. I was flabbergasted. All I said in response was "The Onion is satire and isn't meant to be taken seriously." I mean, you can look at their main page right now and see a clearly facetious post about Marco Rubio waking up with a cybernetic implant and dorm rooms being decorated with empty bottles of Adderall.

    I'm hurt because we have very little family around and we're hoping to move to same side of the country as my husband's family, and now I've got the family matriarch telling that entire side I'm a sick liar because I liked some satire.
    September '16 -  May Signature Challenge
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    blondie080300frogdog06
  • @Thurstobertay - That's beyond ridiculous. First thing I would do is delete her comment off of your wall, that's totally uncalled for - even if it was a REAL article, it's not called for. Then I'd probably make my husband contact her (We tend to deal with difficult family situations with our immediate family members - he with his side, me with mine).  That comment has no place on your way having others wondering/speculating what it's all about. Get it out of there and explain to her why you deleted it.  The explanation you gave here explains why you liked it perfectly, tell her the same.
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    Thurstobertay
  • @AnnaS930 - I really appreciate this advice, I'm going to get my husband on this and delete the post. I think it's better for everyone this way and I'm really, really hoping this fizzles out quickly. 
    September '16 -  May Signature Challenge
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    AnnaS930
  • Just survived (barely) lunch with my boss.  The food part was fine but the driving.  He is one of those drives a pinch to fast, changes lanes too much, and breaks a pinch to late.  Then we go to the town center and he spent at least 10m in the parking garage :|  .  I have motion sickness and normally get a pinch sick when he drives but with pregnancy nausea on top of it and the endless garage turning I really thought today was going to be my first puke of pregnancy, well I guess this could still happen as I just got back and still feel bad.....

    Little guy born in September 2016
    Next little one due June 2019


  • @Thurstobertay thats hilarious! I love The Onion and i'm assuming your grandmother is completely clueless about it.  Does she understand what a satirical magazine is?  Maybe once you explain it to her, she'll apologize. I am also a firm believe that anyone over the age of 65 should not be allowed on FB, lol! 

    I have a new bitchfest topic, why is there no auto spell corrector in TB! I had just had to look up 3 words to write that response! Geez...

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    Thurstobertaybackoffunicornblondie080300
  • @izzetoot - Ohh man, I tried to explain but I don't know that it worked. I haven't talked to my father-in-law directly, but after talking to my husband I guess FIL is going to speak to his mom in-person about checking out sources, posting stuff on Facebook in general, so on and so forth. This is turning into a saga, haha.

    I hear you about spell check. It's weird, it used to frustrate me at times but now I kinda enjoy autocorrect snafus. How else would I run into gold like "do you want hockey puck chicken for dinner?"
    September '16 -  May Signature Challenge
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    izzetoot
  • @TheTamedShrew it's like you're in my head. Amen! Don't get me wrong I am happy for this pregnancy but the first trimester is killing me. Mostly this damn heartburn. Constantly. I can't wait for this part to be over so I can get excited. I also would like to complain about the fact that the nearest pretzel stand is across town. This makes me very sad as carbs/salt seem to be the only thing that help my heartburn and nausea. No ankles here I come again!
  • @izzetoot Chrome has a spellchecker built in, which works any time you type online.  I'm assuming the other browsers probably do, too.
    Chrome instructions:
    "To enable or disable spell-checking, click the Chrome menu button in the top right on the browser toolbar. Select Settings and at the bottom click Show advanced settings. Scroll down to Languages and click the Language and input settings…button.

    Chrome Languages

    Notice that you can also enable or disable page translations.

    At the bottom of the Languages settings menu, you can check a box to Enable spell checking. Next to that option is a link to your Custom spelling dictionary, which lets you add words to the default dictionary used by Chrome. This is where you can add names and things you frequently use and know how to spell better than Google does."

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  • @Jabreen thank you! I followed the instructions but it was not under the Languages tab for me (on Chrome but maybe an older version) But I did find it under privacy settings!! Woot woot!

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  • @izzetoot I'm enjoying trying to pick out the 3 words that looked wonky to you that required looking up :) I do the same thing!
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  • AnnaS930 said:
    @izzetoot I'm enjoying trying to pick out the 3 words that looked wonky to you that required looking up :) I do the same thing!
    Hahaha! I apparently don't know how to spell satirical, apologize or hilarious! But I do now!!  :D

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    AnnaS930
  • My stomach is sooo achy! It could be due to anything really. I had a cyst with my previous pregnancy that was causing pain. Could be ligament pains because I've had those this early too. Or it could be the unthinkable which I refuse to even give much thought to. And I'm still not freaking hungry and im not even feelin sickly yet so I'm not sure what's causing the inability to find anything edible. Hormones right?? I'm just ready for the second trimester!!!! 

  • I already bitched about this on the check-in, but I was supposed to have my first ultrasound tomorrow. I scheduled it over 3 weeks ago. Now we're getting a ton of snow so they cancelled the appointment for tomorrow and I have to wait until NEXT Wednesday to get back in with my doctor. I know they're doing it to keep everyone safe, but it was so close and now it's so far away again!
    BFP 9/5/14, EDD 5/12/15, MMC 10/2/14
    Adopted our rescue fur baby 11/30/14
    BFP 8/28/15, EDD 5/9/16, MMC 10/6/15, D&C 10/8/15
    BFP 1/6/16, EDD 9/16/16

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    blondie080300
  • @Pellylang That's rough!  Waiting is SO HARD and when you finally think you're almost there...another week seems like an eternity!  I have no words of wisdom but I feel you!  Stay warm and safe!
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  • I have to go into work on my day off
    Me: 26     DH: 25
    DS1 -- 9/30/2016


    blondie080300frogdog06jhems776
  • I'm home sick today bc I bruised or sprained my ribs from coughing an gagging so hard over the past week. Hurts to move, sneeze or laugh without pain ( not extreme pain, but enough to be annoying and interfere with your usual stuff) I'm seriously just done with feeling icky!
    Me:35, DH 37  ~ Married July 2014
    ttc July 2015 ~ bfp Nov 2015 (cp)
    bfp Dec 2015 ~ (tfmr 17wk, March 2016, genetic disease)
    ttcal May 2016
  • My Advanced Placement seniors apparently can't figure out how to put numbered and labelled laptops back onto the correct, also-labelled shelves in the laptop cart...I had to reorganize the lot of them AGAIN today.  Also, none of them bothered to do the web lab over the weekend as assigned, so we're another day behind schedule. >:( 

    Oh yeah, and all my regular physics kids have stopped taking notes and are just snapping pictures of everything I put on the board.  I should stop writing anything down and see how well they do.  Kids these days!  (said semi-sarcastically)
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    blondie080300guitarra1614
  • @jabreen The thing with notes is just bizarre to me. I write a ton of notes to this day, even at work, since the act of writing helps information stick and I like having something to reference. Kids these days.
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  • Sporty1216Sporty1216
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    member
    edited February 2016
    @pellylang --I'm so sorry! That's the worst. Everything is getting cancelled here tomorrow too due to snow, and my appointment was today. I was so grateful I squeaked in before the snow emergency did! I hope the next week flies by for you. And, on the upside, baby will be even cuter and more baby-looking in a week's time!

    blondie080300
  • @Jabreen Yes, notes!  I'm currently training a new person at work - he's fresh out of college.  After the first day, he had absolutely nothing written on his notepad.  So the second day, I made mention to the fact that I was walking him through this process and program and expected him to attempt to do it on his own next time (of course being available to answer questions).  Still no notes.  So I started saying at specific times, "Oh and you might want to write this next thing down..."  Even then, his notes were a garbled mess.  Definitely not something he would be able to refer to later.  Set him out on his own to duplicate the exact process we trained on...even gave him detailed documentation outlining every step.  Still, he had a HARD time with the assignment.  I am realistic to the fact that learning takes time and that mistakes will be made along the way...but can't help but think that maybe a few notes (or perhaps actually reading the documentation) might have made a huge difference!
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  • I finally returned home today from taking care of my FIL. My return flight was only an hour but felt like a freaking eternity! The guy next to me needed his seat plus half of mine. He kept leaning over and  would prop half his butt on me! Top this with the fact that his suit smelt like moth balls and he had rank b.o. Then the guy behind me was eating what smelled like bugles and made me gag. I hate flying! 
    blondie080300JennM205
  • I'm sick of making dinner for the fam. By the time we sit down together, the thought of eating what I just spent an hour making makes me want to puke.

    Evelyn (3.24.10), Graham (5.30.13) & Miles (8.28.16)
    frogdog06TheTamedShrewmyducklings
  • So one of my best friend's father died this weekend. :( So I went over to her mom's house today to offer my support to her and the family. I forgot that her mom smokes like a chimney though...INSIDE. No one knows I am pregnant and I am sitting in a small living room listening to my friend recall the events leading up to her father's death while inhaling second-hand smoke. It was AWFUL. I felt such panic inside and guilt and I didn't know what to do. Her mom just kept on lighting up. I really wanted to be there for them all but had to leave after I counted cigarette #6 or 7. I was there maybe an hour and 20 minutes.
    Married: 3/21/15
    First time mom to a human but have been a puppy mamma for over 12 years :)

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    myducklings
  • Not only did I have to come to work on my day off. Now I will be working until 9pm and have to be in the office at 6am. This pregnant lady just wants to sleep!!!
    Me: 26     DH: 25
    DS1 -- 9/30/2016


    blondie080300cassloumymom2adoodlefrogdog06
  • My first Monday Bitchfest, so I'm letting it all out! For starters, my gums bleeding every time I floss isn't so great. It's killing me having to wait for the first OBGYN visit (9 more days... but who's counting??). Since this is my first, I've been in a fog and unable to think of anything else- so a big test I'm supposed to be studying for has gone by the wayside while I look up all the weird symptoms my science experiment of a body has been going through (the latest- allergic reaction to a wave of my own damned hormones yesterday which left my arm and hand covered in itchy bumps). Plus the fact that I am just over halfway through grad school and planned to finish school first, but now will be taking a year off and my student loans will be coming-a-knocking on my door (they may want my first born when I can't pay the $800+ per month that they want). The disappointment from my family at the pause in my education will be profound. These headaches UGH! Before I found out I was prego, I went all bright pink and purple with my hair, which is now fading so fast it's insane and I can't do squat about it until at least the second trimester. In fact, there are so many things I would have taken care of before-hand if I had planned this. I would have lost the 30 pounds I had left to go after the first 37 I lost to get to my goal weight too. I feel like a cow. Don't get me wrong, I'm excited and happy, and no one is ever really totally ready for this, but I'm also really worried about all of the things we need to figure out. My main full-time job, which is my dream job managing a non-profit art museum, doesn't have short term disability or FMLA, I'm due right when a big show is opening, I can't enroll for classes again in the fall so I'll likely be in a wheelchair by the time I get my M.A., we have a one bedroom apartment (it's beautiful, but where are we going to put all the baby stuff?) and we can't afford a bigger place, my car should be replaced for a safer more reliable one but that's also out of our price range, just so many things. AND we haven't told our parents yet so I feel awful about lying and hiding things from them. My mom will be over the moon but my dad, who is this hyper-active over-achieving triple iron man, isn't the #1 fan of DH and believes I should wait another 5 years at least to have kids (I'm 32, I'm AOK with having them at this age). In fact, most of my family spent most of the last year telling me how we should wait to have kids. Not looking forward to spilling the beans to most of the family. Over-thinking EVERYTHING, crazy dreams, weird sleep patterns, and desperately trying to take it one day at a time. Now if the damned doctor's appointment would hurry up, I could at least have one less thing to worry about! I want to see & hear my little nugget!


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    frogdog06jennlynn777persingerma
  • I was not quite expecting to be pregnant at this time. I'm back in school, and taking 3 science labs this semester. This morning in chemistry the woman next to me reeked of cigarettes and perfume. Then, tonight in microbiology we did a lab studying E. coli.  The smell coupled with the anxiety of dealing with it almost made me vomit in the classroom. (for those who don't know, E. coli literally smells like poop).  Then I came home, and my husband had burnt toast- so the whole house reeks of burnt food smell.  I can't get a break with the smells today!
  • My first Monday Bitchfest, so I'm letting it all out! For starters, my gums bleeding every time I floss isn't so great. It's killing me having to wait for the first OBGYN visit (9 more days... but who's counting??). Since this is my first, I've been in a fog and unable to think of anything else- so a big test I'm supposed to be studying for has gone by the wayside while I look up all the weird symptoms my science experiment of a body has been going through (the latest- allergic reaction to a wave of my own damned hormones yesterday which left my arm and hand covered in itchy bumps). Plus the fact that I am just over halfway through grad school and planned to finish school first, but now will be taking a year off and my student loans will be coming-a-knocking on my door (they may want my first born when I can't pay the $800+ per month that they want). The disappointment from my family at the pause in my education will be profound. These headaches UGH! Before I found out I was prego, I went all bright pink and purple with my hair, which is now fading so fast it's insane and I can't do squat about it until at least the second trimester. In fact, there are so many things I would have taken care of before-hand if I had planned this. I would have lost the 30 pounds I had left to go after the first 37 I lost to get to my goal weight too. I feel like a cow. Don't get me wrong, I'm excited and happy, and no one is ever really totally ready for this, but I'm also really worried about all of the things we need to figure out. My main full-time job, which is my dream job managing a non-profit art museum, doesn't have short term disability or FMLA, I'm due right when a big show is opening, I can't enroll for classes again in the fall so I'll likely be in a wheelchair by the time I get my M.A., we have a one bedroom apartment (it's beautiful, but where are we going to put all the baby stuff?) and we can't afford a bigger place, my car should be replaced for a safer more reliable one but that's also out of our price range, just so many things. AND we haven't told our parents yet so I feel awful about lying and hiding things from them. My mom will be over the moon but my dad, who is this hyper-active over-achieving triple iron man, isn't the #1 fan of DH and believes I should wait another 5 years at least to have kids (I'm 32, I'm AOK with having them at this age). In fact, most of my family spent most of the last year telling me how we should wait to have kids. Not looking forward to spilling the beans to most of the family. Over-thinking EVERYTHING, crazy dreams, weird sleep patterns, and desperately trying to take it one day at a time. Now if the damned doctor's appointment would hurry up, I could at least have one less thing to worry about! I want to see & hear my little nugget!
    You can totally dye your hair! Just make sure you are in a well ventilated area
    SarahDarah333
  • I told my grandma  (who raised me) that I'm pregnant today. They've had my 3 year old dd for the last 10 days as I've been sick with the flu (and all day "morning sickness"). I put a shirt on my dd that said "promoted to big sister effective September 2016" and waited. I watched her read it but she said nothing. 

    A bit later, we walked to the car and asked if she read the shirt. She gave me a weird look and went on a rant on how I don't need another excuse to have a dirty house (my house isn't pristine but it's clean).

    It broke my heart that she couldn't be happy for me. She knows we've been trying. Yet that was her response. I confronted her and asked what was so hard to be excited about. What ever happened to congratulations?! 

    When I told her I was pregnant with my daughter, her response was "oh shit. Why would you do that?". But I wasn't married at the time and had only known my so for a year so I understood. But now?! 

    I just don't understand. :( I'm heartbroken 
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    frogdog06jennlynn777
  • Housing prices in the SF Bay Area. Like seriously, WTF, for the average price of ONE house, you could buy two to three elsewhere. Still waiting on this bubble to burst...(instead we're wasting sh*t tons of moola on rent).
    Also spending tons of money on take out because I never know what I'll be eating until ten minutes beforehand and it's never what we already have in the fridge.


    noelani42jhems776
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