I'm glad we have this board.

carrieandr · January 2016

I mentioned on the PGAL board that I got my blood drawn for the MaterniT21 test today and a 26 yr old said she's not familiar with that test and will have to look into it. I explained that I'm getting it because I'm "advanced maternal age" so insurance covers it. Anyhoo, I'm glad there's a place where we're all AMA. I don't feel or look old, but sometimes I have jarring moments when I'm reminded of the large gap between me and a lot of other moms-to-be. I suppose I'll be faced with it when my child starts school and I'm old enough to be the mother of one of my child's classmates' mothers. (But on this board, some of you are probably thinking, "but you're only 37!" --And this is why I love you.)

redheadbride15 · January 2016

I feel exactly the same way. I've been following a different pregnancy forum (not TB - it's way too crowded and chaotic here!) but I'm the oldest woman in my birth month board there, by quite a bit. And I'm only 38! I've also always wanted 2 kids and this is my first pregnancy, so I love hearing the stories of 40+ moms because I hope I will be there myself one day soon. (One at a time first though...)

Jenniferk08 · January 2016

Same. I have slowly ventured to my BMB but still not fully jumping in yet. I'm 37 and certainly feel every bit of it lately but don't want to actually know I'm old.

Sporty1216 · January 2016

Agreed! It is nice. And no one here makes me feel weird about being over 40!

So much if this is regional too, I think. I grew up in CA and now live in Nebraska. Here, everyone has their kids in their 20s and maybe, if they are real crazy, in their early 30s. DH and I often feel "old" around parents of other kiddos LOs age.

But, when we travel to CA to visit my family, it seems like everyone is having their kids in their late 30s and early 40s! We blend right in out there.

One of my friends mom's reminded me that we won't always be older than our kids' friends' parents--even if they started early, they might have a bunch of them and we may end up being with their youngest or something.

In any case. I love this board. And I trust that we'll all find local friends with little ones who are near in age or don't see age as a factor in friendship.

Oh--and the BMB is wild! It's fun for passing the time, but I'm guessing I'll be a mostly lurker there and make this my real home.

redheadbride15 · January 2016

@Sporty1216 You're totally right about the regional differences! Here in Boston almost everyone is an older mom. In my personal circle I don't know anyone who had kids before 30, and my OB told me that about half of her patients are AMA. But my husband's family is in TX and they seem a bit shocked that I'm having a baby in my late 30s.

gemini2005 · January 2016

Although I'm a bit older than other mothers at 36, I still feel young because I have young kids. It seems like people around my area (mostly rural) had kids in their 20's and have moved on from the baby stage. I feel lucky to be experiencing motherhood at this stage in my life.
I'm pretty happy this board is picking up- It's nice to have other AMA's around!

Wyattnash00 · January 2016

It's different times!! In My local moms group in TN, 7 of us are pregnant, 5 are 35+, and all of my girlfriends (who I grew up with) back home in Boston all have children under 4, and 2 are pregnant now. I think as older moms we'll always run into feeling 'old' at times, just means we're wiser at life!!

Mamafesto · January 2016

I too live in an area where "geriatric pregnancy" as I like to call it, is very common. All of my colleagues had their kids in their 30s or 40s, so I feel quite at home. That said, since I'm keeping this on the down low for now, it's nice to have an internet home of contemporaries. I have peeked in on my BMB and it's definitely a different scene (and not in a good way).

Infantino22 · January 2016

Totally agree! I have yet to post on my birth month board. I'm not sure where I fit. Maybe it has something to do with how long it took us to get pregnant, or having an early loss before, or just being older and having seen so many things from friends and family's experiences. I lost the wide eyed innocence somewhere along the way...

skooterblenny · January 2016

I ran into a mom at daycare today, who was talking about her 21st birthday this past weekend. She has a FOUR year old, so I for sure felt old picking up my kid! That means she was born in 1994!!! I was in HS!!! lol

Glad to have other "sophisticated/wise" moms to turn to

redheadbride15 · January 2016

@skooterblenny haha, I've had those "I could be your kid's grandmother" moments.

carrieandr · January 2016

Five months after my first loss, I overheard a cashier say, "Good news and bad news. Good news is I'm pregnant, bad news is I won't be able to drink for my 21st birthday." I gritted my teeth.

kimma1105 · January 2016

I couldn't agree more reading this board. I am so appreciative of every day of this pregnancy. Headaches, morning sickness, leg cramps and all.

lillebowski23 · January 2016

I am liking this board too. There seems to be a lot of drama and flaming going on on the BMB. At first the drama was funny but after the first 10 threads, it got a little old.

bgf1 · January 2016

Yes I checked out the birth month board for July, their is definitely a snark factor there that is thankfully absent here ☺my circle of friends is real life almost all became mother's in there 30s. So I am glad to have a group of mom's here and IRLwho appreciate hoping " they don't think I am the Grandma "

lillebowski23 · January 2016

Yup i live just outside of Boston and most of the ladies in my circle didn't start with kids until their early to mid 30s.

redheadbride15 · January 2016

In my extended group of friends and family I can only think of one person who started a family in her 20s, and she was like 28-29. Probably about half the moms I know were over 35 with their first. But I'm still the oldest childless (for now at least) one in my circle. It's like there was a mad rush right around 35 when everyone suddenly started popping out babies.

tjest · January 2016

I've never been a forum person, but I'm glad I found this because truth be told I've been freaking out about being 37 & having a baby after 14 years! It's nice knowing there are women who can relate.

I am 9.3 weeks pregnant with baby #2. My daughter just turned 14. It was just the 2 of us for a long time, but then almost 3 years ago I met and fell in love with an amazing man. My daughter calls him her stepfather (even though we aren't sure we'll have a wedding) and he's extremely good to her. Finding out we are having this little one is so exciting for all of us. We're ecstatic!

Ssoccerball · January 2016

I didn't originally respond to this thread, but the more I poke around my BMB or the 1st trimester board, the more glad I am that I'm over 35 and qualify to be here! I'd be terrified to post on those boards, as there seem to be a group of vultures that respond to every post with a). This gets asked all the time, you're an idiot, use the search function; b). Ask your doctor, you're an idiot, are you really relying on strangers for advice? Or c). You used the wrong word, you're an idiot, go back to school. It's frightening out there!!!

carrieandr · January 2016

@Ssoccerball it annoys me when twelve people on the bmb jump on someone for saying gender instead of sex. 1. Everyone knows what they mean. 2. It is highly unlikely that the child is going to be transgender. 3. No one is trying to be offensive when they say gender. 4. The brochure for the MaterniT21 test says "analysis of...fetal gender..."

redheadbride15 · January 2016

Agreed @CarrieandRoy and @Ssoccerball !! I think that the sheer volume on the BMBs makes it very difficult to form a cohesive community that is respectful and helpful to each other. When you have hundreds of people there of course someone is going to ask a naive question and then someone else will probably ask the same one a couple days later, and people quickly lose their patience. Plus I can't keep track of people! That's why I like a smaller board like this one

Ssoccerball · January 2016

Yes, @CarrieandRoy and @redheadbride15. All of those things! I read one the other day where someone referred to themselves as "preggo" and they were promptly reprimanded, since they are "pregnant, not spaghetti sauce." Good grief! I appreciate that things are much more supportive at the "old folks home"

Sporty1216 · January 2016

Haha. I agree with all of the above. The BMB meets my need for something to read--there is always something new-- but I have a hard time feeling like I will ever connect with folks there. Tis good to be home sweet home here.

Jenniferk08 · January 2016

I can't believe the rules for my BMB. My February 2011 group was so amazing. 6 years later and many of us are still friends. We've cried to each other over the birth of our present kids, medical issues diagnosed, loss of family members, divorces and the loss of pregnancies. They were my support after I had a chemical pregnancy and then a few months later I was in a bad car accident.

It's so sad how quick these groups now will tear you apart.

Sporty1216 · January 2016

I'm sorry to hear it, @Jenniferk08 it really doesn't seem like it needs to be that way. Blah.

carrieandr · January 2016

The sad thing is, they are all mothers & mothers-to-be. They will be influencing young minds.

tiffanyhr · January 2016

Haven't even been over to the September 2016 board. Should I risk it? Anyone else been there? Would rather be here with all of you! Everyone is so supportive and sweet with a little humor and honest feeling mixed in. Love it!

Wyattnash00 · January 2016

This board is refreshing and awesome!! I can't keep up with anything on my bmb anymore, ecstatic I found this crew!

redheadbride15 · January 2016

Yeah PG>35 rocks. We can all just hang out here

Sporty1216 · January 2016

I'm over on September 16 and it's been okay other than a few early flare ups. I feel like this is my real home, but I visit over there sometimes.

But seriously. PG > 35 is the best. It's nice to always be met with good support, good humor, and good advice. This board and TTC>35 are the first ones I have been a part of that make me understand how people become actual friends via the internets.

mthoomom · January 2016

I'm 38 and I have a little one due in March... I also have two teenage boys in high school. I feel like I don't fit in anywhere!

lillebowski23 · January 2016

There are 10 and 11 years between me and my younger sisters. Having them around taught me a lot about having babies around. Sure it was a long time ago, but i stll remember some of the tricks my mom used to help my youngest sister's colic.... too bad those tricks don't work now

bgf1 · January 2016

Age gaps can be funny my sister and I were very close as children but not so much as adults... Whereas my husband and his brother are 12 years apart and had the totally opposite experience. Additionally the age gap between my husband and his niece and nephew is almost the same as between he and his brother, and because he was a young cool uncle the relationship between them is great

carrieandr · January 2016

@tiffanyhr I read stuff on the July bmb and chime in once in a while, but I prefer it here.

mthoomom · January 2016

@lillebowski23 @bgf1 I'm looking forward to this new experience! I'm really hoping that they will enjoy each other in spite of the age differences. I just worry that they are SO far apart in age (16 years and 14 years by the time he's born) that they won't really get to ever know each other that well. It will certainly be a big difference from having children that are only 18 months apart!

redheadbride15 · January 2016

mthoomom said:
@lillebowski23 @bgf1 I'm looking forward to this new experience! I'm really hoping that they will enjoy each other in spite of the age differences. I just worry that they are SO far apart in age (16 years and 14 years by the time he's born) that they won't really get to ever know each other that well. It will certainly be a big difference from having children that are only 18 months apart!

My best friend is 18 years younger than the youngest of her 3 siblings (I think her mom was in her mid-40s when she was born). They're all really close! She says in many ways her sibs were like extra parents or aunts/uncles/ role models for her.

Jenniferk08 · January 2016

My sister and I are 13 years apart and my brother and I are 15. I'm the oldest. Growing up was hard and I think j was more connected to my brother (I was in the room when he was born). My sister and I have gotten closer as she has gotten older and is more on my level.

yolandamunoz · January 2016

Hi girls! Happy to be here too. I'm 35 and this is my first pregnancy, so everything is new, exciting and scary. I also feel old sometimes but confident that I am ready and eager to be a mom. I am from Peru but live in Chile. My husband is American from the west coast.
Hope to read you often!

carrieandr · January 2016

I just went to Peru in May.

emsmama15 · January 2016

I'm from a blended family. My oldest sister is almost 18 years older than I am and got married when I was 1.5! We're VERY close now. I'm the godmother of her youngest child, she's the godmother of my oldest. If I hadn't had her when our mom died, I don't think I'd have made it through. Age gaps don't really mean much, I don't think!

emgee27 · January 2016

I'm sad I didn't discover this group until almost my third tri. I have just been reading along with all of you since and it was the first time that I felt I didn't mind having AMA written on my doctor chart. I'm young at heart too and live in an area where most people have their kids in their 30s. I had such a blast in my 20s anyway and wouldn't change a thing. Not to mention, I was in completely the WRONG long-term relationship! Glad to have escaped that one, marriage and kid-free!

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