For those of you that have tried sleep training:
At what point did you reach your breaking point? I've been really hesitant to try sleep training for a couple reasons. One is that I just don't like the idea of crying it out although I know there are different methods and two, because LO is in daycare and won't have this training consistency for nap time, also I'm really bad with being consistent with these things in general.
However, LO is 6.5 months and I'm going crazy without a good night of sleep. We rock him to bed around 8-8:30pm. About 50% of the time, he wakes briefly before H and I go to bed around 10 and we have to rock him for another few minutes. 100% of the time, he is up within 3 hours now. He used to sleep for a 4-5 hour stretch and then wake every 2 hours or so. We used to bring him to bed around the 3am mark when it was difficult to get him back down in his crib. However, recently we've given up and just bring him to bed after the first wake up around 11 or 12am since he will continue to wake almost every hour if we don't. I really don't have a huge problem with cosleeping safety-wise but it's getting really uncomfortable for me. I basically wake about every hour and my back/neck hurt so bad from contorting my body in certain ways to make sure LO is okay. And LO still wakes up a ton during the night. It's just easier to nurse him back to sleep immediately as opposed to repeatedly trying to get him back in his crib, since he wakes up almost immediately after we put him down half of the time. He's been a rather high needs baby since day one though, so I don't even know if sleep training would work for us...
Thoughts?
Re: sleep training?
If nothing else, it's always nice to hear that I'm not alone! I also work FT with a crazy commute and man...what I wouldn't give for 4 hours of uninterrupted sleep, lol. If I have to hear about another person's baby sleeping through the night with no effort required, I'm going to lose it! :P
I guess I should probably pick up a few books to read before implementing anything. I read about the pick up/put down method (I think that's the No-Cry solution- I can't remember. I read it months ago and then was too afraid to try, lol) but honestly that seems so exhausting for everyone.
First, what time is your LO waking up in the morning? Because I think going to bed at 8:30 is too late, unless your LO can sleep until 8:30. Babies who are overly tired have an even harder time falling asleep. How long is your LO sleeping at daycare?
Second, it doesn't matter what method you try. The first few days will be hard. And I am sorry, but every method will involve some crying. Do your research and figure out what method works best for you and your schedule. And then stick with it. Don't cave at 3am. And make sure to start on a day when you are house and can have a good bedtime routine for several days.
Once you figure out what method you like, talk to your daycare. they might not be able to follow your sleep training exactly but they should be able to implement parts.
**** Formerly Snoflakes4eva****
Thanks for the tips. LO wakes around 6am for daycare. His first nap is around 8am because of that. We've tried implementing bed time at 7:30p. Sometimes it works but he is still up within a few hours and no changes in sleep habits otherwise. He generally sleeps about 3 hours at daycare and sometimes I can squeeze in a short nap when I bring him home around 5. It definitely may be worth revisiting the 7:30p bed time as it's been about a month since we gave up on it.
@crsanchez87
I agree that the winding down/dim light time is important! I try to do this and try to yell at hubby to not overstimulate LO before bed time but we could definitely be doing a better job.
I've honestly just given up with a lot of stuff since I'm so darn tired. It looks like I just have to try again!
If you aren't consistent, nothing will work. And you definitely are not alone! With that being said, don't be afraid of tears. Most tough things with babies and kids involve tears. It's inevitable.
My daughter was waking 1-2 hours after she went to bed consistently EVERY single night and I knew she was fed, had a clean diaper and was tired, just having a hard time transitioning between sleep cycles. I stopped going in and let her fuss for a bit. Did this with my first child as well and it worked like a charm. After about 10-15 minutes she would put herself back to sleep and she stopped waking at that time. Me going in just made everything worse so I left her. She didn't have a need, I wasn't abandoning her, she just needed to go to sleep.
She was still waking once in the night for a bottle until she was 9 months old and I was more than happy to keep doing that until she started drinking less and less then I just stopped going in.
Both of my kids are great sleepers and I contribute that to my consistency and persistence. I like sleep, my kids like sleep, we are all much happier people because of it
I personally think the pick up/put down method is nuts because it only made my kids more upset (didn't really even try that with my second kid). However, sleep training is trial and error so you might have to try something for a while then switch if it isn't working.
With that being said, I really believe that this gets harder the older they get and the more aware they become. I'd bite the bullet and just let him cry. I've never had to leave either of my kids longer than maybe 20 minutes. You should be able to tell if it's not working. As long as his needs have been met then he's simply just fighting sleep and I know how hard it is to hear them cry but the pay off is so worth it. For everyone.
Some people would strongly disagree with me on this but I have 2 great kids that sleep like champs. No negative side effects from 2-3 nights of crying
BFP #1 12/23/13 MMC 01/24/14 @ 9w5days
Good luck with whatever method you use! It is so hard.
https://www.mybabysleepguide.com/2009/01/pupd-tbw.html?m=1
ETA: she was "snacking" overnight hourly before this, and last night she only fed twice again! I don't expect her to sleep through the night, but to wake and call for me when she's hungry or there is a problem. My goal is to have her learn that when she wakes up and everything is okay with her and around her, she can fall back asleep independently.
^ also, I don't think there's really a sleep training method that doesn't involve crying. Sleeping independently is a hard thing to learn and I personally think most babies will hate the idea of the change in being dependent on mom/dad to fall asleep. The pick up put down method was pretty much non-stop crying (like CIO), but with being there to comfort from afar and reassuring them/patting bum until they stop crying, then literally right after they stop crying you put them back down in their crib. It was beyond stressful for sure but at the point where I was ready to give up and do CIO, she turned a corner and didn't cry when I put her down, turned her head and talked herself to sleep with a smile.