UO Thursday

thefithuntress · October 2015

Didn't see it yet, and not sure if it's said, but my relative just sent pictures from her 1yr old's birthday so...

... I can't stand smash cakes. I think it's silly and gross to let your kid waste an entire cake and make a mess for a picture. I'm a photographer but I won't be partaking in this tradition.

PetitNightingale · October 2015

My UO is that I don't like chocolate. At all. Every time I go to an event there is always chocolate cake, chocolate candies etc and I just stand there feeling ungrateful because I don't want any. My second UO is that I think participation trophies are bullshit. One of the children I nanny brings home all kinds of ridiculous fake awards just for showing up. Trophies are for winning, not everyone can win all the time. Standards are not a bad thing.

elbou · October 2015

thefithuntress said:

Didn't see it yet, and not sure if it's said, but my relative just sent pictures from her 1yr old's birthday so...

... I can't stand smash cakes. I think it's silly and gross to let your kid waste an entire cake and make a mess for a picture. I'm a photographer but I won't be partaking in this tradition.

I completely agree! I love the messy face pictures from actually eating the cake, but they can make enough of a mess for that with just one piece of the cake!

Ceridwen77 · October 2015

thefithuntress said:
Didn't see it yet, and not sure if it's said, but my relative just sent pictures from her 1yr old's birthday so...

... I can't stand smash cakes. I think it's silly and gross to let your kid waste an entire cake and make a mess for a picture. I'm a photographer but I won't be partaking in this tradition.

I didn't know this was a thing. Ew.

MargaretC5 · October 2015

thefithuntress said:
Didn't see it yet, and not sure if it's said, but my relative just sent pictures from her 1yr old's birthday so...

... I can't stand smash cakes. I think it's silly and gross to let your kid waste an entire cake and make a mess for a picture. I'm a photographer but I won't be partaking in this tradition.

I agree not needing a whole cake just for them to smash. For DS we just gave him a piece of the regular cake everyone else was eating. I did enjoy seeing him make a mess, it was the first time he had processed sugar and he loved it (not really a surprise).

My UO, I don't like any snack cakes, even the Christmas tree ones. I just find them gross.

itstheblackwidowbaby · October 2015

thefithuntress said:
Didn't see it yet, and not sure if it's said, but my relative just sent pictures from her 1yr old's birthday so...

... I can't stand smash cakes. I think it's silly and gross to let your kid waste an entire cake and make a mess for a picture. I'm a photographer but I won't be partaking in this tradition.

My SIL is was a baker and her first son didn't like sweets or getting messy at a year old so she went all out for her second son. I won't lie, it was adorable. Plus there was a disposable table cloth under his highchair so the mess was non existent afterwards. It did break the dogs heart though.

My UO is picture related. Before you post a picture of someone on social media, you should take an honest look at it and go 'would this person want this shared?' And then ASK. Every single picture of us from our baby-q is so embarrassing for me since all of them are of me sitting so I look like a (very pregnant) whale. Cry.

thefithuntress · October 2015

itstheblackwidowbaby said:

Didn't see it yet, and not sure if it's said, but my relative just sent pictures from her 1yr old's birthday so...

... I can't stand smash cakes. I think it's silly and gross to let your kid waste an entire cake and make a mess for a picture. I'm a photographer but I won't be partaking in this tradition.
My SIL is was a baker and her first son didn't like sweets or getting messy at a year old so she went all out for her second son. I won't lie, it was adorable. Plus there was a disposable table cloth under his highchair so the mess was non existent afterwards. It did break the dogs heart though. My UO is picture related. Before you post a picture of someone on social media, you should take an honest look at it and go 'would this person want this shared?' And then ASK. Every single picture of us from our baby-q is so embarrassing for me since all of them are of me sitting so I look like a (very pregnant) whale. Cry.

I flat-out asked people not to post anything. A FB friend of mine's family put her little boy's (unannounced) name on there as a hashtag!! The pictures got deleted at the end of the day. She must have been so pissed.

ColoradoHiker · October 2015

My UO is that I think special detergents for babies are silly, and I really dislike the smell of Dreft. I'm going to put baby in a couple outfits washed in our regular detergent (not a free and clear), and if he doesn't have any skin issues, I have no intent on switching. I had very sensitive skin as a baby (to the point that my parents had to cloth diaper for a long time), but DH has no skin issues at all, so this could go either way.

rachswi · October 2015

ColoradoHiker said:
My UO is that I think special detergents for babies are silly, and I really dislike the smell of Dreft. I'm going to put baby in a couple outfits washed in our regular detergent (not a free and clear), and if he doesn't have any skin issues, I have no intent on switching. I had very sensitive skin as a baby (to the point that my parents had to cloth diaper for a long time), but DH has no skin issues at all, so this could go either way.

Gonna hop on that one and say I think many "baby-specific" items are a little ridiculous. The detergent is the only one I'm currently thinking of, but I'm tired of seeing "baby" slapped on something then it costs twice as much.

knolliepollie · October 2015

My UO is that I don't like chocolate syrup or semi sweet chocolate chips. One of the best things my BFF ever did for me was make me from scratch chocolate chip cookies without chocolate chips

people say well then that's a sugar cookie. No. It's. Not! Completely different, thank you!

FinePlacentaPie · October 2015

OK, all of you with hatred for smash cakes can bite me because: (Please don't quote/PDQ; sorry for the hugeness)

*poof*

Cook3133 · October 2015

As far as I know when you order you child's first bday cake at Walmart you can get a free mini cake for them to smash. Now I won't and haven't ever done a photo session with any of mine I do think that they can be very cute! We just give them a cupcake of pice of cake on their birthday and let them go at it.

My UO....... I hate "evil" costumes on little kids.

dramaphile · October 2015

thefithuntress said:
Didn't see it yet, and not sure if it's said, but my relative just sent pictures from her 1yr old's birthday so...

... I can't stand smash cakes. I think it's silly and gross to let your kid waste an entire cake and make a mess for a picture. I'm a photographer but I won't be partaking in this tradition.

I always think it's hilarious when babies don't want to touch the smash cake. I've had a few friends' kids refuse to touch the cake because it was messy! My niece had to be given a fork before she would eat hers. A smash cupcake would be better, although a lot of bakeries (especially grocery stores) do throw in a smash cake for free for first birthdays. Smash cakes are almost always huge, though, and get mostly wasted.

Also, baby detergent is ridiculous and unnecessary. Dreft is such a rip-off! We did buy the unscented detergent, but that's as far as I'm going.

itstheblackwidowbaby · October 2015

On the detergent thing, I was totally on board with just buying free and clear and testing a few of his outfits in with our normal stuff to see how he did down the line. My SO actually insisted on Dreft since its for babies. He thought it was unscented lol. Sucker.

BowWowBowie · October 2015

Edited: Added a Titus gif to take my political shindig views off of here. Realized regardless of UO, it's really not the time/place for any politics. Sorry!

Cook3133 · October 2015

May or may not be a UO but thought this was the best place to put this..

I DO NOT want a Halloween baby!! I have this feeling he won't be to much longer and a fear he will come on Saturday

. My husband thinks he'll come then just because I don't want him to. I really just want to take my other kids trick or treating! If I have to have him that day at least wait until after they get their fun!!!! I usually help prep my self for labor two weeks before my EDD but this time around just holding out until the weekend to start!

mamavbs · October 2015

Cook3133 said:
May or may not be a UO but thought this was the best place to put this..

I DO NOT want a Halloween baby!! I have this feeling he won't be to much longer and a fear he will come on Saturday . My husband thinks he'll come then just because I don't want him to. I really just want to take my other kids trick or treating! If I have to have him that day at least wait until after they get their fun!!!! I usually help prep my self for labor two weeks before my EDD but this time around just holding out until the weekend to start!

Yep I'm right there with you, mama. And I have a sweep tomorrow which is making me nervous in case it kicks me off for the Saturday (did with my DD!) but then I'm 39'weeks tomorrow and so uncomfy. I'm at that shit stage where I don't want to be pregnant but I don't want to give birth hahaha if someone can let me know what I can do about this that would be great.

My UO may not be an UO but it's on my mind so it's going here... I can not stand the amount of people texting and calling me asking "have I popped yet" or am I in labour. I know I should be grateful they care but I find it hard not to believe some of them just want the gossip. Anyway it's driving me mad either way. I will let you know when it's time, if you're on my list of people to tell. Otherwise just bloody wait!

kmd91 · October 2015

Cook3133 said:
May or may not be a UO but thought this was the best place to put this..

I DO NOT want a Halloween baby!! I have this feeling he won't be to much longer and a fear he will come on Saturday . My husband thinks he'll come then just because I don't want him to. I really just want to take my other kids trick or treating! If I have to have him that day at least wait until after they get their fun!!!! I usually help prep my self for labor two weeks before my EDD but this time around just holding out until the weekend to start!

Yes, this! People keep telling me how cute it would be if he were a Halloween baby. No, just no. We do not want him to have to share his birthday with Halloween every year. Like, I want to avoid that badly enough I'd much rather have him decide to come next week when his daddy is gone for training and I'll have to deal with the hassle of getting ahold of him and him getting released to come. Anything but a Halloween birthday.

BowWowBowie · October 2015

@Cook3133 I feel you, our c-section has been changed for the last time! November 5th, my husband is over the moon for a V for Vendetta baby, I think it's kind of cool, but I'm really reserved as well, I've already heard terrorist baby jokes.

Gapeach83 · October 2015

-I also don't want a Halloween baby. Luckily as of right now doesn't look like I will have one. DD2 already has a holiday birth NYE. Don't need 2 holiday birthdays.

- also not a cake person lobe the Christmas tree cakes just not regular cake. For my birthday I'll take the cookie or icecream cake because they aren't really cake.

- I am in the camp of tired of being pregnant but not ready for him to be here.

UO I really didn't want the doctor to guess a size. I was great being in the dark. Now that he has said looks like a big baby. I want to run and hide. I think sometimes ignorance is bliss. I know it's just a guess so I am not that worried just could have gone without knowing. Him just keeping it to himself and the other OBs would have been fine.

thefithuntress · October 2015

Oh, these all remind me that I hate the term "pop." What does that even mean? Will I spontaneously combust? Turn into popcorn? Mmmm.. popcorn.

modanz1 · October 2015

I guess mine is an UO - It doesn't bother me at all if I have a Halloween baby. People keep telling me I don't want to have to have Halloween themed birthday parties or have to share my LOs birthday with a "holiday" (Calling Halloween a holiday is a stretch to me)

I am capable of throwing my child a non-halloween themed birthday party people. And I just don't see why it matters if October 31st is his borthday.

ZoeH3 · October 2015

UO - I don't think tipping waitresses/bartenders/etc should be a thing. I think the restaurant/bar owner should be the one to dish out a fair wage. Why should this extra money come out of my pocket? All it really does is make me (middle class) poorer and the owners (typically upper class) even more wealthy. Sigh! I also hate feeling obligated to tip especially when I didn't even care for the meal/server.

modanz1 · October 2015

ZoeH3 said:

UO - I don't think tipping waitresses/bartenders/etc should be a thing. I think the restaurant/bar owner should be the one to dish out a fair wage. Why should this extra money come out of my pocket? All it really does is make me (middle class) poorer and the owners (typically upper class) even more wealthy. Sigh! I also hate feeling obligated to tip especially when I didn't even care for the meal/server.

As someone who worked in the restaurant industry for a long time, I can tell you that if tipping wasn't a thing and the owners paid a decent wage out of their pocket, the prices of the food and drinks would increase and you would still end up paying the same amount on your bill, only you wouldn't have the option of leaving less. There is tons of loss in restaurants, hence why so many fail, and most could not afford to pay their servers a regular wage without drastically increasing the menu prices.

VexedMommy · October 2015

modanz1 said:

ZoeH3 said:

UO - I don't think tipping waitresses/bartenders/etc should be a thing. I think the restaurant/bar owner should be the one to dish out a fair wage. Why should this extra money come out of my pocket? All it really does is make me (middle class) poorer and the owners (typically upper class) even more wealthy. Sigh! I also hate feeling obligated to tip especially when I didn't even care for the meal/server.

As someone who worked in the restaurant industry for a long time, I can tell you that if tipping wasn't a thing and the owners paid a decent wage out of their pocket, the prices of the food and drinks would increase and you would still end up paying the same amount on your bill, only you wouldn't have the option of leaving less. There is tons of loss in restaurants, hence why so many fail, and most could not afford to pay their servers a regular wage without drastically increasing the menu prices.

I would be ok with the price increase being passed along personally. Also, most restaurant owners are middle class. The failure rate of new restaurants is astronomical. I seem to recall it's something like 50% of all restaurants fail within the first 3yrs.

The way I tip is I have a floor of 10% and I only tip based on the service. The server can't control whether the food is terrible or not, although they should ensure that the order is correct and nothing is obviously wrong with the dish. I typically tip 20 - 25% and at inexpensive places will sometimes go as high as 50%.

Maybe this is a UO, but if you can't afford to tip well you should not go to a sit down restaurant. I've chosen to order take out a number of times when I wanted something from a restaurant, but knew I wouldn't be able to tip very well.

hacharles · October 2015

Stemming off of the 1st birthday smash cakes, my UO is that full blown birthday parties for 1 year olds are ridiculous.

kwaldy · October 2015

itstheblackwidowbaby said:
On the detergent thing, I was totally on board with just buying free and clear and testing a few of his outfits in with our normal stuff to see how he did down the line. My SO actually insisted on Dreft since its for babies. He thought it was unscented lol. Sucker.

I had sensitive skin as a baby and had to be cloth diapered. I already use free and clear so I didn't feel like it was necessary to invest in Dreft... but hubby did. He as well is a ssssuuckerrr.

RaisingJulian · October 2015

My UO would probably be I hate when the people at checkout offer you the credit card to their store (Target for example) like I get that's ur job but some of them r super persistent & I just want to scream "I don't want ur f'in credit card now scan my groceries!"

modanz1 · October 2015

VexedMommy said:

modanz1 said:

ZoeH3 said:

UO - I don't think tipping waitresses/bartenders/etc should be a thing. I think the restaurant/bar owner should be the one to dish out a fair wage. Why should this extra money come out of my pocket? All it really does is make me (middle class) poorer and the owners (typically upper class) even more wealthy. Sigh! I also hate feeling obligated to tip especially when I didn't even care for the meal/server.

As someone who worked in the restaurant industry for a long time, I can tell you that if tipping wasn't a thing and the owners paid a decent wage out of their pocket, the prices of the food and drinks would increase and you would still end up paying the same amount on your bill, only you wouldn't have the option of leaving less. There is tons of loss in restaurants, hence why so many fail, and most could not afford to pay their servers a regular wage without drastically increasing the menu prices.

I would be ok with the price increase being passed along personally. Also, most restaurant owners are middle class. The failure rate of new restaurants is astronomical. I seem to recall it's something like 50% of all restaurants fail within the first 3yrs.

The way I tip is I have a floor of 10% and I only tip based on the service. The server can't control whether the food is terrible or not, although they should ensure that the order is correct and nothing is obviously wrong with the dish. I typically tip 20 - 25% and at inexpensive places will sometimes go as high as 50%.

Maybe this is a UO, but if you can't afford to tip well you should not go to a sit down restaurant. I've chosen to order take out a number of times when I wanted something from a restaurant, but knew I wouldn't be able to tip very well.

Agreed. And I also don't care if they pass down the cost and tipping goes away. (Although TIPS does stand for To Insure Proper Service) I just hope people don't think doing away with tipping is going to save them money, they will be paying for it one way or another. Most people who have a problem with tipping have never worked for tips and have no idea what a servers job entails. I personally think everyone should have to wait tables at some point in their lives....it would make people act a lot more civil to each other in public.

grapesoda1111 · October 2015

My UO: Starbucks. Not a fan. Every now and then, sure, I'll get a strawberries and cream frap or maybe even a caramel one. But their coffee is horrible. And it is WAY too overpriced. I will never go out just for Starbucks. I have it maybe 2-3 times a year. I'm more of a Dunkin donuts gal or caribou coffee. Friggen love caribou. Not one in my area anymore, but they are much, much better than Starbucks.

onebadmotha · October 2015

I'm fine with tipping, and can definitely appreciate that serving is a tough gig.

That being said, my UO is that I hate when my server and former-server friends (which are most of my friends) act like it's the hardest job on the planet. I actually had one friend tell me I had never had a "real job" because I was never a server. Really? I would like to see him work in the infant-2 year old room in a preschool for 10 hours and then report back. Granted, I generally prefer babies/kids to adults/your average restaurant patron, but don't tell me I've never had a real job dude.

Side story: I was at dinner with a group of about 10 friends, all of whom were current or former servers except me. We asked our server to guess at the end of the night which one of us had never been a server, just based on our interactions with her. Her guess? The above dude who was all high and mighty about his "real job." Made me happy.

PetitNightingale · October 2015

I spent a good chunk of my childhood in Europe. Tipping isn't a thing there, it's included in the bill (at least it was in Italy). I still don't understand why we can't just pay people enough money to survive. What is so hard about that?

logarithm3 · October 2015

PetitNightingale said:
I spent a good chunk of my childhood in Europe. Tipping isn't a thing there, it's included in the bill (at least it was in Italy). I still don't understand why we can't just pay people enough money to survive. What is so hard about that?

Tipping is an extra in most countries in Europe and discretionary. It is frowned upon in most countries if you don't tip something at the end but there is absolutely no obligation.

The tip usually does not go directly to the waiter. It is distributed evenly to the restaurant team (including cooks etc).

kmd91 · October 2015

PetitNightingale said:
I spent a good chunk of my childhood in Europe. Tipping isn't a thing there, it's included in the bill (at least it was in Italy). I still don't understand why we can't just pay people enough money to survive. What is so hard about that?

Money doesn't just magically appear. The fact of the matter is any increase in wages to pay everyone a livable wage has to come from somewhere. Generally speaking, that would come out of the profits of a company, many of which can't afford to pay out more to their employees without making big changes. For example cutting employees or hours for employees or raising prices. Which in turn means we are all either paying more therefore the livable wage may not be as livable, or alternatively there are a bunch of people without jobs because employers can't afford to pay them more than they do now.

Obviously that's an over simplified explanation, but just trying to make the point that it's never as simple as "let's just pay people more because that is what's fair." Economics are very complex in our free market system.

Cook3133 · October 2015

So I was a waitress for 3 years. I am very picky about tipping. If you can't do your job and the food wasn't great, I don't tip. If the food was great and so was service I will tip good. I base it all on service and food, I don't care if you don't get paid enough, you took the job knowing that. Take pride in your job and it will be rewarded.

rubirubi89 · October 2015

I was a waitress for about 4 years and I actually loved it. Maybe because now my job is more formal and boring I actually miss my waiting days; interacting with all kinds of people was nice. The money wasn't bad either, but I was really good at keeping a smile even though I wanted to throat punch people for wanting to tip me with a coupon or a lottery ticket. smh

My UO is that as much as I'm anxious to meet my son I'm not ready for him to be born yet. I want to be pregnant forever!!

urby87 · October 2015

I was a server off and on at a few different places. I have only stiffed a server once, and it was because they asked our entire party to leave after they failed to check IDs before serving alcohol (which, legally, is their responsibility as a server) and one person was underage. Otherwise, I generally tip 20% or higher, based on the service (but never less than 10%, since most servers are required to report that much of their sales as tips for tax purposes, and even a bad server doesn't deserve to lose money to wait on me).

gipfish · October 2015

October 31st is also Reformation Day! A Reformation Day baby sounds much cooler than a Halloween baby to me.

My UO is that I don't like sarcasm. I'm just one of those unfortunate people who doesn't understand sarcasm. I probably should have been born in China where they don't use it.

lakesideknitter · October 2015

Cook3133 said:
So I was a waitress for 3 years. I am very picky about tipping. If you can't do your job and the food wasn't great, I don't tip. If the food was great and so was service I will tip good. I base it all on service and food, I don't care if you don't get paid enough, you took the job knowing that. Take pride in your job and it will be rewarded.

You will actually not tip a server because your food 'wasn't great'? How does your server have any impact on the quality of the food?

Some large restaurants on the east coast are actually doing away with tipping and, in turn, raising their food prices so they can pay their employees more. There is no line for gratuity on the receipt, but you can leave cash at the table for exceptional service. I love this model, because I'm also of the opinion that if you can't afford to tip, you shouldn't be going out to a sit-down restaurant.

ETA - my UO is that while I love chocolate and I love peanut butter, I hate the combo.

thefithuntress · October 2015

Eh. You're damned if you do, damned if you don't. I'm an event coordinator at a restaurant and people constantly complain about the 20% auto gratuity. It takes way more than the server to get that food to the table- the hostess who seated you, the busser who got your table ready and brought you water, the bartender making your drinks, the cooks on the line, the dishwasher in the back, me who coordinates your party and communicates with everyone your needs, the manager for getting the staff there and running the floor, the * FAR CRY FROM RICH * owner/operator who hasn't slept in 3 days, etc.

It's an amazing machine. Please pay these awesome people.

Cook3133 · October 2015

lakesideknitter said:

Cook3133 said:
So I was a waitress for 3 years. I am very picky about tipping. If you can't do your job and the food wasn't great, I don't tip. If the food was great and so was service I will tip good. I base it all on service and food, I don't care if you don't get paid enough, you took the job knowing that. Take pride in your job and it will be rewarded.
You will actually not tip a server because your food 'wasn't great'? How does your server have any impact on the quality of the food?

Some large restaurants on the east coast are actually doing away with tipping and, in turn, raising their food prices so they can pay their employees more. There is no line for gratuity on the receipt, but you can leave cash at the table for exceptional service. I love this model, because I'm also of the opinion that if you can't afford to tip, you shouldn't be going out to a sit-down restaurant.

ETA - my UO is that while I love chocolate and I love peanut butter, I hate the combo.

No, it's bad service AND bad food or problems with the order because of the kitchen staff, I won't tip, I've only done that a couple times. If the service was good but food wasn't that's not the servers fault, I know that

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