STMs and MTMs help us FTMs out. What purchases are unnecessary and why? Also, what purchases and expenses are must haves? This thread was inspired by the doula/midwife thread a little below it.
Example: If you have a large family the intends on hospital visits, would it be sensible to get a private room or an unnecessary expense?
Or, is a 2nd carriage/stroller an unnecessary expense?
Let us know!
Re: Must-haves vs. Wastes of money
Unnecessary gear:
Wipe warmer, baby bathtub(kitchen sink works fine, and I always got sent home with the pink tub for the first couple months), baby shoes,diaper pail ( I was given one with my third and hated it after about a month. They end up smelling horrific and squishing the diapers into the top becomes nasty. Walmart plastic bags work just was well and go out daily with the kitchen trash. That's about all I can think of at the moment.
Our hospital has a separate wing for suite rooms - like they include an attached separate room for family to hang out in and include a personal chef to cook meals. They also charge up front and insurance doesn't cover it. They say it is usually paid for by the grandparents that want to be there.
The rest of our maternity ward is only private rooms, of varying sizes. It is first-come, first-serve on which room you get. I wouldn't pay extra for any particular room, but I don't think that's even an option.
The other thing is that if it's not crowded, you could maybe be given a private room and not have to pay for the upgrade. Again, our hospital doesn't have that option, so I don't know.
That being said, if the only way to guarantee there wasn't another patient/family in my room was to pay for a private room, I would seriously look into that.
As for a second stroller... We had our jogger/travel system stroller and then a SnapNGo for quick, little trips that we didn't need the big all-terrain tires for.
Would ziplock bags for poopy diapers inside a pail work?
Similarly different types of strollers fit different needs better than others. We started out with a travel system which was great, then switched to a light umbrella stroller when DS got big enough to use it. The umbrella stroller fits much easier in the car trunk and has been great for shopping trips. However we're now talking about a jogging stroller. We go to the zoo a lot and the rough terrain eats up any other type of tire.
@BostonBaby1 We tried the diaper genie but have liked the munchkin arm and hammer pail much better. I felt like the arm and hammer is easier to change bags and with the baking soda dispenser in top it does a pretty good job with the smell.
Jamie
This is amazing! Thank you guys. So do you think that if I use these bags inside of an arm and Hammer pail that I'll be good for four days?
I personally used Babylist for a nursery checklist because it makes you take a lifestyle quiz and recommends items based on that. It really helped narrow things down. Hopefully I've registered for things I'll actually use!
Jamie
Ah. How long do you think the arm and Hammer diaper pails can contain the stench? That is if one changes the cartridge frequently?
Jamie
- My roommate was quiet but her husband and family were not so I couldn't rest the way I wanted.
- She was really young, had a c-section and was in a lot of pain so her nurse kept coming in the room checking on her, which (again) kept me from resting the way I wanted
- Even though I have siblings and lived in a dorm I never shared a room and I learned I'm not built for that. I made the nurse come in and clean the entire bathroom and leave a bottle of spray, paper towels and disinfectant wipes for later use... lucky for me my roommate caught my drift and would clean up after every use. I don't want to know how that bathroom would have looked without that and this is the main reason I will not share a room again. Like I said my roommate was nice but everything about her existence annoyed the hell outta me and I wanted to push anything associated with her out the window. After being in labor for 24 hours the last thing I want to deal with is another person, let alone another person in a similar situation. I spent most of my time in the nursery and I even tried to leave because I wanted space!
If you can afford it, regardless of whom may or may not visit, get a private room. I 1M% recommend it if nothing else so you can rest relatively uninterrupted.
Jamie
We have the munchkin arm and hammer diaper pail. It doesn't smell and we love it. DS is 2. We change the bag about once a week.
We have the same stroller situation as @AlejandraN2 city mini gt and snap n go. Love them both!! I haven't decided what we are going to do about a double stroller but I know I'm going to keep my city mini gt to use after DS is too big for the stroller but I still need one for DS2.
We had a bunch of stuff that my sister let me borrow. We never used the baby bath tub, the bath ring, or the bumpo. We used the swing maybe twice and could have done without the bassinet easily. We rarely used the exerciser, we were advised not to use it. We didn't use the high chair (it was one of the adjustable ones that 'grows' with the child) until he was about 7 months, I ended up giving it back to her and getting the $15 one from IKEA, which I love. I loved my boppy so much I had 2. The PNP was great and we used it tons. We never had a rock n play. I had a lightweight bouncer I carried from room to room in case I needed to sit him down. And I love my Ergo.
In any case, we got a City Select* (did not get the 2nd seat with it) so that I can put the infant seat in one slot and the regular seat in the lower slot for DD. By the time that LO is old enough to sit in the regular stroller seat, I may not need a second regular seat if DD is walking more often. I'll reach that bridge when we get there, but it is always an option, or I could get her a glider board. It depends on how things are at that time. She would be almost 3 then.
So yeah, if you are going to have them with less than 3 years between them, I'd say go for the City Select, but don't get the 2nd seat because you can get that separately later on, if you even need to get it at all. All City Select model years work interchangeably. You can get the $20-25 adapters to put the regular seat in the lower slot and the car seat adapter for the infant seat in the regular slot.
*I was able to get a brand-new 2013 model for $299 at allbeebaby.com
Jamie
I also have multiple strollers, so it depends what you do. I run, so I have a jogging stroller, an umbrella stroller for once they are 6+ months when out shopping, etc., and I have a baby stroller a baby can sleep/lay. I had my daughter in November and never really went out or used a stroller until spring, so I could have done without the sleep/lay stroller. With my son in August, I still wanted to take my daughter to the park, etc. so it came in handy.
I loved a play mat with lights so I could shower with a 4 week old and they liked laying on the mat (portable). I would say a boppy, bumbo, wipe warmer, bottle warmer, fancy contraptions you can usually find a replacement in your home that you already have, so skip on those. I had a boppy and preferred a pillow for nursing.
Think about your lifestyle and what some moms love, others hate. Neither of my kids have liked a swing so far, but some moms swear by them. I have my kids put themselves down around six weeks and love a mobile in the crib with music, others think they are a waste! Good luck!
I didn't read through all the replies so this may be a repeat. I'm having my third and here's my thoughts, but definitely depends on where you live (city/suburban, how much room you have, etc.) and your preferences.
Loved --
Rocking/glider chair - get the most comfortable you can find for the nursery, you will probably spend a lot of time in it.
Ergo baby carrier- loved the ergo and used it a lot, especially with my second when I wanted to have hands free but also be holding the baby. I also used the infant insert for the ergo a lot with the second when the baby was smaller.
Snap n Go
Jogging Stroller (we had a cheaper one with our first and now have the Bob)
Good electric pump if breastfeeding and plan to pump at all - I used Medela
Bouncy seat / swing/ etc. - really only need one but I do think it's helpful to have one to use
Play Mat
Not necessary -
Boppy Pillow - I had both a breastfriend pillow and boppy at first as they were given to me. The breastfriend worked great for breastfeeding and I highly recommend, especially for first time nursing moms. Boppy was pretty useless to me, did use it a little to sit the baby in on the floor but there are a ton of other things you can use for that instead of purchasing a special pillow.
Wipes warmer
Bottle warmer - I mostly nursed but when I did use bottles, just made them with luke warm water or had the ready made liquid. Might be helpful if you are exclusively bottle feeding
Diaper genie/ pail - we live in suburban neighborhood. just took the poopy diapers right outside and the pee ones after a day or two would take out the little trash can.
Bottles - if bottle feeding, would recommend just getting a couple and trying before buying a bunch of one brand because sometimes babies are particular with these
Crib mobile
I also found it generally a waste of money to buy fancier outfits for the first few months. The baby is so tiny and I mostly put both of my babies in comfortable cotton clothing, they wore a lot of footed sleepers, one pieces, and onesies/pants. Not much of dresses, jean type pants, shoes, etc. They are sleeping a lot the first few months.
Hope that helps.