November 2015 Moms

The talk of when to come in.

so I know it's still early and most your OBs or midwives probably haven't had this talk with you yet but mine did at my 30wk appointment. It's the "when to head in" talk. I tried my best but had to laugh at the newest midwife of the birthing team. They like us to labor as much as we can at home before coming in. When I told her my commute is 30-40 min away she started to tell me when my contractions are 5-6 minutes apart to head in. She obviously didn't read the notes very well and at this point I was laughing, oh honey I don't get that pleasure, I start at 3-4 min apart and progress very fast! Once I can time them I am headed in. My last was 3 hours only, my babies come within 20 min of water breaking. I just hope I make it to the center in time!!

Midwife: "um ya you should come in right when it starts"

Have you had the talk yet?
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Re: The talk of when to come in.

  • I'm 32 weeks on Tuesday and we haven't had the talk yet!!
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  • No but I am super interested In what this Ob office recommends my first two were born in Kansas and this little lady will be born in Indiana. So far lots of things have been different but I don't want to be pushy and bring it up before my Dr is ready.
  • I too have a fairly decent commute to the hospital i'm giving birth at, i haven't had the discussion with my OB yet but my next apt is on the 16th I might bring it up to her then. I'd like to know what they recommend since this will be my first child, and the rumor is that typically your labors are much longer with your first-- rather than subsequent babies.
    BabyName Ticker
  • I have heard this also but haven't had the talk yet. My plan was just to go immediately after water breaking. I don't want any mishaps. 
    Do unto others. 
  • mamavbs said:

    I have heard this also but haven't had the talk yet. My plan was just to go immediately after water breaking. I don't want any mishaps. 

    It's not extremely common for your waters to break first. Definitely not as common as Hollywood portrays! My waters didn't break until 9cm, I personally do not have any friends who's waters have broken first. It might be good for you to check out the other signs of labour so you're aware!
    With my first two deliveries the Dr broke my water. I am highly expecting for that to be the case my third time around. Don't wait for your water to break because it most likely won't happen as pp have pointed out ☺️

  • I have heard this also but haven't had the talk yet. My plan was just to go immediately after water breaking. I don't want any mishaps. 

    Water breaking only occurs about 20% of the time and doesn't necessarily start labor. If it's not early and you don't have strep b your doctor may encourage you to take your time.
  • urby87urby87 member
    edited September 2015
    I have heard this also but haven't had the talk yet. My plan was just to go immediately after water breaking. I don't want any mishaps. 
    Water breaking only occurs about 20% of the time and doesn't necessarily start labor. If it's not early and you don't have strep b your doctor may encourage you to take your time.
    My mom was in labor with both pregnancies without realizing it (mistook real contractions for BH), so clearly there was no broken water to act as a warning for her.  We both arrived within a few hours of her being at the hospital (which was only happenstance, as she was scheduled for inductions).  I would definitely second the advice to look for other signs of labor instead of waiting for your water to break.
  • With my second, My water broke, and within 2min contractions started and were only 5min apart. From water break to delivery was 25hours. I too am an hour away from hospital, and since this will be my second VBAC my ob doesn't like me to labour at home for very long. She likes me to be monitored. So we will see how this one goes. :)
    image BabyFruit Ticker VOTE on my Name List
  • Nope, haven't had that talk yet (I'm 31w tomorrow). But I know i'd definitely like to labor at home as long as possible (and just have like a 15 min commute to the hospital). 
  • Haven't had the talk but I plan on laboring as much as possible at home, unless my water breaks then I have been advised to come in immediatley. I also live 5 minutes from the hospital. 

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • One of my practice's midwives told me at my first appointment that I should labor at home as long as possible to avoid a c section.  I think that's all the talk I'll get from this office.
  • Wahhhhhh---you mean Juno and Knocked Up lied to me? I actually didn't know that, my OB has not discussed labor with me yet. Maybe at the next appointment. 
    Do unto others. 
  • One of my practice's midwives told me at my first appointment that I should labor at home as long as possible to avoid a c section.  I think that's all the talk I'll get from this office.
    I don't understand what labouring at home has to do with needing or not needing a c section???
    I was given the impression that the OBs don't like waiting around for long labors.  The hospital has a very high c section rate, unfortunately its the most advanced in the area so I don't have many options.
  • OB is very organized, we have talked about everything. I start my weekly NSTs this Wednesday, my c-section is schedule but if I go early depending where I am we come try V-Bac.. Feels good to have everything set.


  • One of my practice's midwives told me at my first appointment that I should labor at home as long as possible to avoid a c section.  I think that's all the talk I'll get from this office.

    I don't understand what labouring at home has to do with needing or not needing a c section???

    I was given the impression that the OBs don't like waiting around for long labors.  The hospital has a very high c section rate, unfortunately its the most advanced in the area so I don't have many options.

    That kinda sucks!!
    image BabyFruit Ticker VOTE on my Name List
  • Wahhhhhh---you mean Juno and Knocked Up lied to me? I actually didn't know that, my OB has not discussed labor with me yet. Maybe at the next appointment. 
    It is YOUR job to educate yourself in labor and birth, it the doctors to catch the baby. Please read a book.
    I majorly disagree.  I think its the doctors responsibility to tell you to call them and/or go to the hospital if x, y or z happens, because what they want you to do can vary based on hospital practices (see my above post about my hospital's c section rate) and your personal health situation (high risk patients will be instructed to go in sooner and/or to look out for other warning signs that low-risk patients don't need to bother with).  In fact, the BOOK that my office gave me only says to follow my doctors instructions when it comes to labor progression and when to head to the hospital.
    That is true each practice has a go to the hospital list however not knowing anything about how labor and delivery works in the third ttrimester is absolutely BSC.
  • mamavbs said:

    I have heard this also but haven't had the talk yet. My plan was just to go immediately after water breaking. I don't want any mishaps. 

    It's not extremely common for your waters to break first. Definitely not as common as Hollywood portrays! My waters didn't break until 9cm, I personally do not have any friends who's waters have broken first. It might be good for you to check out the other signs of labour so you're aware!
    This. Mine broke on its own a few hours into labor. I think I was about 4-5cm. It seemed pretty early.
  • Looking forward to the talk tomorrow!
    I have had smaller versions of this talk but not the actual talk!
  • I have a 45 minute drive in non rush hour so I go when they are between 8 to 10 minutes apart or if my water breaks. With my daughter her heartrate dropped below 80 at only 3 cm so I'll be monitored closer this time and I'm attempting VBac!
  • Mine told me 5 mins apart but I live less than a half mile from the hospital I'm delivering at so I was told if I can and want to, to labor a little longer after those start but obviously not a whole lot longer and just go off of how I'm feeling at that time. Not sure what that means as I'm sure it's not going to be pleasant either way, but we'll see lol
  • Just a heads up, contractions and dialating don't add up evenly. With my first 2 by the time I got to the hospital my contractions were 2-3 min apart BUT I was only dialated to a 2!! I was so afraid they were going to send me home. But I was way to far into active labor for that. I was also one where with my first child my water broke at home then contractions started an hour later. With my last 2 my water broke at the end and baby was born 20 min later.
  • I'm the odd one who's water broke before contractions started. In fact, I had to be induced because I wasn't going into labor myself. Your water breaking is an indication to go straight to the hospital for infection reasons BUT if your contractions are starting, it's definitely not what to measure when you should go to hospital :) 5mins apart is fairly standard I think.

    I also took a prenatal weekend class at my hospital and it was awesome! I'm a nurse and I learned a lot. Haven't done it for round 2 again but Id highly recommend it. It's totally different being the patient ;)
  • My hospital said to come in when contractions are 4-5 mins apart lasting for a minute each for at least an hour. For me that was 20 hours into labor. My water didn't break until I was at the hospital (then still had 10 more hours of labor).

    Not sure if this will be the same plan this time since I'm already on bedrest for almost constant contractions.
  • oliarnmom1517oliarnmom1517 member
    edited September 2015
    My doctor hasn't had this conversation with me yet... During appointments she is only in the room for maybe 5 minutes unless I have questions then she will stay a few extra minutes and answer those questions but she's more concerned about my pregnancy then my questions about hospital stuff..
  • VexedMommyVexedMommy member
    edited September 2015
    It's each woman's responsibility to know at least the basics of what's going on with her body.  You are the best advocate for yourself and your child.  If you're ignorant of what is typical or what to expect, you may not get the help you and/or your child need when you need it.  Your OB is responsible for telling you his/her/your hospital's preferences, not teaching you biology. 
    If there's something strange underneath the hood.  Who you gonna call?  Your Doctor.  If there's something weird and it don't look good.  Who you gonna call?  Your Doctor.  Immediately.  If it's new, painful, and possibly pregnancy related get your ass off the internet and call your doctor.  It's for your health and your child's. 




  • One of my practice's midwives told me at my first appointment that I should labor at home as long as possible to avoid a c section.  I think that's all the talk I'll get from this office.
    I don't understand what labouring at home has to do with needing or not needing a c section???
    I was given the impression that the OBs don't like waiting around for long labors.  The hospital has a very high c section rate, unfortunately its the most advanced in the area so I don't have many options.
    Be careful with this comment - my hospital also has a very high c section rate and it's BECAUSE it's the most advanced in the area. Meaning - they see way more high risk moms and babies than the average hospital and those are the patients more likely to need life saving c-sections. It's not just that they can't be bothered with vaginally deliveries most of the time. I'm not trying to sound argumentative, there are just a lot of misconceptions about this kind of thing, so it's good to be aware. 
  • I'm just about 32 weeks & my OB & I had this discussion at my last appointment. She said to come in after my contractions have been 5 minutes apart for one hour.

    My mother is an L&D nurse, & she said the best time to head in is when the contractions stop you in your tracks & you can no longer hold a conversation mid-contraction. 

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • It's each woman's responsibility to know at least the basics of what's going on with her body.  You are the best advocate for yourself and your child.  If you're ignorant of what is typical or what to expect, you may not get the help you and/or your child need when you need it.  Your OB is responsible for telling you his/her/your hospital's preferences, not teaching you biology. 

    See that's my issue is she won't even really communicate that with me.. I do know the basics though however my hospital questions get ignored on a regular basis.. And she hasn't even tried to bring it up before.. I have more questions about hospital stuff then I do about labor or bodily issues of that make sense..
  • We haven't had the talk yet with my midwife but in my birthing classes and books I've read it seems the rule of thumb is 4-1-1...so contractions are 4 minutes apart, 1 minute in length and have gone on for about 1 hour.

    I'm not an expert or anything and I've never done this before so I'm sure I'll end up going in earlier just to be sure!
  • Ask your hospital their policy for admittance too. With DS1 they didn't admit until 5cm due to limited L&D rooms. I got sent home 3 times. I haven't toured the hospital I'm delivering at this time yet, but that will be one of my first questions. AND if you live far away (I was an hour away with my first) make arrangements. With DS1 once I had my membranes stripped and lost my mucous plug so we checked into a hotel and stayed there until I was admitted, much better than driving back and forth.
  • This thread is interesting to me, because in a STM, but was induced the first time, so this will be my first experience going into labor naturally. I'm also moving to a bigger area at 36 weeks, so it will be interesting how different the L&D unit is there.

  • I'm just about 32 weeks & my OB & I had this discussion at my last appointment. She said to come in after my contractions have been 5 minutes apart for one hour.


    My mother is an L&D nurse, & she said the best time to head in is when the contractions stop you in your tracks & you can no longer hold a conversation mid-contraction. 

    This.

    Also... No one ever told me this so I'm going to tell you guys. They tell you to time contractions and that they should be every 4 mins or so when it's really kicked off. BUT my contractions were never consistent. They bounced between every 2 mins then every 5. My husband timed them on his phone and afterwards we had a look and they had no real textbook pattern. It was difficult to time, So let your body lead you!
  • TacoSarahTacoSarah member
    edited September 2015
    I've been told to go in when the contractions are 4 minutes apart and lasting 45 - 60 seconds. I would like to be able to labour at home as long as possible. Home is comforting and I can do what I want, get in the bath tub, mop the floor, watch tv, cook, eat, move from room to room. The thought of being stuck in a delivery room for hours gives me cabin fever and I know when I'm in pain I'm not good trapped in one place and I will need distractions. 
  • Side note, I downloaded this app my mom told me about called "Full Term" that lets you easily keep track of your contractions. Then you can send them to your doctor or midwife. You just press a button when they start and stop.
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