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June 2015 Moms
henrytviii
member
Working Mom Check In - Maternity Leaves Ending?
henrytviii
member
I wasn't sure how to title this because we are all working really hard right now and will be for many years to come. As some of us approach the end of our way too short maternity leaves I wanted to check in and see how everyone's feeling about it. Challenges? Concerns?
LO is 5 weeks tomorrow. I am due back at work a week from today, working from noon to 8pm. Baby and 3 year old will be home with DS, who has just begun to do a little bit of baby care. I'm really not sure how I feel about going back. I do feel like it will be a nice break, easier than being at home. But I'm not sure I'm ready to leave my boys. My body finally feels recovered and up to it but I'm not getting much sleep and its going to be hard to be on my feet most of the day. I may go back full time for 2 weeks to catchup and then try to drop to part time for another few weeks. I dread pumping.
LO is 5 weeks tomorrow. I am due back at work a week from today, working from noon to 8pm. Baby and 3 year old will be home with DS, who has just begun to do a little bit of baby care. I'm really not sure how I feel about going back. I do feel like it will be a nice break, easier than being at home. But I'm not sure I'm ready to leave my boys. My body finally feels recovered and up to it but I'm not getting much sleep and its going to be hard to be on my feet most of the day. I may go back full time for 2 weeks to catchup and then try to drop to part time for another few weeks. I dread pumping.
Re: Working Mom Check In - Maternity Leaves Ending?
ETA: grammar is hard when sleep deprived
I'm impressed with those back at work at 6 weeks! I could do it with LO but with DS I was definitely not recovered. I hope you all had smooth recoveries and quick healing!
I also dread dropping LO off at the sitter's. I think it's because I know I am providing a language rich environment for him and I hope the sitter can do the same because this is the prime time for language learning! I also know that so many firsts will happen and I hate the thought of missing them!
I go back to work tomorrow! Even though the first day of school is technically on the 18th I have to go in sooner for trainings, lesson planning and getting my classroom ready. I was really looking forward to it. This past week I was thinking about the lessons I want teach and I've pretty much planned out what I'll be doing for the first couple weeks of school. I even got some new supplies for my classroom. I've been out of work for a while so getting ready for school was really exciting for me.
Then today LO had his first little laugh. He was looking at me and smiling. So many cute little big smiles. We even had a "conversation" where I spoke in words and he responded in coos while just staring at me like I'm magic.
Then I became a crying mess. Now I don't know if I want to go back. I'm going to miss him so hard tomorrow.
I think I have enough pumped milk at home, but I wouldn't be surprised if LO goes through my whole pumped stash really quickly, leaving none for emergencies.
Also it will be tough to have a productive busy day at work tomorrow, on what I am sure will be too little sleep. Supposed to walk with a walker for one more week (though I am walking around the house without it, and I don't think I need it anymore). It was hard to meet my productivity requirements even before I had my baby; can't imagine how tough it will be now. I NEED to get all my work done by 4 pm since that is when my husband will pick me up with LO, so he can go to his evening class. Even before I had my baby, it would have been hard for me to finish a whole day's work by 4. But now I have to do it and take pumping breaks, too.
If I knew LO would be completely fine in my absence, I would be relieved and glad to get out of the house and be around other adults. I don't worry about missing milestones or time with LO because I know I'll have more time with him (Friday-Sunday this week I'm off). And I'm quitting this job at the end of August, and will have most of September with him till I start school. So I know I will "make up" the missed time with him. And it really will be good to talk with my coworkers and the residents again after so long...
My first day back is supposed to be tomorrow, but I'm taking another six weeks off. I did go to my classroom today to meet with my sub, and when I got home I kind of felt guilty, like I should go back to start the school year because I'm (for the most part) recovered. But I just told myself to enjoy the rest of my time off with the baby AND I still don't have the entire child care situation determined yet. :-SS
@heidiiwa my LO is the same way where I'm the only one that can really calm him down. Tomorrow will be DH's first day alone with the baby and toddler. Should be interesting.
I just read your other post about daycare. Don't worry! I cried all the way to work the first day I dropped off my first son, but just think about the snuggles you'll get right after school. And one of the bonuses about teaching (at my school) is we're out at 2:20. I used to tell myself I still get half the afternoon and the whole evening with LO.
Good luck tomorrow!
At least you got to meet with your sub so I'm sure your students will be in good hands.
Enjoy that extra time off and savor each day with your LO!
ETA good point about getting out in the afternoon! I get off at 3. Thinking about that makes me feel a little better about starting work again.
Also I know I'll be more empathetic with labor patients but I'm just concerned my head will be at home and not in the game.
I have been pumping daily before LO's 5:30 am feeding to build my stash. Once a week I leave the house and have DH or MIL bottle feed LO. He is accepting the bottle so the sitter will bottle feed during the day and I will breastfeed during other times.
Good luck this week @CillyMama!
2nd round exp 8/20/18.
& @KonaCoffeeBean pumping at works sucks majorly. I'm waiting to ask my Assistant Principal if she thinks I should mention where I'm going to my kids. It's so awkward walking out with my bag.
The highlight of the day was that DH came by to pick me up and brought LO to me so I could see him! The first thing DH said when he saw me was that the day was difficult for him taking care of the boys. Apparently LO didn't nap very well and only took one bottle and the toddler didn't nap at all. When he said, "I don't know how you do it!", I felt so validated! It's too bad he can't bring LO to me every day. That would make things so much easier and I wouldn't have to pump as much.
@krystleshel I don't think you have to mention anything specific to your students if you don't want to. When I first had to pump after having DS1, some of my students were curious because I'd be locked up in my room with a 'do not disturb' sign on my door. If they ask I'd simply say I have some personal things to take care of.
So now I guess the real test will be when school actually starts!
Sorry for the rant! I hope everyone else is getting along better than I am!
2nd day yesterday--I pumped every 3 hours at work, and crazy amounts came out of each breast--I filled all the containers I'd brought and even contemplated going to Walmart to buy more storage containers during lunch! Used a different bathroom where I could at least sit on the lid! Unfortunately, it was a busy day with a staff meeting and a trainee who was shadowing me so I didn't have time for Walmart and barely had time to pump. Experienced the feeling of engorgement and letdown while away from baby which made me really hormonal and depressed until I could be reunited with baby. Hurried home. Baby had taken the bottles better this time but had still cried a lot and fought sleep for DH, only having one brief nap during the day. DH left for his evening class and I really enjoyed my time with baby...he was so sweet and precious after having been separated...I just wanted to cuddle and nurse him, and he wanted the same. After BF he slept really well for me and I appreciated how strong our bond is and how well breastfeeding is working for us...now it is very comfortable and relaxing to BF, very different from the early days when I was in so much pain. And LO loves breastfeeding so much, always has. I had brought some work home with me and was able to do it while LO was sleeping. So happy with him.
Only 2 more days of work this week and my days will be shorter now that the trainee is able to take over some of my workload. My paycheck will be less than it used to be but I really don't care.
Grateful that DH and LO are figuring things out together and I can be assured LO is safe with him. Probably each day will be a little better with DH learning by trial and error what works to calm LO other than breastfeeding and LO learning to be comforted by something other than breastfeeding. Although I wish for a longer mat leave I think in a way this is a positive thing for us. I had been so trapped at home and preoccupied with everything related to new motherhood, now I can have more perspective and exposure to the outside world again. I feel terrible that LO is crying and difficult to console during the day, but in the long run, he will need to learn to settle with caregivers other than me, and he needs to bond with DH too, so although painful temporarily, once we get through this I think we will have a more solid and realistic foundation as a 3 person family. It was too unbalanced when I was doing all the baby work.