Someone just told me the other day that the first few times she breastfed hurt worse than the labor, because of it making the uterus contract.... It kind of scared me lol
Any experienced moms to weigh in?
I just weaned my 15 month old twins. They were early and little, with tiny mouths and bad latches. The first 3 weeks or so I literally screamed most times I breastfed and was in excruciating pain for almost all of the time they were nursing, which was 8 hours a day, plus 4 hours a day of pumping, which was just as bad. But we worked it out (thank god for lactation consultants!), it stopped hurting, and my girls got 15 months of breastfeeding. (Would have gone longer but pregnancy sapped my supply and made the babies lose interest) breastfeeding is painful for most new moms, but so doable for most (again, lactation consultants are amazing). Most moms of healthy, full sized babies won't have the trouble I had, but I think it's the rare mom who thinks it's all butterflies and sparkles from day one. But trust me, it gets easier and becomes really sweet and pleasant. And it's so good for the baby, way cheaper than formula, and so much easier than heating and cleaning bottles all day.
As to pain from tightening the uterus, I don't recall any pain from that, but honestly, the first week postpartum was more painful than labor (you pee fire. It's awful. I'm sorry.) so I wouldn't have noticed a little more pain. Breastfeeding does help your uterus shrink back, which is nice for losing weight and starting to feel and look like a person again.
As to the dryness, at the beginning I was much drier, but it slowly ticked back to normal (maybe when the babies started on solids and were nursing less but I don't remember.)
We had sex about 4.5 weeks postpartum. I was on pelvic rest from about halfway through my pregnancy so we weren't waiting any longer than that.
THIS! I had the same painful breastfeeding experience, but pumping wasn't as bad, so I quit after 2&1/2 weeks and exclusively pumped.
I didn't have any uterus pain either, I was dry until about 6mo also, which was also when I quit pumping.
For me it was the skin of the nipple. Thankfully I never had a clogged duct or mastitis. Though when you engorge a couple days postpartum it all hurts. They just get so full that the pressure feels like everything is being squeezed.
What exactly hurts when breastfeeding? The nipple itself or the ducts and stuff inside the breast? Is pumping a similar feeling?
For me it was bloody cracked nipples and the fact nursing is pretty much round the clock. To make things worse I couldn't sit because of the tailbone pain. Many calls and visits to the LC finally helped with the nipple issues.
To be honest it was hard as f*ck for me and I felt a bit blindsided by it all. Add on top of everything else a sleep deprivation that is beyond what words can explain. I don't say all this to scare anyone. I wish I knew more about PP before going through it. But maybe you just need to go through it to understand. But it gets better and better and you get through it. All of a sudden your baby is a year old. I honestly think I'll have a much better time this time bc I at least know what to expect. And I love my DD more than anything and would go through much worse for her. :x
@krisdee123 For me it was cracked scabbed nipples that hurt and feeling super engorged or full.
What are we doing?! I totally agree and the first 4ish months you will probably still think, what have I gotten myself into! My dd is 1 now and it is so so worth it! Seriously nothing compares to the love I have for her... Honestly, Not even the love I have for DH.
Your actual nipple hurts. Think about something sucking on it almost constantly and of course it's going to hurt. I think the whole "if it hurts you are doing it wrong" is bullshit. Obviously there are bad latches that can cause pain but I think your nipples need to just be toughened up. With my first it hurt for about a month more on just one side. With my second child it only hurt for about a week.
Use the lactation consultants!! They can make sure you have a good latch.
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Oh geez. This all really sounds delightful. What are we doing again?
At least you're forewarned. Btw, if you end up with a c/s you won't be able to stand up straight for a few days afterward. Recliners are your friend. Also, the ab muscle pain. And you'll want a pillow for the car seatbelt. I wish I'd known that beforehand.
Wait, I have a question about the PP poop! (heh heh pp poop...I'm an idiot.)
I read a fair amount of the attached thread, and some of it out loud to my DH in the car yesterday. (Digression: He's one of those men who can't fathom that anything but rainbow and glitter can come out of a woman. When I fart, he blames it on the dogs. When he tells me he wants some sexy time, and I try to tell him that I'm constipated so I'm too uncomfortable to bone, he goes "GROSS STOP IT!" So I'm kind of looking forward to the mayhem of childbirth because he's really in for a world of hurt. I say that with love.)
Now, to make the PP poop less of a disaster, should I start taking Colace every day around my due date? The idea of having to bear down ever again after pushing out a human seems borderline unfair...but I'm just a dramatic and terrified FTM.
I tore but not too badly it was nothing compared the nipple pain. DD had a terrible latch and we saw LC after LC and couldn't get it right. I looked like someone dragged me across a parking lot topless. We used a shield for 2 months but I wasn't making enough milk and we went to formula. Those few months were so stressful and horrible because I felt so guilty I couldn't breast feed. This time around if it's going down that path im switching to formula and calling it a day.
We had sex 8 weeks after on valentines day. No one warned me my boobs would spray everywhere when I climaxed so be warned. (The only time they would work apparently )
Wait, I have a question about the PP poop! (heh heh pp poop...I'm an idiot.)
I read a fair amount of the attached thread, and some of it out loud to my DH in the car yesterday. (Digression: He's one of those men who can't fathom that anything but rainbow and glitter can come out of a woman. When I fart, he blames it on the dogs. When he tells me he wants some sexy time, and I try to tell him that I'm constipated so I'm too uncomfortable to bone, he goes "GROSS STOP IT!" So I'm kind of looking forward to the mayhem of childbirth because he's really in for a world of hurt. I say that with love.)
Now, to make the PP poop less of a disaster, should I start taking Colace every day around my due date? The idea of having to bear down ever again after pushing out a human seems borderline unfair...but I'm just a dramatic and terrified FTM.
They give you stool softener at the hospital after birth, in preparation for the big poop. I wouldn't want to take anything like that before labor... If you know what I mean.
Ditto they typically give you Colace or some type of stool softener after labor to help you with pooping. I think it's more of a mind game. You are afraid you're going to rip things down there when in reality you just need to do it. The second time around was much easier than the first because I knew it would be OK. But it still is not fun.
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The weeks after having a baby are terrible or at least they were for me. I think the sleep deprivation is the worst part. The bleeding goes on for a long time. Breastfeeding is very painful. I did have cramping in my uterus from the breastfeeding but they told me it is a good thing because it means the uterus is shrinking back to normal.
I am so glad I stuck it out with the breastfeeding though. It gets so much easier. I always start with a nipple shield for the first few months although lactation consultants don't really like them. It was the only way I could get through the sore nipples.
With my first, sex was painful until I quit breastfeeding at nine months. I was told that breastfeeding puts your body into a menopause-like state, which causes vaginal dryness. I was given an estrogen cream, but that ended up drying up my milk supply. The vaginal dryness didn't happen with my second and I breastfed him longer. I also am not trying to turn anyone away from breastfeeding! That was such a great experience for me after the first couple months of pain even if it meant sex was painful!
I don't not have as much sensation during sex since having my babies and I sometimes wonder if it's because I am not as tight. I'm too scared to ask my husband. I don't really want to know if he doesn't enjoy sex as much.
I never had a problem with the post partum poop. I've never torn that far though.
I tore but not too badly it was nothing compared the nipple pain. DD had a terrible latch and we saw LC after LC and couldn't get it right. I looked like someone dragged me across a parking lot topless. We used a shield for 2 months but I wasn't making enough milk and we went to formula. Those few months were so stressful and horrible because I felt so guilty I couldn't breast feed. This time around if it's going down that path im switching to formula and calling it a day.
We had sex 8 weeks after on valentines day. No one warned me my boobs would spray everywhere when I climaxed so be warned. (The only time they would work apparently )
Dying
The big poop for me was the one in the table and I've mentioned that somewhere in these threads before. Just don't eat a block of cheese a week before your due date like me.
Agree with sticking w the breastfeeding if you can. It eventually was easy and natural. Once I went back to work I had supply issues and only made it to 5 months. But I was proud I made it that far. Whatever you can do will be just fine. The LCs and the My Breastfriend really helped me stick to it through the issues.
Just a random tidbit: I learned (after crying on the pot at age 11 due to a massive infection that hospitalized me) that if you ever have any pain in your vagina from peeing, lean as far forward as possible. I'm talking, bend in half on the toilet. Since your urethra is in front of your vagina (and most tearing happens at the back of the vagina anyway) leaning forward can help keep urine away from your tears and reduce burning.
Just an FYI to anyone who really struggled with the pee-burning like I did. It's not a super comfy way to pee, but neither is crying from burning
If you have a vaginal delivery take one to two warm baths in dreft (the baby laundry detergent) a day. I had a third degree tear and my doctor suggested this. I was never in any pain and healed amazingly!
As for the first poo, most of it will be in your head! I had myself so worked up and scared I'm sure I made it ten times worse. Once it finally happened it was nothing to be concerned about.
This was an excellent post!! Don't start being nervous about labor and delivery yet! We have time for that and it's not nearly as bad as your brain will make it out to be!
On the pee and poop subject, I heard somewhere what you arent allowed or able to wipe, which with all the stitched makes sense. So my question.. What do you do... This may be a silly one but I cant understand how you would feel clean.
On the pee and poop subject, I heard somewhere what you arent allowed or able to wipe, which with all the stitched makes sense. So my question.. What do you do... This may be a silly one but I cant understand how you would feel clean.
You have to pat not swipe.
I had a very rough labor and a big baby (I think I tore, I never asked the doc and I never looked). Pooping was hard for me for at least 2 weeks. I was in tears it was so painful. Not to scare any of you, some said it was totally fine, everyone is different!
On the pee and poop subject, I heard somewhere what you arent allowed or able to wipe, which with all the stitched makes sense. So my question.. What do you do... This may be a silly one but I cant understand how you would feel clean.
I was given a squirt bottle that you fill with warm water to clean yourself. Then you Blot with tp, but not a wiping motion.
On the pee and poop subject, I heard somewhere what you arent allowed or able to wipe, which with all the stitched makes sense. So my question.. What do you do... This may be a silly one but I cant understand how you would feel clean.
They give you a squirt bottle which is heaven on the stitches especially with warm water. You don't really have to wipe/pat either because you are going to be putting on a pad for a while
On the pee and poop subject, I heard somewhere what you arent allowed or able to wipe, which with all the stitched makes sense. So my question.. What do you do... This may be a silly one but I cant understand how you would feel clean.
They give you a squirt bottle which is heaven on the stitches especially with warm water. You don't really have to wipe/pat either because you are going to be putting on a pad for a while
I loved the squirt bottled. Makes me wonder why Americans don't use bidets!
On the pee and poop subject, I heard somewhere what you arent allowed or able to wipe, which with all the stitched makes sense. So my question.. What do you do... This may be a silly one but I cant understand how you would feel clean.
The peri bottle is fabulous! And with all the bleeding/swelling/issues down there it's hard to truly feel clean for a few days. Ice packs, pads and stretchy underwear will be what is the norm for a little while!
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On the pee and poop subject, I heard somewhere what you arent allowed or able to wipe, which with all the stitched makes sense. So my question.. What do you do... This may be a silly one but I cant understand how you would feel clean.
They give you a squirt bottle which is heaven on the stitches especially with warm water. You don't really have to wipe/pat either because you are going to be putting on a pad for a while
I loved the squirt bottled. Makes me wonder why Americans don't use bidets!
I'm not gonna lie, I can't tell from looking at them how they are intended to be used...
On the pee and poop subject, I heard somewhere what you arent allowed or able to wipe, which with all the stitched makes sense. So my question.. What do you do... This may be a silly one but I cant understand how you would feel clean.
They give you a squirt bottle which is heaven on the stitches especially with warm water. You don't really have to wipe/pat either because you are going to be putting on a pad for a while
I loved the squirt bottled. Makes me wonder why Americans don't use bidets!
I'm not gonna lie, I can't tell from looking at them how they are intended to be used...
LOL I'm not sure I've ever seen one in person. But it sounds amazing. Think about it- if you got poo anywhere else on your body would you just wipe it with a dry piece of toilet paper and call it day? I think not. For someone who doesn't talk much about poo IRL, I sure talk a lot about it with you ladies. :-S
On the pee and poop subject, I heard somewhere what you arent allowed or able to wipe, which with all the stitched makes sense. So my question.. What do you do... This may be a silly one but I cant understand how you would feel clean.
They give you a squirt bottle which is heaven on the stitches especially with warm water. You don't really have to wipe/pat either because you are going to be putting on a pad for a while
I loved the squirt bottled. Makes me wonder why Americans don't use bidets!
I'm not gonna lie, I can't tell from looking at them how they are intended to be used...
LOL I'm not sure I've ever seen one in person. But it sounds amazing. Think about it- if you got poo anywhere else on your body would you just wipe it with a dry piece of toilet paper and call it day? I think not. For someone who doesn't talk much about poo IRL, I sure talk a lot about it with you ladies. :-S
You think you're talking about it a lot now? Wait til that baby comes out.
On the pee and poop subject, I heard somewhere what you arent allowed or able to wipe, which with all the stitched makes sense. So my question.. What do you do... This may be a silly one but I cant understand how you would feel clean.
They give you a squirt bottle which is heaven on the stitches especially with warm water. You don't really have to wipe/pat either because you are going to be putting on a pad for a while
I loved the squirt bottled. Makes me wonder why Americans don't use bidets!
I'm not gonna lie, I can't tell from looking at them how they are intended to be used...
LOL I'm not sure I've ever seen one in person. But it sounds amazing. Think about it- if you got poo anywhere else on your body would you just wipe it with a dry piece of toilet paper and call it day? I think not. For someone who doesn't talk much about poo IRL, I sure talk a lot about it with you ladies. :-S
You think you're talking about it a lot now? Wait til that baby comes out.
I'm talking adult, personal poo. I could talk to you all day about my daughter's rainbow poop I'll talk to you even longer about her poop face which cracks me up every time.
Warning TMI, So the 6 week wait is impossible for me anyway, we tried at 2.5 weeks which didn't work and again a week or so later. I only had 1 stich and no burning when I had to use the restroom. But when we tried to have sex it was like there was something blocking my vagina, it hurt pretty bad when he tried to push further in, it felt like he was all the way in but it was barely in at all. We tried a few times until one night I told him to just do it, but it still hurt to do any moving. So we finally figured out if he held my butt up while we were doing it it didn't hurt, we had to do it like this untill about 6 months pp.
After healing everything seems as tight as before, but I do tend to have an issue with dryness now. I think sex is actually better now, but it took about 9 months to get to that point.
I'd suggest using lots of lube the first time you do it.
If you think your boobs hurt while you were pregnant just wait till your milk comes in, it was 3 days of pure torture for me. I honestly handled contractions better then that, it hurt to move and the only way to get any relief was to pump or feed, which I started pumping in between feeding to keep my boobs from getting so full.
I honestly never had any problem with my nipples- I had many visits with a lactation consultant who told me that with proper latch, your nipples should be at the back of baby's throat and not subject to the actual suckling motion, which is what can rub them raw. The only dry skin I got was from my boobs stretching so dang much! I would highly suggest to any moms suffering from actual skin/nipple pain when nursing that you visit a personal lactation consultant who can watch you nurse a few times and make sure that baby is latched properly.
That being said, the feeling of "let down" felt like someone was smooshing my boobs in a freaking clamp or something. Luckily it only lasts for a second or two but DANG. Was not prepared for that!!!
Well, I had a natural birth, Didn't tear all went well. We tried after 4 weeks & that wasn't happening, more psychological. So then we tried at like 5-6 weeks and it was fine. I breastfed for 13 months and my period returned to normal after 3 months adding about 5 days to my cycle. Returned to normal pretty quickly and all is good.
If you have a vaginal delivery take one to two warm baths in dreft (the baby laundry detergent) a day. I had a third degree tear and my doctor suggested this. I was never in any pain and healed amazingly!
As for the first poo, most of it will be in your head! I had myself so worked up and scared I'm sure I made it ten times worse. Once it finally happened it was nothing to be concerned about.
This was an excellent post!! Don't start being nervous about labor and delivery yet! We have time for that and it's not nearly as bad as your brain will make it out to be!
I plan on doing the baths for sure! the less the tear can be or none at all, i'm down for that. plus i plan on being in a tub right up to the point of delivery. i wanted a full blown water birth but i don't have any options through my doctor, that's the closest she was able to give me.
Re: What to expect after birth
I didn't have any uterus pain either, I was dry until about 6mo also, which was also when I quit pumping.
Though when you engorge a couple days postpartum it all hurts. They just get so full that the pressure feels like everything is being squeezed.
For me it was cracked scabbed nipples that hurt and feeling super engorged or full.
What are we doing?! I totally agree and the first 4ish months you will probably still think, what have I gotten myself into! My dd is 1 now and it is so so worth it! Seriously nothing compares to the love I have for her... Honestly, Not even the love I have for DH.
I think the whole "if it hurts you are doing it wrong" is bullshit. Obviously there are bad latches that can cause pain but I think your nipples need to just be toughened up. With my first it hurt for about a month more on just one side. With my second child it only hurt for about a week.
Use the lactation consultants!! They can make sure you have a good latch.
Btw, if you end up with a c/s you won't be able to stand up straight for a few days afterward. Recliners are your friend. Also, the ab muscle pain. And you'll want a pillow for the car seatbelt.
I wish I'd known that beforehand.
I read a fair amount of the attached thread, and some of it out loud to my DH in the car yesterday. (Digression: He's one of those men who can't fathom that anything but rainbow and glitter can come out of a woman. When I fart, he blames it on the dogs. When he tells me he wants some sexy time, and I try to tell him that I'm constipated so I'm too uncomfortable to bone, he goes "GROSS STOP IT!" So I'm kind of looking forward to the mayhem of childbirth because he's really in for a world of hurt. I say that with love.)
Now, to make the PP poop less of a disaster, should I start taking Colace every day around my due date? The idea of having to bear down ever again after pushing out a human seems borderline unfair...but I'm just a dramatic and terrified FTM.
We used a shield for 2 months but I wasn't making enough milk and we went to formula.
Those few months were so stressful and horrible because I felt so guilty I couldn't breast feed.
This time around if it's going down that path im switching to formula and calling it a day.
We had sex 8 weeks after on valentines day. No one warned me my boobs would spray everywhere when I climaxed so be warned. (The only time they would work apparently
I am so glad I stuck it out with the breastfeeding though. It gets so much easier. I always start with a nipple shield for the first few months although lactation consultants don't really like them. It was the only way I could get through the sore nipples.
With my first, sex was painful until I quit breastfeeding at nine months. I was told that breastfeeding puts your body into a menopause-like state, which causes vaginal dryness. I was given an estrogen cream, but that ended up drying up my milk supply. The vaginal dryness didn't happen with my second and I breastfed him longer. I also am not trying to turn anyone away from breastfeeding! That was such a great experience for me after the first couple months of pain even if it meant sex was painful!
I don't not have as much sensation during sex since having my babies and I sometimes wonder if it's because I am not as tight. I'm too scared to ask my husband. I don't really want to know if he doesn't enjoy sex as much.
I never had a problem with the post partum poop. I've never torn that far though.
The big poop for me was the one in the table and I've mentioned that somewhere in these threads before.
Just don't eat a block of cheese a week before your due date like me.
Agree with sticking w the breastfeeding if you can. It eventually was easy and natural. Once I went back to work I had supply issues and only made it to 5 months. But I was proud I made it that far. Whatever you can do will be just fine. The LCs and the My Breastfriend really helped me stick to it through the issues.
Just an FYI to anyone who really struggled with the pee-burning like I did. It's not a super comfy way to pee, but neither is crying from burning
As for the first poo, most of it will be in your head! I had myself so worked up and scared I'm sure I made it ten times worse. Once it finally happened it was nothing to be concerned about.
This was an excellent post!! Don't start being nervous about labor and delivery yet! We have time for that and it's not nearly as bad as your brain will make it out to be!
I had a very rough labor and a big baby (I think I tore, I never asked the doc and I never looked). Pooping was hard for me for at least 2 weeks. I was in tears it was so painful. Not to scare any of you, some said it was totally fine, everyone is different!
I loved the squirt bottled. Makes me wonder why Americans don't use bidets!
For someone who doesn't talk much about poo IRL, I sure talk a lot about it with you ladies.
:-S
That being said, the feeling of "let down" felt like someone was smooshing my boobs in a freaking clamp or something. Luckily it only lasts for a second or two but DANG. Was not prepared for that!!!
EXTREMELY Informational! But equally as terrifying.