Oct 2013 I went in to be induced with baby number 3 .... my first boy. They put in gels in the afternoon and monitored him for an hour or so.... he was going off like a frog in a sock... after that he went quiet... i assumed he went to sleep in prep for birth... early the next morning they went to check on how i was progressing and how Jett was ... they couldnt find his heartbeat.
Thry took me off for emergency csection but were only abld to put him on life support after trying to get a heartbeat for 18 mins ... but by then he was brain dead.
Im now nearly 20 weeks with baby 4 and im constantly waiting for him to die.... its driving me nuts.
I came to the realisation last night that ive also kind of distanced myself emotionally from my 2 girls.... im totally devastated about all of it.
I dont know how to get through this pregnancy and its really killing me