Waiting until birth to find out the gender. Am I the only one?

bjorkdork · June 2015

We're going super old-fashioned with this and waiting until the baby is born to be surprised by the gender. I've only told 3 people (older sister, coworker, and boss) and they've each said I'm crazy. Sissy and coworker asked how are they supposed to know what to buy for the shower? But I still really love the idea of waiting for the birth! Am I the only one? Who else is waiting?

Monilee1017 · June 2015

I didn't find out for my first two. Not sure this time, we will find out when the baby is born or the night before.

bjorkdork · June 2015

Very cool! So glad I'm not the only modern mama who's going old fashioned on this!

enkb · June 2015

Still on the fence. I can see the benefits of waiting, but I'm also really curious. Time will tell I guess.

bjorkdork · June 2015

@enkb There are times I think it would be so much easier for the nursery and the shower, etc, so I'm a little tempted. I'm so glad Hubble is on board with waiting

Flyingtrouble · June 2015

I had a surprise the first time and definitely will again. It was fantastic. I wanted my DH to find out the sex first because we women find out everything else first, when you're pregnant, first kick, first contraction.. To see the excitement and how proud he was to announce to me that we had a girl was worth every person telling me it was inconvenient or old fashioned!

bjorkdork · June 2015

@Flyingtrouble I LOVE that!! That's such an amazing gift to give him! Mind if I copy it? Hehe

GhanimaAtreides · June 2015

This is my 4th but the first time we are team greening it. I'm so much more laid back this time because last time I did some MAJOR gender swaying to get our daughter. I changed my diet for 4 months and tracked my CM pH and everything. Now that we have both genders already, I'm not overly anxious to anticipate one or the other. I guess it also comes into play that I prefer my kids to be 3.5-6 years apart. Plus, there are worse things than a beige, tan, or gray gender-neutral nursery

GhanimaAtreides · June 2015

Oh yeah, people around you demanding to know the gender just feel out of control during your pregnancy. It's selfish on their part.

emililyha · June 2015

I'm a FTM and am more than excited to keep our little darling's gender a secret until birth. I LOVE the idea of letting the hubs tell me the gender. @Flyingtrouble hope it's okay I steal your fantastic idea too!

Flyingtrouble · June 2015

@bjorkdork absolutely go ahead! Trust me it's fabulous.
On the baby shower/nursery issue, there are plenty of gender neutral things people can buy and I'm actually glad because I'm not a huge pink person so if we had known it was a girl and everyone had bought pink stuff as gifts I think I would have died.
I'll post a pic of the nursery in a sec when I find one

tkfeller · June 2015

This is my 4th also and we are not finding out. We found out with the other three and since this may be our last I figured might as well try it at least once. I have 2 girls and a boy so I am happy with either. I love the idea of the dad announcing it to the mom! I may have to copy that too!

amyelise25 · June 2015

We are waiting as well. And we aren't sharing our name choices either. We haven't told many that I am expecting, so I have no clue how annoying people will be. Not that I care.

I think I read on a previous post that not knowing the sex forces people to buy the things you really need instead of buying cutesy gender specific items that may not have been on your register. I like that idea.

Flyingtrouble · June 2015

I was still painting the tree with a week to go!!

cyanope · June 2015

I want to be Team Green, but DH wants to know as soon as he can. I like the idea of him knowing first. Maybe I'll let him find out and swear him to secrecy. He's a steel trap, so I'm sure he would keep it to himself!

GhanimaAtreides · June 2015

cyanope said:
I want to be Team Green, but DH wants to know as soon as he can. I like the idea of him knowing first. Maybe I'll let him find out and swear him to secrecy. He's a steel trap, so I'm sure he would keep it to himself!

Are you sure that won't be awkward? There are other tells, like he's unconcerned with names for one gender, or scoffs at the idea of a down-the-road after the baby's born gender-specific purchase while window shopping. Will his secrecy stand up to a controlling prying MIL? Lol, sorry if this doesn't apply to your guy. Mine has been advocating for at least the envelope thing in case we change our minds, but truth is, I couldn't trust him, he's too type-A. He'd tease me the entire time if he knew and I didn't. Plus I couldn't stand knowing he was figuratively closer to baby, despite my having the baby inside me... such a double standard.

cyanope · June 2015

@Lizzie5831...

No, this wouldn't be an issue with DH. He is literally the best secret-keeper on planet earth, and wouldn't bat an eye in any gender-related scenarios. Plus, we have a boy and girl name picked out already. And as for prying moms, we would just tell everyone that neither one of us know's the sex.

While all of this sounds good in theory to me, in actuality, I probably won't be able to do it. I'm the type-A one in our relationship, so I would probably last for only a week knowing that he knows and I don't...But it sure sounds fun!

LizC216 · June 2015

I think we are going to leave the gender a surprise this time. For my girls, we found out at the 20 week scan. I was convinced I needed to know so I could shop and prepare accordingly. My friend was team green and it's such an awesome surprise. This is most likely our last, so I'd like to experience that surprise. And when I look back, neither of my girls slept in their nurseries until 5 or 6 months. So I could potentially do the nusery once the baby is born so I don't have to do something neutral.

monaclemere · June 2015

We aren't finding out until I deliver. We were surprised with our first two, and we both agree that it's the best, most exciting surprise to have. I have my husband, instead of the doctor, announce the sex when they pull the baby out. It's so suspenseful to have it build the entire pregnancy. I wouldn't do it any other way!

nicolea1222 · June 2015

You're not the only one! We're waiting until the birth to learn the gender. At this point, only family and two close friends know of the pregnancy and they all seem to think we're crazy for not finding out the gender ahead of time. Personally, I'm so scheduled and overly organized in every other aspect of our lives, I'm ecstatic and enjoying the unknown; I'm genuinely appreciating one of life's great surprises : )

peppercorn16 · June 2015

I couldn't do it but I know someone who did! We threw her a "welcome baby" party rather than a baby shower. That way we could buy more personalized and gender-specific items!

adcc43 · June 2015

This is baby 3 for H and I and found out for the first two. This will be the last so we decided to try team green. We currently have a girl and boy. I was so obsessive with knowing during my first 2pregnancies but this time I am so calm about it. I think part of it is bc we have one of each and I had my mind set on not finding out since before BFP.

danasphillips · June 2015

We are waiting to find out. Partially because I really don't have a preference and partially because I'm not a fan of pink, purple, ruffles, or overly "boyish" stuff. The gender neutral gear works out well for us.

jennaymg13 · June 2015

We found out with our first, going old fashioned and waiting this time. I'm excited for the surprise!

stinamarie412 · June 2015

I'm still trying to convince DH to go green this time around. We found out with DD but I want to do things differently this time. DH-not so much. We have plenty of time for me to convince him.

mrsjdonovan · June 2015

We are definitely team green. Life has so few real surprises anymore. I am totally going to steal the idea of DH telling me the sex. Love that idea!!

mom2be2016 · June 2015

We are waiting until the baby is born to find out! This is our first baby, but I think it makes it more exciting!

ByeByeSpotts · June 2015

We are waiting until birth to find out. And we are actually doing the shower when the baby is around 6 months. My sister is getting married in April and we don't want to steal her spotlight. She also is very jealous that we are pregnant, so it's best to do the shower later and then people will know what to get us and they'll get to see the baby! ☺️

amargaret24 · June 2015

I agree with you @WineBaby122 I'm not going to find out because I am not a fan of the super gender specific product. Also not a fan of the way we immediately start encouraging strong gender differences and preferences at an early age. So neutral is cool by me!

ChipMonster · June 2015

Team grey! And I love it. DH told me it was a boy when DS was born. Although I had to ask him. I think he was all caught up in the moment. I'll never forget the look on his face when he told me. It was wonderful! I can't wait to do it all over again.

KaraEpp16 · June 2015

Reading these posts really has me leaning towards team green....I don't want gender specific things picked out by others. That's kind of a scary thought. If I want to dress my kid is ruffles-I feel like I should pick them out. We are already discussing names for both. Maybe we just wait.

PreggoInTheCity · June 2015

FTM and we plan to wait to find out at the birth. I love the idea of having DH tell me! That sounds like such an honor to give him, not to mention what an amazing moment it will be between us. Totally want to steal that idea! If and when we have a second, we talked about likely finding out, but only if we're still in our current house to figure out the logistics of where the kids would all sleep and if we need or move to a bigger house in the burbs or not.

cconrad_2008 · June 2015

We aren't finding out until birth nor are we telling anyone what names we have picked out until after baby is born. My older sister (who is throwing the shower) is very upset with us because she thinks she needs to have a gender specif shower and thinks she needs to know what names we are discussing but quite frankly we don't want anyone else's input on our child's name and with our families we wouldn't hear the end of them trying to convince us for different names and giving their opinions. We are also probably going to be called selfish because as long as we have a "normal" birth (around here mama & baby are usually sent home within 24-48 hours after birth as long as it wasn't a c-section and there were no other complications and baby is healthy) we are going to ask everyone to wait to meet baby until we go home so we can have time to bond with baby ourselves as a new little family and we don't want to deal with family drama.

mollyj931 · June 2015

Team green for us! Our third time. I love the surprise at birth!

Flyingtrouble · June 2015

@cconrad_2008 not selfish at all. We live quite far away from our families (about three thousand miles!!) and we had a week at home together before anyone visited. I think it's important to have that. Also, I had no clue I would be like this but I had huge issues giving baby to others to hold, not if it was my choice but if someone just grabbed her for a cuddle or picked her up when she was crying I would feel sick and angry and it was very very strange and difficult.
Bottom line, don't listen to any pressure from family or friends and invite people when YOU feel comfortable (not your hubby or anyone else) because you will regret it if you cave and it's not what you want.

BBEA2006 · June 2015

We went team green w/ DD and it was the best surprise and experience ever! We are definitely doing it again. That moment is something I will honestl forever treasure.

Rakastajatar · June 2015

I want to wait but my husband wants to know. And he can't keep secrets so it looks I'll know. I'll just weigh in heavy for a name

MrsYoung9311 · June 2015

I need to have DH read this! He wants to know, but I don't. This is my first, but he has a child from a previous relationship so I feel like I should get my way (yes I am a brat). I've given in and said that he can find out but he can't tell anyone. If I find out that anyone else knows out he lets it slip to me there is gonna be HELL to pay X( .

Karenin · June 2015

You're not crazy, that's lovely! I'm not waiting but only because I'm impatient! I would love to wait, but I'd just never get through it without finding out. Also, no one should tell you you're crazy!

daninikicoli · June 2015

We are team green and so looking forward to the surprise! My husband really wanted it this way and I think it's great that he gets to say, "it's a boy/girl." Very exciting stuff!

RoxanneA · June 2015

This is baby #5 and the last. We have two of each and I want to be team green since it's the last opportunity I will get to do so. Dh doesn't think I can do it but I'll show him, lol.

Want a personalized experience?

Waiting until birth to find out the gender. Am I the only one?

Re: Waiting until birth to find out the gender. Am I the only one?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards