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Mom and baby shower

hjphillipshjphillips member
in August 2015 Moms
I have a serious question about a baby shower. I'm ending up having more than one person throw me one; my aunt wants to throw me one, and my MIL wants to throw me a seperate one because it's her first grandchild and she wants family and such on their side to actually come to one.

MIL knows I hate attention and wants it to be low key, so she's thinking about not inviting my mom (my mom is crazy about making things over-the-top and would take it all over). It's MIL's first grandchild, my mom's sixth, it's it's more special for my MIL. I just wanted to know what people thought.

I just don't know what to tell her. I know she doesn't like my mom and I don't want this to be a petty thing, but I also know she doesn't like my mom and I don't want this to be unpleasant.
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Re: Mom and baby shower

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    taylorharber1108taylorharber1108 member
    I would kind of think that your MIL would like to attend your shower that is being thrown by your Aunt. I could be wrong but maybe if you put it to her this way she would understand. Personally I would bring my mom whether she was invited or not. The shower is supposed to be about you and your sweet baby. I say if you want your mom there let your MIL know that she will be coming.
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    Kelsie07UlmerKelsie07Ulmer member
    I had a similar situation with my first. Our families got along fine but they were wanting to do seperate showers. I said absolutely not. One big shower would be fine. I don't like the idea of keeping the families seperate. I would never throw the baby seperate birthday parties for each family so why should the shower be any different?
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    kedbachkedbach member
    I'm having one hosted by my mom and SIL's, as well as one hosted by my MIL and SIL's, and everyone is invited to both. It seems crazy, but I just don't want anyone to feel excluded one way or another. I know my mom would be hurt if I didn't invite her to the one my MIL is hosting, and vice-versa. I'm inviting some friends to both, so they have an option as one will be in VA and the other in NC. I'm with you on that I don't like things being a big deal or a "show", I just want something low-key as well.

    The way I feel, my mom is my mom, and my best friend! I want her involved every step of the way!
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    SaratiffSaratiff member
    Ya I would invite her but with everyone else. She can get an invite in the mail with date and time. Not give her the opportunity to high jack the shower. But It really would be the polite thing to do.
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    tarheelgirl8tarheelgirl8 member
    I think it depends on the location.  If you're MILs shower is located really close to where your mom lives, then it would probably be rude not to invite her.  If it would require a lot of travel for your mom, I think you could get by without inviting her if that's what you want.  Just tell her that since she's already attending your aunt's shower and this would require travel, you didn't want to make her feel like she had to come.  

    If you decide to invite her, I agree with PP who said that you should just send her an invite so that it's planned already by the time she learns about it.
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    netters625netters625 member
    My mom is throwing mine, when my MIL suggested she also host one I flat out said no, she is ok with it but she knows how I am and my personality.
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