October 2015 Moms

Husband and I don't agree on circumcision

124

Re: Husband and I don't agree on circumcision

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  • kayway85 said:

    I did not circumcise my son and I would never ever ever ever do this to a child. To the people saying that adult men had to have their foreskin removed as adults due to infection that is ABSURD. Teach your child to keep his privates clean and this won't be an issue. The evidence that suggests it is medically beneficial is marginal. WATCH a circumcision and then tell me you want that done to your child. It is barbaric and wholly unnecessary.

    Your husband has the foreskin and is obviously attached to his. Maybe you should listen to him.


    Most adults / teens that need to be circumsized are due to phismosis ... Where the foreskin isn't able to retract and won't pull back at all, that can cause serious complications and infections !
  • My husband and I personally are for it. However my tip would be to anyone who does not do it keep up on hygiene. I know it sounds obvious but I work in pediatrics and see it all the time. The parents are responsible for keeping it clean down there for the first few years atleast. Same goes for after the procedure is done but if you don't do it you have to continue to stay on it and make sure to teach your son good hygiene habits too. I would whatever your choice is just know the responsibilities that come with it.

    The problem I had was I told different things by different doctors. Some said to pull the foreskin back and in the hospital I was told not to until ds was older.
  • Omg I couldn't even read very many of these comments and I am so surprised by the lack of knowledge here!!!
    First of all you do NOT, and I mean absolutely DO NOT pull the foreskin back to clean under it. It is fused to the head of the penis, Similar To How A Nail Is fused to a nailbed. That is why during infant circumcision they have to stick a metal instrument between the foreskin and glans to separate them. If you forcibly retract the foreskin before they naturally separate you can cause scar tissue, and cause phimosis. the average age of this is 10, and it is completely normal if they cannot retract any earlier than that. After the forskin naturally seperates from the glans the only thing required to keep it clean is pulling it back and washing with water. That's IT.

    Of course people are going to say it is worse as an adult because a NON CONSENTING infant cannot tell you how much it hurts when it is done and as it is healing. They also do not know if the numbing medication they use on infants actually works because they can not tell us. Adults can be fully numbed and have access to pain management during the healing process. 40% of infant circumcisions come with some type of complication. Adhesions being the number 1 problem. This is the bodies attempt to try and repair itself from the amputation. If this happens it requires you to rip apart the skin from the glans daily, and yes this is painful for them. Also they can take too much skin and this can result in painful erections as an adult. If done as an adult they know exactly how much skin to take. And it also doesn't have to sit in a urine and feces filled diaper during the healing process.
    Any adult male who is circumcised will of course be happy with it because they do not know any different. And I don't know many men who will admit that their manhood might not be all it could be.
    The glans is an internal organ and the foreskin is there to protect it. Smegma is also produced between the foreskin and glans. This is a natural substance and is healthy. It also helps lubricate during sex.

    If properly cared for there is no reason that an uncircumcised penis will have any more problems than a circumcised people is in adulthood.
    Oh by the way I work in the health care field as well. I have worked in a nursing home for years and am currently a nursing student. I see the problems old men have and I can say it is usually because lazy aids do not properly clean under the foreskin. And sorry but old women have problems in the genital area too, it is not only a penis problem.
    Also there is no organization in the world that recommends it. And in europe and many overseas countries they wouldn't even dream of cutting off part of a babies genitals, boy or girl. They also do not have any of the issues that we do here with "required circumcision" due to a bunch of made up problems. The research speaks for itself.
    I think I have addressed most of the common misconceptions about infant circumcision. It is a cosmetic procedure only and should not be done on an infant.

    The peadatrician I was seeing for my son, told us not to pull the foreskin back until he turns 2 ! Then after that easily pull it back and clean under it ! Dr is a bit concerned with his as it is unusually tight and said he may need to be circumsized, if we have another son he will deffinately without a doubt be circumsized at birth !
  • babyohtake2babyohtake2 member
    edited April 2015

    The problem with a majority of pediatricians in this country is that they lack true intact care knowledge. NOBODY should be pulling your son's foreskin back except your son. You will almost undoubtedly get the phony "phimosis" diagnosis and he will recommend circumcision. It is a flat out lie. https://www.drmomma.org/2009/06/how-to-care-for-intact-penis-protect.html?m=1

    This website has a ton of information on intact care.


    The peadatrician I was seeing for my son, told us not to pull the foreskin back until he turns 2 ! Then after that easily pull it back and clean under it ! Dr is a bit concerned with his as it is unusually tight and said he may need to be circumsized, if we have another son he will deffinately without a doubt be circumsized at birth !

  • The peadatrician I was seeing for my son, told us not to pull the foreskin back until he turns 2 ! Then after that easily pull it back and clean under it ! Dr is a bit concerned with his as it is unusually tight and said he may need to be circumsized, if we have another son he will deffinately without a doubt be circumsized at birth !
    https://www.drmomma.org/2010/01/phony-phimosis-diagnosis.html?m=1
    Here is another very good article about the diagnosis that you will probably receive, and why it is wrong.

  • The problem with a majority of pediatricians in this country is that they lack true intact care knowledge. NOBODY should be pulling your son's foreskin back except your son. You will almost undoubtedly get the phony "phimosis" diagnosis and he will recommend circumcision. It is a flat out lie. https://www.drmomma.org/2009/06/how-to-care-for-intact-penis-protect.html?m=1

    This website has a ton of information on intact care.


    The peadatrician I was seeing for my son, told us not to pull the foreskin back until he turns 2 ! Then after that easily pull it back and clean under it ! Dr is a bit concerned with his as it is unusually tight and said he may need to be circumsized, if we have another son he will deffinately without a doubt be circumsized at birth !

    That link mentions pain if pulled back ? My son has never had pain from it being pulled back he's never cried or complained about it, you can't see he entire head like you would an adults ... But you can see the tip of the head and the skin surrounding ! But every pediatrician I've seen mentions not pulling it back till age 2 ! And After 2 gently pull it back to cleanse it !

  • The problem with a majority of pediatricians in this country is that they lack true intact care knowledge. NOBODY should be pulling your son's foreskin back except your son. You will almost undoubtedly get the phony "phimosis" diagnosis and he will recommend circumcision. It is a flat out lie. https://www.drmomma.org/2009/06/how-to-care-for-intact-penis-protect.html?m=1

    This website has a ton of information on intact care.


    The peadatrician I was seeing for my son, told us not to pull the foreskin back until he turns 2 ! Then after that easily pull it back and clean under it ! Dr is a bit concerned with his as it is unusually tight and said he may need to be circumsized, if we have another son he will deffinately without a doubt be circumsized at birth !

    That link mentions pain if pulled back ? My son has never had pain from it being pulled back he's never cried or complained about it, you can't see he entire head like you would an adults ... But you can see the tip of the head and the skin surrounding ! But every pediatrician I've seen mentions not pulling it back till age 2 ! And After 2 gently pull it back to cleanse it !
    There isn't always pain, especially if a small portion of the skin has seperated. But that does not mean you should pull the entire thing back or be messing with it. Like the link said, full retraction is for sexual function and should not be done by parent or doctor

  • The problem with a majority of pediatricians in this country is that they lack true intact care knowledge. NOBODY should be pulling your son's foreskin back except your son. You will almost undoubtedly get the phony "phimosis" diagnosis and he will recommend circumcision. It is a flat out lie. https://www.drmomma.org/2009/06/how-to-care-for-intact-penis-protect.html?m=1

    This website has a ton of information on intact care.


    The peadatrician I was seeing for my son, told us not to pull the foreskin back until he turns 2 ! Then after that easily pull it back and clean under it ! Dr is a bit concerned with his as it is unusually tight and said he may need to be circumsized, if we have another son he will deffinately without a doubt be circumsized at birth !

    That link mentions pain if pulled back ? My son has never had pain from it being pulled back he's never cried or complained about it, you can't see he entire head like you would an adults ... But you can see the tip of the head and the skin surrounding ! But every pediatrician I've seen mentions not pulling it back till age 2 ! And After 2 gently pull it back to cleanse it !
    There isn't always pain, especially if a small portion of the skin has seperated. But that does not mean you should pull the entire thing back or be messing with it. Like the link said, full retraction is for sexual function and should not be done by parent or doctor


    I was just told to pull it back gently and clean it, I was also told not to force it back !
  • We had our son circumsized and I left it up to my husband. I don't have one and really shouldn't have any say in it. He obviously knows more. And as for the procedure, I was extremely emotional and cried my eyes out when they took him. My husband went with him and said they do strap them down but it took like 1 minute. My son was done crying by the time they brought him back to me. Never had any problems ever since. I would for sure do it again but each to their own.
  • AmstreagleAmstreagle member
    edited April 2015
    At the end of the day we're all mothers looking for what works for our family and I respect that regardless if our views differ.
    Good luck to everyone in making the decision that works best for your families!
  • Sorry but they are just wrong. Get literature from other countries where they actually have knowledge of intact care. You could possibly injure your child if you pull it back to clean it. It is not needed. This is the type of thing that make circumcision "necessary" as they get older. Nobody should be messing with it except your son. Only clean what is seen!!!
  • Sorry but they are just wrong. Get literature from other countries where they actually have knowledge of intact care. You could possibly injure your child if you pull it back to clean it. It is not needed. This is the type of thing that make circumcision "necessary" as they get older. Nobody should be messing with it except your son. Only clean what is seen!!!

    None of my nephews were ever injured from having their peckers cleaned nor was my son, and my dr comes from somewhere across the seas, dr susanni, then my family dr is from another part of the world as well ! Dr Zemerli, and dr abenheimer is the only one who see him from Canada, the rest are from away and all say the say thing, don't pull it back till after 2 then gently pull it back to clean it ! My son never mentioned it hurt ever, never said ow, never said anything !
  • Sorry but they are just wrong. Get literature from other countries where they actually have knowledge of intact care. You could possibly injure your child if you pull it back to clean it. It is not needed. This is the type of thing that make circumcision "necessary" as they get older. Nobody should be messing with it except your son. Only clean what is seen!!!

    None of my nephews were ever injured from having their peckers cleaned nor was my son, and my dr comes from somewhere across the seas, dr susanni, then my family dr is from another part of the world as well ! Dr Zemerli, and dr abenheimer is the only one who see him from Canada, the rest are from away and all say the say thing, don't pull it back till after 2 then gently pull it back to clean it ! My son never mentioned it hurt ever, never said ow, never said anything !
    Well obviously do what you want, but I am just telling you the facts that you shouldn't nor do you need to clean it. Do you clean inside a girls vagina? No. Same thing. Self cleaning organ. Just because a doctor is from a different country doesn't mean they are properly educated. I'm talking about practicing doctors in countries that do NOT practice routine infant cutting.
  • Sorry but they are just wrong. Get literature from other countries where they actually have knowledge of intact care. You could possibly injure your child if you pull it back to clean it. It is not needed. This is the type of thing that make circumcision "necessary" as they get older. Nobody should be messing with it except your son. Only clean what is seen!!!

    None of my nephews were ever injured from having their peckers cleaned nor was my son, and my dr comes from somewhere across the seas, dr susanni, then my family dr is from another part of the world as well ! Dr Zemerli, and dr abenheimer is the only one who see him from Canada, the rest are from away and all say the say thing, don't pull it back till after 2 then gently pull it back to clean it ! My son never mentioned it hurt ever, never said ow, never said anything !
    Well obviously do what you want, but I am just telling you the facts that you shouldn't nor do you need to clean it. Do you clean inside a girls vagina? No. Same thing. Self cleaning organ. Just because a doctor is from a different country doesn't mean they are properly educated. I'm talking about practicing doctors in countries that do NOT practice routine infant cutting.

    I'm gonna continue to clean my sons foreskin so when he grows up he doesn't leave it gross (: !
  • Sorry but they are just wrong. Get literature from other countries where they actually have knowledge of intact care. You could possibly injure your child if you pull it back to clean it. It is not needed. This is the type of thing that make circumcision "necessary" as they get older. Nobody should be messing with it except your son. Only clean what is seen!!!

    None of my nephews were ever injured from having their peckers cleaned nor was my son, and my dr comes from somewhere across the seas, dr susanni, then my family dr is from another part of the world as well ! Dr Zemerli, and dr abenheimer is the only one who see him from Canada, the rest are from away and all say the say thing, don't pull it back till after 2 then gently pull it back to clean it ! My son never mentioned it hurt ever, never said ow, never said anything !
    Well obviously do what you want, but I am just telling you the facts that you shouldn't nor do you need to clean it. Do you clean inside a girls vagina? No. Same thing. Self cleaning organ. Just because a doctor is from a different country doesn't mean they are properly educated. I'm talking about practicing doctors in countries that do NOT practice routine infant cutting.

    I'm gonna continue to clean my sons foreskin so when he grows up he doesn't leave it gross (: !
    Lol ok. Because yea it would be super hard to leave it alone and just teach him proper hygiene... makes sense
  • Sorry but they are just wrong. Get literature from other countries where they actually have knowledge of intact care. You could possibly injure your child if you pull it back to clean it. It is not needed. This is the type of thing that make circumcision "necessary" as they get older. Nobody should be messing with it except your son. Only clean what is seen!!!

    None of my nephews were ever injured from having their peckers cleaned nor was my son, and my dr comes from somewhere across the seas, dr susanni, then my family dr is from another part of the world as well ! Dr Zemerli, and dr abenheimer is the only one who see him from Canada, the rest are from away and all say the say thing, don't pull it back till after 2 then gently pull it back to clean it ! My son never mentioned it hurt ever, never said ow, never said anything !
    Well obviously do what you want, but I am just telling you the facts that you shouldn't nor do you need to clean it. Do you clean inside a girls vagina? No. Same thing. Self cleaning organ. Just because a doctor is from a different country doesn't mean they are properly educated. I'm talking about practicing doctors in countries that do NOT practice routine infant cutting.

    I'm gonna continue to clean my sons foreskin so when he grows up he doesn't leave it gross (: !
    Lol ok. Because yea it would be super hard to leave it alone and just teach him proper hygiene... makes sense

    My oldest nephew is 11 and my sister has been cleaning his and he has no problems what so ever ! So I'm gonna continue to clean my sons penis and not leave it get gross ! I've dated people with foreskin, and even though they cleaned it with soap and water, after being in your pants all day it gets sweaty and icky ! Thank god my bf now is corcumsized ! So much cleaner !
  • This video is awesome!!!! @LydiaPick





  • ktrose82ktrose82 member
    edited April 2015
    Do what you feel is right for your baby.
  • Ok jeez everyone it's totally fine to accept the personal decision making here...a giant case study in whether or not circumcision is some horrible lifelong trauma has occurred in the last generation! I imagine, as most of our husband's impregnated us with their circumcised penises, that they're feeling ok with their junk. And clearly there are plenty of working uncircumcised penises as well. My husband says he enjoys sex plenty despite the lack of foreskin lol.

    Clearly things can go wrong either way too...but that's rare and basically true of every decision you will make in life.

    I think this is one of those things where the kid will be fine either way! No reason to be this upset! And no reason to think that either choice is one not made out of love!
  • You never retract the skin! When it naturally separates during puberty is when you need to retract it to wash but at that point it's up to your son.
  • klairv said:

    Re-reading back through this thread the very saddest thing on here is that nurses and people in the healthcare field, the very people we trust with our health, are the ones giving uninformed answers. They appear to know nothing about what the foreskin is and why it's important. Medical textbooks for years in the US have not even included the foreskin in descriptions and images of the penis. They don't even know what its for!

    The foreskin is much more than a flap of skin. It has lots of nerves in it designed for sexual pleasure. It's also designed to protect the glans (tip of the penis) and keep it moist, much like your eyelid protects your eye. Without this protective covering, the penis dries out and keratinizes (that means it gets a callous on it). If this does't sound healthy it's because it's not. Men who were circumcised at birth know nothing else so they think it's fine and normal. Often, even when confronted with the information, they unable to hear it, because it's a terrible thing to think you might have missed out on a lot of sexual pleasure -- that your penis has been permanently harmed.

    Also, in babies, the foreskin is fused to the tip of the penis like your fingernail to your nail. That means doctors need to first rip it apart and then slice off the foreskin. Often, the raw bleeding tip of the penis tries to re-fuse back to the foreskin causing adhesions or skin bridges. (Warning, do not Google those on a full stomach.) If you were told your baby slept through the procedure you were lied to. The best pain management available for a circumcision is called a dorsal nerve block and it only covers one of the two main nerves running down the penis. More often babies are given a simple sugar pacifier (I'm not even kidding) or lidocaine cream. The procedure is always painful.


    Uhmmm... My boyfriend is circumsized and his penis is not dried out and does not have callous on it LOL

  • klairv said:

    Re-reading back through this thread the very saddest thing on here is that nurses and people in the healthcare field, the very people we trust with our health, are the ones giving uninformed answers. They appear to know nothing about what the foreskin is and why it's important. Medical textbooks for years in the US have not even included the foreskin in descriptions and images of the penis. They don't even know what its for!

    The foreskin is much more than a flap of skin. It has lots of nerves in it designed for sexual pleasure. It's also designed to protect the glans (tip of the penis) and keep it moist, much like your eyelid protects your eye. Without this protective covering, the penis dries out and keratinizes (that means it gets a callous on it). If this does't sound healthy it's because it's not. Men who were circumcised at birth know nothing else so they think it's fine and normal. Often, even when confronted with the information, they unable to hear it, because it's a terrible thing to think you might have missed out on a lot of sexual pleasure -- that your penis has been permanently harmed.

    Also, in babies, the foreskin is fused to the tip of the penis like your fingernail to your nail. That means doctors need to first rip it apart and then slice off the foreskin. Often, the raw bleeding tip of the penis tries to re-fuse back to the foreskin causing adhesions or skin bridges. (Warning, do not Google those on a full stomach.) If you were told your baby slept through the procedure you were lied to. The best pain management available for a circumcision is called a dorsal nerve block and it only covers one of the two main nerves running down the penis. More often babies are given a simple sugar pacifier (I'm not even kidding) or lidocaine cream. The procedure is always painful.


    Uhmmm... My boyfriend is circumsized and his penis is not dried out and does not have callous on it LOL

    Actually, if you compare his glans with the glans of an uncircumcised man, you would be able to tell how rough it is. The glans of an uncircumcised man is soft and smooth, just like your clitoris is because it is protected by your foreskin.
  • klairv said:

    Re-reading back through this thread the very saddest thing on here is that nurses and people in the healthcare field, the very people we trust with our health, are the ones giving uninformed answers. They appear to know nothing about what the foreskin is and why it's important. Medical textbooks for years in the US have not even included the foreskin in descriptions and images of the penis. They don't even know what its for!

    The foreskin is much more than a flap of skin. It has lots of nerves in it designed for sexual pleasure. It's also designed to protect the glans (tip of the penis) and keep it moist, much like your eyelid protects your eye. Without this protective covering, the penis dries out and keratinizes (that means it gets a callous on it). If this does't sound healthy it's because it's not. Men who were circumcised at birth know nothing else so they think it's fine and normal. Often, even when confronted with the information, they unable to hear it, because it's a terrible thing to think you might have missed out on a lot of sexual pleasure -- that your penis has been permanently harmed.

    Also, in babies, the foreskin is fused to the tip of the penis like your fingernail to your nail. That means doctors need to first rip it apart and then slice off the foreskin. Often, the raw bleeding tip of the penis tries to re-fuse back to the foreskin causing adhesions or skin bridges. (Warning, do not Google those on a full stomach.) If you were told your baby slept through the procedure you were lied to. The best pain management available for a circumcision is called a dorsal nerve block and it only covers one of the two main nerves running down the penis. More often babies are given a simple sugar pacifier (I'm not even kidding) or lidocaine cream. The procedure is always painful.


    Uhmmm... My boyfriend is circumsized and his penis is not dried out and does not have callous on it LOL

    Actually, if you compare his glans with the glans of an uncircumcised man, you would be able to tell how rough it is. The glans of an uncircumcised man is soft and smooth, just like your clitoris is because it is protected by your foreskin.

    Haha I've been with men who had foreskin, and in my opinion circumsision looks much much better ! I love the look and feel of it !
    And his penis is very soft and smooth skinned ! Most perfect penis I've ever seen
  • Haha circumsion does leave a callous on your penis LOL and if I have another son I will corcumsize him (: !
  • I'd bet most off the people ranting about how it is genial mutilation also scream about "men making decisions for women's bodies" in the abortion debate. Since my H is the one in the family with a pen is, he gets to make all penis related decisions. Period.
  • I'd bet most off the people ranting about how it is genial mutilation also scream about "men making decisions for women's bodies" in the abortion debate. Since my H is the one in the family with a pen is, he gets to make all penis related decisions. Period.

    My bf is circumsized and he wants our son to be if we have a son ! He said he's never had any problems, neither did the rest of his family with being circumsized so I agreed (: !
  • @gabrielafrnqyepez I think by the abortion comment she meant, by either the guy forcing you to when you don't want to, or by you wanting to for circumstances and the male saying no... That's what I got out of it ! And I guess I'm gonna gender mutilate my son if we have one ! Because bf is getting him circumsized !
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