"Redshirting"/Holding Back before Kindergarten *Not IF Related* — The Bump
Secondary IF

"Redshirting"/Holding Back before Kindergarten *Not IF Related*

Morning, ladies!

I was wondering if any of you have older kids you've held back an extra year before starting kindergarten?

At conferences last week, we were told DD (who is currently in a 3-day pre-school program) will be ready to start full-day kindergarten next fall.  However, we're sort of second guessing that for a few reasons: 1.) DD is one of the youngest in the class (summer birthday) and 2.) we're not sure if she is ready for an all-day, every day program.

The other option is to enroll her in the young fives/developmental kindergarten program, which is a HALF day every day.

It sounds like a few of DD's friends are in the same limbo: the teacher says they are ready, but can they handle an all-day program?  We don't need to make a decision right away, but we've been thinking about it quite a bit since last week.  Ultimately, we'll see how the rest of the school year goes, and move on from there.

Any experiences?  Opinions?  FWIW, while DD is on the younger side, she's always been labeled as "mature" by her teachers (she also did 2-day pre-K last year).  Acidemically and socially, she is doing great.  I guess I'm just worried that she won't be able to keep up once she starts the rigors of kindergarten, which I've heard is "the new first grade".
- DD born July 2010 -
- TTC #2 since January 2013 -
- Clomid cycles February - May 2014, all BFN -
- HSG July 2014, all clear! -
- July '14: IUI #1, w/Femara & Ovidrel= BFN -
- August '14: cycle cancelled -
- October '14: IUI #2 w/Femara, Bravelle, & Ovidrel : BFP!-
-November '14:  Discovered MMC @ 6 wk. ultrasound-
-February '15: IUI #3 w/Femara, Bravelle, & Ovidrel: Success!-
-Due November 2015-
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Re: "Redshirting"/Holding Back before Kindergarten *Not IF Related*

  • My DD1 is a July birthday and had absolutely no issues what so ever starting K.  BUT I was teaching full time when she was little so she had been in full day day care since she was 9 months old.  Many of her female friends have October birthdays!  I don't have experience teaching small children but if her teachers say she is ready, you feel academically she is ready, then I think you should have her start K.  Maybe the 1/2 day program if you are worried about the whole day?



    imageimageimage
    image
    My FF Chart:
    http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/490dd7
    TTC #3 since June 2013
    BFP #1 7/21/2013--EDD 3/30/14--D&C 9/24/13
    BFP #2 1/28/14--MC 2/7/14

    IUI #1 5mg Femara + trigger = BFN
    IUI #2 5mg Femara + trigger = BFN
    IUI #3 5mg Femara + trigger = BFN
    IVF #1, Stimmed for 12 days, ER 8/22/14, 9 retrieved, 7M, 7F!!  Freeze all due to fluid in uterus.
    FET end of October 2014 cancelled due to fluid in uterus due to possible c-scar defect
    Surgery scheduled 12/12/14 to fix possible isthmocele
    3/26/15 transferred one 8 cell grade 4 embryo and one 6 cell grade 3 embryo = slow rising betas for 2+ weeks = ectopic MTX shot 4/29/15
    Repeat c-scar surgery June 2015
    2nd and last IVF cycle August 2015, stimmed for 12 days, 2 egg retrieved, both mature and both fertilized.  Transferred both 8-cell embryos on Day 3, beta 9/5/15 = BFFN
    MOVING TO ADOPTION!  


    BDevereaux
  • Hi! While I don't have older children I did teach elementary school for 10 years prior to having DD and my last 4 years of teaching was 1st grade. I'm happy to hear when parents stop and think about whether or not their kids are ready for Kinder. So first kudos to you because where we live in CT as long as a child is 5 by December 31st then can start K and most parents will start their 4 year olds who aren't ready and ultimately fall behind in the years to follow.

    Now without knowing your DD I can't really say which way you should go. BUT you know her best and if you truly feel like she's not ready for a full day program and the rigor of K (because yes, it's big time nowadays) then the 1/2 day 5's program sounds wonderful! To me it also depends in the state you live in because the rigor definitely varies based on that as well! HTH!!

    ME: 35 DH: 39

    Married July 2011

    DD Born 8/12

    TTC #2 since 11/13

    ME: Submucosal Fibroid Surgery Date APRIL 14th 2015 -Left Tube is blocked by Fibroid~Surgeon removed 26 Fibroids from my Ute and Unblocked my Tube

    DH:Azoospermia...Thank God we have 12 vials of frozen swimmers

    July 15-Check to see if Ute is all healed

    IUI #1 8/3/15...BFN

    IUI #2 9/5/15...BFP on 9/17/15

    Beta #1-344

    Beta #2-809

    Beta #3 8,390

    1st u/s 8/8/15 1 bean HB 135 @ 6w5d



    BDevereaux
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  • My DD2 is in the same boat- turns 5 Aug. 7th, and the cut off for kindergarten here is 5 by Sept. 1st. We are planning on sending her with her class. She does preschool 3 mornings/week, with one day being a full 9am-3pm day with the purpose of making sure she will be ok with all day/every day kindergarten next year. Her teacher also says she is ready academically and socially. Fwiw my DD1 is currently in kindergarten, but is an October birthday so turned 6 shortly after starting. Based on what I know of the kindergarten curriculum from her I'm very confident DD2 will be just fine. Here (I'm in MN) it is pretty reading-intense, but DD2 is interested in learning to read so I think that will help a ton.

    Two DDs 10/08 and 08/10, no primary IF
    TTC #3 since 10/2011 - dx unexplained/weak ovulation
     3 BFN clomid + TI cycles, 5 BFN clomid/gonal f IUIs, 1 mmc IUI
    2/19/2014 IVF #1 Unexpected low E2 (oversuppressed) -> increased to max doses = 3 or 4 follicles, converting to IUI
    BFFP Saw 1 beautiful heartbeat at 6w6d, follow up u/s at 9w showed mmc. Eff this.
    NTNP 5/2014-9/2014, OPKs and TI 10/2014 - 1/2015. 
    RPL testing all normal, AFC, AMH, and FSH all normal. 
    IVF 1.2 1/22/2014 natural cycle start, AFC 28, 300 gonal f/150menopur. 
    ER 2/3/15 14R 8M 3F w/ICSI Day 5 transfer on 2/8/15 of one "Grade A+" blast and have TWO frosties! 

     image

    NB817BDevereaux
  • We did this with DS. He is 5 and in his 3rd year of preschool. He can handle an all-day program and I'm actually salty that his district doesn't offer a full day preschool for kids with special needs. He has autism and the research indicates a certain amount of instruction is needed. He is not getting that amount through his preK program and I have to supplement. But that's a special ed discussion I don't have the energy for right now!

    Long story short, he was not ready for K this year. Academically, absolutely. But emotionally and socially, no way. He doesn't have a choice next year- off to Kindergarten he'll go.
    BDevereaux
  • Our dd is one of the youngest in her class she's a June birthday and our county's cut off is 5 by July 31st. We sent her with her class but she was very ready. The year before we sent her twice a week half days to preschool just to sorta help get her used to sitting and listening to a teacher. Had she not been ready I would have had no problem holding her back. Every child is different.

    Me(27)+ DH(30) Married since Sept.2007
    BFP #1 DD born 6/1/2009 (no complications)
    TTC #2 March 2011
    BFP# 2 after 4 rounds of clomid (blighted ovum)12/11
    BFP# 3 w help of clomid 2/12 DS born 10/24/2012

    TTC#3

     Stopped preventing when DS was 6 months old (4/13), really started TTC 10/13
    Started clomid July 2014, 3 failed rounds of clomid w OB (low pro on CD 21) sent to RE

    HSG and blood work all good
    round 1: clomid and trigger shot~BFN
    round 2: clomid, trigger and IUI~BFN
    round 3: clomid, trigger and IUI +4 booster HCG~NOPE

    On a break!!! Til April/May 

    round 4:clomid, trigger (missed IUI window) NO fricking way BFP


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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    Jen071407BDevereaux
  • L will be one of the youngest in her class so I have to figure this out as well. I understand that the emotional part will be the hardest part for most kids. If you don't think she is ready for it, go with the half day option.

    Kid #1 - 09/03/12
    Kid #2 - maybe???
    Diagnosed with Severe Ashermans 
    Hysteroscopy #10 - scar tissue grew back reblocking my right tube
    #11 or IVF with scarring still inside?
    1 lone embryo from September 2016 retreival, dx with Trisomy 16, starting fresh
    BDevereaux
  • I am an August baby and was on the younger end (9/1 cut off in MA) and never had any issues socially or academically so I'm confident that my end of July girl will do fine with K in the fall.  She's in preschool just 2.5 hours a day now, but I'm sure the transition will end up smooth even if there is a rough start. 

    My thought process is that unless there are significant concerns about social or academic progression that I'll just go with the date that is set by the state/school system - someone always has to be the youngest and oldest. 

    You should also check with your school system.  Although I'm sure it's not common, 60 Minutes had a report on Redshirting and there are cities that if you don't show up on time for K they'll just put you in 1st grade when your child enters the school system.  The rationale was that when people don't send their kids on time it can affect the school system planning how many kids will be in each school and each grade, and the majority of red shirting kids were getting sufficient academics their redshirted year to be ready to go into 1st grade.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    TTC #2 since April 2012

    Year 1 - nothing

    Year 2 - two m/c

    Year 3 - unexplained diagnosis & 4 failed IUIs with Clomid/Letrozole

    Year 4 - still unexplained & 3 failed IUIs with Follistim & Ovidral

    Year 5 - trying on our own

    BDevereaux
  • DS is a late Sept baby. He makes the cutoff for Kindergarten (Dec. 1) but at the preschool we are sending him to they want the kids to be 3 by Sept 1 to start. So he will be the older one in the class as we are going to follow the Sept 1 cutoff the preschool requests. So he will start pre-K 3 this Sept when he turns 4 at the end of the month. My mom is a teacher and she always tells me she thinks the cutoff should be Sept 1 everywhere. She thinks that boys especially do better being the older one in the class. 
    "From the moment I first saw you, the second that you were born, I knew that you were the love of my life" Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Me: 35, DH: 40
    TTC # 2 since 8/13, Dx: unexplained secondary infertility
    Clomid cycles 7/14 & 8/14= BFN
    IUI # 1 (clomid) 8/27/14= BFN
    IUI # 2 (clomid and follistim) 9/25/14= BFN
    IUI # 3 (femara and follistim) 10/23/14= BFN
    IUI # 4 (femara and follistim) 11/20/14= BFN
    12/12/14- saline sono shows two polyps
    2/15- two uterine polyps and "schmutz" (RE's words) removed
    8/15- surprise BFP! Beta #1 70 Beta #2 150 
    BDevereaux
  • I too was the youngest in my grade, with a birthday just two days before cut-off. I did not have any problems and did not do preschool, I had a SAHM. My DD is late June girl (cutoff sept 1) and no issues. Even though she did PreK 3 & 4 both full days, by the time she left K she was hardly able to read. In 1st grade she bounced from barely reading to 2 grade levels ahead. How they fare is probably not easily predicted, and it could start badly and then suddenly she just gets it and makes amazing progress! Could you start the full day and if it doesn't work well transfer to half-day?

    Two years, two losses and three IUIs...

    We are having TRIPLETS!

    EDD 1/26/16

     GGB born November 2015!


    CeCe8579BDevereaux
  • My daughter went start from home to all day kindergarten with no issues at all.
    Carly
    (Former UN: iloveshanej)

    Birdie born 05/01/2007
    Rainbow Surprise Baby due 05/26/2017                                          


    Potato Launcher


    BDevereaux
  • Thanks for the all feedback, you guys!  I really appreciate it.

    Right now, we are sort of leaning towards full-day kindergarten.  Of course the new schedule will be an adjustment, but I think it will definitely be manageable.  I have two nephews who both started kindergarten this past fall, one had JUST turned 5 and the other didn't turn 5 until after school started.  Both sets of parents were hesitant to start kindergarten (these boys are... rambunctious to say the least), but the boys adjusted and are doing great.

    Again, we will wait to see how the rest of the year goes and we still plan on talking with the kindergarten teachers to maybe get a feel for what they will expect.  I do trust my daughter's teacher, but just want to make sure we make the right decision.
    - DD born July 2010 -
    - TTC #2 since January 2013 -
    - Clomid cycles February - May 2014, all BFN -
    - HSG July 2014, all clear! -
    - July '14: IUI #1, w/Femara & Ovidrel= BFN -
    - August '14: cycle cancelled -
    - October '14: IUI #2 w/Femara, Bravelle, & Ovidrel : BFP!-
    -November '14:  Discovered MMC @ 6 wk. ultrasound-
    -February '15: IUI #3 w/Femara, Bravelle, & Ovidrel: Success!-
    -Due November 2015-
    image
    Jen071407
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