Ok....so my mother says it's hormones but.... I am 10+2 my family all know...my sister today announces she's 4 weeks.... am I a total bitch for being really angry about this. Feel like she's totally stolen our thunder xxx
If you were my sister, I would be so upset that you weren't able to share in my joy just because you got pregnant first. Like it's some badge of honor.
Oh my goodness, with all the loss posts we've had on this board lately, this just makes me ACHE.
Marian Abigail :: born 9-16-2012 via emergency C/S
On the off chance I'm wrong, my SIL and I were pregnant at the same time, we were 4w apart. It was seriously awesome! So much fun! And now our two 4 year olds are about as close as close can be and it's great having someone with a LO the same age. Plus, that was the first grandchild on my family's side and on my DH's side SIL and I were both carrying the first grandbabies, it was kind of nice to have some of the attention not always focused on just me and subsequently not just on our new baby when she was born. You will see the constant advice and attention is smothering!
Also, if I'm honest, I didn't check with anyone before having sex with DH. Didn't know I had to clear conception with my relatives. Fingers crossed it works out!
OMG I didn't either. Was I supposed to check and see if my sister or other relatives were planning a baby?
Yeah I agree with OP you are being very selfish. If I had a sister I would be happy we could do so many things together and it would have even more meaning than it already does because we are both going threw this awesome experience. Suck it up grow up and go get your sis some ginger ale she might need it.
My favorite adage is that feelings are honest - you're allowed to feel however you want, even if it isn't right or fair.
That being said, I'm going to go out on a limb here and say your sister didn't get knocked up on purpose to fuck with you, and your baby will have a cousin really close in age - that's pretty fun.
It's hard to remember what a blink of an eye pregnancy is, versus the rest of life. I'd say for your own mental health and relationship with your sister, this is not a hill worth dying on and it would be better to take a deep breath, scream into a pillow, cry at the unfairness of life and timing, and then get over it and hope like hell your sister doesn't have a chemical pregnancy or some other tragedy since she made the announcement so early. You can be in this together!
I would be ecstatic if I found out my sister was pregnant at the same time as I am. I would love for my child to have a cousin that is so close in age.
Cousins are usually a kid's first best friend. That they'll be so close in age is awesome! My nephew is already 11 years old, and there are no other kiddos. My bff's LO is almost 3. There will be no one in my immediate friends or family with a baby close to mine's age. I'm a bit bummed at that, actually.
I won't flame you, as that's been done, but do try to look on the bright side here. You won't get fewer hugs or gifts. You're gaining a huge gift by having another baby so close in age to yours.
Ok....so my mother says it's hormones but....
I am 10+2 my family all know...my sister today announces she's 4 weeks.... am I a total bitch for being really angry about this.
Feel like she's totally stolen our thunder
xxx
Um yeah, you are. Sorry. You can feel kind of disappointed and annoyed for a minute or two but you need to get over it quick. You cannot expect other people to plan their reproductive activities around yours- you are not that special. You have no idea how long she's been trying- it's not like she got pregnant on purpose to spite you.
When I told my sister I was pregnant she confessed that she and her husband were about to start TTC. I was THRILLED. We are twins and I think it would be so awesome to be pregnant and the same time and have babies around the same age. (Not going to lie, I'm a little competitive, so I'm happy I beat her to it! But it would've been fine either way.)
When I got pregnant with my first I was super excited. Then I found out my sister was pregnant and due 4 weeks after me. I was even more excited! Then my SIL got pregnant 9 weeks after me. Again I was so excited! That year we had cousins March, April and May and they are so close! Triplet cousins! It's wonderful!
They're your feelings, you own them. I do think it's unreasonable to say she's stealing your thunder. The hormones are crazy though and maybe you'll be able to chalk it up to that later and maybe, apologize if necessary? I also think it's cool that you're kids are going to be born close together. My kids are close in age with their cousins, I have cousins in the same age group as well as DH.
In all seriousness, I was pregnant at the same time as my SIL. DD and her cousin as best friends. You have two options here:
1) You can continue to be a brat.
2) You can embrace the fact that the two of you are going to be moms AND that your children will be super close in age, potential for a life-long friendship.
Marian Abigail :: born 9-16-2012 via emergency C/S
I would be so happy if I found out my sister was pregnant at the same time as me. Cousins close in age are awesome!
same here. I heard my brother and his wife were trying and I was so happy! Unfortunately they have had some trouble and I'm keeping my FX that it happens soon for them. I'd love to share this awesome time with them. Plus having close cousins always is way fun.
Are you shitting me? I got pregnant at the end of my sisters pregnancy and I love that my daughter has a cousin so close in age. I would kill to have a pregnancy buddy let alone a sister to gripe to about stuff, ask questions etc. Try and see the good in this and how blessed your family is.
I lost a baby early this year and everyday I come here I have to say a prayer for another mother who has lost her baby.....and on top of that with recent events it could be awhile before I'm able to go to the doctor and fins out what the fuck is even going on with my new baby.
Please sweetie just be thankful that there will be two beautiful new people in your family spread the love please because things can change for the worst in the blink of a eye.
I think you are being unreasonable. You and your sister and pregnant at the same time!! How many women get to share something like that?? Be happy, be grateful! I really hope you get over this selfishness as it's something you do not want to teach your child. Enjoy this special time together:)
I think if you have already announced that maybe look at it from her perspective. She heard your announcement, got a positive test, and said ya know what? I'm gonna take a chance and announce super early, NOT to steal my sister's thunder, but because I am so excited to be pregnant with someone I love so much. Hmmmm. Kind of makes you sound like a selfish sister huh? God forbid something happens with her pregnancy, are you ready to take that news knowing how you reacted to her happy news? Seriously grow up. You're about be a mother. Be glad you have someone so close to share this joy with.
This has already been covered but I would be over the moon to be pregnant the same time as one of my sisters. I hope you can re-evaluate your priorities and find some happiness for your sister.
Married 12/17/2011 K born 8/31/12 C born 1/11/14 BFP #3 Nov 2014: D&C January 2015 BFP #4 Sept 2016: Due May 31 2017
I'm sorry you're frustrated. Like another poster said, feelings are real. What about the situation makes you upset? Maybe talking through it will help give some perspective.
Married - April 2014 | Miscarriage - June 2014 BFP - Oct 2014 - was scheduled for IVF, but discovered we did it naturally instead! - first baby! EDD July 8
That's so mean to say. What if she got pregnant and then you were the one that got pregnant after ? I'm sure you would be very upset if she was to act the way you are. Would you be thinking, oh dang! I am stealing her thunder! Uhhhh I don't think so. Me and two of my sister in laws were all pregnant at the same time and three months between each other. Our children are together ALL the time! Its a blessing to have cousins the same age. I would really take a step back and reconsider your attitude towards this situations and prevent hurting your sisters feelings. [-X
I just wanted to add, that the only sort of 'negative' feeling I had to my SIL and I being pregnant at the same time was, I did worry a lot about one of us having a loss. I did used to think, "What if God forbid one of us lost the baby and I/she had to keep looking at the other one knowing that's where I/she would be." So that feeling I do understand, though I don't think that's what you are reacting to.
So I have a similar situation, but am on the flip side of the table. My cousin is due in January and her shower will be roughly the same week I was planning on announcing to the family that we are KU. (Week 12, It's Christmas. I'm home for the holidays. It just makes sense)
QUESTION: Am I a bitch for "stealing her thunder"? Of course I wouldn't announce at her shower.
*I'm sharing this partly to make a point to OP, but also, because I am wanting to be a li'l sensitive to my cousin.
Edit for typo.
Married - April 2014 | Miscarriage - June 2014 BFP - Oct 2014 - was scheduled for IVF, but discovered we did it naturally instead! - first baby! EDD July 8
So I have a similar situation, but am on the flip side of the table. My cousin is due in January and her shower will be roughly the same week I was planning on announcing to the family that we are KU. (Week 12, It's Christmas. I'm home for the holidays. It just makes sense)
QUESTION: Am I a bitch for "stealing her thunder"? Of course I wouldn't announce at her shower.
*I'm sharing this partly to make a point to OP, but also, because I am wanting to be a li'l sensitive to my cousin.
Hell no! Announce it! I would be thrilled to find out my cousin was expecting at the same time! I wouldn't even care if she announced at my baby shower, but I could see how some people would be bothered by it.
I wish my sister would have a baby, I want my kids to have cousins close in age. I grew up with cousins much older or much younger, it would have been great to be the same age.
One of my besties is due 3wks before me. We had been trying a few month longer than them but I always told her I had a feeling they would be first. I was at her house when she POAS and the first thing she said was how she couldn't wait for me to be KU so our babies could be close and have a friend (their siblings aren't planning on babies for a long time still). It's seriously the best being pregnant when a friend is, none of my friends were pregnant or had kids yet when I was pregnant with DS, it was lonely.
Realize how lucky your kids are and how much fun it will be. You can go shopping together for mat clothes, buy baby stuff, and she won't get sick I baby talk like non pregnant friends/family.
Ok....so my mother says it's hormones but.... I am 10+2 my family all know...my sister today announces she's 4 weeks.... am I a total bitch for being really angry about this. Feel like she's totally stolen our thunder xxx
Time for some brutal honesty, if you were my sister, Id tell you to grow the fuck up. You don't stake a claim in being the only person pregnant for an entire 9 months. I'd personally love for my sister to say she's pregnant right now so we'd have cousins close in age.
Stop being a brat, life is not all about you.
Married July 19, 2014.
Inherited one stepson, so excited to continue our family!
BFP#1: June 15, 2014. MC June 20, 2014.
BFP#2: July 11, 2014. MMC July 27, 2014. Naturally passed tissue August 5, 2014.
So I have a similar situation, but am on the flip side of the table. My cousin is due in January and her shower will be roughly the same week I was planning on announcing to the family that we are KU. (Week 12, It's Christmas. I'm home for the holidays. It just makes sense)
QUESTION: Am I a bitch for "stealing her thunder"? Of course I wouldn't announce at her shower.
*I'm sharing this partly to make a point to OP, but also, because I am wanting to be a li'l sensitive to my cousin.
Edit for typo.
I would announce, I mean it's not like you are announcing at her shower. I would be so excited if one of my cousins was pregnant and did that.
BFP#1- April 24th. M/c-April 30th. BFP#2-September 11th. EDD: May 25th.
It's a girl!!! (:
Madison arrived on May 19th at 6:35 am (:
I know she will be happy, not only for me, but because we'll have little cousins (2nd cousins?) running around the same age. I will probably even give her a head's up sooner than I tell the others, so it's "our little secret" first.
Married - April 2014 | Miscarriage - June 2014 BFP - Oct 2014 - was scheduled for IVF, but discovered we did it naturally instead! - first baby! EDD July 8
Re: I AM FUMING....RANT ALERT
But it makes me really love my SIL...cuz she is also expecting and we just started telling people, I'm glad she isn't upset!
On the off chance I'm wrong, my SIL and I were pregnant at the same time, we were 4w apart. It was seriously awesome! So much fun! And now our two 4 year olds are about as close as close can be and it's great having someone with a LO the same age. Plus, that was the first grandchild on my family's side and on my DH's side SIL and I were both carrying the first grandbabies, it was kind of nice to have some of the attention not always focused on just me and subsequently not just on our new baby when she was born. You will see the constant advice and attention is smothering!
When I told my sister I was pregnant she confessed that she and her husband were about to start TTC. I was THRILLED. We are twins and I think it would be so awesome to be pregnant and the same time and have babies around the same age. (Not going to lie, I'm a little competitive, so I'm happy I beat her to it! But it would've been fine either way.)
I do think it's unreasonable to say she's stealing your thunder. The hormones are crazy though and maybe you'll be able to chalk it up to that later and maybe, apologize if necessary?
I also think it's cool that you're kids are going to be born close together. My kids are close in age with their cousins, I have cousins in the same age group as well as DH.
I lost a baby early this year and everyday I come here I have to say a prayer for another mother who has lost her baby.....and on top of that with recent events it could be awhile before I'm able to go to the doctor and fins out what the fuck is even going on with my new baby.
Please sweetie just be thankful that there will be two beautiful new people in your family spread the love please because things can change for the worst in the blink of a eye.
K born 8/31/12
C born 1/11/14
BFP #3 Nov 2014: D&C January 2015
BFP #4 Sept 2016: Due May 31 2017
Married - April 2014 | Miscarriage - June 2014
BFP - Oct 2014 - was scheduled for IVF, but discovered we did it naturally instead! - first baby! EDD July 8
I don't see the issue OP. Doesn't your family already know?! Grow up.
So I have a similar situation, but am on the flip side of the table. My cousin is due in January and her shower will be roughly the same week I was planning on announcing to the family that we are KU. (Week 12, It's Christmas. I'm home for the holidays. It just makes sense)
QUESTION: Am I a bitch for "stealing her thunder"? Of course I wouldn't announce at her shower.
*I'm sharing this partly to make a point to OP, but also, because I am wanting to be a li'l sensitive to my cousin.
Edit for typo.
Married - April 2014 | Miscarriage - June 2014
BFP - Oct 2014 - was scheduled for IVF, but discovered we did it naturally instead! - first baby! EDD July 8
my sister and I are 8 weeks apart and we're both thrilled that our kids will be so close in age.
DH - 27
TTC #1 since July 2014
One of my besties is due 3wks before me. We had been trying a few month longer than them but I always told her I had a feeling they would be first. I was at her house when she POAS and the first thing she said was how she couldn't wait for me to be KU so our babies could be close and have a friend (their siblings aren't planning on babies for a long time still). It's seriously the best being pregnant when a friend is, none of my friends were pregnant or had kids yet when I was pregnant with DS, it was lonely.
Realize how lucky your kids are and how much fun it will be. You can go shopping together for mat clothes, buy baby stuff, and she won't get sick I baby talk like non pregnant friends/family.
Hahahaha.
I'd personally love for my sister to say she's pregnant right now so we'd have cousins close in age.
Stop being a brat, life is not all about you.
I know she will be happy, not only for me, but because we'll have little cousins (2nd cousins?) running around the same age. I will probably even give her a head's up sooner than I tell the others, so it's "our little secret" first.
Married - April 2014 | Miscarriage - June 2014
BFP - Oct 2014 - was scheduled for IVF, but discovered we did it naturally instead! - first baby! EDD July 8