STM: do you plan on having your LO(s) there for the birth

chelseeea · November 2014

Just wondering what everyone else is doing with their other children while labouring/birthing? I think my MIL or my dad will take my DD when I go in labour, as my last labour was really quick and probably a bit too intense for a 2 year old to really grasp. Once the baby is born, we'll have her come to the hospital to see him.

shlittertoots · November 2014

We plan on dropping DD off at my parents, or if the baby is coming really fast my parents will meet us at the hospital and take her. I want DD to be one of the first to meet this little boy so she'll come back soon after I give birth (unless it's the MOTN of course).

chaysefaith · November 2014

No. My kids are older, they would never forget seeing my vagina open to 10cm and a baby coming out of it. Hell no. Not scarring them with that.

071115 · November 2014

My gramma will be here to watch my kids when I go into labour, then they will come to the hospital after to see the baby

ngolimento · November 2014

I personally would never let my kids see me giving birth. Either they would be too young to understand why mommy is cursing and unable to hold them, or too old to ever erase the memory of their mom's vagina.

Either way. Newp.

lisap0924 · November 2014

No way. My SS will not be there. He is 8 and doesn't want to see his step moms vagina.
plus I'm pretty sure I will need all of my H's attention during labor.

ruemorgan · November 2014

EmpireRecords24 said:
I stubbed my toe the other day and said "owieowieowie, ay yi, mommy hurt her toe!" And my almost two year old started crying. She also cried if she thinks another child is sad. Waaay too empathetic. So nope.

Omg this is the cutest thing ever :')

genmccarley · November 2014

Were planning a hospital birth so I don't think that a 2 year old present is an option.

That being said, I'm kind of freaking out worrying who he will stay with during this time since we don't live close to family. We asked my husbands grandma who has come to stay with us before & she said no, with no explanation...
We have a couple of friends he can shuffle between but it's just not the ideal situation.
After baby is born I don't imagine DH being able to spend much time with us at the hospital since we likely won't have anyone willing to take DS that long.

mamajack86 · November 2014

My mom lives down the street from the hospital I'm planning on delivering at. So my son will get dropped off with her on our way to the hospital. He will only be 20months, way too young in my opinion to be there when his sister is born. My mom said depending on the time of day I deliver and the circumstances etc. she will bring my son once we're ready to introduce him to his little sister. I'm concerned that he won't want to leave us once he's seen us, which will make me feel terrible, so I might just wait till we can all be home together.

Engineer81 · November 2014

Fuck no.

Skrittens · November 2014

I am a FTM so can't say - but - my sister and I were in the room when my brother was born. I was 7 and she was 4.

Even though it was 30 years ago, we still have great memories of the experience. Yes, there was a little blood, but I have no memories of vaginas or anything gory. My mom did it completely med free too. I don't remember her cursing at my dad, although she told me later he was really annoying.

The three big memories I have are my sister looking up my mom's gown to see if she could see the baby, when I cut his umbilical cord, and when he pooped on my mom after he came out.

My sisters kids are 12 and 9 and if they lived close and wanted to be at the birth I would certainly let them.

rm2013 · November 2014

No. My DD will be 23 months anyway so it makes no sense. But I am also NOT letting her come to the hospital after the baby is born. She can meet her new sibling in the comfort of our home. I think it would be far more traumatic for her to come to this strange place, see me looking like hell, see a strange new baby, and then have to leave without me (I'm sure screaming the whole way out). Not gonna do it.

jpavenski · November 2014

My almost 4 year old will prob stay with my family but I think they are debating who exactly because most of them wanna be in the hospital waiting room. Last time we were at the hospital less than three hours, so he mAy do fine there with them but not sure. I want him to come to the hospital to meet his brother at some point. Do you guys think 4 is old enough to understand why mommy has to stay in the hospital one more day?

JCWhitey · November 2014

The plan is to definitely not have DS there! He'll only be about 22 months so way too young to understand anything, and he freaks out whenever he goes to my OB appointments and they start to examine me. I can't imagine the breakdown he'd have seeing me in labor and all of the people around for that.

djoliet · November 2014

My son's grandma on his dad's side has agreed to take him when I go into labor. She will be the one taking him to school and such when I'm in the hospital. My parents live about 30 minutes away so having them take him wouldn't be real convenient. He's about to be 5, I have no idea how long my labor will be and sitting in a hospital would make him go crazy. I want him brought to the hospital as soon as she is born so he can meet his baby sister.

LadySnowblood · November 2014

No way. DS will be almost 3 and he has no idea what's going on anyways. My mom is going to watch him while we are in the hospital.

jap618 · November 2014

This is my first so I don't have any personal experience but my gut reaction was WTF? No, why would this be a good idea?

That being said my co-worker did home births for all 3 of her kids. The two oldest were obviously around when she had her 3rd and were yelling at her to "keep it down" because they couldn't hear the tv while she was in labor. Ha. No.

kellbell1982 · November 2014

No way, my daughter is nine and has ASD so I know she'd be too hard to handle. She understands I'm having a baby girl and she asks me a lot if it's going to hurt me and I'm honest and tell her a little. I know she'd get upset seeing me in pain plus she's hyperactive and gets into everything so it'd be impossible to handle her and honestly just picturing that is probably the most stressful scenario I could even conjure up in my imagination, I'm shuddering just thinking of it lol

corysgirls · November 2014

My kids have been at all of the births of their siblings. It's been great for us and no one has been traumatized so far. Our 11,8&5 year old girls are begging to be there again. Not so sure about our son- he will be 3.5 and could possibly get a little rowdy as most kids his age do. My girls don't get the money shot/vagina view so no weirdness there. They have always just hung out with family and friends, watched movies, played games or napped on the pull out couch. Our hospital has never put a limit on how many people or who can/can't be there either, it's always been a family affair like we wanted. So far I haven't had much drama in the delivery room either, other than a scare with our first baby so it's always been pretty calm and quiet. I know it doesn't work for everyone but to each their own.

graciesmurf · November 2014

I would love for DD (2) to be there, but we're planning a hospital birth and it is not an option.

Angelaketa · November 2014

My 5 year old son says he wants to be there but he obviously doesn't know what he is talking about. While I would love to have him witness the moment his two little brothers are born I don't think it's gonna happen. I might have to have my vaginal delivery in the OR and furthermore I would be so sad if he freaked out. I might have to let him see an old school video of a woman having a baby first to see if he would flip out or not.

JeepersWife · November 2014

Nope...not happening. DS is 3 and a mama's boy. He would freak! He will be with a family member (day of week will determine which member) and can come up to see his sister after all settles. He is a handful these days, full if energy, so it'd be best for him to be away from the hospital during delivery.

ST3WD · December 2014

jennypm said:

chaysefaith said:

No. My kids are older, they would never forget seeing my vagina open to 10cm and a baby coming out of it. Hell no. Not scarring them with that.

~~~~stuck in a damn box~~~~

This is what I was thinking. Not sure my 12 and 10 year olds need to see that, but at the same time, it might serve as great birth control for their teen years.

Seriously, though, no, no, no. They will be staying with my mom or, if it's their dad's parenting time, they'll go with him.

ETA: words are hard

The bolded bit: Nopenopenope.

This was my parent's mentality about us seeing live births, human or otherwise (livestock, pets,videos, etc.), and it is not effective. Well, at least for me and the people who had similar experiences in my school that I spoke to about it. It fed my personal curiosity on anatomy and pregnancy in general. The other girls agreed when it came up in both health and Child Development.

Maybe it'll scar your kids into not reproducing ever, but it'll probably help them see they're designed to do this and may even encourage them to follow in your footsteps.

Andplusalso, it changed my relationship with my aunt forever. I don't care, but she can't look my sister or me in the eye.

TL;DR - I don't have kids, but from experience, HELL NO. Get a medical video for your kids instead. Extra points if you can find a forceps delivery.

gnomemom · December 2014

Engineer81 said:

Fuck no.

Yeah, this was my first reaction.

DS just turned two and I just can't imagine how him being there could be a good idea at all. He was terrified during my ultrasound at 7 weeks and DH had to take him out of the room. He can come visit after everyone is cleaned up and well-rested.

KD32412 · December 2014

Nope. However, I was considering getting someone to video my second birth, then I can have my daughters watch it when they are teenagers and scar them mentally and hopefully educate them on the realities of childbirth. Hahaha!