Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
lynnz52
member
Re: Accidently consumed raw honey
"it is unlikely to cross the placenta via passive diffusion. A case report in which a woman acquired botulism during pregnancy suggested that there is no increased risk to the fetus. Together with the low risk of colonization botulism among healthy adults, women without gastrointestinal pathology do not need to avoid honey during pregnancy."
I snipped out the first sentence because I doubt you care about the molecular weight of botulism.
Eta: since you don't have botulism, it doesn't need to be a concern for you. This just days baby most likely will not get it if you do.
ETA: (unless the label says somethign different about pasteurization). Also, I'm doubtful that there's even that much honey in one bottle of soda, so the amount of potential bacteria would be TINY. Either way, I'm still thinking you're fine and you can keep consuming the root beer.
Married August 2009
BFP#1 12/19/13 * EDD 8/24/14 * MMC Discovered 2/04/14
BFP#2 5/27/14 * EDD 2/8/15 * Please be our rainbow
@jennjilljoite said it way better than I could but I'm pretty sure the only real danger of unpasteurized cheeses and honey (and raw sushi and rare beef) is that when you are pregnant you are more susceptible to foodborne illness. So if you haven't gotten sick, you're fine. If it makes you feel better to steer clear from now on, great. But I don't think there's any damage done.
BFP 6/15/14 EDD: 2/24/15
Thank you, this does offer a lot of reassurance. I couldn't find anything online that says Sprecher honey is pasteurized. I like many other kinds of root beer, so I'll probably just switch. Probably not great to drink too much anyway, so much sugar.
Married August 2009
BFP#1 12/19/13 * EDD 8/24/14 * MMC Discovered 2/04/14
BFP#2 5/27/14 * EDD 2/8/15 * Please be our rainbow
Or goat cheese??? ::::Drool::::
This is from the Mayo Clinic, the number one hospital in Minnesota, and one of the most advanced in the nation.
https://www.mayoclinic.org/drugs-supplements/honey/safety/hrb-20059618
"Pregnancy and Breastfeeding
There is a lack of scientific evidence on the use of honey during pregnancy or breastfeeding. Honey may contain contaminants that may be harmful to pregnant or breastfeeding women, or to unborn babies."
I don't believe that this means if you eat it, you are automatically doing harm. It's just one of those safe than sorry things.
Thank you for the laugh about the honey on raw fish, deli meat, and feta...... while sitting in a hot bath and getting your nails done.
Married August 2009
BFP#1 12/19/13 * EDD 8/24/14 * MMC Discovered 2/04/14
BFP#2 5/27/14 * EDD 2/8/15 * Please be our rainbow
Married August 2009
BFP#1 12/19/13 * EDD 8/24/14 * MMC Discovered 2/04/14
BFP#2 5/27/14 * EDD 2/8/15 * Please be our rainbow
BFP 6/15/14 EDD: 2/24/15
Yeah and I guess you shouldn't jump on trampolines either.
It was a joke, holy crap. Superior really? I took a bath tonight! But yea.. I've been told no baths over 98 degrees, along with no hot tubs. And certain finger nail polishes have some chemical that's not good. And you can't dye your hair. And you can't go down waterslides, or go in haunted houses.
Another forum I was reading ripped a woman a new one for even asking about N/A beer. I was joking around with my husband about how I read in a blog that you shouldn't drink root beer because it has the word "beer" in it, and you don't want to take any chances!
The reason I asked about the honey, is it is difficult to tell what is really harmful and what is just overkill. I mean they tell us in the U.S. no sushi, but I've read it is apart of Japanese culture, and pregnant women commonly eat it there.
But I also take baths, eat lunch meat, helped move cows, done the zip line (we have a huge one installed at my ILs, y'all be jealous we're kinda like duck dynasty), had my fair share of caffeine, eaten feta cheese, painted the nursery, stained furniture...
You name it. I still don't think I'm a bad mom. I just think I'm reasonable about what I avoid. Like meth, crack, smoking, etc. Ps. I'm going to vaccinate my child.
Married 9/10/11 * BFP 6/9/14 * EDD 1/25/15
Honestly, I mean I just want to try to do the best I can for my baby. It's my first, so whatever I can do I will do. If that means not eating honey or lunch meat, fine whatever I can do that. I think that doctors have to error on the side of caution.
But it seems silly for me to get upset about something that cleary many women do and it has no effects. So I just wanted to hear from everyone that I would be fine, which I have now.
I imagine that one of the biggest risks a mother and her baby take is getting in the car and driving to work everyday, but it's not like you can go ahead and not do that for the rest of your life.
https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2013/08/thinking-about-pregnancy-like-an-economist/278874/
Married August 2009
BFP#1 12/19/13 * EDD 8/24/14 * MMC Discovered 2/04/14
BFP#2 5/27/14 * EDD 2/8/15 * Please be our rainbow
This is from the Mayo Clinic, the number one hospital in Minnesota, and one of the most advanced in the nation.
https://www.mayoclinic.org/drugs-supplements/honey/safety/hrb-20059618
"Pregnancy and Breastfeeding
There is a lack of scientific evidence on the use of honey during pregnancy or breastfeeding. Honey may contain contaminants that may be harmful to pregnant or breastfeeding women, or to unborn babies."
I don't believe that this means if you eat it, you are automatically doing harm. It's just one of those safe than sorry things.
Thank you for the laugh about the honey on raw fish, deli meat, and feta...... while sitting in a hot bath and getting your nails done.
I prefer to trust research performed by the National Institutes of Health:https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2860824/
The only thing my Midwife made me promise not to do was to go on forums or believe anything I read on the internet.
It's just nice for the discussions and support sometimes.
I had a SCH early in pregnancy and it scared the crap out of me because I had no idea what was going on, I thought it was a miscarriage. The doctors didn't give me a lot of information, so I'm grateful for the forums. Although, you do have to use your best judgement.