September 2012 Moms

FFFC

I want to be part of something. I weigh the same right now as when I gave birth. I'm a lazy POS right now.
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Re: FFFC

  • I stopped at Chick-Fil-A after body pump the other night ordered a sandwich and a milkshake. I ate it all in the car and threw it out before DH saw. I walked in the door and he was eating cereal because he both skipped dinner. I felt so shitty that I didn't bring him something home.

    Kid #1 - 09/03/12
    Kid #2 - maybe???
    Diagnosed with Severe Ashermans 
    Hysteroscopy #10 - scar tissue grew back reblocking my right tube
    #11 or IVF with scarring still inside?
    1 lone embryo from September 2016 retreival, dx with Trisomy 16, starting fresh
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  • There was only one banana left in the house this morning and I guilted L into letting me take it. She got blueberries, raspberries, and dried bananas in return, but I still won! haha

    Kid #1 - 09/03/12
    Kid #2 - maybe???
    Diagnosed with Severe Ashermans 
    Hysteroscopy #10 - scar tissue grew back reblocking my right tube
    #11 or IVF with scarring still inside?
    1 lone embryo from September 2016 retreival, dx with Trisomy 16, starting fresh
  • Okay, food confessions suck. I need to come up with something better. 

    Kid #1 - 09/03/12
    Kid #2 - maybe???
    Diagnosed with Severe Ashermans 
    Hysteroscopy #10 - scar tissue grew back reblocking my right tube
    #11 or IVF with scarring still inside?
    1 lone embryo from September 2016 retreival, dx with Trisomy 16, starting fresh
  • We've been eating breakfast in front of the TV this week and have been watching way too much TV in general (him and me!). These molars are going to kill both of us.
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  • Okay, food confessions suck. I need to come up with something better. 
    My confessions often involve food, lol.

    I haven't eaten a proper breakfast all week, but I am increasing my caffeine consumption every day bc it balances out the crummy sleep I've been getting.

    I haven't cooked dinner all week, and I don't plan to start this weekend bc Sunday is my birthday.

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  • I signed up for another half marathon and now have little desire to actually do my long training run after taking last weekend off.

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  • I'm waiting for my best girlfriend to have her baby (her third). She went into the hospital last night. As soon as this kid is born, I'm leaving work to go visit.

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  • miss50 said:
    I want to be part of something. I weigh the same right now as when I gave birth. I'm a lazy POS right now.
    I am super lazy lately and it's now starting to bug me.  And I know only I control it, but I still can't get out and do something.

    DH is running a 10K tomorrow morning and for the first time in the 16 years we've known each other he is running more often and further than me.  I'm crazy proud of him, but jealous that he's so active and I sit on my butt eating brownies at night instead of running.  Again - no one's fault but my own.

    I need a swift kick in the butt.

    Big Kid Jan 2010

    Littlest Man Sept 2012

  • melody921 said:
    Okay, food confessions suck. I need to come up with something better. 
    My confessions often involve food, lol.

    I haven't eaten a proper breakfast all week, but I am increasing my caffeine consumption every day bc it balances out the crummy sleep I've been getting.

    I haven't cooked dinner all week, and I don't plan to start this weekend bc Sunday is my birthday.
    Oh. Hai. Are we the same person this week? I have brought oatmeal to work (I made a big batch of crockpot, apple oats) but haven't eaten it until after 10am every day. That is the only thing I eat all day until I get home. Then I am too tired to cook, L has already eaten, so I have cereal, a sandwich, or leftovers. #Winning. 

    Kid #1 - 09/03/12
    Kid #2 - maybe???
    Diagnosed with Severe Ashermans 
    Hysteroscopy #10 - scar tissue grew back reblocking my right tube
    #11 or IVF with scarring still inside?
    1 lone embryo from September 2016 retreival, dx with Trisomy 16, starting fresh
  • melody921 said:
    I signed up for another half marathon and now have little desire to actually do my long training run after taking last weekend off.
    This always happened to me between races. You will enjoy it once you are out there. 

    Kid #1 - 09/03/12
    Kid #2 - maybe???
    Diagnosed with Severe Ashermans 
    Hysteroscopy #10 - scar tissue grew back reblocking my right tube
    #11 or IVF with scarring still inside?
    1 lone embryo from September 2016 retreival, dx with Trisomy 16, starting fresh
  • #Bragplaint

    I have made my self irreplacable at work, but now I am getting more and more work because of it. I need to finish some of the SOPs I started so I don't feel so guilty going on STD. 

    They hired a new girl for me to train, so hopefully, my status will go away and I can go on leave without feeling like I am leaving them in a lurch.

    Kid #1 - 09/03/12
    Kid #2 - maybe???
    Diagnosed with Severe Ashermans 
    Hysteroscopy #10 - scar tissue grew back reblocking my right tube
    #11 or IVF with scarring still inside?
    1 lone embryo from September 2016 retreival, dx with Trisomy 16, starting fresh
  • I just found out this morning that there are adjusters in a lot of kids pants to tighten the waist. I had no idea! I took Ethan into school in his 2t pants, which he's swimming in and his teacher showed me how to adjust the waist. Now we just have length issues. I am so happy to know that though.
    These are the only kinds of pants i buy for my son :)  they are awesome!  however they pulled so tight to keep them up that it looks funny - oh well!
    my read shelf:
    Sara (smb+jab)'s book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)  

    BFP 8/23/11 natural m/c 9/7/11 @ 6w BFP 1/16/2012 C-section 9/16/2012 Health baby boy!
  • I was sad that the maryjane TOMS didn't fit L, but I bought her a normal pair during the Zulily sale. I wasn't sure if they would fit, but went ahead and bought her 3 pair because I wanted to get her some to match mine. 

    I was irrationally sad when she got to daycare drop off and was more excited that her TOMS matched the DCP's adult daughter than mine. 

    Kid #1 - 09/03/12
    Kid #2 - maybe???
    Diagnosed with Severe Ashermans 
    Hysteroscopy #10 - scar tissue grew back reblocking my right tube
    #11 or IVF with scarring still inside?
    1 lone embryo from September 2016 retreival, dx with Trisomy 16, starting fresh
  • I think I am going to need a break soon. I hate that because I chose to stay at home, people think I'm not allowed to complain. Ever. I can't tell you the last time I was away from Quinn for more than 3 hours. My husband has been alone with her 3 times in the last 18 months. I've allowed him to slack off and I need to talk with him. I'm ALWAYS the primary caregiver, even when he's home. I need to force him to spend more time with her. Blah.
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  • kelbel527kelbel527 member
    edited September 2014
    I just found out this morning that there are adjusters in a lot of kids pants to tighten the waist. I had no idea! I took Ethan into school in his 2t pants, which he's swimming in and his teacher showed me how to adjust the waist. Now we just have length issues. I am so happy to know that though.
    We would have never survived without adjustable jeans.  Brody's waist is waay too small for his legs.  A couple years ago I would have been shocked to find that any parent didn't use these miraculous pants... then I had Aedan.

    All his pants have them (from Brody) but we never use them.  He has plenty of cute adorable baby chub to hold up his pants.  :)

    ETA: fix typo

    Big Kid Jan 2010

    Littlest Man Sept 2012

  • I just found out this morning that there are adjusters in a lot of kids pants to tighten the waist. I had no idea! I took Ethan into school in his 2t pants, which he's swimming in and his teacher showed me how to adjust the waist. Now we just have length issues. I am so happy to know that though.
    I will only buy adjustable pants. That was the only kind DS could wear for two years.

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  • I am feeling punchy today:

    I want to face punch my father. He skipped my son's birthday party and coming to my house to spend the weekend because he was too drunk to come.  then after my mom and brother leave (its a five hour car ride) he calls and tells me he's not coming because he cannot stand to be around my mother.  father of the year.  ugg we all know he is depressed over retirement (he retired 2 years ago), we have tried to get him help numerous times but he refuses to take it / resorts back to his old ways. Short of actually locking him we are out of ideas.  I guess now its up to him as to whether or not he wants to participate in live or sleep it away.  its very sad and frustrating to watch....


    On another note my in laws also deserves to be slapped as well.  Only MIL shows up to the party late, with nothing nice to say about any of the hard work i put into the party.  And then makes a big deal about having to leave to cook dinner for FIL and her mother, both of whom could have come to the party that i was serving dinner at!  Also no gift was given to DS, just a card with money for his college fund.  Which is very nice.  However in giving said gift you do not need to point out that you are a far better grandparent b/c you giving a gift that goes to his college fund while my mother gave him clothes and a tricycle.  Umm he does need clothes to wear now, so that is actually quite a thoughtful gift - but thanks again for insulting my mother.  It wouldn't be visit without you insulting my family at least once!

    End of family drama
    my read shelf:
    Sara (smb+jab)'s book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)  

    BFP 8/23/11 natural m/c 9/7/11 @ 6w BFP 1/16/2012 C-section 9/16/2012 Health baby boy!
  • AlinnJo said:
    I think I am going to need a break soon. I hate that because I chose to stay at home, people think I'm not allowed to complain. Ever. I can't tell you the last time I was away from Quinn for more than 3 hours. My husband has been alone with her 3 times in the last 18 months. I've allowed him to slack off and I need to talk with him. I'm ALWAYS the primary caregiver, even when he's home. I need to force him to spend more time with her. Blah.
    This is a tough conversation to have. I recently had one with DH because he wasn't pulling his weight when he was home and L was showing clear favoratism toward me because of it. She rarely went to him for anything when he was home. 

    Since our talk, he has made noticable changes to step it up. L even noticed the changes because she will go to him for more. 

    Everyone needs a break, whether they stay home or not. I hope you find some time soon.
    I actually think people who stay home need a break more. You are on all the time. I hope you can talk to DH and work out something that makes you feel less overworked @alinnjo

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  • Maya mostly wears leggings, so I never really had to deal with the pants issues it was a life changing moment this morning.

    @alinnjo I hope you can get a break. Everyone needs one sometimes. Let him know how you feel and come up with a plan for what you want to do and when. I know that it helps my H if I don't just say "I need a break" or "I want help" but if I let him know specifically what I want and when. "On Sunday morning, I need a break. I'm going out from 9-2 for errands and you will need to watch Quinn."
  • AlinnJo said:

    I think I am going to need a break soon. I hate that because I chose to stay at home, people think I'm not allowed to complain. Ever. I can't tell you the last time I was away from Quinn for more than 3 hours. My husband has been alone with her 3 times in the last 18 months. I've allowed him to slack off and I need to talk with him. I'm ALWAYS the primary caregiver, even when he's home. I need to force him to spend more time with her. Blah.

    Here's how I approached a similar issue this morning.
    "If I wake up to a sink full of dirty bottles and sippy cups again, you best just pack an overnight bag."

    I go back to work on Monday and H has gotten sofuckinglazy when it comes to the kids, and housework. He's been alone with both kids twice, both for no more than an hour or two, and each time I've come home to a nightmare.
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  • AlinnJo said:
    You all are so supportive. The kind words really mean a lot to me. Thank you. @Flamingemu‌ Quinn ONLY wants me now. When she's hurt, when she wakes up, to put her in her car seat, etc. I know it hurts my H's feelings but come on! I've mentioned it a little and he's starting to do more, but we definitely need a chat. He tends to get defensive if I don't go about it the right way. I know he works all day but he is also a dad too. We just need to find a better balance. And I need to take a step back and let him take charge.
    I'll be really honest here. I totally manipulated the situation because DH gets defensive too. And he wasn't doing as much with L because she only wanted me. #vicsouscycle

    We are arguing over something else and he said, what else do you need to get out? So I started crying and said nothing. It turned into a really good convo, but I was bottling it all in for so long that I started crying. He can't handle tears. I use them sparingly, but when they come out, he knows I am really upset. 

    Good luck.

    Kid #1 - 09/03/12
    Kid #2 - maybe???
    Diagnosed with Severe Ashermans 
    Hysteroscopy #10 - scar tissue grew back reblocking my right tube
    #11 or IVF with scarring still inside?
    1 lone embryo from September 2016 retreival, dx with Trisomy 16, starting fresh
  • AlinnJo said:
    I think I am going to need a break soon. I hate that because I chose to stay at home, people think I'm not allowed to complain. Ever. I can't tell you the last time I was away from Quinn for more than 3 hours. My husband has been alone with her 3 times in the last 18 months. I've allowed him to slack off and I need to talk with him. I'm ALWAYS the primary caregiver, even when he's home. I need to force him to spend more time with her. Blah.
    What everyone else said, but also, it would be awesome to find some SAHM friends so you have someone who will let you complain, and commiserate with you.  It IS hard and it's hard to figure out why sometimes.  I love my MOPS group so much, because they validate how I feel, just by having similar struggles.
  • OK - I have a confession sparked by the sparkle shoe post.  It's tl;dr :)

    I'm worried that we may not have any more kids and some day will regret that decision and potentially resent DH since he's the one who feels we're done.  

    I have moments where I am certain I can't handle anymore kids.  Then I have moments where I really think a 3rd (or even 4th lol) would be a great addition to our family.  My head tells me that having a 3rd child would really stretch our budget and probably our patience for awhile, but my heart tells me that we have so much more love to give.  And I know DH is not on board with more.  I don't know how he can be so certain.  

    And I know that it's not something that I need to decide immediately, but my original plan was to adopt our future child or children from China.  The wait list is so long right now, that even if we decided today to move forward, there would likely be a 7 year gap between our kids, which I don't know if that's something I could do anymore.

    Big Kid Jan 2010

    Littlest Man Sept 2012

  • kelbel527 said:
    OK - I have a confession sparked by the sparkle shoe post.  It's tl;dr :)

    I'm worried that we may not have any more kids and some day will regret that decision and potentially resent DH since he's the one who feels we're done.  

    I have moments where I am certain I can't handle anymore kids.  Then I have moments where I really think a 3rd (or even 4th lol) would be a great addition to our family.  My head tells me that having a 3rd child would really stretch our budget and probably our patience for awhile, but my heart tells me that we have so much more love to give.  And I know DH is not on board with more.  I don't know how he can be so certain.  

    And I know that it's not something that I need to decide immediately, but my original plan was to adopt our future child or children from China.  The wait list is so long right now, that even if we decided today to move forward, there would likely be a 7 year gap between our kids, which I don't know if that's something I could do anymore.

    huge hugs. I'm sorry your DH isn't on board. I have similar thoughts. I know that I want more children, but obviously I am not in a position to even consider that anymore. It is really hard when the universe changes our plans on us. I really don't know much about adoption but if you start trying now, and then decide it is too much, can you back out later? And, my little brother is 8 years younger than me. I am closer to him than my sister who is 15m younger than me. Every family dynamic is different, don't let that stress you out too much!
                           
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  • kelbel527 said:
    OK - I have a confession sparked by the sparkle shoe post.  It's tl;dr :)

    I'm worried that we may not have any more kids and some day will regret that decision and potentially resent DH since he's the one who feels we're done.  

    I have moments where I am certain I can't handle anymore kids.  Then I have moments where I really think a 3rd (or even 4th lol) would be a great addition to our family.  My head tells me that having a 3rd child would really stretch our budget and probably our patience for awhile, but my heart tells me that we have so much more love to give.  And I know DH is not on board with more.  I don't know how he can be so certain.  

    And I know that it's not something that I need to decide immediately, but my original plan was to adopt our future child or children from China.  The wait list is so long right now, that even if we decided today to move forward, there would likely be a 7 year gap between our kids, which I don't know if that's something I could do anymore.

    huge hugs. I'm sorry your DH isn't on board. I have similar thoughts. I know that I want more children, but obviously I am not in a position to even consider that anymore. It is really hard when the universe changes our plans on us. I really don't know much about adoption but if you start trying now, and then decide it is too much, can you back out later? And, my little brother is 8 years younger than me. I am closer to him than my sister who is 15m younger than me. Every family dynamic is different, don't let that stress you out too much!
    You might want to look at domestic adoptions.  If you were going to be able to fund an international adoption, more than likely you could a domestic one. 

    Something you might also consider is fostering.  It is a way to give the extra love you have without it being a permanent situation or stretching your budget to the max.  I know it would be hard to let go, but it could also be a wonderful thing for you and your family.

    I agree with Holly about the age differences.   My sister is 4 years older than me and my brother is 9 years older than me.  I have always been way closer with my brother than my sister, but now my sister and I are close enough/ just far enough apart that we have a good relationship and are in similar places in life.  

    DH really wants another because we REALLY wants a boy.  If he wasn't sick, I think I would have caved by now, but because he is sick I just can't imagine it.  I also hope that one day he will be better and we will be able to have another child, but then I freak out that we will both be way older when that happens.
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  • kelbel527 said:
    OK - I have a confession sparked by the sparkle shoe post.  It's tl;dr :)

    I'm worried that we may not have any more kids and some day will regret that decision and potentially resent DH since he's the one who feels we're done.  

    I have moments where I am certain I can't handle anymore kids.  Then I have moments where I really think a 3rd (or even 4th lol) would be a great addition to our family.  My head tells me that having a 3rd child would really stretch our budget and probably our patience for awhile, but my heart tells me that we have so much more love to give.  And I know DH is not on board with more.  I don't know how he can be so certain.  

    And I know that it's not something that I need to decide immediately, but my original plan was to adopt our future child or children from China.  The wait list is so long right now, that even if we decided today to move forward, there would likely be a 7 year gap between our kids, which I don't know if that's something I could do anymore.

    huge hugs. I'm sorry your DH isn't on board. I have similar thoughts. I know that I want more children, but obviously I am not in a position to even consider that anymore. It is really hard when the universe changes our plans on us. I really don't know much about adoption but if you start trying now, and then decide it is too much, can you back out later? And, my little brother is 8 years younger than me. I am closer to him than my sister who is 15m younger than me. Every family dynamic is different, don't let that stress you out too much!
    You might want to look at domestic adoptions.  If you were going to be able to fund an international adoption, more than likely you could a domestic one. 

    Something you might also consider is fostering.  It is a way to give the extra love you have without it being a permanent situation or stretching your budget to the max.  I know it would be hard to let go, but it could also be a wonderful thing for you and your family.

    I agree with Holly about the age differences.   My sister is 4 years older than me and my brother is 9 years older than me.  I have always been way closer with my brother than my sister, but now my sister and I are close enough/ just far enough apart that we have a good relationship and are in similar places in life.  

    DH really wants another because we REALLY wants a boy.  If he wasn't sick, I think I would have caved by now, but because he is sick I just can't imagine it.  I also hope that one day he will be better and we will be able to have another child, but then I freak out that we will both be way older when that happens.
    Thanks @holly_1007 - I know age difference isn't everything.  For me, I just don't know if I could go backwards by the time the boys are 7 & 9.  

    @willy_gert - Yes, I've seriously considered domestic adoption and fostering.  I don't know that I am emotionally equipped to handle being a foster Mom.  I also don't know that my boys are mature enough to have a "sibling" that leaves at some point.  So I would have to wait until they are a little bit older.  My sister is currently fostering a sweet boy and I am already worrying about when/if he could no longer be a part of our lives.

    My current thought is that I would like to do foster-to-adopt (if I could convince DH to have another child).  But the largest reason I prefer international adoption is that I am terrified that I will take a child into my home and his or her Mom will change her mind.  I know that it might be in the best interest of the child, because obviously if his Mom is fit to care for him then that's best, but I love too quickly and would have a hard time letting go.  

    Big Kid Jan 2010

    Littlest Man Sept 2012

  • kelbel527 said:
    OK - I have a confession sparked by the sparkle shoe post.  It's tl;dr :)

    I'm worried that we may not have any more kids and some day will regret that decision and potentially resent DH since he's the one who feels we're done.  

    I have moments where I am certain I can't handle anymore kids.  Then I have moments where I really think a 3rd (or even 4th lol) would be a great addition to our family.  My head tells me that having a 3rd child would really stretch our budget and probably our patience for awhile, but my heart tells me that we have so much more love to give.  And I know DH is not on board with more.  I don't know how he can be so certain.  

    And I know that it's not something that I need to decide immediately, but my original plan was to adopt our future child or children from China.  The wait list is so long right now, that even if we decided today to move forward, there would likely be a 7 year gap between our kids, which I don't know if that's something I could do anymore.
    My DH was definite that he was done with two as well. I think sometimes people just know. For him, it was a matter of finances and not having a totally crazy household. If it were up to me, I would have been open to up to 4 kids.

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  • melody921 said:
    My DH was definite that he was done with two as well. I think sometimes people just know. For him, it was a matter of finances and not having a totally crazy household. If it were up to me, I would have been open to up to 4 kids.
    This is totally a personal question - so feel free to not answer @Melody921 but are you OK that it was really his decision then to stop at 2?  

    I'm still trying to feel out if my DH knows he's done, or if he's just scared about the idea of more.  I can't blame him for the latter.  Our boys can be a challenge somedays. ;)

    Big Kid Jan 2010

    Littlest Man Sept 2012

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