GAAAHH!!!! My MIL is driving me nuts!!!

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

I'm so angry with her right now. My ILs are supposed to come to visit NEXT WEEK for a really important event that I haven't talked about here previously. Suffice it to say it's really important and they are the ones who wanted to come. DH wanted them here and so of course they need to be here.

My MIL lives in MT. She hasn't bought a plane ticket yet!!!! Seriously. She's waiting for the price to drop. She is expecting the price to drop because they always drop at the last minute. According to her.

My FIL already has his ticket booked because originally she wasn't going to come. Then realized she can't stay by herself because of her health. She's pretty much bed ridden. She still hasn't bought her ticket. I am getting really angry because if she doesn't buy her freaking ticket the price is going to go up to 800 dollars and she'll be upset she has to pay that much or she isn't going to be able to get on the flight at all. We already give them money every month. We're already paying for her hotel room here. If she can't get on the flight or refuses to pay that much my FIL can't come. This puts the event in jeopardy for DH and it's completely selfish of her.

Every time we tell her she isn't going to get a lower price and here's why she just says "the Lord is telling me to do this." GAH! I'm religious and believe in prayer but come on! The Lord is not going to tell you to wait to buy a plane ticket until the day you are supposed to leave! That's her plan. To wait until that day. WHY!?

She's already emotionally fragile and has tried to commit suicide a few times so we have to tread lightly and walk on eggshells with her. We can't just blow up at her and I really want to! She's being completely selfish, arrogant, prideful, and ridiculous and I'm getting to the end of my rope with this situation. If she doesn't buy her freaking ticket today I will have to call her and I will have to try with every fiber of my being to talk to her calmly. Ugh, I'm so angry.

Thanks for letting me vent. It helped release some of the anger.

gutsymama · August 2014

>:D<

[Deleted User] · August 2014

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[Deleted User] · August 2014

I'm really sorry. Can you buy her ticket and take the cost out of the monthly amount you give them anyway? I hope it works out!

opheliainwaders · August 2014

UGH. Sorry, hon. That is ridiculous!

Any chance you can pass this task off to your DH??

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

mermomo5 said:

I'm so sorry. Hopefully she can pull it together and get the price she wants. I'm sorry if they don't come through for you guys. Can anyone stay with her so FIL can come? I'm guessing not.

Nobody will. There is so much more than I tell you ladies. She is bedridden, manipulative, unproductive and a pot stirrer. I know that if my FIL passes away before she does that DH will be the one that takes her in because her other five children will not. She's too draining. Sadly I hope she passes before my FIL. I could live with my FIL and will probably have to but I don't know if I could live with her.

Maybe that's just my anger talking right now.

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

PickleX said:

I'm really sorry. Can you buy her ticket and take the cost out of the monthly amount you give them anyway? I hope it works out!

The ticket jumped from 320 when they bought FILs to 460. We can't afford that. We have a lot of expense going into this event and we just did some car repairs (and it needs more).

EagleWife · August 2014

Ugh. That stinks.

sorry you guys are getting put through the wringer. >:D<

Stacey099 · August 2014

That's tough >:D< I'd be frustrated too

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

Ophelia, DH has been handling it but she won't budge. She is so stubborn and hard headed. She's ruining the whole event and she just doesn't see it. It makes me not want them here at all but I know that DH would be heartbroken.

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

This is the woman who up until two days before our wedding wasn't sure if she was going to come.

LauraB1016 · August 2014

>:D< I am so sorry that this is stressful for you and DH! Hopefully she comes around and purchases the plane ticket soon!!

MRads · August 2014

>:D<

opheliainwaders · August 2014

Ugh, I kind of wish FIL would just say "screw it" and leave her on her own, or make her pay for the ticket, but I think we all know that probably won't happen ~X(

[Deleted User] · August 2014

Some airlines offer a "companion discount" (for FIL) to those assisting a disabled person with travel. Worth asking the airline?

ETA: They probably don't qualify for that but maybe.

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

They probably do actually PickleX. Hmmm. I'll call delta and check. Thanks.

kaylakim · August 2014

Oh no, lady!!! So sorry!! Stubborn people like that drive me crazy. Hugs and hopes that she buys the freaking ticket already!!

~X(

bayside14 · August 2014

In laws. [-(

Pink724 · August 2014

Ugh, I'm sorry you are dealing with that. I am frustrated for you.

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

Byjove03 said:

So frustrating! Not to be crank, but if she is bedridden, should she be traveling? I realize there is a lot that we obviously don't know. >:D<

She has fibromyalgia, chronic joint issues and some fainting issues. I didn't think she would come because of all of this but she REALLY wants to be here for it. Like she said it would take death to keep her from coming. Well it looks like death and pride at this point. That aside she can't walk well but is fine in a wheelchair or using her walker. She just has to have FIL with her. She can't stay home by herself. So either they both come or neither comes.

Caitable25 · August 2014

I'm sorry you have to deal with this. >:D<. I hope things get resolved ASAP.

[Deleted User] · August 2014

Yikes! Now I'm curious about this special event

Good luck getting everything worked out >:D<

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

It's a lot of information so I just haven't told you all. It's a religious ceremony. Essentially we are getting our church wedding.

So in the Catholic church (I believe, I might be wrong) you can get married civilly but the church doesn't recognize your marriage. Right? Well in the Mormon faith the church recognizes a civil marriage but it's not the same as the church wedding.

We believe that families can be together forever. That our marriage doesn't end with death. There is no 'til death do you part in the vows. We believe that if you get married in the temple you can be together for eternity.

We are doing that. We are having our temple wedding essentially and so she of course wants to be there. We would love for them to be there.

She is making the whole thing about her at this point and it's souring it for me. I shouldn't have this much drama and anger surrounding my beautiful wedding ceremony. But she did this with our civil ceremony so I shouldn't be surprised.

[Deleted User] · August 2014

That sounds really special and I hope she doesn't ruin it for you all

Thanks for telling us so I didn't sit and ponder all the possibilities!

[Deleted User] · August 2014

Do you have a dress? Or is it not an event for a wedding dress? I love wedding dresses.

bumpuser8571475 · August 2014

How frustrating! Especially because you can't blow up at her. I'm sorry you have to deal with this.. I hope she changes her mind and buys her ticket today!

stephyfaith · August 2014

I'm sorry

hope it gets worked out soon!

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

I didn't get a special dress this time. There are specific dress standards and there are not a lot of options in this area. If we were in utah I probably would have purchased a new dress. It's just too hard in our area to find something. It has to be pure white, long sleeved, floor length and to the collarbone. I could order some beautiful ones online but I would want to try it on first.

giraffeluvspi · August 2014

I'm sorry, dear. My Mom was using the same "prices will drop" excuse to buy her tickets to come to Sully's first birthday. I ended up just buying the tickets for her and her BF, and later she admitted she just didn't have the funds. That's $850 I don't expect to see again, but at least they were here.

I hope she makes it.

PrimRoseMama · August 2014

You have all my sorries!!

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

@picklex I would love something similar to this https://www.adressyoccasion.com/images/temple/810006-SC-Hannah.jpg

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

this is probably easier

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

Thank you NCC! That's what I thought.

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

BetsyD2010 said:

Ugh she sounds like a PITA. Don't let her drama outshine your happy. What a special day for you and Mr. Sparky. I'm sure you will be a beautiful bride.... again! We expect pics now that you spilled the beans, Missy.

$:\$ "> Haha! Thanks. I'm sure a few pictures will be taken. I really need to go shopping for a nice dress to wear after. We aren't doing much but the kids are part of the ceremony as well so we need to get haircuts and new outfits.

SMac85 · August 2014

So frustrating! I hope you don't let her ruin your special day and I hope you tell us all about it after. Hopefully your MIL will realize this day is about you and your husband. Sending positive thoughts your way.

[Deleted User] · August 2014

I love the dress! My mother's wedding dress is actually pretty similar - so pretty. Congrats!

I have a question - I was raised totally atheist and I just legitimately don't know and I hope no one takes offense - in other religions, is it supposed that if a couple goes to heaven, each partner can date or have a different partner if a marriage is only "'til death" ?

Carrie3102 · August 2014

How frustrating. I'm sorry.

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

I think most religions believe you are with your family. We just have a special ceremony to make sure.
Also miracle of Miracles she bought the ticket. Dh threatened her with a phone call from me. She likes me so that scared her.

stephyfaith · August 2014

@PickleX‌ I'm a Christian (non denominational) and we believe that there is no marriage in heaven so that if you do marry again after your spouse has passed, it doesn't affect the afterlife. In heaven you are with the ones you love, but you're not going to live as "husband and wife" in heaven as we are "married to Christ". Hope that makes sense.

[Deleted User] · August 2014

stephyfaith said:

@PickleX‌ I'm a Christian (non denominational) and we believe that there is no marriage in heaven so that if you do marry again after your spouse has passed, it doesn't affect the afterlife. In heaven you are with the ones you love, but you're not going to live as "husband and wife" in heaven as we are "married to Christ". Hope that makes sense.

Got it. So I might still have a chance with the hunks of yore

sparkymcgeee · August 2014

juliedave151 said:

Well I'm glad to hear she bought the ticket. Hopefully she doesn't do anything annoying when she comes.

Let's not go overboard here.

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GAAAHH!!!! My MIL is driving me nuts!!!

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