Body Image during Pregnancy

Sarah1253 · July 2014

I am so sorry you are dealing with this. I have always been thin and fit. I usually weigh around 103lbs just naturally However I am so excited to have a baby bump. I think Pregnant women are so cute and I fully intend on keeping myself up and dressing in cute maternity clothes during my pregnancy. I am sure you will have no problem getting back to your normal weight after you havety your baby. The first few weeks might be hard but stay positive.

[Deleted User] · July 2014

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kelsz12 · August 2014

The most important thing that I keep in my mind is that I make sure I am eating the right foods for me and my baby. I have accepted the fact that the weight gain is coming, but as long as I am fueling my body and this baby properly, I know recovery after birth will be that much easier. For me, not eating junk is key. I allow myself as much vegetables as I want through the day, I make sure I get good fats (coconut oil, eggs, olive oil, nut butters, etc.) and plenty of protein (eggs, Greek yogurt mostly, I have NOT been wanting meat at all). I still allow myself one splurge meal per week and that helps keep me from wanting to eat junk through the rest of the week. You can do this!

2JEL · August 2014

kyungsoo, I'm not sure if you're still following this thread, it appears to be old, but (especially because the first 5-10 posters jumped on here and implied your fiance was a jerk) I just wanted to point out that having dealt with a body image disorder and also helped friends who struggled with anorexia, my impression is that your fiance is probably not a jerk or at least, he's not concerned with you losing weight, but that you are projecting those concerns/pressures onto him, when he was probably just saying whatever he thought he could to make you more comfortable eating for two. I myself have learned that what I thought was an attempt to help save the life of an anorexic friend (by encouraging her to eat more) was actually counterproductive and making her even more defensive-- so I'm willing to give your fiance the benefit of the doubt for loving you and your baby and wanting to make you less afraid of weight gain as opposed to being some sort of controlling monster.

Second, nobody else has pointed out that being vegetarian will almost always lead to your body needing extra iron, calcium and protein unless you are extremely aggressive about eating more of the right kinds of lentils, etc. Therefore, from a nutritional perspective, it is entirely unsurprising to me that your body is craving ice cream and it is probably better than "healthy" vegetarian food like fruits and veggies that isn't going to supply you with much calcium or protein or iron. I'm not pushing it as a health food but I think your body wants it for a reason. It's possible that if you up your intake of black beans, chick peas and greek yogurt you will want less ice cream but I'm not a nutritionist and highly suggest you check in with one for a day to day diet plan. I'm thinking it might comfort you to be following a very structured regimen where you know it is targeted towards you eating exactly what baby needs and gaining exactly the appropriate amount of weight-- which, as others have noted, at age 21 you are extremely likely to lose again after without much effort.

It looks like this website https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/pregnancy-and-eating-disorders specifically has (free) support resources for women struggling with eating disorders and pregnancy and the left side of the page even has a click to chat button if you'd prefer to talk via IM.

Finally, I just want to say that you are extremely brave for being open and addressing both your fears and frustrations-- several women do find that pregnancy and motherhood give them the motivation to finally beat their disordered eating habits and you've taken the first steps towards freedom and health plus it sounds like you have a fiance who is on board and supportive (even if your own internal fears cause you to doubt that he loves you with a few extra pounds, I know first hand the patience required of constantly monitoring and arguing with a loved one who is anorexic, and I am 100% sure that if he's sticking by you now and doing his best to be supportive as you battle against your anorexic tendencies that he's in love with you enough that he's not going to run from you and his child if it takes you a few months to get back to a shape you feel comfortable).

Good luck!

Nalexandraaa · August 2014

I was only 98lbs when I got pregnant and even though people made fun of me for being skinny I LOVED it. It took me a while to be comfortable with my body and I finally was. I've gained weight all over now and I have the same thoughts. It helps for me to look at other women and how much they have gained and ik That's horrible but it makes me feel a little better. My bf isn't so hard on me he actually likes the weight I've gained but he himself is very small and I can't help but feel like a whale next to him. I tell myself the same thing. Like as long as my baby is healthy it's Okay but I find myself being depressed over my old body quite often. I'm bipolar and I take meds for it which should help but I'm not too sure. The best advice I can give is to talk to a behavioral health specialist. Ik it's corny but it hwlps me.
Hope things get better!

duckie23 · August 2014

I hope you are getting professional help. This is not healthy for you or your baby, and it doesn't sound like you have the healthiest relationship either. You can do the right thing, even if it's hard.

Kurtz No More! · August 2014

Pregnancy is rough. Body image during pregnancy is rough. I am doing the same as you, just thinking about the baby being healthy. It helps that when my sister's beautiful baby girl was born, in the crib next to her in the nursery was a skinny, sickly, unhealthy looking baby. I don't want my baby to look like that. Additionally, my sister and I have a friend that didn't gain hardly any weight during any of her pregnancies and all her kids have several health problems (related to her not gaining weight). I'm gaining weight. I look fat. I'm disgusted when I look in the mirror. I don't fit into any of the clothes. But, I'm going to have one beautiful, healthy baby!! And between breast feeding, the extra work of raising a child, and my own efforts, I'll lose the weight after the baby is born. Also, look into some maternity clothes alternatives, and maternity fashion, there's lot of great advice out there!

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