i need some advice. no judgement please

Re: i need some advice. no judgement please

• literarymuse member

  July 2014

  Stargirlb said:

  Amazing how these patterns play out exactly the same in so many guys.

  I think you mean people. We hear about men more, but abusiveness happens just as often with women.
  
  To the OP: others have given great advice. You don't have to immediately make the decision to leave or stay, but you do need to immediately reach out to others for support and help. No one should be treated the way you have been treated. You are precious, and your baby is precious. You both deserve a whole, happy life. Do what it takes to make sure you get it. 

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• StarLiteKiss member

  August 2014

  This sounds similar to what I delt with with my ex husband. There is help you can reach out to. Temporary assistance if needed/ safe house if needed. Although you may feel you have no one its not true, there is help out there. Only you can make the decision to leave him or not BuT I will say that emotional abuse can turn into physical abuse. I know from experience and got out of my marriage when he had me pinned against the wall in front of both my 2 1/2 year old and 6 month old ( they are now 9 and 7 and I am in a healthy relationship now). I hope things work out for the best for you.

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• Bigboneded member

  August 2014

  It seems a lot of people have seen this or lived it. I hope you looked at the link on cycle of abuse, if it looks familiar- he will need help to change, and not from you.
  
  you dont want a baby in that situation, because even if he never does it to baby, he models that behavior for baby. So little girls learn to take that shit and little boys learn to dish it out.
  
  I am so sorry for the loss of your parents, and I know when you are in the midst of a situation it can be hard to see the big picture. Are you sure you have no one besides him in your life? How long have you been with him?
  
  As a young single mother there are lots of resources available, so you would have help.
  I wish you luck, will keep you in my prayers. I hope you update everyone, and take advantage of the offers to PM people who have experience and can offer real life advice.

  

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• kbeers18 member

  August 2014

  I am so sorry you are going through this. You don't deserve this and your baby certainly doesn't either. Please reach out for help, there's opportunities for you and women's shelters or safe places until something more permanent comes. Hoping for only safety and the best for you and your baby.

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• MaPetiteFamille member

  August 2014

  Please leave. These situations don't get better, they get worse. Emotional abuse frequently escalates to physical abuse, and women who are pregnant are at an increased risk for homicide, which is the leading cause of death among pregnant women.

  Also, think about your child. From BabyCenter: "Research shows that child abuse occurs in anywhere from one-third to more than three-quarters of families in which a partner is also being abused. And even if the child is not abused directly, studies show that children who witness one adult abusing the other within the home are at risk of becoming violent themselves or entering into a violent relationship when they grow up. They're also at high risk for depression and many other psychological and behavioral problems."

  You're better off alone than with this person.

  
  

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