FFFC

hordol · July 2014

bacorrea said:
I don't understand bedtime questions. DD goes to sleep whenever she is tired. Sometimes she STTN (5hrs) sometimes she wants to eat a couple of times. We have zero routine, I just follow her cues. It seems to work for us.

It's not always as easy as "they'll sleep when they're tired!" though. You're lucky that your DD will sleep when she is tired because not all babies do that, so that's why there are so many sleep threads.

my DS is one that is really difficult to get to sleep and he is always overtired because the only way I can get him to take a decent nap is to hold him the whole time and go into a dark QUIET room for an hour and a half. Which means I get nothing done if I want him to take naps, so this is a never ending battle. He doesn't sleep on the go anymore like he used to when he was brand new.

J&NL · July 2014

dani+california said:
Sometimes reading how much everyone misses their LO when they're apart makes me feel like a douche. At the wedding I was in a couple weeks ago, we were gone all day and one of the groomsmen asked me at night 'so, you miss your little guy?' I didn't even hesitate before I said 'ha, no!' and he seriously looked taken aback.

I was gone 12 hours not 12 days! I was appreciating the adult time and hanging with friends. From now on I'll just say yes to avoid the side-eyes.

I'm the same way. I take all the adult time I can get and am often upset it didn't last longer. If DS wasn't such a baby about taking the bottle, I would probably leave him with my parents tomorrow so I can go fishing in peace rather than toting him with me.

J&NL · July 2014

Teresa1896 said:
I have a friend who had no medical issues or "reasons" not to bf; she just thought it was "gross." For someone who went through the grossness of pregnancy, labor and delivery, to be grossed out by BFing seems very immature.
But I kept my feelings to myself. At the end of the day I don't care how anybody feeds their kid.

This is how my SIL and BIL are now so I nurse in front of them as much as I can. Not so they get used to it. I do it to spite them. Fuckers.

PoppySeedWindsor · July 2014

smushi said:

I thought my phone was vibrating. Turns out I was sitting on the monkey teether...

FFFC #2: We just busted the vibrating monkey teether. I gave it to her yesterday while pushing the vibration and thought..."Huh. That's a nice vibration."

J&NL · July 2014

Ok my confession... I try to keep up with my hobbies as much as I can despite having two kids because I don't want to be looked at as just a "mom". Not that there is anything wrong with that title, I just don't want to "lose" myself just because I have kids.

Another, sometimes I wish I didn't BF because I so desperately want to leave DS and DD with the grandparents so DH and I can have a mini weekend getaway by ourselves.

smushi · July 2014

@hordol DH used to try to randomly throw a blanket over me and LO and I would be all like back the eff off dude. Now he just doesn't care in most situations. This coming from the man who two years ago wouldn't turn around when my friend visited and fed her baby WITH a cover. He was so freaked out he stared at his computer for an hour after she was finished. I was like, She's done, sweety. DH: Oh thank goodness, I really had to pee!

hordol · July 2014

@smushi‌ haha that's ridiculous! DH thankfully hasn't thrown a blanket over me but I do notice he tries to sit strategically to block me. He never notices or cares when he sees other women breastfeeding but apparently he thinks I'm just gonna flop my boobs all over the place or something.

Ashleypixie · July 2014

I forgot my anniversary was next week. He suggested we go out of town for the weekend and I was like,"why would we do that?" I apparently couldn't care less about my husband.

eireyes · July 2014

hordol said:

My fffc is pretty lame, but I always have to gloss over any post where someone is talking about how much milk they pumped because I always get irrationally jealous.

Not lame! My friend couldn't BF her three kids because she could never produce enough. I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum, and I tend to keep my mouth shut because I know it can be a zinger for some moms!

JessieAlbin · July 2014

SoulTermination said:

Cecilbear said:

Yes! At four days old, DD landed in the ER bc she was dehydrated. Her doctor tried to bully and shame me into FF. At that point I was hating BF-ing so much I was ready to quit. If it weren't for my mom insisting the hospital send down the most wonderful lactation consultant in the world, I'd have given up right then and there. I really don't care what other mothers and families choose to do, but I'm really grateful for my mom swooping in at that moment in the er when I was totally vulnerable. Almost three months in, I really love BF-ing and think it's so convenient!
This reminds me of the head LC the hospital when A was born. A was in danger of losing too much weight because my milk hadn't come in yet and her pedi said we should supplement with formula. When DH mentioned that to one of the student nurses who was getting ready to give A her Hep vaccine, the LC shot him a death glare and DH was all deer-in-the-headlights, lol.

If any medical professional had shot my husband a death glare as a brand new dad repeating another medical professional's advice, I would have lost it and requested they leave. Ain't nobody got time for that awful bedside manner!!!

hlm184 · July 2014

I'm not very good at hand expressing, but one time when I was engorged, I was able to shoot a stream across the shower. I immediately hopped out and ran over to DH, saying "GUESS WHAT?!" and shot him in the face.

JessieAlbin · July 2014

We tried and tried to BF, and my boobs wouldn't cooperate. People ask me all the time if I am "still breastfeeding", and when I say that sadly no, we tried for a month and my milk never came in, every damn person becomes a critical BF expert. "Did you try (insert xyz)?" Um, how about fuck you very much! I wanna throw a water balloon at every asshole who asks if I drank enough water.

Sullivan is thriving on formula and it ended up being very good for my family but it is still a sore spot. People are tactless.

baileymama3 · July 2014

Per @Serenla‌

I guess that is my confession, it drives DH nuts that the windows are open and I have nothing on from the waste up. I just don't care, the baby is blocking most of the view anyway.

100x this. My boobs are always out. Back patio, front room, I pump in kitchen with door open... I also nurse without a cover in my house regardless of who is there. My house, my boobs, my baby!
My lack of modesty in general should be my FFFC.

Edit: quote not working

Cecilbear · July 2014

@JessieAlbin‌ Why do people even care? That's like someone asking me at 8 months pregnant if I was dilating yet. Are you kidding me?

J&NL · July 2014

My three year old has been driving me fucking nuts so my temper has even getting shorter and shorter with her. I handed her a cheese stick and for some reason she let it drop to the floor and then proceeded to try to pick it up with her foot.. So I lost my shit and screamed "not with your foot!!!" She walked away pouty and now I feel like a horrible mom.

mamahann · July 2014

hordol said:

My fffc is pretty lame, but I always have to gloss over any post where someone is talking about how much milk they pumped because I always get irrationally jealous.

Love tit-ing in sympathy! It hits a nerve when I see women who are pumping 8+ounces asking how they can increase their supply. I call it a good day when I get 8oz total!

hordol · July 2014

JessieAlbin said:
We tried and tried to BF, and my boobs wouldn't cooperate. People ask me all the time if I am "still breastfeeding", and when I say that sadly no, we tried for a month and my milk never came in, every damn person becomes a critical BF expert. "Did you try (insert xyz)?" Um, how about fuck you very much! I wanna throw a water balloon at every asshole who asks if I drank enough water.

Sullivan is thriving on formula and it ended up being very good for my family but it is still a sore spot. People are tactless.

People can be frustrating. They really need to learn not to offer advice without being asked. I know it's hard when you think you know exactly what they need, but most people who are struggling with bfing or stopped bfing didn't just have an issue and say, "huh, that's weird. Guess I'll just stop!" My mil is always like, "you need to drink lots of water! You need to drInk beer! Are you eating enough? You need at least 2000 calories!" (Lady, do you really want to know how much I eat? There's a reason this baby weight isn't coming off...) it's so irritating and people just need to trust that people who are struggling aren't dumbasses and yes, have already tried multiple suggestions.

Keckers · July 2014

hordol said:
My fffc is pretty lame, but I always have to gloss over any post where someone is talking about how much milk they pumped because I always get irrationally jealous.

FFFC: On the same note, I have a really hard time reading BF posts because I can get pretty jealous of anyone who was successful with BF. I'm so grateful that EPing is an option (and working for us), but I did grieve the end of our BF pursuits. Sounds silly, but it's true.

AmberLiz99 · July 2014

J&NL said:
My three year old has been driving me fucking nuts so my temper has even getting shorter and shorter with her. I handed her a cheese stick and for some reason she let it drop to the floor and then proceeded to try to pick it up with her foot.. So I lost my shit and screamed "not with your foot!!!" She walked away pouty and now I feel like a horrible mom.

Sounds like we are having similar days

juniper75 · July 2014

I have a love hate relationship with breastfeeding. I lasted 13 months with my first and then had 6 months off before starting to BF LO. I actually don't mind breastfeeding but I really suck at everything that goes with it. DD1 started refusing bottles at 6 months so it was all mommy all the time. I haven't been able to get LO to take a bottle yet either. I can't seem to find the time to pump and build a stash anyways.... I have NIP a few times but I have huge boobs and always have to support the boob with one hand so I am not one of these super breastfeeding moms that can just nurse while walking around and doing things...

What has made me contemplate quiting several times is the complete lack of me time and never having a break from late night feedings etc... Breastfeeding is hard work! I considered supplementing this time around to make things easier and DH gave me a total guilt trip about it so I didn't...

juniper75 · July 2014

J&NL said:
My three year old has been driving me fucking nuts so my temper has even getting shorter and shorter with her. I handed her a cheese stick and for some reason she let it drop to the floor and then proceeded to try to pick it up with her foot.. So I lost my shit and screamed "not with your foot!!!" She walked away pouty and now I feel like a horrible mom.

I feel your pain - my 22 month old is testing her boundaries and has been a real jerk lately and I have been a bit snappy a few times. One of her games lately is to scream in LO's face because it makes her cry.... I started calling her Dexter

Dixon813 · July 2014

embear22 said:

@Ashleypixie‌ I forgot my husband's birthday two years ago and our anniversary for 2 straight years. So... it happens... lol

My husbands birthday is the same day as our anniversary... So if I forget one? I'd probably forget the other. Thankfully I haven't. Though it is just a couple weeks away and no idea to gifts!!

J&NL · July 2014

jellysparkles said:

J&NL said:
My three year old has been driving me fucking nuts so my temper has even getting shorter and shorter with her. I handed her a cheese stick and for some reason she let it drop to the floor and then proceeded to try to pick it up with her foot.. So I lost my shit and screamed "not with your foot!!!" She walked away pouty and now I feel like a horrible mom.
My patience goes back and forth between nonexistent or giving absolutely zero fucks. I need to find a happy medium.

That's how I am too.

Alana526 · July 2014

The word "y'all" annoys the heck out of me. Dont hate me. I could tolerate it until Andi from the bachelorette said it.

strawberrytree · July 2014

J&NL said:
My three year old has been driving me fucking nuts so my temper has even getting shorter and shorter with her. I handed her a cheese stick and for some reason she let it drop to the floor and then proceeded to try to pick it up with her foot.. So I lost my shit and screamed "not with your foot!!!" She walked away pouty and now I feel like a horrible mom.

I have done this too with my 2 year old. Usually because I'm super frustrated with something LO is doing (another massive poop right after I changed him, waking up after 5 minutes...you know, being a baby) and DS does something mildly annoying but is really just being a toddler, and I end up yelling at him. Usually ends up with me crying and telling him I'm sorry for yelling. I guess I'm modelling apologies.

PoppySeedWindsor · July 2014

Keckers said:

My fffc is pretty lame, but I always have to gloss over any post where someone is talking about how much milk they pumped because I always get irrationally jealous.
FFFC: On the same note, I have a really hard time reading BF posts because I can get pretty jealous of anyone who was successful with BF. I'm so grateful that EPing is an option (and working for us), but I did grieve the end of our BF pursuits. Sounds silly, but it's true.

It doesn't sound silly at all. Give yourself compassion :-)

strawberrytree · July 2014

I have a FB friend who likes to post lots of gym selfies, whatever organic quinoa dish she had for dinner, how much weight she lifted, how far she ran, holier-that-thou diet advice, etc. Well she just posted a picture of herself at 30 weeks pregnant and I was thrilled to see that her ass is ENORMOUS.

edoliesmom · July 2014

mamahann said:
DD is almost 17 weeks and I have yet to nurse in public.

The NE A14 meetup tomorrow will probably be the first time I do it and I'm pretty anxious about it

What better support group could you have than that!? I'm jealous.

But I understand, I would be anxious too. I've only done it once, and I felt pretty empowered after that. Do what's most comfortable for you!

Re people making comments about stopping BFing: I can't tell you how many times I've been asked if I breast feed her, but it's been a lot. Whenever I say yes, I always get, "Good for you!" or "good girl!" But what if BFing hadn't came so easily to me and I had to stop? Or whatever other reason? Now I'll be thinking of y'all who get those comments whenever someone asks me, and I'll feel a little stabby for you depending on the response I get. Some people!

J&NL · July 2014

I hate when people make their southern accent stronger when they get around certain people. Per the book, I'm definetly considered a redneck or country (fishing, hunting, truck loving, live in the country, ect) but I do not fake a southern accent.

I do say y'all like it's going out of style though. Always have always will.

Cecilbear · July 2014

strawberrytree said:
I have a FB friend who likes to post lots of gym selfies, whatever organic quinoa dish she had for dinner, how much weight she lifted, how far she ran, holier-that-thou diet advice, etc. Well she just posted a picture of herself at 30 weeks pregnant and I was thrilled to see that her ass is ENORMOUS.

LOL!

heybulldog52 · July 2014

@JessieAlbin‌ @embear22‌ my supply came in late and was low as well. I had been supplementing with formula from the start and always felt ashamed for it. I saw two different LCs, lived off fenugreek, oatmeal, and gallons of water and pumped 10-12 times a day and still wasn't able to produce more than 1/2-1 oz per session. I gave up after 8 weeks (I'm proud for even getting that far). I still get asked "did you try this?" "Did you do that?"... I just smile and nod knowing that I'm doing what is best for me and my family. At the end of the day that's all that matters.

Sorry long winded... This topic really hits home! I guess my FFFC is that I still sometimes feel disappointed and upset that I was unable to provide BM for my baby. It was some thing I really wanted to be able to do... Along with a natural birth but I ended up with emergency c-section. Such is life, right?

smushi · July 2014

FFFC #2... Seeing my own siggy makes me cringe. Creepy Brad Pitt baby...

PoppySeedWindsor · July 2014

smushi said:

FFFC #2... Seeing my own siggy makes me cringe. Creepy Brad Pitt baby...

Especially because he has cute little baby boobies.

Emily041285 · July 2014

Second FFFC: when I'm doing multiple loads of laundry I make sure all my clothes get done first since I don't do it all at once. Hey, if you want your clothes clean you start doing the laundry!

railroadRN · July 2014

Not a real juicy confession, but I've got baby fever again! I caught myself browsing baby names this week for the next LO. I miss being pregnant. It was awesome.

Alana526 · July 2014

J&NL said:

I hate when people make their southern accent stronger when they get around certain people. Per the book, I'm definetly considered a redneck or country (fishing, hunting, truck loving, live in the country, ect) but I do not fake a southern accent. I do say y'all like it's going out of style though. Always have always will.

I would probably say yall too if I moved down South. I say "waw-ter" and "draw" for drawer like there's no tomorrow haha Stupid NY accent.

JessieAlbin · July 2014

I moved to the south and I picked up y'all. Traded pop in for it. I regret nothing!

I also realized that I play baby favorites and there are a few A14 babies I just can't get over how cute they are. They are all cute (duh) but there are a few I could just pinch their cheeks all day! And then I realized every one of those kids has a very similar look to Sullivan. And I do, in fact, pinch his cheeks all day. This discovery fascinates me and makes me wanna do a social experiment and see if all new moms tend to respond to photos of babies who have a similar build or look to their own? Is it a mother baby bond thing? Mama instinct? Do y'all respond more strongly on a gut level to A14 babies who remind you of your little one?

PoppySeedWindsor · July 2014

JessieAlbin said:

I moved to the south and I picked up y'all. Traded pop in for it. I regret nothing! I also realized that I play baby favorites and there are a few A14 babies I just can't get over how cute they are. They are all cute (duh) but there are a few I could just pinch their cheeks all day! And then I realized every one of those kids has a very similar look to Sullivan. And I do, in fact, pinch his cheeks all day. This discovery fascinates me and makes me wanna do a social experiment and see if all new moms tend to respond to photos of babies who have a similar build or look to their own? Is it a mother baby bond thing? Mama instinct? Do y'all respond more strongly on a gut level to A14 babies who remind you of your little one?

I can't say there are babies here who I see and am like, "GAH that's an ugly baby." But I have before and there are babies who don't...IDK...quite "do it" for me. Maybe it IS because they don't look like Merriwether. Maybe it's because they're boys. Interesting thought you bring up.

edoliesmom · July 2014

JessieAlbin said:
I moved to the south and I picked up y'all. Traded pop in for it. I regret nothing!

I also realized that I play baby favorites and there are a few A14 babies I just can't get over how cute they are. They are all cute (duh) but there are a few I could just pinch their cheeks all day! And then I realized every one of those kids has a very similar look to Sullivan. And I do, in fact, pinch his cheeks all day. This discovery fascinates me and makes me wanna do a social experiment and see if all new moms tend to respond to photos of babies who have a similar build or look to their own? Is it a mother baby bond thing? Mama instinct? Do y'all respond more strongly on a gut level to A14 babies who remind you of your little one?

Hmmm... Interesting! I don't think I do, but I can't say that for sure. Next HDBD I'll pay closer attention. (I lovetit all but usually only open certain ones to get a closer look.) Now I'm curious to know which babies resemble Sullivan.

Twirple · July 2014

I am very much an advocate of BFing and its benefits, however, I have a friend who tried and struggled to BF and then was ridiculed for FFing her son. This is why one of the only two pieces of unsolicited advice I give to new moms/mom's to be is "if for some reason you can't or don't breastfeed, you're still a great mom."

Now, if someone asks for advice, I'm full of wisdom.

After reading this thread, I'm picturing all of the NE meetup ladies sitting around a park with their boobs hanging out!

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