Probably an UO (sex disappointment)

nopegoat · July 2014

@mlee116 I feel like she is basing it off of her experiences and what she has heard, which IMO are normal. I have two boys. My first was like the easiest baby ever. My second is the exact opposite. If my second would have been a girl, I probably would have assumed its because she was a different sex than my first. I am not saying she is 100% right, but I don't think she is totally wrong for her opinions either.

Call me old fashioned, but I do believe that some of the characteristics are more prone in different sexes. That's why SOME stereotypes exist. Obviously stereotypes aren't always true.

ETA: Also to clarify, before I get flamed for being sexist, I was always a tomboy. I was raised, and firmly believe, that woman are not the weaker sex and can do anything a man does. I also believe we should not get special treatment just because we have a vagina. However, I do believe that woman tend to be more emotional, ect and it is just a hormonal trait, just like men tend to be more aggressive and physical.

Once again sorry if I am not making sense. So much word vomit today.

Annya26 · July 2014

I would find out... I feel like anyone who is going to have sex disappointment should find out so that they aren't taking a risk of the first emotion they feel when they look at their new baby being disappointment.

I know I will have some level of disappointment if this baby is a boy. We have three boys between us, and this is 100% the last baby. If this is a boy then I will have to lay to rest my dreams of having a little girl. Doesn't mean I won't LOVE another little boy, and think it will be fantastic to watch the 4 boys play and grow together - but for my own selfish reasons I want a daughter.

As the others said though, there is a good chance that this baby will be very different - boy or girl. My older sister was SUPER high maintenance, high strung and temperamental as a child. I was the next born and I was so laid back my Mom said sometimes she would be out for lunch with a friend or on the phone and forget I was there :P My little sister was somewhere in the middle. You just never know!

Either way I will cross my fingers for a boy for you

brittandjp · July 2014

I did not take the time to read through every response, so forgive me if this has already been said.

If you're that worried about the stress and PPD that could come from having another girl, I'd certainly think finding out now is the better option. Finding out will allow you the time to "grieve" over not having another boy. If you found out on D day that baby was a girl, then the added stress after delivering a baby wouldn't be good for anyone! Allow time for yourself to prepare and hopefully feel that connection.

That being said, just because your first girl is difficult doesn't mean they all will be. Granted, I only have one child and she is a girl. She is rather needy, super sensitive, and obsessed with Mommy. These things drive me crazy from time to time, but there are so many other great qualities that outshine the frustrating ones. Just because these are her traits doesn't mean my next baby will or won't have them, regardless of sex. I have friends with boys that are so incredibly difficult. Putting all girls into that category and leaving the boys out isn't fair to your new babe either way.

I think you need to find out what you're having. Be optimistic that he or she will be more easy going. Focus on the exciting future that is to come by adding another little blessing to your family.

allonsyalonso · July 2014

@gradschoolmom1234 Bringing Up Bebe was absolutely the best thing I could have read before my son was born. I don't agree with everything she said, but a lot of it made so much sense. We've never had a real sleeping issue, when he isn't cutting new teeth he eats whatever we feed him, and he's super polite for a 15 month old. I highly recommend that book to anyone who is about to have a baby.

BabyRN2009 · July 2014

I have 2 girls and they are polar opposites! #1 is mellow and obedient, #2 is crazy and rebellious! :-P If you're worried about ppd, I would find out so you have time to adjust to the idea of 2 girls.

irishtriplets · July 2014

I had heard horror stories of oh girls are so much harder. It's reassuring to know personality isn't a sec attribute. So I stand corrected. She's really not all bad. I'm emotional. Dealing with a spirited 18 month old is very hard 18 weeks pregnant.

BrideLinds · July 2014

You say you worry about her self-esteem yet you said you and your husband have a favorite child. Don't you think that your actions will reflect that (subconsciously at least) and hurt her self-esteem more?

I get sex disappointment, but this is a bit extreme. I think it's best for you to find out the sex now so you can prepare accordingly.

nevah18 · July 2014

I have 2 boys and they are night and day in personality. One is sweet, loving and plays plays well by himself. The other is a little terror who has a larger than life personality you can't help but love because gosh he has a cute smile and is a momma's boy. I love them for different reasons because they are different human beings. I really hope this kid is a girl though, boys are destructive! Also that and I'm not looking forward to teenage years. I had brothers, they were gross.

cyjofotos · July 2014

I have 3 girls......All 3 are drama laden and wanna be beauty queens. The plus side is if you still have all your baby girl stuff you and hand it down. Also my younger two are close and play well together. They are roughly 2 years apart. If you feel like you are going to have PPD definitely discuss it with your doctor. I suffered with it severely after my 1st was born. ((hugs))

At this point I'm honestly hoping for another girl because I already have EVERYTHING for a girl......bottles, swing, car seat, clothes- NB and up.

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