I just want to introduce myself and express my frustration over this TTC journey. I was at the bump a lot with my DD who is 4 now and it really helped to talk to likeminded people, especially when you don't have many in RL to talk to about this.
I spit up from ex about 2 years ago when DD was 2, it was really tough and I'm still not entirely over it. The whole family illusion broke me down and I still hope to have a 'family' one day. But I also want a second child and a sibling for DD so I started IUI about a year ago. I did 5 tries until I went to IVF and I wish I had done that from the beginning due to my AMA (I have reached the magic 40 now). I did one fresh ET the first month which was *hell*, I was extremely depressed. I then did a second frozen ET and because it was a blastocyst, had to wait until today to POS. I got a BFN :-( Here is the killer: I was completely convinced that I was pregnant. From morning sickness to no AF, from dizziness and implantation cramps, even sore breasts. With the BFN I completely lost my confidence in my body. How can I be so convinced and then nothing? I'm traveling for work right now so I'm all alone and all I can do is write my few friends a text "no baby this time either".
I know that trying for a year is not much compared to many others but this is just so frustrating. The emotional ups and downs are bound to affect my ability to get pregnant. Also, what do you guys do? Do you refrain from drinking *all the time* or just when you are trying? I could really need a glass of wine tonight. I'm considering acupuncture. Any advice is welcome :-)
Single mom of DD (2010), TTC #2 since June 2013.
Occasionally I'm blogging about my life with
flybaby.
Re: Intro and a bit sad (child mentioned)
First of all-- I am sorry to hear all the things you are going through. Sounds like you have been on a hard, long journey, but I hope it gets better soon and you get your BFP.
Secondly-- Yes! Have your wine! The fetus doesn't absorb alcohol until you are 6 weeks pg, so go for it.
Welcome to the board!
My BFP Chart
<br /> My Ovulation Chart</a>
I can relate to having the early pg feelings and signs and end up with the BFN. It sucks...
I just added in acupuncture to my regimen and it makes me feel a lot better both emotionally and physically. I personally recommend it.
Please know we're here to support you. Big hugs.
TTC#1 since June 2012
Dx: Unexplained Infertility / AMA
BFP after 4th IUI cycle with Gonal F + Ovidrel on March 2014 | EDD 12/7/14 | MMC on 4/14/14
IUI#5 with Gonal F and Ovidrel trigger on 6/6 - BFN
On to IVF #1 with a new RE. Started Gonal F and Menopur on 8/15. Added Ganirelix on 8/24. Trigger on 8/26 for ER on 8/28. 8R 7M 3F. Transferred all 3 on 8/31. BFP on 9/11 | EDD 5/20/15 - Beta #1: 56.7. Beta #2: 97. Beta #3: 1148. Beta #4: 3559. Beta #4: 7678. MMC confirmed on 10/13. D&C on 10/14 at 9w. Confirmed male with Trisomy 14.
On to IVF #2 in March. CCS Testing on 2 embies. No go. Waiting to start IVF #3 in July. Surprise BFP on 6/14! EDD - 2/20/16 - Beta #1: 121.4. Beta #2: 236.4. Beta #3: 2014.
I think everyone has given you good advice.
I'm doing acupuncture as well, but I'm not doing anything special in regard to drinking, etc. I tried cutting back dramatically (and doing a whole bunch of other stuff like taking a zillion supplements) for a couple of months, and honestly I think it just made the BFNs feel worse. I'm trying to just get on with my life while I TTC and hope that reduces my stress.
Good luck to you!
ETA: enjoy your wine!
Me: 41, DH: 45
DD, 6/15/2013
TTC #2 beginning January 2014
AMH 1.05; FSH range 7-11
July 2014: IUI #1. Follistim + Pregnyl. 2 follicles--BFN
September 2014: IUI #2. Follistim + Pregnyl + Ganirelix + Crinone. 4(?) follicles--BFN
October 2014: IUI #3. More Follistim + More Ganirelix + Pregnyl + Crinone. 4 follicles--BFP! Beta #1=10 Beta #2=33 Beta #3=97 Beta #4=158. M/C 11/1/14
December 2014: IVF #1. Microdose Lupron protocol. 9R, 9M, 9F. 3 5-day blasts transferred 12/15. BFFN.
August 2015: IVF #3. 14R, 13M, 11F. Froze 5 blasts for CCS testing. 3 normals. FET planned for 10/2015.
My Ovulation Chart
My BLOG: www.ivfbabyquest.wordpress.com -Update - old blog.
PAIF/SAIF Welcome!
Me: 42, Hubby: 35, TTC since Jan 2010. Dx: DOR due to advanced maternal age. Also: Hypothyroidism (100mcg Levothyroxin). Positive for MTHFR (hetero-C677T), Factor V Leiden, and Fragile X (on DH side). Taking pre-natal vitamins.
First natural PG 9/27/11; mc: 1/20/12
First RE visit: 8/8/12, Saline Sonogram: 8/28/12, IVF injection class: 10/11/12, add FaBB Tab for FVL, +Vitamin D.
IVF #1: 10/17/12 Baseline: FSH- 9.4, E2- 24, LH- 3.7, Prog- 0.3 The u/s showed 6 follicles in my right & 9 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ nightly. 10/21/12: Add Ganirelix SQ every morning.
ER 10/28/12: 13 Retreived. 7 Mature. 6 Fertilized. 5 Made it to PGS. ET 11/2/12: CANCELED. All 5 came back from PGS as having "severe abnormalities."
IVF #2: 1/7/13 Baseline: FSH- 8.8, 4 follicles in my right & 6 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ nightly. 1/11/13: Add Ganirelix SQ every morning. hCG Trigger 1/16/13
ER 1/18/13: 9 Retrieved. 5 Mature. 5 Fertilized. 2 Made it to PGS. ET 1/23/13: CANCELED. All embryos (he even sent the ones not growing) came back from PGS as having "multiple severe abnormalities."
IVF #3: NEW RE! 3/1/13 Baseline: FSH- 9.6, E2- 61, Prog- 0.94, 3 follicles in my right & 4 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle& 150 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/7/13: Add Ganirelix SQ in AM. hCG Trigger 3/9/13 SQ.
ER 3/11/13: 6R, 2M, 2F. Day 3: one 8 cell, grade 0. Five day ET 3/16/13: one early blast, grade Fair. 3/24/13 AF came a day before beta. BFN
IVF #4: (Added acupuncture to this cycle.) 3/25/13 WTF & Baseline: FSH-11.8, E2- 56, Prog- 0.84 3/26/13 Start stims. 3/30/13 u/s: 5 follicles in my right & 4 in my left. Rx: 225 Bravelle& 225 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/31/13 Add Ganirelix SQ in AM.hCG Trigger 4/3/13 SQ.
ER 4/5/13: 5R, 3M, 3F naturally. Day 3: two 8 cell, grade 0, one 8 cell, grade 2 (Scale 0-best to 3-worst). Five day ET 4/10/13: two blastocysts (the 3rd stopped growing.) Beta 4/18/13: 2.5 BFFN. RE recommends we stop trying and focus on living childless, due to the extremely poor quality of my eggs.
***Decided to stop trying and live CFNBC. I couldn't adjust. So, six months later...
IVF #5: Changed RE. Going to one of the big name clinics now. OWDU: 10/29/13. Update: HORRIBLE experience. Disgusted and distraught at their complete unprofessionalism and how much money and precious time they cost us. Sickening. Have now changed RE again. New Patient appt. 1/30/14.
BFP! Out of nowhere, I got KU the old fashioned way! POAS 1/26/14 - Positive! FDLM 12/30/13. Beta #1 16dpo= 373. Beta #2 18dpo= 801. EDD 10/6/14
2/4/14 1st U/S revealed a 5wk2day sac but no fetal pole. Started 200mgs of progesterone suppositories daily
2/11/14 2nd U/S revealed a perfect 6wk1day "diamond ring" embryo with a beating heart! 138bpm! Add 1mg folic acid and 40mg Lovenox
2/25/14 3rd U/S: perfect 8w1d embryo, 178bpm. 3/6 start spotting. 3/11 10w1d U/S shows no heartbeat. Scheduling D&C. The Stork has forsaken me again.
IVF #5.2: New in-state RE. Supplement priming for 1.5 cycles prior to start of cycle, including DHEA 50mg (stopped 5/15), CoQ10 200mg 2x/day, L-Arginine- 1000mg 2x/day (stopped 6/5 due to cold sore!), myo-inositol- 2g 2x/day, melatonin- 3mg, and Neevo (prenatal for MTHFR).
5/16/14 Day 2 bw cycle prior: FSH- 12.22, E2- 38.37, Prog- 1.35, LH- 9.46. 6/2/14 Day 19 bw: Prog- 23
6/12/14 Baseline: E2- 122.7, Prog- 0.4. 5 follicles in left, 4 follicles in right. Start stims: 375IU Follistim & 150IU Menopur. 6/19 Increase Follistim to 425IU, Menopur still 150IU. 6/18 add Ganirelix. 6/23 Ovidrel trigger SQ. 6/25 ER: 8R, 8M, 5F naturally. Start Medrol & Doxy. 6/26 Start Endometrin. 7/2 Start Lovenox.
7/8/14 Beta= 137.4 BFP!!! (My first from IVF!) E2- 1109, Prog- >60. Stop CoQ10, myo-inositol, and melatonin. 7/9 2nd Beta= 281.4. TSH- 2.70. Increasing Synthroid to 100mcg daily. 7/24 6w3d u/s measured 6w3d, hb: 121bmp! 8/5 8w1d u/s measured 8w3d, hb: 164bpm! Graduated from RE to OB. Now I just need to find an OB!
EDD 3/18/15!
My Ovulation Chart
DH: 45
BFP #1 3/19/14 EDD 11/29/14 MMC D&C 4/24/14
BFP #2 12/4/14 Beta #1 218 at 12dpo Beta #2 1055 at 16dpo
Saw heartbeat 12/29. Please be a rainbow.
All welcome
Me:39, DH:40
DD born 8/96, DS born 8/04
TTC#3
NTNP since 2006, active trying 1/13
Natural M/C 3/13 at 7 weeks
CP 2/14
All welcome
TTC #1 with IUI and donor sperm
First IUI May, 2014, Clomid + Trigger = BFN
Second IUI July, 2014, Clomid + Trigger = BFN
Third IUI Dec, 2014, Femara + Follistim + Trigger = BFN
Fourth IUI Feb 2015, Femara + Follistim + Trigger = C/P
"It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness." - Eleanor Roosevelt
Elizabeth 5yrs old Jane 3yrs old