my dog bit my baby.

NotSharknado · June 2014

Kids>>>>>>pets

RondackHiker · June 2014

Having read your update, there is something WRONG with your dog. Okay? It isn't you. You haven't failed. This dog is lunging at family members and that indicates that there's something deep down wrong in this situation. If I had to guess, I'd say the dog is wired wrong and there's just no fixing it.

I would not take on this dog and I've rehabbed many afraid or aggressive dogs. This dog isn't okay.

And you know what? I always assume that a dog acting like this isn't happy or healthy and it's incredibly unkind to keep him alive.

Call your vet. Do this today. I am crying for you, really. I have had to decide this in the past and all the memories are coming back, but you need to do this today for your sake and the dog's sake.

NotSharknado · June 2014

I don't think inquiring about the dog breed is off base. I was wondering too.

EVA116 · June 2014

I am just so sorry. I agree with getting the dog out of the home.

All of this just breaks my heart. Your poor baby. Your poor dog. And then you have to make such a hard decision.

RondackHiker · June 2014

HilarityEnsued said:

uconnhuskie007 said:

HilarityEnsued said:

What kind of dog is it? I missed that part.

I don't know why the dog breed is relevant

I don't know why you chose to offer this irrelevant remark.

I think it's somewhat relevant to ask breed.

Some dogs are bigger and stronger. I'd worry some big labs could go through a door to attack. Some dogs are more prone to 'snapping'. Some dogs are more prone to cancer or seizures that can trigger this. It's not a bad question to ask, but in this case I'd say it does not matter so much because this dog should be put down for his own sake and for the safety of all people, so breed isn't that important.

Plus breed could 'out' the poster, though I don't think she should be ashamed for struggling through this and wanting opinions before deciding.

Hootie&theBlowjob · June 2014

not that this matters now but my H just told me he provoked the dog when he tried to bite him. The only time I saw it myself was when I was pregnant and my dog was laying with me, H starts tickling me, I yell "stop", "no", dog tries to get him. It doesn't change anything except maybe he can be re-homed instead of put down. I am thinking he needs to be evaluated.

RondackHiker · June 2014

Hootie&theBlowjob said:

not that this matters now but my H just told me he provoked the dog when he tried to bite him. The only time I saw it myself was when I was pregnant and my dog was laying with me, H starts tickling me, I yell "stop", "no", dog tries to get him. It doesn't change anything except maybe he can be re-homed instead of put down. I am thinking he needs to be evaluated.I

Stuck in the box... I don't count tickling and you yelling 'stop' as provocation. You just said "the only time I saw it"... does that mean he's lunged more than once? Even provoked, lunging toward a family member is pretty extreme.

And really? The baby incident alone would make me euthanize. And you just said he ran at you. He's telling you who he is. He's telling you what he goes to when he's stressed or upset. He's telling you all this and you should listen and you shouldn't give a dog that defaults that way to another person. He's not a safe dog.

And here's me being brutally honest again. Lets say you DID create this dog. Pretend there's nothing wrong with the dog and you 'made' him this way by ignoring his fear of children and ignoring the red flag of protecting you and your DH baiting him to lunge. Pretend that those reasons alone are the cause of the dog lunging across the room to attack a baby.

Really? It doesn't matter. This dog is six and has had six years of the training that's produced him (again, assuming there's nothing wrong and I'm betting there is). I STILL think he should be euthanized. Is it fair that sometimes animals pay the price for the training they're given (again, assuming nothing is wrong with him). Nope. Sucks for the dog fighting dogs and the the dogs trained to defend homes by drug dealers and the dogs whose owners think the nipping puppy is cute till it grows up. It sucks for them all. But an unsafe dog is an incredibly dangerous thing. It can kill or permanently disfigure a person. One escape or one slip up can result in death. This dog does not sound like a rehab candidate.

Rehoming a dog with an unprovoked bite is wrong. It's foolish from a liability standpoint both for you and the new owner. It's unfair to the dog and the new owner's family and neighbors who didn't get a say. You know this dog bites unprovoked.

There's only one solution here.

RondackHiker · June 2014

IamInigoMontoya said:

I agree 100% agree that the dog needs to be out of your house ASAP. But as far as euthanasia, I would let a professional determine that. True the dog has shown aggression to adults as well but this could possibly be addressed through training. Possibly not but an experienced trainer should be able to determine this. Unfortunately though as others have mentioned, once a dog has a history of biting, very few reputable vets or rescues will assume the liability of rehoming and will likely recommend euthanasia. And I agree that breed is relevant in so much as a larger, more powerful breed is capable of doing a lot more damage even to an adult.

In many states, OP will be liable when the dog bites in the future.

NotSharknado · June 2014

uconnhuskie007 said:

NotSharknado said:

I don't think inquiring about the dog breed is off base. I was wondering too.

My point is, given alllllll the facts here, would it change your opinion if she said beagle vs pitbull? For the sake of this situation, it really doesn't matter.

But you're just assuming this would turn into a breed shaming thing. I think you've been around long enough to know that any type of shaming doesn't go down here. It was an honest question that undeservedly got snark.

MAdams728 · June 2014

Hootie&theBlowjob said:

MAdams728 said:

I used to work in rescue, extensively. Under no circumstances would we have EVER adopted out a dog with a known bite history. It's irresponsible, and a huge liability.

I love dogs. I think they all have value and deserve a good life. I think that many behavior cases can be trained, managed and work out well for all of the involved parties. That said, a dog that bites a baby has no place in this world. Euthanasia would be the only responsible option, from my perspective.

What is done with a bite history dog? @MAdams728 Just preparing myself for the dog to die.

@Hootie&theBlowjob, we humanely euthanized them, by injection.

Based on the info given, I think euthanasia is the responsible option. Please have it done at your vet. Some people would rather drop the dog off at a shelter because it's easier for them, but it's harder on the dog. A hamburger at the drive through and a trip to the vet with his people is much better than being dropped off at a strange, stressful place.

I wish you luck, and peace with whatever decision you make.

RondackHiker · June 2014

OP, if you'd like, PM me and we can talk more privately if you need to just bounce ideas for a bit.

RondackHiker · June 2014

Also, by assuming that this would turn into a breed shaming thing you're assuming that the dog is a breed that would be 'shamed', rather than a 'nice' breed like a lab or golden.

amaseya · June 2014

LoisLayn23 said:
He's shown aggression to both children and adults, unprovoked. The dog needs to be euthanized.

I've done rescue as well, and have had to mKe this decision twice, both for mentally unstable dogs after exhausting all of the training methods we could find. It never gets easier, but sometimes it's in the best interest of the dog not to have to live with all that anxiety and fear.

Hootie&theBlowjob · June 2014

CTGirl30 said:

Fellow dog lover & owner here but I'm just going to defer to what @RondackHiker has stated on this. My dog isn't the biggest fan of kids, either, but she generally gets up and leaves the room / area if she feels bothered by them and we do everything in our power to prevent the kids from harassing her or touching her if she is showing signs she prefers to be left alone. She is very strongly bonded to me and my H. She's kind of aloof with the kids. But....never has she lunged at anyone in our household or barked or growled at any of us. If I felt my children were at risk, I truly ache in my heart to say this, but I think I would need to find another arrangement so that I wouldn't be worrying for my babies. And I say that with all the love in my heart for my pet.

I'm so sorry, OP.

That is how he has always been...if the baby crawls towards him, he will move across the room. He is not a bad dog but I have been colored up until now because I'm all he's ever known and I got him during a very dark time in my life. Not trying to make excuses, really just rambling all the thoughts in my head.

RondackHiker · June 2014

For the record, I don't think you're making excuses. This is never an easy decision. This is your dog. You love him. He just did something so unimaginable that it was a shock and you're still recovering from the horror and trying to process.

Look at your dog. Do you think a happy and healthy dog would do what he did? I've found it's sometimes easier to take steps when I focus on what's best for the dog rather than feeling like I'm "doing something" to the dog or "being mean" or "unfair".

You love your dog. That's really clear. You also came here for advice when you KNEW what that advice would be. So it's also really clear that you know things need to change so you can protect your child.

You're listening and thinking and processing a horror while struggling with the love of your dog. It's not an easy position to be in and I wish I could hug you.

He isn't a bad dog. To me, he sounds like a sick dog.

studyinpink · June 2014

I'm sorry you are going through this.

Hootie&theBlowjob · June 2014

Thank you for all you support. I feel like you are the rational part of my mind and that you really get it. My H had admitted he lunged at him before but was provoked by "playing". I wasn't there. The only time I saw him lunge at my H was the pregnancy time. Still, he bit my baby. Like, that's my baby. This is why I used an AE because I feel guilty for even caring about my dog anymore, but I digress.

I know I need to bring him to the vet. My H wants it done today and that is probably the best decision.

@rondackhiker thank you for caring so much, understanding and offering me further support.

RondackHiker · June 2014

Hootie&theBlowjob said:

Thank you for all you support. I feel like you are the rational part of my mind and that you really get it. My H had admitted he lunged at him before but was provoked by "playing". I wasn't there. The only time I saw him lunge at my H was the pregnancy time. Still, he bit my baby. Like, that's my baby. This is why I used an AE because I feel guilty for even caring about my dog anymore, but I digress.

I know I need to bring him to the vet. My H wants it done today and that is probably the best decision.

@rondackhiker thank you for caring so much, understanding and offering me further support.

My heart is breaking for you right now.

Of course you still care about your dog. You've got YEARS of love and this one incident. Yes, it's bad. Yes, there were other small things.

But still, you love your dog very much and suddenly one day you're supposed to stop? It doesn't work that way. You're probably a bit mad at him and a bit scared of him and a bit hurt that he'd do this... but you still love him. It is more than okay to still love him.

Just remember that this is best for him as well. He doesn't know what will happen. He won't be afraid. Some vets will come to your house, you can consider that, or ask to do it outside if you prefer. Huge hugs to you. I'm so sad that you are all dealing with this.

JGY · June 2014

I really wish I didn't feel compelled to come out of lurkerdome to comment, but I do. I want to offer my experience, but not my advice:

We have an aggressive dog. He is large, and a breed that many find intimidating. He has medical issues. He bit an adult, once, provoked. He has never, EVER, shown one ounce of aggression, fear, or discomfort around our child. He actively seeks out our child to play. He shows our child affection constantly. But that doesn't help us to be any more relaxed about having them in the same space. We are absolutely vigilant in constantly evaluating our dog's body language for signs of stress. We NEVER leave the dog and the baby alone together. We carefully monitor and limit how they interact and play.

It's exhausting. Truly exhausting. And it's daunting to think about the future and having our child's friends in and out of our home and the amount of diligence it will require to make sure that the environment is always safe for everyone. I recognize that you and I are not in the same situation at all. But I wanted to say that given the amount of effort we put forth on a daily basis, I cannot even imagine the stress or work involved if our dog had shown aggression towards a family member, rather than a stranger. (And I readily admit that our decision to keep this dog may have been different in a difference scenario)

I am so SO sorry that you have to go through this. I can sympathize and I send you lots of internet hugs. Whatever you decide to do, I hope that you can find some peace. Good luck!

**ETA to state that the dog I refer to is not the one in my avatar pic**

jorkz821 · June 2014

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this, OP. Agree with others that I'd put him down in your situation.

Speshul · June 2014

I didn't read through the comments but I think it's important to investigate the nature of the aggression. I think you should talk to a behaviorist to determine what circumstances caused this.

We had incidents in the family with MIL's dog. Both times were "warning bites" not full on attacks because the dog did not like the child's behavior.

The dog has resource guarding issues and can also be aggressive when startled. It keeps "resource guarding" my MIL lol. Since your dog is blind in one eye and is older she may get startled easily. My MIL prevents her from sleeping on the floor while my LO is playing, and the room has a gate so she can keep her out of there if necessary. If LO is sneaking up on the dog she calls the dogs name to alert her. Also, she(we are as well) is slowly teaching LO how to be nice to animals. It requires a lot of work, but you can "manage" the dog if it's just a matter of avoiding a certain set of circumstances. If you choose to keep them separated, it doesn't have to be all the time.

Only you and the behaviorist can determine the nature of the aggression. My friend had to get rid of a dog because she was attacking another if it was even in the room, the behavior started small and escalated over time. It's a hard decision and I'm sorry you have to deal with it.

RayRay007 · June 2014

I'm really sorry you're going through this. It must have been scary and puts you in a really hard place. I am not automatically team rehome or euthanize.

Did you see what prompted it? I'm not saying that the dog was justified and it's ok to keep him around your kid; I'm just curious. I have a chihuahua who has gnarled and nipped at DD now that she's older and tormenting him. I of course try to teach her not to do that and intervene, but sometimes I can't stop her and she pulls his hair or whatever and he nips. It scares her, but no damage, and I can't blame him for that. He's generally pretty good around kids in that he knows he doesn't like them in his face so he leaves. I never left her alone around him when she was smaller, and when we have other kids over who don't know him, we usually send him away (like to ILs when it was DDs bday party).

I think I would have a hard time trusting your dog again. When I was a kid I was just petting a dog (German Sheppard) when he suddenly bit me in the face. That dog got a beating from its owner and then, whenever we walked past that house again, the previously sweet loveable dog was always snarling and barking at us. It was like something snapped in that dog.

Would it help to talk to a vet or behaviourist or trainer and get an opinion?

I see this thread is 5 pages long and I haven't read it, so I may be out to lunch here.

jesuisfatiguee · June 2014

I'm sorry, OP

I hope you are able to soon find peace with what needs to be done.

Xtine22 · June 2014

I just wanted to say I am so sorry, I am sitting here crying for you having to go through this.

Hootie&theBlowjob · June 2014

I am waiting for the vet to call me back but they are going to recommend the dog see their on-site behaviorist. We are doing everything we can to not euthanize. This is not something I want to see happen.

ByeBabyBunting · June 2014

I'm late to this party and I haven't read all the comments, but I wanted to share.

We have a jack russell who we took in before we had LO. She was abused and at first tried to bite both me and DH several times. After lots of hard work she is greatly rehabilitated, however we knew we couldn't trust her alone with LO when he was small. We crate trained her before LO arrived and we gated too. She had full run of half of the house and LO had the other half. We also have a fenced in yard and she gets lots of time out there. When we first introduce them we leashed her and made sure we had full control of her at all times. We leashed her next to us on the couch so we could have family time together. Now she's super attached to LO. He feeds her every day and she is super protective and loving with him. She puts up with treatment from him that she would never take for anyone else. We still crate her when we have other kids over, but now that LO is almost 4 we don't worry about leaving them alone in a room together for short stints.

I think my point after that TL;DR is that re-homing is permanent, but dogs can change and be controlled. And having your LO learn how to respect animals and their space from an early age is going to be great when you meet other dogs out in the world. I think putting in the work to make it work is being a responsible parent and a responsible dog owner.

fintin · June 2014

If the dog has never bit and all of a sudden bites but not hard. Whats stopping the dog from next time really hurting your kid? This is a no brainer. Thats a dog who hurt your kid! Get rid of it.

RondackHiker · June 2014

Let us know how it goes, okay?

Hootie&theBlowjob said:

I am waiting for the vet to call me back but they are going to recommend the dog see their on-site behaviorist. We are doing everything we can to not euthanize. This is not something I want to see happen.

LnR70707 · June 2014

I am sorry you are going through this. I think others have already covered a lot of my feelings about a situation like this. Our dog is almost 10, and my H and I agree that if he ever attacked one of our children he would be euthanized. Now, our dog has shown zero aggression in the past, so we'd definitely seek out our vet first, but standing on top of my child? No way would I consider that a re-home possibility.

meggyski · June 2014

So sorry to hear about this. I think PPs have offered great advice, and I think you are correct to have your dog evaluated by a behaviorist before you make any final decisions. They will be able to tell you if the dog is a future bite risk and whether he should be put down.

One other thing that may not have been mentioned- I'd also also have your vet do a thorough health evaluation to make sure there are no overlooked health conditions which may be making him act out. I know a family who had a beloved and normally gentle golden retriever that bit their young child. They put the dog down, only to discover after the fact that he had a bad ear infection that the owners had missed. I think it would be worth the peace of mind to eliminate any possibility of something like that happening.

If there are no health issues and the behaviorist advises you that the dog is a bite risk, then you can have peace of mind that euthanization is the best decision for your family and also for the dog.

SandyClam · June 2014

Hootie&theBlowjob said:

I am waiting for the vet to call me back but they are going to recommend the dog see their on-site behaviorist. We are doing everything we can to not euthanize. This is not something I want to see happen.

You're doing the right thing. I'm sorry that your husband made you make the final call. What breed/size is your dog? I feel like I have to know since someone asked and it's gone unanswered. I don't want it to be a mystery like the condoms in the nightstand.

Maebb · June 2014

I'm sorry for what you are going through. This whole situation would be really tough.

KTdidit · June 2014

I'm so sorry you have to go through this and make that decision. I have pets too but if they attacked my boys they'd be gone, with a lot of tears. I'm very glad that your LO is ok though. (( hugs ))

wino2006 · June 2014

Team euthanize. Sorry it's a tough decision. We had a chocolate lab growing up that would go after the neighbor kids unprovoked and we had to put her down because of it. It was only a matter of time before she hurt someone.

Hootie&theBlowjob · June 2014

Okay, everybody. I had a long day. I didn't get much accomplished but the vet finally called back and spoke with me for a while. She is strongly recommending a health visit. She said a behaviorist would need this to do the test but she also said the vet will be very honest with me and give me his opinion. The vet is also a father so that helps. Baby had to be brought back to the pediatrician for slight puss, redness and swelling and a low-grade fever. He is still OK but we are on guard. Back to the dog...the behaviorist is SUPER booked and I will ask again about an emergency appointment tomorrow but the soonest appointment was 1 month. That is too long. We also contacted NUMEROUS shelters but most are booked or will not take with a bite history. My H is not very happy about bringing the dog to the vet but I cannot proceed without a professional opinion. I asked the vet on the phone about euthanasia and she was very upfront and said the options are limited with a bite history.

RondackHiker · June 2014

Huge hugs. I'm so sorry this is happening. I hope you see the behaviorist soon.

fancynewbeesly · June 2014

*huge hugs* I am so sorry OP. This is heartbreaking

Hootie&theBlowjob · June 2014

CrazyCornball said:

I think a month is absolutely way too long to wait with the dog in the house.

Exactly. I'm going to ask again tomorrow. I think this qualifies as an emergency situation.

RondackHiker · June 2014

Hootie&theBlowjob said:

CrazyCornball said:

I think a month is absolutely way too long to wait with the dog in the house.

Exactly. I'm going to ask again tomorrow. I think this qualifies as an emergency situation.

I should certainly hope so!
Good luck and keep us updated.

jorkz821 · June 2014

Thinking of you! Hope LO is ok and you can come up with a plan soon.

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