FFFC

ProcessofBecoming · May 2014

lisaren said:

I am just going to leave this gem right here

What is this? Jaws?

This is the episode of "Happy Days" where Fonzie infamously "jumps the shark" (thus spawning the phrase "jumping the shark").

I'm old enough to have had a major crush on Fonzie (and John Boy Walton, and Shaun Cassidy) back in the day, so I remember this episode.

FirstBabyDoyle · May 2014

Ehrmagad. IF I AM GOING OUT IT IS GOING TO BE LIKE THIS.....

grace helbig eat a dick birthday extravaganza gif

giffitygifgif.

absolutelymaybe · May 2014

FYI eating Dick's can be pretty freaking tasty.

eta - i think we should all eat more Dick's.

Kristy774 · May 2014

Kllopez1221 said:

FirstBabyDoyle said:
Ehrmagad. IF I AM GOING OUT IT IS GOING TO BE LIKE THIS.....

giffitygifgif.

If there ever was a more perfect gif
for this thread I don't think we could find it =D>

I finally laughed at something on this thread!!!! Yesss!!!!

I can't eat dick because DH is traveling

all of you other girls can go enjoy it and tell me all about it!!!

cindyNmark2010 · May 2014

Pshaw!!!! Well if y'all are going there...

mommymeg143 · May 2014

FirstBabyDoyle said:
Ehrmagad. IF I AM GOING OUT IT IS GOING TO BE LIKE THIS.....

giffitygifgif.

You win the internet!! =D>

)

jlove253 · May 2014

absolutelymaybe said:
FYI eating Dick's can be pretty freaking tasty.

eta - i think we should all eat more Dick's.

Yeah Seattle!

BlackBooks · May 2014

I know my comment about Lisa taking a break seemed to come out of left field. However, I think her posts on the name thread in combination with her post on her feelings on here is extraordinarily passive aggressive. In fact, that behavior seemed so bitchy that I thought it was really out of character for her. These comments doesn't seem to be coming from a good place so I don't think suggesting taking a step back is out of line. Obviously, Lisa is entitled to express her own feelings and her posting is her own prerogative.

Let me also say that the chorus of people saying the name thread was tacky or ill-timed was unnecessary. The girl seemed to have no idea what was really going on and to come back here and talk about her behind her back seems wrong to me. I don't think it is okay and it isn't the tone I would like to see for the board. I feel comfortable saying that, @nfranco973, because I have been an active member here since late February.

lizzielu82 · May 2014

Wow I missed a lot today!

My confession - I really really need a big glass of red wine after reading this whole thing (and always more cake of course).

Nfranco973 · May 2014

TeeJ526 said:

Nfranco973 said:

TeeJ526 said:

Nfranco973 said:

TeeJ526 said:

Nfranco973 said:

Is it me or have all the Lurkers come out of hiding all of a sudden, all at the same time?! I'm just saying...

Who's lurking?
Didn't think it needed an explanation

/:)
Yeah, kind of does. PPs look familiar to me.
Who's talking about PP on this?
It was a general comment. Everyone looked past it but you didn't. Hmmm.
:P at least have a clue.

What in the...? Yeah, ok. Trust me, no one looked past your ridiculous comment.

Edit to add an emoticon since that's how you communicate best.

)

Hop off & carry on!

Maelara · May 2014

BlackBooks said:
I know my comment about Lisa taking a break seemed to come out of left field. However, I think her posts on the name thread in combination with her post on her feelings on here is extraordinarily passive aggressive. In fact, that behavior seemed so bitchy that I thought it was really out of character for her. These comments doesn't seem to be coming from a good place so I don't think suggesting taking a step back is out of line. Obviously, Lisa is entitled to express her own feelings and her posting is her own prerogative.

Let me also say that the chorus of people saying the name thread was tacky or ill-timed was unnecessary. The girl seemed to have no idea what was really going on and to come back here and talk about her behind her back seems wrong to me. I don't think it is okay and it isn't the tone I would like to see for the board. I feel comfortable saying that, @nfranco973, because I have been an active member here since late February.

Has anyone checked that OPs posting history? Because I have and she has been around long enough and posted enough to know what's going on.

She seems nice enough and I honest to god don't think she did it maliciously, I really don't. We all have things we are sensitive about and this is @lisaren's. Mine is the BF vs FF mommy wars. I think we need to just leave this alone now.

lisaren · May 2014

BlackBooks said:
I know my comment about Lisa taking a break seemed to come out of left field. However, I think her posts on the name thread in combination with her post on her feelings on here is extraordinarily passive aggressive. In fact, that behavior seemed so bitchy that I thought it was really out of character for her. These comments doesn't seem to be coming from a good place so I don't think suggesting taking a step back is out of line. Obviously, Lisa is entitled to express her own feelings and her posting is her own prerogative.

Let me also say that the chorus of people saying the name thread was tacky or ill-timed was unnecessary. The girl seemed to have no idea what was really going on and to come back here and talk about her behind her back seems wrong to me. I don't think it is okay and it isn't the tone I would like to see for the board. I feel comfortable saying that, @nfranco973, because I have been an active member here since late February.

I was not talking negatively about the OP, more about the topic, and while I should have stayed quiet I have since apologized in this thread three times.
I was simply stating an opinion.

I'm confused as to why anyone thinks that the tone of the board is unhealthy?? Have you looked around?

We have a pretty awesome board!
I did not ask anyone to say anything. I did not cheer anyone on. I hold myself to the same standard as I hold you too. In general you.

Anyways, I respect and appreciate each of you. I do look forward to seeing these beautiful babies being AW here in October/November.

Maelara · May 2014

lisaren said:

BlackBooks said:
I know my comment about Lisa taking a break seemed to come out of left field. However, I think her posts on the name thread in combination with her post on her feelings on here is extraordinarily passive aggressive. In fact, that behavior seemed so bitchy that I thought it was really out of character for her. These comments doesn't seem to be coming from a good place so I don't think suggesting taking a step back is out of line. Obviously, Lisa is entitled to express her own feelings and her posting is her own prerogative.

Let me also say that the chorus of people saying the name thread was tacky or ill-timed was unnecessary. The girl seemed to have no idea what was really going on and to come back here and talk about her behind her back seems wrong to me. I don't think it is okay and it isn't the tone I would like to see for the board. I feel comfortable saying that, @nfranco973, because I have been an active member here since late February.

I was not talking negatively about the OP, more about the topic, and while I should have stayed quiet I have since apologized in this thread three times.
I was simply stating an opinion.

I'm confused as to why anyone thinks that the tone of the board is unhealthy?? Have you looked around?

We have a pretty awesome board!
I did not ask anyone to say anything. I did not cheer anyone on. I hold myself to the same standard as I hold you too. In general you.

Anyways, I respect and appreciate each of you. I do look forward to seeing these beautiful babies being AW here in October/November.

It's true, @lisaren actually asked me NOT to comment to you earlier. I think we all just want this done!

wallygirl · May 2014

Wow I haven't been on since yesterday afternoon/evening. I have no words...

Nfranco973 · May 2014

BlackBooks said:
I know my comment about Lisa taking a break seemed to come out of left field. However, I think her posts on the name thread in combination with her post on her feelings on here is extraordinarily passive aggressive. In fact, that behavior seemed so bitchy that I thought it was really out of character for her. These comments doesn't seem to be coming from a good place so I don't think suggesting taking a step back is out of line. Obviously, Lisa is entitled to express her own feelings and her posting is her own prerogative.

Let me also say that the chorus of people saying the name thread was tacky or ill-timed was unnecessary. The girl seemed to have no idea what was really going on and to come back here and talk about her behind her back seems wrong to me. I don't think it is okay and it isn't the tone I would like to see for the board. I feel comfortable saying that, @nfranco973, because I have been an active member here since late February.

Okay, I must of missed something. I wasn't the only one to think it was tacky. I also like Maelara mentioned, checked the OP's history and it seems she's not fairly new to this either. Whether it was a coincidence or not, hopefully not, I don't know. It was my personal opinion and everybody has one. I didn't bash the girl, I just said I feel Lisaren because when I consider people's feelings I look at if it was me in the situation. I understood where she was coming from. If it were you I would of felt the same. I'm still wondering why you tagged me & then mentioned you have been on the board since February. Frankly, I could give a shit because opinions are like assholes and everyone has one. Even if you have been on since yesterday, should your opinion not count? It's your's own it.

mamatohne · May 2014

Fwiw I'd like go add my opinion on this whole topic.
1st of all I think we are all in agreement op did not intend to offend anyone. This falls in to the same category as new posters coming in without lurking for 1 second and posting which has been 99% of the issue on this board. Ftr I do think some of the people who commented on the thread had some other intentions by saying they don't care for the name but that's my opinion.
2nd everyone has the right to their opinion on the board, Telling someone to go somewhere else because you don't like the opinion they have is complete bull shit!
3rd I don't think the women here kiss anyone's ass. I think (most of) the women here have compassion. When I saw the thread I though "ooh ouch" and as I read this threas I realized I was not alone. Was it intentional probably not did @lisaren say it was NO! Should she be flamed and told to go somewhere else, absolutely not.

Hopefully my point makes sense and wasn't too redundant.

Eta I also think @‌she handled this appropriately by not bombing the op's thread!

BlackBooks · May 2014

This is why I tagged you

Nfranco973 said:

Is it me or have all the Lurkers come out of hiding all of a sudden, all at the same time?! I'm just saying...

renbee · May 2014

I just have to say that absolutely no one told her to go somewhere else. @BlackBooks‌ suggested that she take a bump break, and she even said she was suggesting it out of love. I think many are twisting her words. Like others have said, a bump break is not permanent - I took a short one immediately after my loss, and I still don't post as much as I used to. It has helped me keep my sanity while still hanging with all of you, bc I would miss it if I went away completely!

All that being said, I know @lisaren will do what she feels is best, and will grieve in her own way. Everyone is different.

Nfranco973 · May 2014

Sweetie, that comment wasn't intended for this thread or that thread either. I actually noticed that there were posters that I had not seen post before posting today. That's whAt I meant. It wasn't meant to offend anyone it was just an observation. The only comment I made towArds that particular thread was that I agree with Lisaren on her thoughts. That was all. I thought it was the wrong timing that's all but like PP mentioned a lot of Lurkers tend to post without reading so that or may not have been the case. Notice that I told a PP that commented on that post that it didn't need an explanation. It was a thought. She got her panties all in a bunch about it.

Kristy774 · May 2014

I can't wait for this thread to die.

Nfranco973 · May 2014

I'm sorry but this thread makes me feel like this. Had to bring some laughs to lighten things up a bit.

Maelara · May 2014

Aaren91011 said:

I just have to say that absolutely no one told her to go somewhere else. @BlackBooks‌ suggested that she take a bump break, and she even said she was suggesting it out of love. I think many are twisting her words. Like others have said, a bump break is not permanent - I took a short one immediately after my loss, and I still don't post as much as I used to. It has helped me keep my sanity while still hanging with all of you, bc I would miss it if I went away completely! All that being said, I know @lisaren will do what she feels is best, and will grieve in her own way. Everyone is different.

Someone did tell @lisaren she should of gone to the loss board but I don't think if was @blackbooks. After her initial comment, I believe she probably got busy with life and came back later. Blackbooks suggested a hiatus.

mamatohne · May 2014

^ I was trying to find this!

mommymeg143 · May 2014

Kristy774 said:
I can't wait for this thread to die.

I'm just waiting for 12 o'clock when the FFFC is not relevant anymore. Hopefully this thread will die with Friday...

Kristy774 · May 2014

MeganMullikin said:

Kristy774 said:
I can't wait for this thread to die.
I'm just waiting for 12 o'clock when the FFFC is not relevant anymore. Hopefully this thread will die with Friday...

We can only hope.

renbee · May 2014

Maelara said:

Aaren91011 said:

I just have to say that absolutely no one told her to go somewhere else. @BlackBooks‌ suggested that she take a bump break, and she even said she was suggesting it out of love. I think many are twisting her words. Like others have said, a bump break is not permanent - I took a short one immediately after my loss, and I still don't post as much as I used to. It has helped me keep my sanity while still hanging with all of you, bc I would miss it if I went away completely!

All that being said, I know @lisaren will do what she feels is best, and will grieve in her own way. Everyone is different.

Someone did tell @lisaren she should of gone to the loss board but I don't think if was @blackbooks. After her initial comment, I believe she probably got busy with life and came back later. Blackbooks suggested a hiatus.

----quotes suck------

I remember the loss boards being mentioned, but I think it was only to say that this isn't a loss board so things here might inadvertently hurt loss mamas. I never saw anyone tell her to not post here and instead post on the loss boards.

Sorry to continue this drama, it's just one of my bump pet peeves when people twist others words or go BSC over things that were actually never said in a thread.

brooklyngirl18 · May 2014

MeganMullikin said:

I can't wait for this thread to die.
I'm just waiting for 12 o'clock when the FFFC is not relevant anymore. Hopefully this thread will die with Friday…

i hope so too but don't hold your breath. i think this one has legs

Maelara · May 2014

Aaren91011 said:

Aaren91011 said:

I just have to say that absolutely no one told her to go somewhere else. @BlackBooks‌ suggested that she take a bump break, and she even said she was suggesting it out of love. I think many are twisting her words. Like others have said, a bump break is not permanent - I took a short one immediately after my loss, and I still don't post as much as I used to. It has helped me keep my sanity while still hanging with all of you, bc I would miss it if I went away completely! All that being said, I know @lisaren will do what she feels is best, and will grieve in her own way. Everyone is different.

Someone did tell @lisaren she should of gone to the loss board but I don't think if was @blackbooks. After her initial comment, I believe she probably got busy with life and came back later. Blackbooks suggested a hiatus.
----quotes suck------ I remember the loss boards being mentioned, but I think it was only to say that this isn't a loss board so things here might inadvertently hurt loss mamas. I never saw anyone tell her to not post here and instead post on the loss boards. Sorry to continue this drama, it's just one of my bump pet peeves when people twist others words or go BSC over things that were actually never said in a thread.

I just went back and reread the posts on this, I wanted to get my facts straight. It wasnt out right said for lisaren to go to the loss board, however, it was VERY blatantly implied and I'm not twisting words saying that. That is also a pet peeve of mine.

sparklingwhit · May 2014

So....I really don't like cake, or cupcakes, or cake pops, or ice cream cake.

Oh and I occasionally crop dust people at work that I don't like and I don't feel guilty at all...

(Changing subject Cuz I like FFFC)

(If I knew how to GIF there would be one of Chandler Bing trying to change the fight topic from Ross and Rachel by doing a silly running dance thing. Phoebe: "LOOK WHAT YOUR DOING TO CHANDLER!!!")

sparklingwhit · May 2014

flutterbuggie said:

Done - one of the best scenes ever!

Edit - add more words and stuff

Thank you for helping me with my inability to GIF! You're my hero!!!

jlove253 · May 2014

@sparklingwhit

ETA: Sorry I was the second person to post this. We're Chandler crazy now!

lisaren · May 2014

I'm not sure it was said to go to another board specifically but it was highly suggested over and over.
And fwiw: I have gone to other boards, did intros and posted but did not feel I needed to announce my every bump move here.
I also see a therapist that specializes in loss. She says I'm doing great, considering.
I've seen my MW twice since losing Brody, which has been only 2 weeks from tomorrow. And again, I'm quite mentally sane:) believe it or not!
Not that I owe any of you an explanation. But ya know since everyone is worried about my mental well being.
My husband and I are closer than ever. We're even talking about when we will ttc again. I've spent amazing QT with my friends and children.
So I appreciate the concern. For reals.
I had one upset. Over my sons name. That's normal! Makes me human! It's completely normal have these feelings and I don't apologize for that. I apologize for saying anything here, that lesson is learned.

I do however find this unsettling:

mrsmechanic1 said:
What I think is distasteful is pulling the Pain Olympics excuse for everything/p>

when she brings it up every two seconds, it makes some of us question whether or not the job of moderator is a good place for her.

-------------------------

mrsmechanic1 said:

Making yourself a martyr on your old BMB isn't going to help with the grieving process.

-----------------

The pain Olympics? What does this mean? Because I lost a child? A child I had to make a horrible choice about? That's the pain Olympics? That's reality folks!

Every 2 seconds???? Really. That's not true. I find this strange that you would even say this, but if you're talking about the thread I started?? I'm sorry if that's offensive. But every 2 seconds???? Come on now! That's a complete fabrication and stretch of truth.

Making myself a martyr?? This is not my old bmb. This is my bmb that I love. I again appreciate you trying to help me with my "grieving" process but I've got this handled. You don't know me. Constantly making low blow jabs like this is just ridiculous. You don't know me further from this board, and if you did you would know I'm not manipulating like this. I would not assume to know you, why do you do this with me?

---------------

I don't pretend to have my shit all together. But friends, I think I'm doing pretty damn good. And for that I'm full of gratitude. I'm excited about the future, I know the universe has a big plans for me. My pm button works great for those who have future concerns about my well being, or my mod capabilities or just to shoot the shit

Kristy774 · May 2014

Maelara said:

Aaren91011 said:

Maelara said:

Aaren91011 said:

I just have to say that absolutely no one told her to go somewhere else. @BlackBooks‌ suggested that she take a bump break, and she even said she was suggesting it out of love. I think many are twisting her words. Like others have said, a bump break is not permanent - I took a short one immediately after my loss, and I still don't post as much as I used to. It has helped me keep my sanity while still hanging with all of you, bc I would miss it if I went away completely!

All that being said, I know @lisaren will do what she feels is best, and will grieve in her own way. Everyone is different.

Someone did tell @lisaren she should of gone to the loss board but I don't think if was @blackbooks. After her initial comment, I believe she probably got busy with life and came back later. Blackbooks suggested a hiatus.
----quotes suck------

I remember the loss boards being mentioned, but I think it was only to say that this isn't a loss board so things here might inadvertently hurt loss mamas. I never saw anyone tell her to not post here and instead post on the loss boards.

Sorry to continue this drama, it's just one of my bump pet peeves when people twist others words or go BSC over things that were actually never said in a thread.

I just went back and reread the posts on this, I wanted to get my facts straight. It wasnt out right said for lisaren to go to the loss board, however, it was VERY blatantly implied and I'm not twisting words saying that. That is also a pet peeve of mine.

I swore I wouldn't comment anymore. I think that if someone really was coming from a loving place, and thought Lisa should take a bump break, they would have PM'd her that and not put it out on the thread. I just don't feel like that particular comment came from a good place or was for the best interest of Lisa, or was necessary at all. I just don't, nothing anyone can say will make me feel differently.

Maelara · May 2014

I agree it should have been said in PM. I've said things to Lisa in PM about her comments before (lovingly of course!) and she received them extremely well.

lisaren · May 2014

@BlackBooks‌ I do understand where your OP was/is coming from. Sorry I forgot to mention that earlier.

mockingjay1 · May 2014

Holy crap I missed a lot today. Before I read this thread my FFFC was going to be that I think there is too many "rainbows and unicorns" on this board. I feel like we had more of a variety of people when the board started, and it seems very lopsided now. Yes, I know I could just not post here, but this is my BMB too and it used to be so fun with the variety of people.

I guess I just feel like I'm walking on eggshells a lot on this board, something I didn't have to worry about on the last board I was on. I'm sure I'll make it on some sticky notes if I haven't already.

ETA: This has nothing to do with @Lisaren or her loss, but just the general tone of the board.

Maelara · May 2014

dmo1371 said:

Holy crap I missed a lot today. Before I read this thread my FFFC was going to be that I think there is too many "rainbows and unicorns" on this board. I feel like we had more of a variety of people when the board started, and it seems very lopsided now. Yes, I know I could just not post here, but this is my BMB too and it used to be so fun with the variety of people.

I guess I just feel like I'm walking on eggshells a lot on this board, something I didn't have to worry about on the last board I was on. I'm sure I'll make it on some sticky notes if I haven't already.

ETA: This has nothing to do with @Lisaren or her loss, but just the general tone of the board.

I feel like I'm walking on egg shells too, but I don't think it's for the same reason (judging by your love tits). My other BMB is nothing like this one either. It's just... Different. We support each other differently. Don't get me wrong, we've had drama. But we are a kittens and rainbow board. That's for sure!

lisaren · May 2014

It is a little glittery lately. But honestly? I think the glitter is gone. Hahahaha.

mommymeg143 · May 2014

I'm so confused as to why people think this board is too fluffy or too many unicorns and rainbows but still feel like they are walking on eggshells. You're not the only one who says it @dmo1371‌, I read it all the time on threads. It's like an oxymoron.

lisaren · May 2014

mrsmechanic1 said:
First off, I never once said she couldn't post here or wasn't a part of this board. I even specifically said to post, love tit, whatever. I did imply that I don't think she should be the Mod anymore due to her potentially being forced to read sensitive threads due to the nature of the job. And yes, after reading her reactions to someone not liking the name she chose for her son, that's totally reasonable. I'm not the only one who feels this way, clearly.

Lisa, I'm still around. I haven't disappeared just because I don't post as much. I see the loss brought up on many threads and in many contexts. Yes, you play pain Olympics. In case you're wondering, that's when you use a loss to compete with someone else, or to make them feel bad for whatever reason, including not being aware of the loss. I've seen that happen at least twice in the past week or two, not including this latest post.

Well I think we can agree to disagree here.
I do appreciate your concern though.

I do hope if anyone ever feels I do this please pm me! I beg you, let me know.

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