Wait -- you're saying that he is being ORDERED to take this soldier to her OB appointments (despite there being a shuttle), but he is not allowed to take you to your appointments? Oh. Hell. No.
Pretty much this.
And if she's married, doesn't she already get BAH benefits?
Speaking from personal experience, If shes married and they are stationed in two different areas they are not automatically eligable recieve BAH. My DH recieved single BAH and I was in the barracks without BAH until I made PO. He was relocated a few months after I made rank. We both get single because mil to mil cannot claim the other as a dependent.
I don't know why he can't talk to his higher-ups. I know everyone of my husband's "bosses" personally and have established a good relationship with them so much that I would go to them myself if I had an issue. He needs to stand up for himself and say something. Yes it's the military where they can make you do a lot, but there are rules.
I find this baffling, if I were in her shoes, I would be asking for the shuttle just so I wouldn't have to put him out. Hardly fair that your DH would have to go to such lengths and yet not have the opportunity to be with you for your own appointments. We are so very fortunate, my dh's WO and CO were so understanding and allowed him time off after our miscarriage. With this high risk pregnancy they allow him to attend every U/S and he stays home with the children (5 that come to my home based child care) all of which are military families. If he didn't come home for 1 hour, I would have to cancel the whole day on them. They are wonderful and very understanding.
I have to admit, I would feel resentment if I were in your situation.
I find this baffling, if I were in her shoes, I would be asking for the shuttle just so I wouldn't have to put him out. Hardly fair that your DH would have to go to such lengths and yet not have the opportunity to be with you for your own appointments. We are so very fortunate, my dh's WO and CO were so understanding and allowed him time off after our miscarriage. With this high risk pregnancy they allow him to attend every U/S and he stays home with the children (5 that come to my home based child care) all of which are military families. If he didn't come home for 1 hour, I would have to cancel the whole day on them. They are wonderful and very understanding.
I have to admit, I would feel resentment if I were in your situation.
This is a past issue and I am surprised it keeps coming up on the forums. Then again, the boards are so dead maybe I shouldn't be surprised?
Are you an FCC provider? If so, it would concern me that your husband is caring for children when you are the provider that is certified. But if its an "under the table" business and the parents are ok with this arrangement then do what you do.
BFP #1 11/07/2012 EDD 07/09/2013 M/C 11/22/2012
BFP #2 02/05/2013 EDD 09/19/2013
Arrived via c-section 09/27/2013
That is definitely a chain of command issue..but a few things in this story aren't adding up to me. I've been in the military for 12 years, just make sure all of the facts are 100% correct.
Re: Should this irritate me?
Pretty much this.
And if she's married, doesn't she already get BAH benefits?
We are so very fortunate, my dh's WO and CO were so understanding and allowed him time off after our miscarriage. With this high risk pregnancy they allow him to attend every U/S and he stays home with the children (5 that come to my home based child care) all of which are military families. If he didn't come home for 1 hour, I would have to cancel the whole day on them.
They are wonderful and very understanding.
I have to admit, I would feel resentment if I were in your situation.
This is a past issue and I am surprised it keeps coming up on the forums. Then again, the boards are so dead maybe I shouldn't be surprised?
Are you an FCC provider? If so, it would concern me that your husband is caring for children when you are the provider that is certified. But if its an "under the table" business and the parents are ok with this arrangement then do what you do.
BFP #1 11/07/2012 EDD 07/09/2013 M/C 11/22/2012
BFP #2 02/05/2013 EDD 09/19/2013 Arrived via c-section 09/27/2013