MBF

chevronseven · May 2014

I am awake at 3 a.m. So I thought I'd get this train rolling. I have a few things to bitch about.

#1: When people on Facebook keep posting their "In case you thought Memorial Day was all about a day off work and a BBQ..." pictures and stories. DH is going into the Air Force, his brother is in the Army, his and my grandparents have served, I remember and appreciate all their sacrifices and especially those of the ones who gave it all. Doesn't mean I need to sit and be depressed on Memorial Day. Stop trying to make me feel guilty about enjoying a day off work and some good food!

#2: When I'm at the grocery store clearly in "the zone" and moving with a purpose, that's when the employees want to be all overly friendly and chatty. Not when I'm clearly wandering back and forth looking at aisle signs trying to find something and actually need their help!

#3: My dad is being weirdly annoying about our name choice (which we have had picked out for years). We're naming DS James Joseph. James is after DH's great grandfather and also my mom's brother Jimmy who died from a drug overdose before I was born. Joseph is after my dad (so you'd think he'd be more appreciative!) and also because it is DH's middle name in honor of his uncle's middle name, who died in a motorcycle accident before DH was born. We had planned on calling him JJ, but lately just James sounds right. Well my dad insists that he's gonna call him JJ. I said that's fine, grandparents are allowed to have special nicknames they use, but he kept going on about how we should call him that too "so he can have his own identity." Wtf does that even mean? JJ is just as common a name as James, and DH actually has a cousin who goes by JJ, so really that's even less "his own identity." And this is coming from a man who absolutely abhors anything new and different, so had we picked a unique name he'd be mad about that too. Turns out he doesn't want him to be associated with my mom's brother because of how he died. Charming.

I'm sure I'll think of more, I always have good ideas for these weekly threads and then forget them when the day rolls around!

TugboatSheila · May 2014

livelaughlove88 said:
I am awake at 3 a.m. So I thought I'd get this train rolling. I have a few things to bitch about.

#1: When people on Facebook keep posting their "In case you thought Memorial Day was all about a day off work and a BBQ..." pictures and stories. DH is going into the Air Force, his brother is in the Army, his and my grandparents have served, I remember and appreciate all their sacrifices and especially those of the ones who gave it all. Doesn't mean I need to sit and be depressed on Memorial Day. Stop trying to make me feel guilty about enjoying a day off work and some good food!

#2: When I'm at the grocery store clearly in "the zone" and moving with a purpose, that's when the employees want to be all overly friendly and chatty. Not when I'm clearly wandering back and forth looking at aisle signs trying to find something and actually need their help!

#3: My dad is being weirdly annoying about our name choice (which we have had picked out for years). We're naming DS James Joseph. James is after DH's great grandfather and also my mom's brother Jimmy who died from a drug overdose before I was born. Joseph is after my dad (so you'd think he'd be more appreciative!) and also because it is DH's middle name in honor of his uncle's middle name, who died in a motorcycle accident before DH was born. We had planned on calling him JJ, but lately just James sounds right. Well my dad insists that he's gonna call him JJ. I said that's fine, grandparents are allowed to have special nicknames they use, but he kept going on about how we should call him that too "so he can have his own identity." Wtf does that even mean? JJ is just as common a name as James, and DH actually has a cousin who goes by JJ, so really that's even less "his own identity." And this is coming from a man who absolutely abhors anything new and different, so had we picked a unique name he'd be mad about that too. Turns out he doesn't want him to be associated with my mom's brother because of how he died. Charming.

I'm sure I'll think of more, I always have good ideas for these weekly threads and then forget them when the day rolls around!

Just my take on what your dad says but I think he was referring to the names connected with someone who has passed away. I know this was a major concern for one of my friends whose brother died and they wanted to name their son after him. They wound up naming him the name anyway but expressed the worry that his identity would be laden with the death of their loved one.

TugboatSheila · May 2014

I can't nest today until my FIL and DH finish touching up the paint in the nursery.

Never underestimate the power of a nesting mama.

[Deleted User] · May 2014

I also was awake at 3 am. And now 6 am. Body, why can't I sleep in today? Tiny human, why can't you stop squishing my bladder for just one night??!

cakebatter27 · May 2014

Last night we went to my in laws for dinner. When I mentioned how we finally decided on a pediatrician group (one multiple friends use and love) my mil mentioned how she loved theirs when dh and my BIL were little and they're still in practice.

I'm pretty sure my annoyance didn't go unnoticed. This is our child and we'll pick our own doctor. Down the road we can always switch.

AMcLaws · May 2014

I'm getting sick. FML.

jcartz · May 2014

DD woke up at 4 crying & DH didn't hear her. Per usual. So annoying and one of the things I dread about the newborn stage again... He could sleep through a friggin parade! I hope this kid is a better sleeper than #1!

Csltdk · May 2014

I have literally had ENOUGH of my MIL. I'm tired of not being able to wear a bra around my house becuase she just stops bye. I'm annoyed that the gift she got me for my baby shower was the cake. I'm tired of her buying Ellie religious books she buys from garage sales. I'm tired of her complaining that we won't let her take Ellie to church.

Overall I'm fucking done.

jensavicci · May 2014

I've had the most intense lower back pain for about two weeks now. Basically, bending over or squatting down is now physically impossible. Even if I could reach, my back would not allow me to go down or back up. It's not labor back pain because it only hurts if I move a certain way whereas my back labor pain throbs and sort of makes its way to my feet. So basically, I'm just falling a part and having to lay down most of the time. Sitting only adds pressure. Ugh.

MonkeyJD · May 2014

My grandfather & his girlfriend were both being asshats this weekend (which I expected) but it really ticked me off and hurt my feelings when he called me fat multiple times

Mrs.DeRuysscher · May 2014

Mil is no longer part of our lives.. very long story ill gI've you the short version. They got divorced bc she says fil was abusive jealous ect real reason which she won't admit is bc she was messaging this other guy going to see him what not and started becoming very sneaky (dh & his brother both saw her messages and stuff) but her sneaky made fil jealous... any way so they got divorced well its still going on. Dh has two oldest brothers who have a different mom the mil. Then there is hi other older brother and him. No one wanted to speak or have anything to do with her even her oldest son for the most part its because they are hurt and upset and tires of being lied to. She kept bugging dh and I to speak with her so I finally got dh to agree. When we got married dh didn't want her there and I agreed as it was his choice but told him he could change his mind any time. Well we continued to speak with her for awhile but every time we visited she would always try and get info out of us about other family members and if something small came out like dhs brother living with his gf she would go and message him and bug him then they would get mad at us. So the last time she messaged me and asked for dhs brothers gfs full name basically to stalk her and bug her on facebook this made me angry and I sent her a very long but not rude message explaining that we are not here to give her info out of family and if they want to talk with her or for her to know info they would tell her and that if she wanted to visit with us they visits would be just about us if she couldn't keep it like that we would remove her. Well she took it and deleted and blocked us on Facebook. Now trying again to make herself seem like a victim to her family and that we are the bad people l. She even texted dh and said well if you care your cousin is in hospital.. which we knew of this already. I'm so angry at her and just want to yell at her and speak my mind everything I have ever held in I told dh that before she could ever become part of our lives again I would be doing this and he said I could lol... his mom has always hated me to the point of telling me I was not good enough for her son I can persuade him better than she can bc I can use two sets of lips and she only has one and even thinking I manipulated him that he has no mind of his own and I have kept my mouth shut for it all. I have decided no more... sorry the short form is long and any spelling errors I'm on a cell.

zellatrix · May 2014

I am one of a few in town that actually has to work today... even the other higher ed places are closed. But, not us. And my son's school is out, so he is here with me... And he is just being so damn annoying charming... He started the ride to work today with a deep conversation about mosquitos and how they suck blood. Because I need to talk about that first thing.

Csltdk · May 2014

Sgreen19 said:
I can persuade him better than she can bc I can use two sets of lips and she only has one

Um... EW

AMcLaws · May 2014

Csltdk said:

Sgreen19 said:
I can persuade him better than she can bc I can use two sets of lips and she only has one
Um... EW

Glad I'm not the only one who was trying not to vomit at that sentence.

likeanoldtimemovie · May 2014

@sgreen19 I get that you're on mobile, but damn girl. That post is like looking at a wall of hieroglyphics for me. WHAT AM I READING WHERE ARE THE COMMAS

AMcLaws · May 2014

likeanoldtimemovie said:
@sgreen19 I get that you're on mobile, but damn girl. That post is like looking at a wall of hieroglyphics for me. WHAT AM I READING WHERE ARE THE COMMAS

I'm on mobile 99% of the time, and I manage to format pretty well. Also, the use of punctuation does not escape me.

zellatrix · May 2014

symphony4586 said:

UGH!! While I was at my friends's place last night SO's mom sat him down and told him she thinks that because we're not married when my parents head back to Florida this fall/winter that I'm going to pack up the kid and take off with them. He told her how how BSC she was sounding, but seriously I'm so fucking done with this crazy bitch!

Jesus... just because you aren't married doesn't mean he isn't still the father. You can't get away with doing that (even if you wanted to) being unmarried either. He can just as easily take you to court for moving out of state as if you were married. But, how sweet fucking crazy of her to try to put that kind of paranoia in his head. Because a new dad needs more things to worry about.

beff12 · May 2014

My parents and the in-laws are coming up for a cookout today. We have school, but DH has off so they'll be getting to the house before I'm home. He'll then have to leave for a time before I get home, so it'll just be the parents at our house for a while. We're not worried about my parents, but MIL being left at our house without either of us there scares me. I could have spent my weekend deep-cleaning the house (which let's be serious, I didn't) and she would still find the one speck of dirt left on the floor and offer to vacuum. I get that she's trying to be sweet but it annoys me to no end. She also wanted to come up and cook everything (for the cookout that we're hosting?) so that "Beth wouldn't have to do anything after a long day of school." Because let's not forget, all pregnant women are disabled! Meh.

likeanoldtimemovie · May 2014

symphony4586 said:

UGH!! While I was at my friends's place last night SO's mom sat him down and told him she thinks that because we're not married when my parents head back to Florida this fall/winter that I'm going to pack up the kid and take off with them. He told her how how BSC she was sounding, but seriously I'm so fucking done with this crazy bitch!

Oh Lawd. This reminds me of something my MIL said a few months ago. DH is a truck driver and was offered a position where he would be gone two nights a week, but off three full days (including the weekend). It was a significant pay increase, too, so he took it. When he told his mom about it, the first thing she said was, "Well... if it were me, I wouldn't want you to go. All it takes is for you to meet some girl at one of your stops, especially if you see her every week, and then realize that you're not going home that night. And back home, all it'll take is for someone to notice how pretty Sam is and find out she's home alone two nights a week and there you go."

...glad you have such faith in us. Because you're right, "all it takes" for either of us to cheat on each other is to be away for two nights a week and meet a random person.

likeanoldtimemovie · May 2014

beff12 said:

My parents and the in-laws are coming up for a cookout today. We have school, but DH has off so they'll be getting to the house before I'm home. He'll then have to leave for a time before I get home, so it'll just be the parents at our house for a while. We're not worried about my parents, but MIL being left at our house without either of us there scares me. I could have spent my weekend deep-cleaning the house (which let's be serious, I didn't) and she would still find the one speck of dirt left on the floor and offer to vacuum. I get that she's trying to be sweet but it annoys me to no end. She also wanted to come up and cook everything (for the cookout that we're hosting?) so that "Beth wouldn't have to do anything after a long day of school." Because let's not forget, all pregnant women are disabled! Meh.

The very thought of my MIL being left alone in my house... oh dear Lord, no. When we all went to Disney World a few years ago, DH and I took the kids to an outlet mall connected to our hotel while we were waiting on her to get ready. The hotel was more like a condo with three bedrooms, kitchen, living room, etc. We realized she hadn't called us and we'd been shopping for about two hours. DH and I got PISSED because who the hell goes to Disney World to shop, so we headed back to the hotel to grab the car and leave.

When we got upstairs to tell MIL we were going, we found out what was taking so long. She had cleaned our entire room. Not BIL and SIL's room, but ours. Yes, it was a mess. No, we hadn't put our clothes from the suitcase into the dresser drawers or our toiletries in the bathroom drawers because we are on VACATION and only going to be there for five days. She had re-organized everything, made our bed, put all of our clothes away, vacuumed, etc. I felt utterly violated.

likeanoldtimemovie · May 2014

Obviously, the M in MBF should just stand for mother-in-law.

beff12 · May 2014

likeanoldtimemovie said:

Obviously, the M in MBF should just stand for mother-in-law.

Agreed. Your MIL sounds crazy. I would have been livid if I was in your situation! You're brave to travel with her. Vacation with in-laws is a whole different story. She wants to go somewhere with us so bad, but I don't like how they vacation...every minute of every day must be scheduled to the minute and she wants to see every single thing that there is to see. My parents are the exact opposite - wake up and do whatever you feel like doing that day, even if that's sitting on the beach for hours. MIL really wants both of our families to go somewhere together...I'm twitching just thinking about it.

SuperTinkerham · May 2014

My shower was yesterday. My family embarrassed me horribly in front of people. It was once again a reminder if how awful my family is when compared to other people.

My mom said I looked like the hulk the day before the shower. Her gift was a hideous blanket she stole from her blanket making club. (They make blankets for kids w cancer) and she told everyone this. She was nasty about all the clothes we received. My 10 yr old niece was horrible. Locked herself in the guest bathroom crying for 30 minutes.

Oh and my mom complained about my dad in front of everybody. Afterwards telling me she's suing him for back child support of me. I'm 35 years old. They've been separated since I was 12, divorced since I was 16.

I cried myself to sleep last night. I just can't cope w the crazy at this point.

SuperTinkerham · May 2014

One more thing. Everyone kept telling me I need to have a girl next time. I went through hell to get pregnant. Surgeries, IVF, miscarriages. It's really hurtful when you feel like the kid (I pretty much consider a miracle) isn't good enough because he has boy parts instead of girl parts.

TugboatSheila · May 2014

SuperTinkerham said:

My shower was yesterday. My family embarrassed me horribly in front of people. It was once again a reminder if how awful my family is when compared to other people. My mom said I looked like the hulk the day before the shower. Her gift was a hideous blanket she stole from her blanket making club. (They make blankets for kids w cancer) and she told everyone this. She was nasty about all the clothes we received. My 10 yr old niece was horrible. Locked herself in the guest bathroom crying for 30 minutes. Oh and my mom complained about my dad in front of everybody. Afterwards telling me she's suing him for back child support of me. I'm 35 years old. They've been separated since I was 12, divorced since I was 16. I cried myself to sleep last night. I just can't cope w the crazy at this point.

Ugh, sorry to hear all that. That is a rough situation, I would have reacted the same way.

Side quesiton though: can one even sue someone else for child support after that amount of time?

JLHV1909 · May 2014

1). This weekend we are step-daughter free (this never happens-ever) and instead of using some of the alone time to spend together, my dh has spent every spare second with his BFF or planning or attending someone's cookout (with me). I just wanted to spend one night just the two of us, since just the two of us on these rare occasions that sd is gone is about to cease to exsist when LO arrives.

2) If one more person tells me that I'm gonna go on bed rest or have this LO early I may lose my shit on them...yes I have club feet by the end of the day, yes they hurt some nights, but my weight gain is fine, my urine is fine, and my bp is excellent. If it was an issue, I'd think my doctor would have said something other than "welcome to being pregnant in the south during the summer- your feet are only going to get worse!"

lindslalala · May 2014

Our A/C is broke and it's been 80+ degrees here lately. The guy who was supposed to replace it cancelled last week and DH refuses to "pester" him about rescheduling. I packed up DS and spent last night at my parent's house (DH was at work) because our house is so unbearably hot. DH thinks I'm "overreacting". Seriously? Ugh.

chevronseven · May 2014

SuperTinkerham said:
One more thing. Everyone kept telling me I need to have a girl next time. I went through hell to get pregnant. Surgeries, IVF, miscarriages. It's really hurtful when you feel like the kid (I pretty much consider a miracle) isn't good enough because he has boy parts instead of girl parts.

OMG I'm so sorry! Like you have any control over your baby's sex. And how fucking insensitive of them after everything you went through. Your mom sounds like a piece of work...just curious, are you keeping the blanket? If it were me I would probably give it back to the group or donate it myself to a cancer patient. Also, why was your niece crying for half an hour? Sounds like an awful day that should have been a great one, I just feel so bad for you for having to deal with all that!

[Deleted User] · May 2014

The user and all related content has been deleted.

tourqeyes · May 2014

LiteraChick said:

Only thing I can bitch about is the fact my donut is gone. Hugs to you ladies with MIL problems. Just remember, YOU are in the power position here and they ultimately know that. Thus them being giant whiny cunts

Why did you only have/get one donut?

hgtvmom · May 2014

Seriously, I pretty much have nothing today. All I can come up with is that today starts bi-weekly NSTs and since it's, ya know, a holiday, I have to go to L&D to have it done. But, silver lining is that DH gets to (or is being force to. Whatever) go with me and take a tour of sorts. He's been super freaked about not knowing exactly where to go (in case I'm comatose when I go in to labor?? Or I lose my mind and can't remember where to go??). Hopefully this will calm him down.

SuperTinkerham · May 2014

JP27 said:

SuperTinkerham said:

My shower was yesterday. My family embarrassed me horribly in front of people. It was once again a reminder if how awful my family is when compared to other people. My mom said I looked like the hulk the day before the shower. Her gift was a hideous blanket she stole from her blanket making club. (They make blankets for kids w cancer) and she told everyone this. She was nasty about all the clothes we received. My 10 yr old niece was horrible. Locked herself in the guest bathroom crying for 30 minutes. Oh and my mom complained about my dad in front of everybody. Afterwards telling me she's suing him for back child support of me. I'm 35 years old. They've been separated since I was 12, divorced since I was 16. I cried myself to sleep last night. I just can't cope w the crazy at this point.

Ugh, sorry to hear all that. That is a rough situation, I would have reacted the same way.

Side quesiton though: can one even sue someone else for child support after that amount of time?

According to google, she has until 4 years after I turn 18 in tx. He just inherited monies from his mom that passed away. He was a shit parent, too. He could voluntarily give her money if he wanted. I was in foster care and a homeless shelter in HS bc of their crazy, so I'm just not very sympathetic to either one of them.

TexasGirl81 · May 2014

@SuperTinkerham‌
I'm so sorry you are in this situation. How shitty!! I've said it before and I'll say it again. Soon you will realize that all you will end up needing in life is your mister and baby. At the end of the day you all take care of each other and that's all that matters.

Fun fact: same shit happened to me last year with the sex of the baby. H has 2 girls from previous marriage. So when we told fam that we were having a girl, there were literally tears. Not happy tears either, they all wanted a boy so badly that this was the worst news ever. I couldn't fucking believe it. Now of course they love the crap out of her, but it's scary that there are such idiots out there who believe that the sex of a baby really fucking matters. We have a boy on the way and it kills me how over the moon they are.

Anyways, hugs to you and I hope things get better quickly! And.......we live so close we need to have a meet up. Let me know if you're up to it. I would love to meet another bumpie.

(Totally not a creep trying to meet up) lol!!

tourqeyes · May 2014

I just have this constant pain on the underside of my belly. I want to ffw through the next few weeks.

TricksyPixie · May 2014

I freaking woke up early and did my chores, are and got ready for some extra hours at work (work at a skating rink, private party was reserved for 2 hours) got there, cleaned up, waited for about 45 minutes before boss man called and the people said they cancelled, when, in fact, they did not. I woke up early after spending the night out watching x-men (hey, I only got a few more weeks where I can) just to be disappointed by waking up and NOT MAKING ANY FREAKING MONEY. And the rink is technically closed for the summer, and no one wants to hire a 33-week along pregnant lady WHO NEEDS MONEY. I'm endlessly frustrated.

Also my
In-laws can't pay their effing bills so everyone be mooching off my Internet and using my damn shower. Mind you these folks plan to go on a cruise in July. I'm sick of the shit. I love them. I love they help fix up the house. But for shit's sake, if my utility bill is high and if there's an extra charge to my Internet because it's being used more, THEY ARE PAYING THE DIFFERENCE, BECAUSE I DONT F(honk)ING PLAY THIS GAME.

avacek1 · May 2014

Why isn't there medication for hand, foot and mouth disease? DS has been dealing with it since Friday. The past two nights he hasn't slept more than two hours at a time. And the
poor guy is whiny when he is awake thanks to the blisters. This prego is exhausted!

tourqeyes · May 2014

jessa8907 said:

DH needs to start putting out.

Read: pulling out. Immediate reaction: why, that will do no good right now in your current state.

kwh33ls · May 2014

tourqeyes said:

jessa8907 said:

DH needs to start putting out.

Read: pulling out. Immediate reaction: why, that will do no good right now in your current state.

I thought the same thing. Then I re-read it, correctly, and second that. He says it's a "mental block" because the baby is big enough for him to feel, so it creeps him out. He needs to get over it.

jensavicci · May 2014

tourqeyes said:

jessa8907 said:

DH needs to start putting out.

Read: pulling out.

Immediate reaction: why, that will do no good right now in your current state.
----------------------

Ded.

tourqeyes · May 2014

kwh33ls said:

tourqeyes said:

jessa8907 said:

DH needs to start putting out.

Read: pulling out. Immediate reaction: why, that will do no good right now in your current state.

I thought the same thing. Then I re-read it, correctly, and second that. He says it's a "mental block" because the baby is big enough for him to feel, so it creeps him out. He needs to get over it.

I love how big men's egos are. DH is in the same mental state.

chrinikki1 · May 2014

@SuperTinkerham‌ I am so sorry to hear your family couldn't get it together. I was really hoping they'd come through and surprise you with normalcy. I wish there was a pill for normalcy... I'd jump all over slipping that in my moms food!

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