Baby shower question ...

Nfranco973 · May 2014

So, we have talked about baby showers here and there. My question for you bumpies is..
At how many months are you having your baby shower?
So you think it is ever too early or late?
Curious to know what you gals think.

montella1064 · May 2014

I'm not having one this time around but with DS I had mine around 7 1/2 months.

missnacholover · May 2014

I'm having mine a little more than 2 months before my EDD. It's a little early but I'm also traveling 7 hours in the car for it, soooooo.

JamieK1882 · May 2014

I THINK mine is Oct 12 (due 11-18). Mom was adamant about but having it before 7 months. DH is worried it's too late. Honestly the Pittsburgh Steelers football schedule dictated the date : )

Nfranco973 · May 2014

missnacholover said:
I'm having mine a little more than 2 months before my EDD. It's a little early but I'm also traveling 7 hours in the car for it, soooooo.

Me too! I always have mine at 7 months. I will be this time too, as my doc has mentioned that I have a good chance of another preterm labor because of my last two preg.

Dimples0101 · May 2014

I'm not having one for my second, but with DD, I was a little over 7 1/2 months.

NLJ82 · May 2014

I'm having one at about 8 months. Hopefully that's not too late, but it'll be on October 11th & I'm due on Nov. 13th

kjmommy1214 · May 2014

Last time, I had mine a month before my due date. It gave me plenty of time to get last minute things and thank yous done before baby came. I doubt I will have one this time unless MIL does something to get everyone together. She likes family gatherings.

Nfranco973 · May 2014

Anybody having one after the baby is born? I know some people are kind of superstitious with that.. And some it's a tradition..

carcrashheart · May 2014

I had mine on a Saturday in September. I was 33 or 34w. I was due at the end of October but delivered a few weeks early. Usually 1-2 months before is about normal. I didn't wan to have it on a Sunday bc we were OOT and I wanted a day to relax and pack up before heading back. As for having things during steeler games: I hate the steelers and football so eff that. I had to compromise and not have DS's first birthday the day after his birthday (Sunday) bc the game was at 1pm and it pissed me off. Grow the hell up. I lost the battle and had his party the following Sunday and let people know in the invites that there would be radios with the game in the space we had the party at. I was prepared to throw a fit if people wandered out to find tv's. You're there for a gathering not to watch a sporting event and be totally engrossed. Check on the score and get back to the event a hand. We managed to not have any trouble during his birthday party, thank goodness.

TXPyroMom · May 2014

kyliedaniellexx said:

I have no idea when my shower will be.
A friend and my MIL and both insisting on throwing me one, still not sure how that's all going to work out.

I might have a small one with friends and a larger shower with family.
Unless that's totally taboo or something.

I don't think two showers is taboo. I had two for my first pregnancy...one for friends thrown by my sorority sisters and one for family thrown by my cousin. My mother attended both showers.

This go around I will be having a small one thrown by my best friend. It will only be family and close friends.... now a shower for a pregnancy other than your first is certainly a no-no to some people, but those people aren't invited to my shower, so I really don't give a flip

mander82 · May 2014

I think the general rule of thumb is about a month prior to your due date. you can do it whenever the hell you want though.....ha ha.

I am due 11/17. Mine will probably be either the 1st or 2nd weekend in October. SD's birthday is Oct 24th, so I want to steer clear of that. I don't think I will be up for back to back booked weekends at that time. Also, Halloween!!! I LOVE Halloween, so I want it to be done before that too.

emoxymoose · May 2014

TXPyroMom said:

kyliedaniellexx said:

I have no idea when my shower will be.
A friend and my MIL and both insisting on throwing me one, still not sure how that's all going to work out.

I might have a small one with friends and a larger shower with family.
Unless that's totally taboo or something.

I don't think two showers is taboo. I had two for my first pregnancy...one for friends thrown by my sorority sisters and one for family thrown by my cousin. My mother attended both showers.

This go around I will be having a small one thrown by my best friend. It will only be family and close friends.... now a shower for a pregnancy other than your first is certainly a no-no to some people, but those people aren't invited to my shower, so I really don't give a flip

I really don't see why people care so much. I was annoyed because a VERY good friend of mine had a shower for herself and she was having another girl and her first wasn't even two yet. That being said I just attended one for a cousin's 4th baby and her only girl. Everyone was so excited for her and all wanted to celebrate.

wallygirl · May 2014

TXPyroMom said:

kyliedaniellexx said:

I have no idea when my shower will be.
A friend and my MIL and both insisting on throwing me one, still not sure how that's all going to work out.

I might have a small one with friends and a larger shower with family.
Unless that's totally taboo or something.

I don't think two showers is taboo. I had two for my first pregnancy...one for friends thrown by my sorority sisters and one for family thrown by my cousin. My mother attended both showers.

This go around I will be having a small one thrown by my best friend. It will only be family and close friends.... now a shower for a pregnancy other than your first is certainly a no-no to some people, but those people aren't invited to my shower, so I really don't give a flip

It isn't taboo. I actually had 3. My SIL had one for my friends and family. My church had one for my church family. My MIL and SIL threw one for my husband's family. They live about 3.5 hours away so we kept it separate from my family. The only overlap in invites were our moms and sisters or SILs.

At one I was about 6 months, another around 7-7.5 months and the last about 8 months.

Edit: forgot to answer op question

sweetbabyrahe · May 2014

I don't plan to have any this time around, but I had three with DS. I think one at 6.5 months (travelled 4 hours) then the other two 7-7.5 months. I have a huge family so I had plenty of showers, but I did want to have as much of the stuff before baby arrived.

krgriffin26 · May 2014

My friends are planning mine for the middle of September. I will only be about 7 months but my mother will be flying in for it from NC and she didn't want to come for a shower then come right back for the birth a month later. Plus October is crazy around here. Lots of birthdays and a friend is getting married, so if it doesn't happen in September, who knows when it would happen.

wildflower75 · May 2014

I don't know that I am having one this time around. Last time, the shower was planned approximately 6-7 weeks before my EDD but it was postponed due to a snow storm. We rescheduled to the next date that worked for my hostess which happened to be one week before I actually gave birth (DD came early!)

The thing about a shower is you don't want to have it too close to your due date in case your baby comes early and in order for you to have everything you need for your baby. I knew I would receive a lot of my registry at my shower but wanted enough time to shop for whatever was missing. Plus washing all the clothes and setting up the nursery (not to mention a lot of what you receive will need to be assembled, add batteries etc...) takes time!

CPM13 · May 2014

I was 8-8 1/2 months along with DD at my shower. It felt like the right time frame to me.

xiaopeapod · May 2014

It's my first one, but there's been no talk of a baby shower yet. Still a little early I think. Will probably have one at work like they do for all the other moms before me, but I'll just not have one if no one offers to host one for family and friends. We will be doing an afterbirth banquet for sure though, as it's tradition.

momtojad · May 2014

I was 37 weeks when I had my shower and it was nice to have something to look forward to.

AnnieRoo13 · May 2014

My SIL and I were discussing this on the weekend. She surprised me by saying she'd like to organize the shower (I always thought she didn't really like me) and she suggested a couple of dates- one the end of August and the other mid September. These are purely out of convenience for her as they are busy with vacations etc. and I don't really have much of a preference. I'm actually happy to have the shower a little earlier rather than later so I can purchase anything else I need and get organized before the baby arrives especially since I'm going to try to work until November 1 (due November 9) so I won't have a lot of extra time off beforehand.

Can a shower be too early? My other SIL lives across the country and suggested we have my shower in June because she'll be around- ya that's too early IMO.

ccam · May 2014

For DS, I had 2 showers since my family is out of state - one at 32 weeks and the other at 33 weeks, so about 7.5 months. No showers this time.

Maelara · May 2014

I had mine a month before I was due last time. This time it will just be a meet and greet

mussalynn · May 2014

Sounds like I'm a loner here - I had my shower about a month after DS was born. Not out of superstition or anything, I just think baby showers are way more fun when there's actually a baby there! I'm also not into the baby shower games etc, just NMS, I just wanted people to come, visit, have a bite to eat and meet our little sweetheart.

Jack&Jill86 · May 2014

I'm a FTM but not really planning to have a shower, my step mom and mother in law have both offered but I just feel weird about having one partly because my closest friends have all moved away and I also don't have a ton of family here so I feel like there would only be about 6 guests and I also dislike being the center of attention. SM and MIL both seem disapointed about this so I think I'll keep an open mind for a few months before deciding for sure!

highbornhunter · May 2014

JamieK1882 - My due date is the Steelers/Ravens game. I plan on letting my parents know that this weekend. We'll all have a good laugh about it. I may ask to have the game put on in the delivery room, it might a good distraction, lol.

My mom and MIL both mentioned showers early on in my pregnancy but I have no idea what either of them is thinking for time frame. Since my family is 4 hours away, it makes sense to have one up home and one where DH and I live. I kind of like the idea of having my shower with my side of the family after the baby is born so they could all meet him/her. They won't get to be as much of a part of my kiddo's life as DH's family will, just based on geography. So we'll just see!

carmelissa · May 2014

My best friend is throwing my shower and lives out of town. We are currently thinking end of Aug, which is kind of early, but this will fit her schedule and should (fingers crossed) guarantee warm weather as it will be outside.

venussapphire · May 2014

I think around 7 months is a good time if you are having one

ktibbits1 · May 2014

My sister and I are talking dates this weekend. I need to have mine before I'm 28 weeks since I will most likely have to travel for it and won't be able to after that, on top of being too huge and uncomfortable I'm sure.

My friend who had her baby last week will be having a shower in another month or so. They're moving to a bigger apartment next month and were worried about not having enough space to store things. I don't think it matters when you have a shower, it's just nice that people want to celebrate your baby and support you!

crizz13 · May 2014

I'll be having mine the first weekend in September (I'll be just over 30 weeks).

jf198400 · May 2014

With DD my showers were when I was about 6.5 and 7 months pregnant, it was perfect.

SweetMelissa5 · May 2014

highbornhunter said:

JamieK1882 - My due date is the Steelers/Ravens game. I plan on letting my parents know that this weekend. We'll all have a good laugh about it. I may ask to have the game put on in the delivery room, it might a good distraction, lol.

My mom and MIL both mentioned showers early on in my pregnancy but I have no idea what either of them is thinking for time frame. Since my family is 4 hours away, it makes sense to have one up home and one where DH and I live. I kind of like the idea of having my shower with my side of the family after the baby is born so they could all meet him/her. They won't get to be as much of a part of my kiddo's life as DH's family will, just based on geography. So we'll just see!

I'm an Eagles fan, and my youngest was born the day the Eagles hired Chip Kelly, so the entire time I was in labor, we were watching the ESPN coverage from my hospital room; it did help to keep things interesting, but a game would be even better.

For the OP, I had my shower with my son when I was about 7 months, and that gave us more than enough time to get everything we needed and set up the nursery.

jlove253 · May 2014

I was given a few showers with dd. the first was at 15 weeks because I was heading home for Easter and it was the only time I'd be home besides being there for step sister's wedding. When my family first told me what they were doing I felt hesitant because 15 weeks is so early!! But it also was a huge encouragement because I was puking so much. Second was a church shower about a month before dd was due. Finally my former work place through a shower when dd was 3 months old! That was a huge surprise because I had had to quit when I was 13 weeks along because 1) I couldn't stop puking and 2) boss wanted me to come in a work on Saturdays, unpaid, to make things extra special in my classroom (I taught preschool). My old boss, who acted really happy for me my whole pregnancy didn't show up, and I'm not a petty person but I felt like that showed her true colors. (Sorry for the little vent there!)

So, we were really blessed and had showers at all spans of time. I felt most comfortable at the one at 8 months because I looked pregnant, but didnt have to worry about dd (who was dealing with an undiagnosed liver infection at the time), and nursing and feeling exhausted

ETA: I don't expect a shower with this baby

KLKilgore · May 2014

I'm due 11/6 and we are planning on the end of September. I am going home this summer for a few weeks and will be having one there in July. I know it is early, but it is 10+ hours to drive up and I can't take a week off once school starts in September. We had to do the same thing with my wedding and it was fine. It spread the excitement out, which was nice!

lizgrace03 · May 2014

My MIL is planning mine for the end of July. I'm due Oct. 31. I know that's really early, but it was the only date that worked out for a lot of the family who will be travelling to attend.

Nfranco973 · May 2014

I've heard people say that they don't want to have too many showers. I'm guessing for ppl that have kids close together in age. Question, is it because the children are close in age and you maybe would feel like you are mooching? Cause I did hear something like that over on the bs board. Like it's unethical or something. I believe every baby should be showered individually. I mean to me it's not all about the gifts. It's about family, friends, food and being around the people you love at such a great time in your life. Although gifts are nice but I don't expect to get the whole babies r us ?! U kno wAt I mean? Is there such rule?

TeeJ526 · May 2014

I'm not sure if I want one. My Mom and DH have already pegged me as not likely to have one, but we'll see.

sparklingwhit · May 2014

I'm having two showers apparently. One here and one in my hometown.

Since I'll have to fly in to my hometown I guess they are throwing that one in late July, so SUPER early! I mean I will only be 26ish weeks! My family really wants to throw me one though, so I'll take it!

My other shower is being thrown by SIL and will prob be in August sometime. Also really early, but I have a good friend that is moving out of state in Sept and she insisted that they throw it before she goes.

Basically, it's not up to me so I'm just going to go along for the ride and not complain

Nfranco973 · May 2014

jlove253 said:
I was given a few showers with dd. the first was at 15 weeks because I was heading home for Easter and it was the only time I'd be home besides being there for step sister's wedding. When my family first told me what they were doing I felt hesitant because 15 weeks is so early!! But it also was a huge encouragement because I was puking so much. Second was a church shower about a month before dd was due. Finally my former work place through a shower when dd was 3 months old! That was a huge surprise because I had had to quit when I was 13 weeks along because 1) I couldn't stop puking and 2) boss wanted me to come in a work on Saturdays, unpaid, to make things extra special in my classroom (I taught preschool). My old boss, who acted really happy for me my whole pregnancy didn't show up, and I'm not a petty person but I felt like that showed her true colors. (Sorry for the little vent there!)

So, we were really blessed and had showers at all spans of time. I felt most comfortable at the one at 8 months because I looked pregnant, but didnt have to worry about dd (who was dealing with an undiagnosed liver infection at the time), and nursing and feeling exhausted

ETA: I don't expect a shower with this baby

I understand the boss situation. I would be pretty peeved if mine didn't come. Although, he's a man but a very good friend of mine and DH because we all have worked together at another company way before my boss had his own. Which brings me another inquiry, I have a lot of male co workers, do I leave them out of the shower? Do you think men at baby showers is tacky? Also, DH may want his friends to attend as well?

SweetMelissa5 · May 2014

Nfranco973 said:

I've heard people say that they don't want to have too many showers. I'm guessing for ppl that have kids close together in age. Question, is it because the children are close in age and you maybe would feel like you are mooching? Cause I did hear something like that over on the bs board. Like it's unethical or something. I believe every baby should be showered individually. I mean to me it's not all about the gifts. It's about family, friends, food and being around the people you love at such a great time in your life. Although gifts are nice but I don't expect to get the whole babies r us ?! U kno wAt I mean? Is there such rule?

There is an etiquette rule that a woman gets a shower for her first baby only because the purpose of a shower is to honor a woman as she becomes a mother. Some people will care more than others about showers for subsequent babies, and in some circles it is both normal and expected to have multiple showers. I've never seen anyone have an issue with celebrating the baby in some fashion, whether it's a meet the baby party or a brunch or a tea that gathers the mother's close friends and family members, but if it's billed as a shower than gifts are expected (that's what the name means, to shower the guest of honor with presents), but some people do find it tacky and gift-grabby to have showers for multiple children.

sparklingwhit · May 2014

@NFranco973 I agree that each baby should be celebrated individually, but let's be honest, the shower is more for the mom. The baby is not there to be "celebrated". Also, I think that registering for a second child is completely tactless.

Basically, I have friends who have had a second child and we still get together to celebrate and we usually bring a couple clothing items or things like that, but there is nothing official, and certainly no registry.

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