How involved is your SO?

nittanyllama · May 2014

I'm not defending OP at all, but it does seem like an uneven amount of responsibility falls to the woman to figure out this TTC stuff. So I get why she feels it's not "fair" but that's just how it is and MAKING him do anything isn't going to help.

MH is actually pretty curious about it all. He asks questions and wants to see my chart, like it's a puzzle he can try to figure out. He's totally ok with sex on-demand during FW and doesn't seem to be phased by any type of pressure. He does draw the line at talking about CM so he asked me to just tell him if "signs are go" or if I have some "good stuff' going on.

JRClaire · May 2014

I'm pretty Type A and prefer to just handle the charting myself. He is interested when I talk to him about it all and that's enough for me.

augustbride082512 · May 2014

We made the decision together to start ttc.. so far, he hasn't asked too many questions. I bought an opk the other day and left it in the bathroom for him to see, needless to say, he didn't say anything about it! I told him last night I was going to test and asked if he wanted to come in while I did it, he passed. But later on, he asked "if I was fertile" I think it's good to keep him in the loop, but not overwhelm him.

jaytee16 · May 2014

At this point, he fills a cup on demand and holds my hand while I get sperminated. It's romantic.

MrsZ1891 · May 2014

All these ladies on here are right when they say don't force him! If he feels too much pressure, he is not going to want to get busy.

Jay_Cee · May 2014

My H is involved in that he ejaculates where he should and when he should.

I'm not charting right now though (I am a FAM master - charted to avoid for almost 5 years altogether), so I pretty much am not doing any "work" either.

I think you are setting yourself up to make TTC a chore, and that's never a good thing. I would also highly suggest not having your H record your temps.

AnonymousNurse · May 2014

babeRN101 said:

My DH thought that we would get KTFU the first time we had sex after I skipped my first BC pill... So his sex-ed info is limited. He also was weirded out that I had to use my pee for the OPKs.....He's a special squirrel indeed.
He basically knows I temp to monitor ovulation and pee on some sticks every now and then. That's bout it!

My husband thought the same thing - he was so surprised when I didn't get KTFU that first cycle. He also thought it was the craziest thing in the world for me to use OPKs and still believes any method of pinpointing ovulation is "overkill" and for people who have been TTC for a super long time. At first I tried to just not talk about it much, but now that we're possibly starting testing I'm trying to slowly ease him into the conversation. He's still weird about things but he's coming around : )

wishiwaspreggo · May 2014

C makes fun of me for taking my temperature every morning and calls me "Amish". She doesn't come with me to ultrasound appointments (I don't feel it's necessary to force her to wake up at 6 am with me to drive 3 hours round trip to the RE for a 5 minute "Yup, your ovaries look good" scan). She will come to the IUI with me. I avoid letting her see me get my medicine together because she hovers and keeps asking "Are you sure you're doing that right?"

It will be her turn one day, most likely. It'll be interesting to see how she handles being the incubator! I've been trying to teach her about BBT and ovulation but she waves it off as "voodoo" and ignores me. Sigh.

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