Holidays: His Family or Yours?

xanadu94 · April 2014

As we approach another big holiday, I find myself yet again playing host to my husband's family. We seem to spend just about every holiday with either his mom or dad and while my side has never been big into the holidays, I would occasionally just like a break from in-laws and to spend the day with my family. How is everyone else doing it?

SandFHasse · April 2014

In the past we have split holidays and honestly it's a major pain in the ass. This Easter will most likely be the last one we split. We will do church with my grandpa, baskets with my mom, and dinner with his family this year.

DH said yesterday that if everybody wants to see us then they should come to us since its always us going to them.

berenely · April 2014

For the most part, we split. However, Thanksgiving and Christmas are an exception. Thanksgiving Day is spent with his family (my family has theirs on the Wednesday before), and Christmas is spent with my family (we do his family's Christmas either the weekend before or after). Other than that we try to split. Although his extended family rarely gets together. There's been some drama that dates back 20+ years and the other side of his family is so disorganized that DH's mom is usually left planning/hosting everything.

jmjj1310 · April 2014

We're a military family and wedon't live anywhere near either family, so we do all of our holidays at home or with a friends.

CopperT0p · April 2014

We tend to split it. We only ever host for my family since we have dogs and his mom is allergic.

Deblondie1 · April 2014

We live across the country from our families. So we don't celebrate with either.

mrsbeers · April 2014

SS- we live nine hours away from both families. We kind of split holidays/trips home, but haven't traveled in a year. We've done the past two Christmases and Thanksgivings here, just the two of us. His parents visited us last year for Easter. This year it's our first anniversary so were staying here with our babe.

last14real · April 2014

We split all the holidays and it is very stressful. We are trying to scale it back and get some us time in with our kids but then we get to deal with the grandparent guilt trip. We get until about 8 am just us and then bring on the family events church services, brunch, his parents, my parents, lunches dinners etc...

Hmvbaby14 · April 2014

SS- DH's family doesn't really celebrate but we live close to them. My family is crazy at every holiday but we live across the country. I've been trying to instill some of my family traditions on DH's family with minimal success.

thegosiers · April 2014

We don't live near family, so it's really only thanksgiving and Christmas that we travel for. We split Christmas, but spend turkey day with his folks. My family has some tension so we keep our visits with them brief. I really enjoy his family so it's NBD to me.

Toribaker171 · April 2014

SS- Depends on the holiday, plus most of our families live out of state and we rarely travel/ have them here for holidays. We split major holidays like Christmas and thanksgiving between both sides that live here (basically just parents, SO's siblings, and a few aunts and uncles on both sides), but Easter for instance we spend only with his side on the day of since mine has no younger kids here aside from LO, and we have no standing religious traditions. We also never host at our home.

jwp325 · April 2014

I put split but I guess kind of an SS in a way. Thanksgiving we alternate between his and mine. Christmas with FIL's side is celebrated early and we see MIL on Christmas Day for a little bit. This year may be a bit different since my mom will come out for DD's first birthday and stay for Christmas. Easter, we stop by MIL's house and then go to SIL's house to celebrate with FIL's side. Once we have a bigger place, we'll host Easter. Can't wait for that because SIL can't cook.

Pinknights · April 2014

We split each holiday. If we spend Thanksgiving with his family, then we do Christmas with mine and vice versa. It's easier this way. We each only have a few relatives close by, so I never get to spend the holidays with all our families.

Jackapatamus · April 2014

SS- my inlaws live 20 minutes away. My parents live part time in NY (near us) and part time in Florida. We do holidays at my house, my moms or my inlaws. Depends on what holiday, and where everyone is! Neither my parents nor my inlaws put preasure on us to be at any holiday. The only set holiday is that I hold a Christmas Eve dinner- but our friends and family are invited!

blue_elle · April 2014

We've been going to both, sometimes same day, sometimes we schedule different days. At Christmas we also have a thing at my grandmother's, so it's a lot of running around. We're trying to come up with a better system, especially now that we have a LO and will also have stuff to do at home (Christmas presents, Easter eggs, etc.)

jhjocelyn · April 2014

Fil is big on celebrating on the actual day, not when it's convienent for everyone. They are 45min away, so they get us most holidays . My family tends to get together whenever we can get us all to my parents. We all live more spread out than DH's side. So most of the time we end up celebrating with both sides.

peanutmuse · April 2014

I only counted Christmas and Thanksgiving -- in the past we have alternated those two each year. But now it will be different because I am not willing to travel to Atlanta for Christmas. I think it is important for Brennon to have the kind of Christmas I had growing up and be in his own house. Plus my husband's family barely celebrates. My MIL is miserable during the holidays and refuses to be cheered up. Refuses. I'm not subjecting my son to that.

Tylynngrace · April 2014

We try to split every holiday but my H isn't very flexible with it. His extended family doesn't get together for holidays but mine does so he insists we spend the holidays with his family so they're not lonely. Now I have to be the bad guy and make the plans and he has to go along with it. I'm sick of my inlaws

km_md · April 2014

We are lucky and live close to family. Holidays are usually extremely busy for us because we visit with my parents/family, DHs mom and her side and then DHs dad and his side (they are separated). For Christmas we do my moms for breakfast, DHs moms for lunch, some of my relatives for dinner and DHs aunts for Christmas Eve. It's crazy. I do enjoy going and seeing everyone but it's getting so hard to do this and work around everyone's schedules now.

ac1259 · April 2014

So for me DH's family is 20 minutes away and mine is 3 hours. Usually we spend the actual holiday with DH's family just because they're close and I do enjoy it. We usually do a separate special day to celebrate with my family when we can get to each other. With the girls' it's just a bit too much to travel 6 hours in 1 day to do a dinner. I feel bad sometimes that this is how it works out, it's just harder to travel currently with 2 littler babies.

mrsjenni · April 2014

Our families are amazing in helping us schedule our holidays so that we can be with both families. Luckily, we all live within 15 minutes of each other, so that helps a TON. But MIL always makes Thanksgiving dinner early (1pm) and my mom makes it late (5pm). We do Christmas Eve at my mom's annual party and Christmas morning with the in-laws then Christmas dinner with my family. For Easter, MIL always hosts an egg hunt and big dinner on the Saturday before Easter and my mom has hers on Easter. My mom actually comes to MIL's Easter dinner on Saturday and my in-laws come to my mom's Christmas Eve party. It's so nice!

candypantsls · April 2014

Our parents are 4 hours apart, but we live 20 hours from both, so we'll fly in to one family's, spend the holiday there, then drive down to the other afterward and fly out of there back home, and vice versa.

katags · April 2014

We try to see both families over thanksgiving and Christmas. DH's fam is 4.5hrs away, mine is 3.5. But my SIL lives in the same city as my parents, so my ILs make it easy on us for Thanksgiving and have dinner at SIL's house so we don't have to make 2 long drives.

The only time we've ever hosted a holiday at our house was this Christmas when I was 39w and couldn't travel. But we're military and this is the closest we've lived to family in the 8yrs we've been married.

This Easter will be at my parent's house. We won't see ILs, but we'll be visiting them in mid-May so it ultimately will even out.

MIT721 · April 2014

We split. DH's family is close by so we often do holidays with them. However for the biggies (Thiving and Christmas) either my parents fly up or we fly to them. Christmas is the toughest since flights are expensive and my mom rarely gets vacation at that time. We've been splitting holidays since we got together so it's easier with less drama these days! Of course with our LO now, we're going to have people come to us more rather than us go to them.

ScarlettDahlia · April 2014

I voted SS because the big holidays (Thanksgiving and Christmas), we typically get together with both of our families. For Easter this year, I decided that we're going to brunch with my family. DH was trying to talk his way out of it, but my birthday is two days after Easter, so I've decided that's where we're going and he's just going to have to deal with it.

I think this year, we might actually have to start switching off with Christmas and Thanksgiving. With DS, I think it's going to be tiring to have to go all over the place. And none of our families want to give in to the notion that as long as you're together around the holiday, it's still a holiday celebration. They all want Christmas Eve or Christmas Day together. But that just isn't happening anymore.

teacher0708 · April 2014

I voted split but we only split Christmas. My in laws live in the next province and are 8 hours away. So one year we stay here for Christmas the next year we go there. Otherwise we usually do holidays with my family as they are in the same city. If my in laws are here, we host both at our house

ChuggingWater · April 2014

Prior to ThanksgivingGate 2013, we primarily spent holidays with his families. Post ThankgivingGate2013, we will be doing e/o year.

OSUWifey09 · April 2014

We've always done holidays with my parents. Since H went into the military, he's missed a lot of the major holidays because of work or deployment training, so it's just been me and JJ with my parents. This year, he should be home, so we'll probably spend Thanksgiving with just us and Christmas with my family. He might want to do something with his family since his sister's having a baby in August, but who knows. We've never gotten along, so I don't know how we're going to manage it.

washyourhandsplease · April 2014

The holidays are usually spent at my house with family coming from both sides.

wifetomrb101 · April 2014

Depends on the holiday. We usually go to both on Thanksgiving, and split on Christmas. We don't usually do much for Easter. We'll go to DH's family, since we go there every other week on Sunday's after church for lunch and Easter happens to land on a Sunday we'd be there. Otherwise, Easter is usually just us at home.

LittleMommaBlueHen · April 2014

Holidays get split between families, but sometimes DHs work schedule prevents holidays with my family because they are an 8hour drive from home.

JulieBurrell · April 2014

Excited to see my sister and my new nephew this Easter!

moosebaby2011 · April 2014

We try to split, but it's hard because our families are all over the place. We're going to alternate Thanksgiving and Easter between DH's family and mine. Now that we have kids I don't really want to travel Christmas day (I want us to have our own family traditions) so we'll likely always see my mom and sister for Christmas since they live nearby.

Summer889 · April 2014

We do our best to be equal about it. Although since moving to another state (we're both originally from Michigan) we'll just be seeing them for Christmas for the foreseeable future.

Rebis58 · April 2014

I put SS. Unfortunately we live way across the province from both families, so often spend the holidays alone, not by choice. When we are finally able to move to a more central location, we'll alternate holidays with each family. Our families also unfortunately don't live close to each other, so we can't share holidays between families.

mommabird77 · April 2014

All holidays are spent with my family. His parents are JWs and do not celebrate holidays. Makes it so easy!

Shannahbee · April 2014

I took 'split the holidays' to mean Xmas at ILs one year, then at my family's the next, which isn't what we do... We just celebrate each holiday twice. Both families live in our City, so for example my family will do Easter dinner on Sunday night, then the ILs are doing a Monday brunch. We always just work it out. Xmas is the hardest to plan but we do Xmas Eve at one, and Xmas day at the other... For this holiday alone we alternate who gets what day every year.

LuGal623 · April 2014

SS - I got lucky in that DHs family and my family LOVE each other so we always do every holiday together and rotate between going to my parents or in-laws house. However Christmas Eve is usually when my Mom's family celebrates together and that is also DH's Grandma's birthday so we celebrate her birthday and dinner at her house and then rush off to my Aunt's for the rest of the night!

bensmommy518 · April 2014

I put SS. For most holidays (except christmas) we spend the actual holiday with my family because my huge extended family all gets together. We also do celebrate the holiday with DHs parents and sister but usually on another day because it is way easier to schedule with just the three of them than all my aunts, uncles, grandparents, and cousins. DH has extended family in the area, they just never get together for anything except funerals it seems. Christmas day though is usually spent at his parents house and we do christmas eve with my parents. My extended family then does a family Christmas usually in early January.

Galaxy8227 · April 2014

We do thanksgiving and Christmas Eve with my family, Christmas Day and Easter with his. It works for us

mommygrams0730 · April 2014

My first ss! Lol .

We are very lucky that our families live about 15 min away from each other. We are able to visit both sides for each holiday.

We usually spend more time with my side because whenever we spend the night we're at my parents or our family lake home.

Want a personalized experience?

Holidays: His Family or Yours?

Holidays: His Family or Yours? 159 votes

Re: Holidays: His Family or Yours?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards