Can we start another 'clueless FTM' question thread?

pepperedmoth · March 2014

@farmboyswife, thanks, that's a good idea! Her older is maybe 3.... Maybe I'll get a 3yo appropriate book or two, plus a cute onesie for LO?

Nickiechan · March 2014

FYI: Motherlove nipple cream is helping with chapped/cracked/healing nipples better then Lansinoh Lanolin imho....

Nickiechan · March 2014

FarmBoysWife said:

Nickiechan said:
FYI: Motherlove nipple cream is helping with chapped/cracked/healing nipples better then Lansinoh Lanolin imho....
Tbh: I got a different brand of lanolin and it's 100x better than the Lansinoh

What brand are you using?

pepperedmoth · March 2014

OK. I am FINALLY packing my hospital bag and I am CONVINCED that I am making a total hash of it. I am super disproportionately anxious about this. My list:

Clothing for me (I want to wear my own clothes):
-For labor, 2 ratty old t-shirts that could be cut off, 1 equally ratty pair of gaucho pants, maternity swim bottoms, 2 easy-off swim tops (for tub)
-For after, a nursing-friendly nightgown I don't mind getting blood on, a nursing tank, a nursing bra, a cardigan/bed jacket
-I will use the hospital socks and their mesh underwear
-Going home outfit for me (in case what I came in with is too icky)
-Flip-flops

Clothing For Baby:
-Two going-home outfits, one in NB and one in 0-3 (in case he's a chunker).
-Will use hospital diaps
-Car seat, obviously

Toiletries:
-Toothbrush & toothpaste for me and MH
-Shower pouf
-I will use hospital soap and towels (as long as I have my pouf and my toothpaste I am happy)
-Deodorant
-Lanolin and/or coconut oil for baby's butt/my nipples
-Comb
-Lip balm
-Glasses, glasses case, 2 pair "daily wear" contacts
-Hair ties and clip
-Arnica oil (midwife uses it on my perineum but I have to bring my own)
-My entire collection of cloth menstrual pads
-Big plastic bag for the dirties
(I don't wear makeup so that's not a concern)

Food items:
-Gatorade and oranges for labor (I am allowed to eat and drink)
-Celebratory Hefeweizen for after (champagne is allowed, so why not a Hefeweizen?)
-Granola bars in case kitchen is closed when I am done

Entertainment and miscellaneous:
-Ipod/CDs (hospital has both iPod docks and CD players in the rooms so I will have my pick)
-Phone with charger
-Noise-canceling headphones
-Baby journal
-Reading material
-Sleep mask
-Swim trunks for MH so he can get in the tub with me if needed
-Doula will bring all needed labor aids

......

I feel like I am forgetting something and I am driving myself crazy over it. Help?

jazzyexpo · March 2014

I like your list. I may use it as a guide for myself

All I would add is Chapstick and a camera, unless you'll use your phone.

Eta- clarification

theluckiest9 · March 2014

@pepperedmoth a blanket for LO in case you need to cover him in the car seat? We're also bringing a swaddler to take home ahead of time to introduce to the dogs. Baby socks, mittens or a hat (unless provided)?

The lactation consultants at our hospital like for us to bring nursing pillows if we plan on using one, so we're bringing that. Hm, that's all I got right now.

pepperedmoth · March 2014

Blanket! Aha! That would be good. I kinda lumped the hat/mittens/etc into the going-home outfit. They're packed. ETA: unless you think I need them for the hospital too? IIRC from my rotation on the maternity floor, they provided stuff for the hospital.....I am going to ask next weekend when I go to tour. Thanks for the thought!

I do plan to just use my phone as the camera (it's an iPhone 5) and lip balm is on the list. Right now I plan to just use normal pillows for nursing --- might buy a nursing pillow later.

MH is in charge of the Real Camera (he has a really nice vintage film camera that was his dad's in college) .... maybe I should write a "Things it is MH's Responsibility to Pack" list and hand it to him! That way I am also not in charge of his swim trunks.

SandiaLiz · March 2014

OK, I have another one and it seems reeeeeealy dumb but I am curious.
I know everyone says that when you are actually in labor you won't care at all, but I am still fairly horrified when I imagine a room full of people staring at my bits. I am normally very modest in how I dress, just because that is how I am comfortable. So I am worrying about the nakedness.
I plan to wear a hospital gown (let someone else do that laundry) and will obviously be naked from the waist down. But then I know my hospital does skin to skin immediately after birth and you try to nurse, which implies topless also.
So as the baby comes out does the nurse just start striping you? Do you spend the first 30 minutes with baby totally naked so they can finish up down there while you nurse?
And I get that this is silly, but thanks to anyone who will take pity and let me know what to expect.

pepperedmoth · March 2014

Good question! I was wondering about the skin-to-skin thing. I want LO on my chest right away, but don't understand why it has to be IMMEDIATELY skin-to-skin .... why not just pop him on my chest over my t-shirt/gown, towel him off, lay a blanket over us, and call it good? We could cuddle for a bit then I could change in a more leisurely fashion.

I get that skin-to-skin is good for temp regulation, but surely for a term infant it isn't so critical they have to be all STRIP HER NOOOOOOWWW!!

SomersIsles · March 2014

I always hear about the routine of baby wakes, feed baby, burp baby, change baby.

If they fall asleep while eating wouldn't the burping and changing wake them up and make them, potentially, miserable? I understand the burping probably HAS TO take place... But couldn't I change before starting to feed to get that distraction done with?

lb1117 · March 2014

SomersIsles said:

I always hear about the routine of baby wakes, feed baby, burp baby, change baby. If they fall asleep while eating wouldn't the burping and changing wake them up and make them, potentially, miserable? I understand the burping probably HAS TO take place... But couldn't I change before starting to feed to get that distraction done with?

If he's not crying for food, I change first. If he is crying for food, he's so content after feeding that he either stays asleep or is just quiet. He sleeps through the burping at the end, not not the one half way through the bottle. I don't find getting him back to sleep a problem.

ProudMommy030614 · March 2014

pepperedmoth said:
Good question! I was wondering about the skin-to-skin thing. I want LO on my chest right away, but don't understand why it has to be IMMEDIATELY skin-to-skin .... why not just pop him on my chest over my t-shirt/gown, towel him off, lay a blanket over us, and call it good? We could cuddle for a bit then I could change in a more leisurely fashion.

I get that skin-to-skin is good for temp regulation, but surely for a term infant it isn't so critical they have to be all STRIP HER NOOOOOOWWW!!

The skin to skin is also so the LO can get your scent from your skin. I would also include an extra shirt for H if he plans on catching LO! H caught the baby placed baby on my chest and his shirt was a mess! I am so hoping for that experience again. Our awesome nurse got pics of it and they are among some of my favs ever.

Missfunball · March 2014

SandiaLiz said:
OK, I have another one and it seems reeeeeealy dumb but I am curious.
I know everyone says that when you are actually in labor you won't care at all, but I am still fairly horrified when I imagine a room full of people staring at my bits. I am normally very modest in how I dress, just because that is how I am comfortable. So I am worrying about the nakedness.
I plan to wear a hospital gown (let someone else do that laundry) and will obviously be naked from the waist down. But then I know my hospital does skin to skin immediately after birth and you try to nurse, which implies topless also.
So as the baby comes out does the nurse just start striping you? Do you spend the first 30 minutes with baby totally naked so they can finish up down there while you nurse?
And I get that this is silly, but thanks to anyone who will take pity and let me know what to expect.

I was still wearing my shirt but had upper contact and held him, it was...just right. I dunno. I wish I had more time of the ASAP but they had to take him away. So yes, beneficial not critical but you'll want to hold your LOright away...you just will.

amdecker1016 · March 2014

Okay question--when BF mia gets super lazy and once she is asleep she is out. She is very hard to wake if she has a nipple or paci in.

Any suggestions on how to keep her awake? We've tried lightly scratching her head, playing with her hands/feet, doing a "V" down the sides of her spine with our hand, and undressing.
They all only work for like a minute or two.

[Deleted User] · March 2014

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amdecker1016 · March 2014

TallAsh said:

amymheidecker said:
Okay question--when BF mia gets super lazy and once she is asleep she is out. She is very hard to wake if she has a nipple or paci in.

Any suggestions on how to keep her awake? We've tried lightly scratching her head, playing with her hands/feet, doing a "V" down the sides of her spine with our hand, and undressing.
They all only work for like a minute or two.
I sometimes used to do a diaper change in the middle of a BFing session. The cold air would rouse baby enough to get a good feeding session in.

Both of my girls were a bit jaundiced, which also made them sleepier. There were times with my second where I would use my free hand to lightly scratch bottom of her foot--not enough to hurt, just enough to bug her a little and keep her awake long enough to eat.

Thanks!

SouthernMs · March 2014

@pepperedmoth

Hefeweizen and granola bars?! That sounds like a party. Great list-- it reminded me of a couple things I should add to my bag!

jennybean80 · March 2014

@sandializ and @pepperedmoth
True skin-to-skin helps baby adjust to their new environment, but if you are wearing a gown/shirt they can just tuck baby underneath it against your skin, and they will always cover you both up with blankets since baby will be wet and needs to be kept warm. So while baby can be right on your skin, you don't need to be exposed to everyone!

SandiaLiz · March 2014

Jenstwins said:

@sandializ and @pepperedmoth True skin-to-skin helps baby adjust to their new environment, but if you are wearing a gown/shirt they can just tuck baby underneath it against your skin, and they will always cover you both up with blankets since baby will be wet and needs to be kept warm. So while baby can be right on your skin, you don't need to be exposed to everyone!

Thanks! I know in the moment I won't care about anything but my new little family but that makes me feel better! I will gladly hang out naked in a room full of strangers for this kid if I have to, but a blanket would be nice. :-)

sebullows · March 2014

WisconsinCheese12 said:
Has anyone used these... They sort of freak me out like I'm putting the lo under a plastic bag or something

I've never seen them here in the US, but they were very popular in England growing up. My mom had one for my little brother and she used it all the time. We walked about a mile to school each day, which was the norm, so just about everyone used them when it was raining.. Which was quite a lot

SomersIsles · March 2014

Anybody have experience flying with a newborn? My mother (ugh) is hoping we can fly to her place in Florida with the baby so we all drive back to MA.... Sounds like a nightmare AND a dumb idea.... Yes? No?

ntdane · March 2014

WisconsinCheese12 said:
Has anyone used these... They sort of freak me out like I'm putting the lo under a plastic bag or something

I used one with DS. Ours had little vents in the side so there is some air circulation in there. It worked well when DH was gone and I had to walk the dog and couldn't leave DS alone in the apartment.

ProudMommy030614 · March 2014

WisconsinCheese12 said:
Has anyone used these... They sort of freak me out like I'm putting the lo under a plastic bag or something

We use one like this and one that's just a net to keep bugs away. In Florida you always either have bugs or rain and both or ours I kept in a little bag under the stroller. They were great to have.

jennybean80 · March 2014

SomersIsles said:
Anybody have experience flying with a newborn? My mother (ugh) is hoping we can fly to her place in Florida with the baby so we all drive back to MA.... Sounds like a nightmare AND a dumb idea.... Yes? No?

We flew with DS at about 6 weeks of age corrected and it was fine. It's a good idea to nurse or bottle them during take-off and landing to help their ears equalize.

AriaAmante143 · March 2014

Here's a sleep question:

Last night we put Brooklyn in her Halo sleep sack and she slept perfectly on her back. Tonight she's in a footed sleeper and I CANNOT keep her on her back. The second I lay her down
she rolls to her side and stays there. If I try to roll her back she fusses. Now I'm afraid to sleep, worried she'll roll all the way onto her stomach.

Can they sleep on their sides? Should I just keep swaddling her at night? She's 5 days old, I thought they were basically potted plants at this point!!

legallyginger · March 2014

amymheidecker said:
Okay question--when BF mia gets super lazy and once she is asleep she is out. She is very hard to wake if she has a nipple or paci in.

Any suggestions on how to keep her awake? We've tried lightly scratching her head, playing with her hands/feet, doing a "V" down the sides of her spine with our hand, and undressing.
They all only work for like a minute or two.

@amyheidecker

We've been having trouble with this as well. The LC at the hospital used a cloth wipe dipped in cool water and gently rubbed the top of his head with it to keep him alert, it seemed to help.

sparklr10 · March 2014

What is cluster feeding? I keep seeing moms post about it....

lb1117 · March 2014

DisneyAddict1 said:

AriaAmante143 said:

Here's a sleep question: Last night we put Brooklyn in her Halo sleep sack and she slept perfectly on her back. Tonight she's in a footed sleeper and I CANNOT keep her on her back. The second I lay her down she rolls to her side and stays there. If I try to roll her back she fusses. Now I'm afraid to sleep, worried she'll roll all the way onto her stomach. Can they sleep on their sides? Should I just keep swaddling her at night? She's 5 days old, I thought they were basically potted plants at this point!!

Side sleeping is okay. We used a wedge with DS1 to make sure he didn't roll all the way over. They aren't really recommended anymore though so I would say if you go that route use it at your own discretion.

I personally would just keep swaddling whenever she sleeps if that works to keep her sleeping on her back. At 5 days old you aren't creating habits, it's all about comfort still.

I swaddle and he still rolls to his side. He's been doing this since we first brought him home. He gets swaddled, a paci, put on his back. If he happens to roll to be comfy, so be it.

sparklr10 · March 2014

DisneyAddict1 said:

sparklr10 said:

What is cluster feeding? I keep seeing moms post about it....

Cluster feeding is when LOs go from feeding every couple hours to constant or several feedings in a short period of time. This link talks about it more in depth.

https://kellymom.com/parenting/parenting-faq/fussy-evening/

Thanks!

theluckiest9 · March 2014

WisconsinCheese12 said:
I got this in an email from the hospital compiled news letter...related to early labor signs and suggestions. Any fact to it?

"Urinate often to be as comfortable as possible, and because a full bladder can slow the descent of your baby’s head."

Our L&D class teacher told us that they like for moms to keep their bladders emptied during labor. I can't remember the reasoning though..

benevolentforce · March 2014

theluckiest9 said:

WisconsinCheese12 said:
I got this in an email from the hospital compiled news letter...related to early labor signs and suggestions. Any fact to it?

"Urinate often to be as comfortable as possible, and because a full bladder can slow the descent of your baby’s head."
Our L&D class teacher told us that they like for moms to keep their bladders emptied during labor. I can't remember the reasoning though..

Yes! My MW told me this as well. Basically, blocked bowels, full bladder, or too much relaxation (e.g. a relaxing shower or bath during early labour) can cause it to stall (so she said). Also, dehydration. So, drink lots, pee lots and keep moving as possible.

amdecker1016 · March 2014

Q for BF moms:
When your LO is nursing i get like so sleepy. Like even though i am wide awake before the minute my hormones start going to get the nursing session going, i can barely hold my eyes open!

Is this normal? Does it happen to anyone else?

SomersIsles · March 2014

Affect I think, that's the verb. Effect is like "end result". .... I think..... lol

jennybean80 · March 2014

WisconsinCheese12 said:
I got this in an email from the hospital compiled news letter...related to early labor signs and suggestions. Any fact to it?

"Urinate often to be as comfortable as possible, and because a full bladder can slow the descent of your baby’s head."

Yep. The bladder sits right in front of and below the uterus so if it's really full it can block baby's descent. That's way generally if you have an epidural you get a catheter too.

By the time you are pushing, baby's head is lower than the bladder, and will actually pinch off the urethra so you won't pee while pushing!

eta clarification

SandiaLiz · March 2014

Ok, I lied... I have more stupid questions. I think I might be going for the most clueless questions crown! Thanks for your help everyone!

What is a timeable contraction? Or actually, how could a contraction not be timable? Does this just refer to contractions that are too short or sporadic to bother timing? Because I feel like I could time any contraction you thrown at me, but people say that all the time so maybe I am missing something?

jennybean80 · March 2014

Laura8388 said:

You're so handy to have around!

I was not nice to the nurses who out my catheter in when I started bleeding and I STILL feel bad about it

Thanks Laura! I'm just glad I can be helpful!

Also don't worry about being mean to the catheter nurse, I'm sure she understood! I cussed out every nurse who started an IV on me (I had at least 5) and warned them that I would ahead of time ;-)

amholley1 · March 2014

So I have started to notice that Junes hands and feet are starting to get peely. It reminds me of when your skin peels when you get a sunburn. Is this happening to anyone else?

theluckiest9 · March 2014

I think you're automatically cath'd. I'm pretty sure that once the epi is in you can't get up seeing as you're numb. I don't know that you would be aware of the urge to pee to even be able to ask for a bed pan, either.

amholley1 · March 2014

I had an epi and a cath. When they put
It in, the nurse was like "wow looks like you had to go" as I filled it up. I had NO idea I even peed. They kept emptying it throughout the night. I can't imagine not having it, I would have peed the bed. Oh and I was still able to move my legs, it was just difficult because they felt extra heavy

jennybean80 · March 2014

Technically you don't HAVE to have a catheter, but if you dot you need to be able to pee every hour at least 50mL either on a bed pan or by walking to the BR. I've had a few moms try to go without over the years, but nobody has ever met the criteria to keep cath-free and just end up getting one later. The all also find it a PITA to have to try each hour…

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