I'll bite. I think I have an actual UO today. So my UO is that I don't understand all the drama on the board every time a newbie/lurker decides to post something. Yes, I like the sense of community on the board and that I recognize many ladies here. But I'm sure there are plenty of other regulars that I don't recognize and I woudlnt know if they're first time posters or usual posters. After all there are hundreds of viewers on the board and I certainly cannot name a hundred bumpies. And if a newbie has something constructive to say, why shouldn't they chime in any time they see fit. I don't really see the point of making them feel bad for participating by replying to their posts with comments such as "and you are?" Alright, I'm ready for the flaming now.
GBCB!!!
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****/board/50/14
I think shows like The Biggest Loser perpetuate eating disorders and unhealthy eating/exercising habits.
For example, this Rachel chick, apparently she lost too much weight and looks unhealthy, but the objective of the show is to lose the most weight by the end to win the prize.
I, at least this point in time, HATE snow days. I was counting on May 23 being the last day of school - a few days before my sister gets married and a week before my due date. I had a bowel resection 2 years ago that caused me to use up every single one of my sick days that I had banked. Now, I'm in the process of trying to rebuild those days, so I don't have many paid days to take. I was hoping (as long as everything is going well) that I wouldn't have to use any of my own days prior to delivery. Now, we are going to June 2 so I definitely have to use some of my time.
I know that I'm lucky enough to be a teacher AND be due so close to summer break, but I just worry with my other health conditions that I will have to leave earlier, and run the risk of running out of paid days like I did with my last surgery.
I'll bite. I think I have an actual UO today. So my UO is that I don't understand all the drama on the board every time a newbie/lurker decides to post something. Yes, I like the sense of community on the board and that I recognize many ladies here. But I'm sure there are plenty of other regulars that I don't recognize and I woudlnt know if they're first time posters or usual posters. After all there are hundreds of viewers on the board and I certainly cannot name a hundred bumpies. And if a newbie has something constructive to say, why shouldn't they chime in any time they see fit. I don't really see the point of making them feel bad for participating by replying to their posts with comments such as "and you are?" Alright, I'm ready for the flaming now.
I don't really see the "and you are?" comments on posts by newbs or lurkers, aside from yesterday. In that instance we already knew what she had said on another board.
I'll bite. I think I have an actual UO today. So my UO is that I don't understand all the drama on the board every time a newbie/lurker decides to post something. Yes, I like the sense of community on the board and that I recognize many ladies here. But I'm sure there are plenty of other regulars that I don't recognize and I woudlnt know if they're first time posters or usual posters. After all there are hundreds of viewers on the board and I certainly cannot name a hundred bumpies. And if a newbie has something constructive to say, why shouldn't they chime in any time they see fit. I don't really see the point of making them feel bad for participating by replying to their posts with comments such as "and you are?" Alright, I'm ready for the flaming now.
I think the problem is more when they come out-of-nowhere and act like jerks.
But I have seen a couple of instances where I thought things went a little too far. I can't even recall anything specific, but sometimes it does seem like everyone wants to add their two cents of what a jerk someone is being and it turns into pages and pages of everyone just saying the same thing over-and-over again. I guess my "UO" is more to the end of sometimes I think those type threads turn into beating a dead horse. But, overall, I actually think this board is welcoming of newbies and I also think that usually when something is flamed, it is something legitimately flame-worthy...usually.
IF DX: DOR & Fragile X pre-mutation carrier
2011: FSH 13.3 & E 99; AMH 0.54
2nd FSH 6.2 E 40's AFC: 8
BFP from Clomid/IUI ~ Pre-e and IUGR during pregnancy ~ DS born 9/4/12
Feb./March 2013: AMH less than 0.16 (undectable) and AFC = 4; BFP from supps ~ DS#2 due May 2014
But if someone comes here with very few posts and bashes another board saying they were bullies who liked drama and she'd rather hang out with us, why on earth do we have to hold hands and sing kumbaya?
Because we're here to be supportive, Silly Billy. Duh.
I HATE Biggest Loser with a purple passion. I think the show is the biggest lie about WL that has been sold to a desperate demographic, and seeing the "winner" go from one end of the unhealthy weight spectrum to the other only cements my opinion that this show has no interest in healthy lifestyles, but merely ratings at the expense of their contestant's health.
I've read so many horrible stories about the reality of what goes on at the ranch; from 12 hr workouts to encouraging dehydrating and "cleansing" to achieve bigger results at weight ins.
It sets an unrealistic standard of weight loss for viewers who want to change their own lives and sets up these contestants for multiple eating disorders and major regains after the cameras stop rolling and they go back to their normal lives.
I think the reactions from Bob and Jillian at the reveal say it best. (FYI, I didnt watch the finale, but saw the headlines about the results and found the clip on youtube):
she went down to an 18 BMI, which is considered underweight. for perspective, Milan and New York fashion week no longer allow models below an 18.5 BMI because they are considered too unhealthy.
My UO is actually something I am completely guilty of myself. I dislike when someone is having a discussion about something--usually something medical--and they say: "Well, I did this and nothing bad happened" or "Me and all my friends did XYZ and..." And I'm not talking about in the situation where someone asks for personal experiences, but in the instance of where someone throws their personal experience into the mix to try to win an argument and thinks it proves some great point when really it doesn't prove anything.
The best example I can think of us is: "I didn't vax my kids and none of them got any of those diseases/illnesses." Not really helpful to the discussion. Your single experience doesn't really add much to the discussion or prove anything.
IF DX: DOR & Fragile X pre-mutation carrier
2011: FSH 13.3 & E 99; AMH 0.54
2nd FSH 6.2 E 40's AFC: 8
BFP from Clomid/IUI ~ Pre-e and IUGR during pregnancy ~ DS born 9/4/12
Feb./March 2013: AMH less than 0.16 (undectable) and AFC = 4; BFP from supps ~ DS#2 due May 2014
My UO is actually something I am completely guilty of myself. I dislike when someone is having a discussion about something--usually something medical--and they say: "Well, I did this and nothing bad happened" or "Me and all my friends did XYZ and..." And I'm not talking about in the situation where someone asks for personal experiences, but in the instance of where someone throws their personal experience into the mix to try to win an argument and thinks it proves some great point when really it doesn't prove anything.
The best example I can think of us is: "I didn't vax my kids and none of them got any of those diseases/illnesses." Not really helpful to the discussion. Your single experience doesn't really add much to the discussion or prove anything.
Agreed. I'm sure I've done it unintentionally, but it irks me whenever I see it.
@lica001 piggy backing off of PPs, the only times I've really seen the "and you are?" comments are when strangers come in and White Knight. I see plenty of newbs/lurkers commenting on things all the time, and their comments are received just like any one else's. In fact, the majority of names I see these days are ones I don't recognize.
I think shows like The Biggest Loser perpetuate eating disorders and unhealthy eating/exercising habits.
For example, this Rachel chick, apparently she lost too much weight and looks unhealthy, but the objective of the show is to lose the most weight by the end to win the prize.
ha! you posted while I was typing out my giant spiel about the same thing! glad I'm not the only one not on board with it!
My UO for today, and I'm really sad that I feel like it's an UO. I hate it when people spend so much time on their damn phones and "researching" fb that they don't even know what's going on in real life with people that should matter to them. My MIL is so worried about what someone else's kid is doing in the town she grew up in that she A completely ignored DH when he was trying to have a conversation with her about a major life decision and B f'in forgot that he was out of town to Texas this week. She spends every damn minute on her phone and I really wish someone would say something to her, but it's not going to be me. End rant.
I'll bite. I think I have an actual UO today. So my UO is that I don't understand all the drama on the board every time a newbie/lurker decides to post something. Yes, I like the sense of community on the board and that I recognize many ladies here. But I'm sure there are plenty of other regulars that I don't recognize and I woudlnt know if they're first time posters or usual posters. After all there are hundreds of viewers on the board and I certainly cannot name a hundred bumpies. And if a newbie has something constructive to say, why shouldn't they chime in any time they see fit. I don't really see the point of making them feel bad for participating by replying to their posts with comments such as "and you are?" Alright, I'm ready for the flaming now.
You can't withdraw money from the bank if you didn't first put the money in the bank. If you want support and squeeees and cinnamon buns, then you must first give support and squeeees and cinnamon buns. We've been here for months, they've been here for 2 seconds. Membership is free and optional, but participation and respect is mandatory.
It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s that I don’t know you. Stranger Danger.
I think shows like The Biggest Loser perpetuate eating disorders and unhealthy eating/exercising habits.
For example, this Rachel chick, apparently she lost too much weight and looks unhealthy, but the objective of the show is to lose the most weight by the end to win the prize.
ha! you posted while I was typing out my giant spiel about the same thing! glad I'm not the only one not on board with it!
But you articulated it so much better than I did. Well said.
I can't stand when people compare relationships that just can't be compared. Example, a couple months ago I kept hearing about Giuliana Rancic and how "I put my marriage first and my kid second....Bill was here first". I just don't see how that's even relavent. I have a totally different and separate relationship with my son than with my husband.
My FIL can't seem to get this concept either. When he remarried to my SMIL suddenly he couldn't be close to his kids anymore and she was the only one that mattered...we don't even talk to him anymore and DS is named after him.
I have one this week. I hate the phrase "first world problems." I understand that we (I) complain about things that seem stupid compared to being homeless and hungry, but when they are dismissed as "first world problems" it makes me livid. There will always be someone who has it worse than you, but that doesn't mean that your problems are not real. My problems may be "first world problems" but so fucking what!
BFP #1 7.16.13 | EDD 3.27.14 | MC 7.29.13
BFP #2 8.28.13 | EDD 5.5.14 | Simon Francis, Due Date Baby!
I can't stand when people compare relationships that just can't be compared. Example, a couple months ago I kept hearing about Giuliana Rancic and how "I put my marriage first and my kid second....Bill was here first". I just don't see how that's even relavent. I have a totally different and separate relationship with my son than with my husband.
The statement that "my H comes first, kids second" bothers me. I'm totally the opposite, my kids come first, my H second. That's not saying I don't care or put effort into my marriage, but my kids will always be my kids, my H might not always be my H. Sorrynotsorry, H!
I can't stand when people compare relationships that just can't be compared. Example, a couple months ago I kept hearing about Giuliana Rancic and how "I put my marriage first and my kid second....Bill was here first". I just don't see how that's even relavent. I have a totally different and separate relationship with my son than with my husband.
The statement that "my H comes first, kids second" bothers me. I'm totally the opposite, my kids come first, my H second. That's not saying I don't care or put effort into my marriage, but my kids will always be my kids, my H might not always be my H. Sorrynotsorry, H!
Yes! This is totally what I was getting at! My H doesn't depend on me for his everyday well being (at least I hope not, can't stand a stage 5 clinger) but my babies do! You can't say that comes second for anything, and in the instance that there is a choice...I choose my kids too. I know DH would choose them too and I wouldn't want it any different
I have one this week. I hate the phrase "first world problems." I understand that we (I) complain about things that seem stupid compared to being homeless and hungry, but when they are dismissed as "first world problems" it makes me livid. There will always be someone who has it worse than you, but that doesn't mean that your problems are not real. My problems may be "first world problems" but so fucking what!
I only use that phrase for something extremely trivial. Like FWP: I didn't win the 1 carat diamond give away. I definitely don't need a 1 carat diamond and don't even know what I would do with it but I still wanted to win dammit!
Congrats to my GP Sister from another mister Bruinsbabe!!
My husband and I both have a respectful understanding that our children will always come first. If anything it makes my marriage healthier because I am constantly thinking "Don't say that, you don't want Asher to hear you talking to his daddy that way" Maybe that thinking is messed up, but my H are an are partners and raising a family, but our ultimate goals is raising that family well and that often means putting our kids first, above ourselves and above each other. Asher Ben is the best thing I have ever done with my life, I have no shame. My husband makes me happy, but not in the way my son does. It isn't a reflection on my husband or my love for him, it is a reflection of my love for my son though and a reflection of what I feel is the importance of motherhood.
to put it bluntly, if Asher and Phill were both hanging off a cliff and I could only save one of them, I'd save Asher. And that is exactly what Phill would want me to do and would do himself if the situation was flopped.
I guess my UO is that I saw the biggest loser winner and only thought "wow she looks great!" I don't watch the show but saw all the chatter and pictures on Twitter. My other UO is that body shaming is still body shaming whether someone is fat or thin. I think it's wrong. Whether she is "healthy" is between her and her doctor. I hate reading all these comments about her size. Because she's thin people are allowed to speculate? It's not right to comment on other people's bodies no matter what size they are.
I have one this week. I hate the phrase "first world problems." I understand that we (I) complain about things that seem stupid compared to being homeless and hungry, but when they are dismissed as "first world problems" it makes me livid. There will always be someone who has it worse than you, but that doesn't mean that your problems are not real. My problems may be "first world problems" but so fucking what!
I only use that phrase for something extremely trivial. Like FWP: I didn't win the 1 carat diamond give away. I definitely don't need a 1 carat diamond and don't even know what I would do with it but I still wanted to win dammit!
Yes. I feel like "first world problems" is over used now, and people basically apply it to every problem now to try to be funny, but it's not. When it first started to be a thing it was more for funny, unimportant things that aren't really problems in any part of the world, just annoyances of modern living.
Examples:
"My new refrigerator takes too long to make crushed ice" or "I bought a new scarf but it's unseasonably warm today"
My husband and I both have a respectful understanding that our children will always come first. If anything it makes my marriage healthier because I am constantly thinking "Don't say that, you don't want Asher to hear you talking to his daddy that way" Maybe that thinking is messed up, but my H are an are partners and raising a family, but our ultimate goals is raising that family well and that often means putting our kids first, above ourselves and above each other. Asher Ben is the best thing I have ever done with my life, I have no shame. My husband makes me happy, but not in the way my son does. It isn't a reflection on my husband or my love for him, it is a reflection of my love for my son though and a reflection of what I feel is the importance of motherhood.
to put it bluntly, if Asher and Phill were both hanging off a cliff and I could only save one of them, I'd save Asher. And that is exactly what Phill would want me to do and would do himself if the situation was flopped.
I need a day to walk around the MFA (Museum of Fine Arts) It is really soul therapy for me and I did it all the time before I had a child.
What bothers me is that since having Asher, I've only gone twice. TWICE. This is because I refuse to take him with me. It bothers me that other parents bring 1 year olds and let them run all over the place and touch priceless art and make tons of noise.
One of my favorite things to do these is eat lunch in the cafe cove and listen to period era live music. I time my visits perfectly for this as it only happens like once a month.
The last time I was there, a mom with a 2 year old and 1 year old sat beside me and let her kids fight the whole time.
I get it. I do. I've taken my ill behaved child to lunch and dinner, I'm sure I've pissed people off. I just feel like the MFA, the symphony, places like that....they aren't toddler friendly places. I won't bring Asher until he is old enough to learn to respect the environment and can have teachable moments.
It always comes back around to cinnamon buns, doesn't it. Here's a question: has anyone put cookie butter on cinnamon buns yet? Lmk.
I contemplated the bacon cinnamon roll thing, but my husband balked.
you have to do it, how else can I live through someone else?
I've had them before, they are everything you've dreamed about....there is an Austrian restaurant in town that serves them on their rotating dessert menu. The restaurant's motto is "Where bacon is an herb" so it is pretty much an awesome place to eat.
I agree that the biggest loser winner looks a little gaunt. I don't watch the show, but I read that she is a former champion swimmer. So, I'm just giving her the benefit of the doubt that she has a naturally small frame.
My UO: I generally don't care for newborn photo sessions. I get that you want to have pictures of your kid, but I think some of the more popular "stagings" are weird--baby in a giant basket? Wrapped in some kind of gauze? On the ground in a forest? On top of a typewriter? This is strange to me...
My UO: I generally don't care for newborn photo sessions. I get that you want to have pictures of your kid, but I think some of the more popular "stagings" are weird--baby in a giant basket? Wrapped in some kind of gauze? On the ground in a forest? On top of a typewriter? This is strange to me...
sure sure But I will have a picture of my little girl in her Harry Potter little butt dipe, some glasses and a lightening bolt on top of and next to the entire Harry Potter series. It has to happen. lol.
In regards to the "we are so mean to newbies"..no we are not. Here's the thing-
if you say something stupid, racist, rude..whatever, we will call you out. AND it doesn't matter if you've been here since August or yesterday. The latest GBCB was by a fairly regular poster. I recognized her. BUT she said something unacceptable and then basically said "sorrynotsorry." She got called out.
I don't mind if new people come in. I think it's great. BUT don't come in, AW yourself then say we're mean. Don't come in if you're leaving a group for being mean when you did something stupid (like tell a woman who just had a late loss to go fuck herself). That's not going to go over well.
You give support, you get support. That's how it has been since the beginning of time. As stupid as it sounds, there are ladies on here I consider friends. You mess with my friends, I'm not nice. We are actually not very bitchy at all. We've had very civil debates on controversial topics. But when you come in here saying the r-word, telling us you smack your 6 month old because the bible, or other stupidity that has occurred, we'll let you know you fucked up.
I agree, the last GBCB was a perfect example of it not being about newb, but about respect and community.
My UO: I generally don't care for newborn photo sessions. I get that you want to have pictures of your kid, but I think some of the more popular "stagings" are weird--baby in a giant basket? Wrapped in some kind of gauze? On the ground in a forest? On top of a typewriter? This is strange to me...
sure sure But I will have a picture of my little girl in her Harry Potter little butt dipe, some glasses and a lightening bolt on top of and next to the entire Harry Potter series. It has to happen. lol.
Re: UO*
For example, this Rachel chick, apparently she lost too much weight and looks unhealthy, but the objective of the show is to lose the most weight by the end to win the prize.
I know that I'm lucky enough to be a teacher AND be due so close to summer break, but I just worry with my other health conditions that I will have to leave earlier, and run the risk of running out of paid days like I did with my last surgery.
Happy Endings
But I have seen a couple of instances where I thought things went a little too far. I can't even recall anything specific, but sometimes it does seem like everyone wants to add their two cents of what a jerk someone is being and it turns into pages and pages of everyone just saying the same thing over-and-over again. I guess my "UO" is more to the end of sometimes I think those type threads turn into beating a dead horse. But, overall, I actually think this board is welcoming of newbies and I also think that usually when something is flamed, it is something legitimately flame-worthy...usually.
2011: FSH 13.3 & E 99; AMH 0.54 2nd FSH 6.2 E 40's AFC: 8
BFP from Clomid/IUI ~ Pre-e and IUGR during pregnancy ~ DS born 9/4/12
Feb./March 2013: AMH less than 0.16 (undectable) and AFC = 4;
BFP from supps ~ DS#2 due May 2014
May 2014 January Siggy Challenge:
I've read so many horrible stories about the reality of what goes on at the ranch; from 12 hr workouts to encouraging dehydrating and "cleansing" to achieve bigger results at weight ins.
I think the reactions from Bob and Jillian at the reveal say it best. (FYI, I didnt watch the finale, but saw the headlines about the results and found the clip on youtube):
Edited because spelling is hard.
Except when someone comes over acting like and asshole. I don't actually see a lot of "And you are?????" Not on this board.
The best example I can think of us is: "I didn't vax my kids and none of them got any of those diseases/illnesses." Not really helpful to the discussion. Your single experience doesn't really add much to the discussion or prove anything.
2011: FSH 13.3 & E 99; AMH 0.54 2nd FSH 6.2 E 40's AFC: 8
BFP from Clomid/IUI ~ Pre-e and IUGR during pregnancy ~ DS born 9/4/12
Feb./March 2013: AMH less than 0.16 (undectable) and AFC = 4;
BFP from supps ~ DS#2 due May 2014
May 2014 January Siggy Challenge:
It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s that I don’t know you. Stranger Danger.
*salivating*
But you articulated it so much better than I did. Well said.
Yes! This is totally what I was getting at! My H doesn't depend on me for his everyday well being (at least I hope not, can't stand a stage 5 clinger) but my babies do! You can't say that comes second for anything, and in the instance that there is a choice...I choose my kids too. I know DH would choose them too and I wouldn't want it any different
to put it bluntly, if Asher and Phill were both hanging off a cliff and I could only save one of them, I'd save Asher. And that is exactly what Phill would want me to do and would do himself if the situation was flopped.
Fabulous. Report back with pictures.
What bothers me is that since having Asher, I've only gone twice. TWICE. This is because I refuse to take him with me. It bothers me that other parents bring 1 year olds and let them run all over the place and touch priceless art and make tons of noise.
One of my favorite things to do these is eat lunch in the cafe cove and listen to period era live music. I time my visits perfectly for this as it only happens like once a month.
The last time I was there, a mom with a 2 year old and 1 year old sat beside me and let her kids fight the whole time.
I get it. I do. I've taken my ill behaved child to lunch and dinner, I'm sure I've pissed people off. I just feel like the MFA, the symphony, places like that....they aren't toddler friendly places. I won't bring Asher until he is old enough to learn to respect the environment and can have teachable moments.
Nora - 10.26.12
Henry - 5.9.14