Who do you want there with you during birth?

Lo91b · January 2014

...Is it wrong for me to only want my DH with me? My family lives out of state...and for some reason I can't imagine me having more than him there at the time. Of course, I want them to come visit afterward!!

cakebatter27 · January 2014

No that's normal. I want DH and my sister. DH will nix that though.

PenelopeSnuz77 · January 2014

Just DH, midwife, doula if we decide to go that route.

I don't need an audience staring at my vagina.

ashcross · January 2014

I just want my husband. Our family all lives out of state too but even if they lived in state, I don't a bunch of people even family in the room.

cuntasaurusrex · January 2014

Just my husband. Our parents will be allowed in during labor if they want, but they'll be kicked out at push time and will be given a key to our house (literally 6 minutes away) if they want to go rest/clean/cook us food there.

jensavicci · January 2014

My DW, midwife, her assistant and eventually, the actual baby. I do not need others seeing my vagina being ripped open and mangled.

HJakes78 · January 2014

aliletz said:
Just my husband. Our parents will be allowed in during labor if they want, but they'll be kicked out at push time and will be given a key to our house (literally 6 minutes away) if they want to go rest/clean/cook us food there.

Same here... Push time is only husband and I. The in laws are not liking that much but I am not budging!!!

bchildrn · January 2014

Only DH and my mom. Poor DH is terrified so I think having my mom there will comfort us both. I already told him he can stay at the head of the bed and look at me and nothing else. Had to put my foot down about having his mom there. I told him it would just make me anxious, her and I tend to argue a lot, he objected at first but I think he understands.

mamaloaf · January 2014

Just DH during the 'show.' I'm dreading having to break the news to my mother (an OB). She's been good about not acting like she is my doctor, but I'm still afraid it's going to hurt her feelings.

MstoMrstoMom851214 · January 2014

Debating between just my husband and my husband and my mom...I'm going to leave it up to my husband I think. I will definitely want my mom there during my labor if it's long (I'm 28 and still want her when I'm in a lot of pain)...plus she's very knowledgeable about medical things. But it will probably just be my husband and I during the pushing stage. We'll see how I feel when the time comes!.

b55c · January 2014

with dd, i thought i only wanted my husband with me. but my sil turned out to be such a comfort during my looonnnggg labor that she kind of turned into my doula. that was such a help. the thought of having anyone else in there with me makes me ill.

eortman · January 2014

Just DH, I have no interest in having anyone else present.

Ylvelill · January 2014

Will probably end up with a CS but if not then only my husband. In fact I am not sure if I want people to come to the hospital. I think I would be fine with not seeing anyone for the first week

tealowl · January 2014

Just S/O. I would love to be able to afford a doula and have one there. If I get a tax return this year, I'm so getting one.

I don't want anyone even in the waiting room waiting either. You can wait at home. Nobody is getting up to the minute play by plays. You'll know when I'm in labor and you'll know when the baby is here. Give me 24 hours alone with my baby. The day I get d/c is when you can stop at the hospital and see us.

I had people swarming my room after DD was born. Aunts, uncles, etc..my alcoholic grandfather somehow showed up when I still had blood on my gown and bedsheets. This shit ain't happening again.

earichar23 · January 2014

DH and my mom. I suspect DH will be upset that I don't want his mom in there but since it's my vagina on display I'm putting my foot down!

katnipeverclean · January 2014

Just DH, my OB and about ten members of the surgical team.

lovely2999 · January 2014

My hospital has a rule that only two people can be in the room (other than doctor and nurses) at a time. Only people I would want there is DH, my mom and my sister. With DD, DH and my mom was there. My sister missed the birth by a few minutes. But DH had to leave the room so she could come in. I'm hoping she comes earlier this time and they won't be so strict about it. I don't see the big deal. Its just one other person, she wouldn't be in the way and the room is big enough.

hope1017 · January 2014

Just my husband here. I haven't told anyone else except of course my husband. I thought he would oppose of just us being there since his family is extremely excited about the baby (first grandchild in his family) but he just keeps telling me "it's up to you." The hard part is telling his family, maybe they won't even be here on time since they live in another state (5 hours away). Also in case my husband is overseas, my mom will be the only one there and a birth photographer.

kmawb · January 2014

Just my DH, the OB/doc, and the nurses. That's all I had last time (until the c/s that is) and that's all I want this time.

mcvgal · January 2014

RCS here. Since my hopsital only allows 1 other person the room, it will definitely be DH. Last time my sister was with me the entire time until DH arrived, and I am still so thankful for that

bluejeanbaby1217 · January 2014

Just my DH and no one waiting in the waiting room either! I don't want to see anyone until we are moved from l/d to postpartum and even that will depend on what time it is. My mom will bring DS first and then other visitors on a limit basis.

jackieo1309 · January 2014

For right now I just want DH, a doula and our midwife. I know MIL wants to be there (and kind of expects that she will be) but I know that having more people in the room will stress me out. I'll probably tell her that she can come in during early labor but that once I'm really in pain, and definitely during pushing, I want everyone out. I feel bad because I know she wants to help, and she was helpful when my SIL was in labor giving her massages and cleaning her up, but I can see myself getting very annoyed if there are side conversations and extra people around.

hminer4 · January 2014

Only DH (and the midwife, nurses and eventually baby of course). There is no need to have anyone else there especially when pushing. It was hard enough to focus on what the midwife was telling me. I was in such another world I barely remember having DH there even though he was holding my knee and encouraging me the whole time. Our parents both live close by but they never even though about joining us in the delivery room. I think its a very special time for you and your partner to share exclusively.

MrsAMtobe · January 2014

Completely normal thing to want, my husband and I discussed it, but decided to have my mom in the room with us, I'm her only daughter and a big mommas girl and couldn't imagine my mom not being there!

Saritaota614 · January 2014

It will be dh and I only. You're not wrong at all!

lindslalala · January 2014

Totally normal. It was just DH and I last time and will be again this time. It's a moment I wouldn't want to share with anyone other than him.

flmomof4 · January 2014

Just DH and a doula in the room with us. I wouldn't be opposed to having people waiting at the hospital to meet baby, but it won't happen. All of our family is out of state and if my mom happens to be able to fly up right as I start labor she'll be home taking care of DD and can bring her to the hospital once everything is done.

andyandrachel · January 2014

Just DH and the medical professionals. My parents will be in the waiting room and visiting me during labor NOT delivery. My inlaws are weird, they didn't even think of coming to the hospital (they live 5 minutes down the road and were invited) and when DH called them at 1am to say their first grandchild was born, my FIL answered the phone but didn't even tell MIL. Then MIL was upset, when she got on Facebook at 10am that she found out her grandson was born and saw his picture. She tried complaining about it months later over dinner, I told her that she could have seen him minutes after he was born at the hospital like my parents did.

INmommy871278 · January 2014

Just DH. Last time my mom and dad came while I was in labor, my dad slept on the couch and my mom watched tv. Due to high bp u couldn't do anything but lay in bed so didn't really need them there. This time I'm going to insist they stay with DS at our house then once baby is here DH will call and let them know to come on up, that of course is pending what time I actually deliver.

alohababy14 · January 2014

I definitely jugs want DH there. He will have just gotten home from deployment and has/will miss the whole pregnancy, so it's really important to both of us to have that home to just the 2 of us. My parents will be welcome to come a few days later.

rjacques · January 2014

I will only have DH with me like with our first. I figure if you weren't there for the conception, you don't need to be there for the birth!

AutumnBonfire · January 2014

Just DH. With DS, we didn't even have anyone in the waiting room. I was induced because my water broke and I had no time frame to give anyone as to when the baby would be born. I didn't want my parents or his mother driving an hour to the hospital to just sit around all day and night. DS was born at 11:30 at night and everybody just came to visit the next day. It will probably be this way again. I'm assuming my parents will be the ones watching DS now anyway.

CandC13 · January 2014

DH, period. Now how I will tell my mother this is another story

honeybee434 · January 2014

DH and then I think my SIL (his sister) will be there as well. Originally we were going to have just DH and I but after thinking about it, and my SIL letting us know she would love to be there if we wanted her, we decided it would be a good move. My DH is awesome, but he is not one of those people who does well comforting others when they are in stressful situations. I think he will freak out and kind of lock up mentally. So, having SIL will be good for him to give him direction and, and will be good for me because she will make sure I have everything I need.

Fletch82 · January 2014

Just DH. I may allow sister early on but she'll have to leave when it's push time. I want DH and I have some alone time with LO before our families swarm in.

Skeemer · January 2014

DH & my mom.

For some reason my SIL had our MIL in the room with her. Just considering it gives me the total creeps. **shivers**

Skeemer · January 2014

andyandrachel said:

Just DH and the medical professionals. My parents will be in the waiting room and visiting me during labor NOT delivery. My inlaws are weird, they didn't even think of coming to the hospital (they live 5 minutes down the road and were invited) and when DH called them at 1am to say their first grandchild was born, my FIL answered the phone but didn't even tell MIL. Then MIL was upset, when she got on Facebook at 10am that she found out her grandson was born and saw his picture. She tried complaining about it months later over dinner, I told her that she could have seen him minutes after he was born at the hospital like my parents did.

This gave me a headache. *sigh*

I really hate people who act all crazy when *I* have an important moment. People have no concept of "It's not about you right now.". So glad you nipped it in the bud. No one told them not to come to the hospital.

SaranJonathan · January 2014

Just my DH. This time after LO is born I want a few hours. It was not happy that MIL ripped away my DD when she was just an hour old. They can wait until I get to pp. plus this time DD will be the first to meet the new baby.

kimeetee · January 2014

Just DH and medical staff.

For DD's delivery, we had called DH's parents to let them know we were at the hospital, but had emphasized to them that they shouldn't come until we were ready for them. Well, guess who waltzed into the delivery room no less than 10 minutes after delivery. I had my top down and was trying to nurse DD. DH was really upset (because he knew that I was not ready for visitors) and sent them home. Sadly, they had driven 2.5 hours and I felt kind of bad about that. However, I know they won't ever do that again.

This time, though I don't know what the logistics will be like since we will have DD. If we head to the hospital at night, I imagine we'll ask DH's brother or SIL to watch DD while we are at the hospital.

What is everyone/did everyone else do (when you have a little one at home)?

helloblueeyes · January 2014

Just my DH.

My mom has been saying for years, even before i was married, that she wanted to be there "because she's never seen anything born." My mom and i don't get along real well when i'm not trying to push out a watermelon. I have told her time and time again that she will not be there. If she wants to see something be born it will have to be from one of my sisters.

ichamommy · January 2014

I will be asking my aunt to attend the prep classes with me and probably help me push. My SIL and mom both live 2 and 7 hours away so not great candidates. My aunt is the only one who live here in the metro. She's 50 and starting the adoption process so I'm pretty sure she's just chomping at the bit for me to ask her.

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