Have you left baby overnight yet?

BC&LM · December 2013

A thread on the July board got me wondering, have you ladies left your baby with someone else overnight yet? If so, at what age? If not, when do you think you might?

BC&LM · December 2013

We haven't yet. I am not sure at what age we will do it. My mom would love to babysit overnight; she has brought it up already. I totally trust her and everything, but I just don't want to be away from LO for that long yet.

LBeez13 · December 2013

New Year's Eve will be the first time for us. I'm leaving him with my mom but I'm still nervous. He doesn't sttn at all yet.

kanga1622Wed220857 · December 2013

Heck no. The first time I was away from DS1 overnight was when I had a sleep study done when he was almost 2.5. He was in bed before I left and I was home before he woke up. The first time I really was away from him is when I was in the hospital having DS2.

I am a little extreme though. DH and I didn't go on a date without DS1 until he was 18 months.

tttwalters · December 2013

Sometimes when we need a break he will stay with my mom overnight. My lo still gets up a lot and I find the nights are difficult. He is actually going to her tonight as last night was brutal. I know we will all be much happier tomorrow morning.

riansmommie · December 2013

I would totally leave my LO over night already even though he isn't STTN yet, I run into the snag of he is EBF and refuses bottles 100% so until he stops needing to be fed in the MOTN I won't leave him overnight.

ColieAnn31 · December 2013

Put SS. We live with my parents and my mom has taken LO overnight but I was in the house so I don't really count that as leaving him overnight. I have no idea when I plan to leave him overnight but it probably won't be anytime soon.

amberdt03 · December 2013

We let John stay with my IL's Christmas eve. We both had to work so my MIL was going to come and stay the night at our house anyways. Now they want to keep him all the time and if it were up to my husband, they would.

ilovemarfa · December 2013

Nope. Never even left my almost 3 year old overnight either. I don't like being away from them.

BC&LM · December 2013

ilovemarfa said:
Nope. Never even left my almost 3 year old overnight either. I don't like being away from them.

Did you have to leave your 3 yo when you went to the hospital for this LO or did you do a home birth?

sparklemotion86 · December 2013

Nope. I think when she's over a year old, we may get my mom to watch her and DS so that we can hang out with friends for our birthdays. The first time I was away from DS for an overnight, he was just over 11 months. He did fine, but I did miss him.

MrsAery-to-be · December 2013

We have each been gone overnight but the other one was there so not sure that fully counts. We don't have any definite plans to be gone overnight until LO is 10 months old when we go on an anniversary trip for a week but we wouldn't necessarily be against it if it comes up. We only leave the boys with family overnight and they are all a couple hours away so it limits the opportunities.

CoffeeBeanFiend91 · December 2013

When DD was about 2 months I didn't have a choice. I was hospitalized for 7 days and DH was not able to take care of her overnight because he doesn't hear her cry. She was with MIL over night.

GracieL79 · December 2013

We're going to a wedding at the end of April and my parents will be there as well, so he'll stay overnight with my MIL. This is the first time I plan on leaving him overnight.

HeartLikeMine3 · December 2013

We stayed overnight at a hotel for our anniversary when LO was 4 months old. I wasn't ready but DH was pushing for it. I trusted my mom with him at our house completely but I was miserable. Our plan was to sleep in the next morning and have a fancy brunch but I woke up at 5am and packed our stuff and hit the drive thru on the way home. We're supposed to go to a destination wedding at the end of May. LO will be almost 1 year but I haven't decided if I will leave him with my parents or not.

daffy2k · December 2013

riansmommie said:
I would totally leave my LO over night already even though he isn't STTN yet, I run into the snag of he is EBF and refuses bottles 100% so until he stops needing to be fed in the MOTN I won't leave him overnight.

+1 My mom would gladly take M overnight, and I have no qualms about it. But she will not take a bottle at all and so I know that would turn into a disaster

kelly422 · December 2013

Had to go take my boards 4 hours away and they started at 8 am so left LO with DH overnight.

JANCANDANCE · December 2013

Not yet but only bc I haven't had anywhere to go that she could t be with me. But believe me I have no issues leaving her! I just need someplace to go lol.

KellenHi21 · December 2013

Nope, add me to the EBF/refusing bottles group... So I guess not until he's done bf-ing.

PinkPuffyHeart2 · December 2013

hmm, i must be the cling-on mom. I don't ever plan on leaving her overnight anywhere until she starts sleepovers- like middle school? Even then, i would only do it with someone i knew realllllyyyy well and i would push to have her friends sleepover at our house. I don't trust people and I see no need to drop her off with someone else. It would just stress me (and her) out.

lioness13 · December 2013

I would like to leave her to have a night away alone with DH but I am too nervous since she still wakes up once or twice every night.

phishgirl29 · December 2013

We've left him with family for up to 6 hours, but NYE will be the big test. We are leaving the house at 6 and won't come back until 2. It's a long night, but considering that he's terrible at the bottle and prefers boob to anything else, it will be hard on the both of us.

He's going to start daycare soon so he's going to have to get used to it sooner than later.

CindyRelluh · December 2013

Yup! Both my kids have stayed with my parents. Love my kids, but love my breaks.

ilovemarfa · December 2013

BC&LM said:

ilovemarfa said:
Nope. Never even left my almost 3 year old overnight either. I don't like being away from them.
Did you have to leave your 3 yo when you went to the hospital for this LO or did you do a home birth?

Sorry- I did leave him for 1 night with my husband when I delivered. I had a non- medicated vaginal delivery so I was discharged the next morning.

JANCANDANCE · December 2013

I will admit, I am extremely shocked by these answers. @-)

numbersgirl08 · December 2013

Not yet but I'm not opposed to it. She's sleeping through the night well now. Ill probably leave her for the first time sometime in Feb with my husband for a work trip. Then the 2 of us are going on a vacation for my 30th birthday and leaving her with our grandparents (they're splitting the time). I personally don't really understand being ok with someone watching them during the day but not at night (with the exception of the babies that still wake up and nurse or have trouble sleeping at night). I'd be missing out on much less when she's sleeping than during the day when she's awake and interactive.

megandchase · December 2013

I'm about to leave him for 3 nights in a couple of weeks to go on a trip with a girlfriend. He will be with dh and my sister so I'm not worried but I sure am going to miss him and it makes me sad to think how much frozen bm will be used!!

numbersgirl08 · December 2013

ilovemarfa said:

BC&LM said:

ilovemarfa said:
Nope. Never even left my almost 3 year old overnight either. I don't like being away from them.
Did you have to leave your 3 yo when you went to the hospital for this LO or did you do a home birth?

Sorry- I did leave him for 1 night with my husband when I delivered. I had a non- medicated vaginal delivery so I was discharged the next morning.

I'm jealous of your recovery! I had a non medicated vaginal delivery and was not ready to leave after one night.

Greywolf12 · December 2013

We left her for two nights when she was 4 months old. I missed her like crazy, but it was a great bonding time for my parents who came to our house to stay with her and she did great!

numbersgirl08 · December 2013

Clearskies77 said:

JANCANDANCE said:

I will admit, I am extremely shocked by these answers. @-)

Me too but likly not in the way you are, haha

I am surprised so many people are comfortable leaving their baby overnight already. My DH has been away from her for weeks already for work. I am often alone with her but she won't go to bed for anyone else and only wants to breastfeed if she wakes up hungry. Other than if you need to for your profession, I'm surprised many people would choose to already. I am a FTM so maybe I will feel different with later kids? My daughter has transitioned to her crib in her room at this point but I love knowing she's nearby and it just wouldn't work for MTTN feeds if I wasn't there. I also just love getting the cuddles. This baby stage is so short lived. I don't like being away from her for more than a few hrs during the day either though.

I'll caveat at first and say N is STTN, which makes a difference. I guess my thinking is that if she's asleep at night, I'm not missing bonding time or interactive time or cuddle time. Also, I like for her to form some strong bonds with hubby and grandparents and this is one way to do that. I'm sure when I leave her I will miss her, but I think it will be good for everyone. That's just my personality though.

LSquared1024 · December 2013

Prepare to judge a lurker. We have left him for two weekends as well as another overnight. So 5 nights total. He was with my parents every time. EBF, but takes a bottle. He was doing 1-2 MOTN feedings at the time. My mom didnt mind, he goes to bed easily and right back to sleep after feedings. My parents follow my wishes in regards to sleep safety, carseat use and not feeding him anything but the milk i send. He was safe, loved, and happy. My H and I had great trips with friends. (All were planned before i was pregnant). Would do it again in a heartbeat.

numbersgirl08 · December 2013

sctiger said:

PinkPuffyHeart2 said:

hmm, i must be the cling-on mom. I don't ever plan on leaving her overnight anywhere until she starts sleepovers- like middle school? Even then, i would only do it with someone i knew realllllyyyy well and i would push to have her friends sleepover at our house. I don't trust people and I see no need to drop her off with someone else. It would just stress me (and her) out.

@PinkPuffyHeart2

Sleeping over usually starts in elementary school. IMO it's a great way for kids to learn independence. The longer they wait, the harder it will be on them and you. Sleepovers are usually super fun and a really memorable part of childhood, especially for a girl!

Some of my best childhood memories are sleepovers!! I can't wait for N to experience them herself. My parents always made sure they had met or knew the parents of who I was staying with, and I'll probably do the same, but I think it was such a great thing to do. Birthday parties were normally sleep overs and were the best.

KittenGator · December 2013

Nope- DD was almost 4 before we left her overnight. I don't think we'll wait that long this time but it will probably not be too much sooner.

CindyRelluh · December 2013

@jancandance I'm not, lol. I allow my kids independence. To each their own parenting style.

SLaBM2B · December 2013

Yes. We went to AC for a night when he was 5 months. I have no issues with doing it again. I missed him a ton and cried a lot but I too believe it's healthy for him and for me (us).

CindyRelluh · December 2013

Yeah it's hard the first time, but it gets easier, and I find relieves a lot of stress. Plus my parents send me pictures non stop lol!

LSquared1024 · December 2013

I got lots of pictures and updates. I did not cry though.

PinkPuffyHeart2 · December 2013

sctiger said:

PinkPuffyHeart2 said:

hmm, i must be the cling-on mom. I don't ever plan on leaving her overnight anywhere until she starts sleepovers- like middle school? Even then, i would only do it with someone i knew realllllyyyy well and i would push to have her friends sleepover at our house. I don't trust people and I see no need to drop her off with someone else. It would just stress me (and her) out.

@PinkPuffyHeart2

Sleeping over usually starts in elementary school. IMO it's a great way for kids to learn independence. The longer they wait, the harder it will be on them and you. Sleepovers are usually super fun and a really memorable part of childhood, especially for a girl!

I guess everyone is different. I never did sleepovers in elementary school. I did a few in middle school. They were fun but would have been fun at my house too.. (My parents didn't want to though). If my LO never sleeps over at someone else's house, I personally doubt her independence will be hindered. She will have plenty of experience away from me during the day so I see no need for her to stay overnight away. But once she is old enough, I won't stop her if she really wants to do it, as long as I know the parents well.

CindyRelluh · December 2013

Dd had to stay home the four days I was in the hospital, because h brought her to see me once and all she wanted to do was mess stuff up.

PinkPuffyHeart2 · December 2013

Steamboat1679 said:

@pinkpuffyheart2 what if you have another LO? Children usually don't stay in the hospital overnight.

She will be with my husband, in her bed at home.

ETA: My bro-in-law stayed with my sisters 2 older kids overnight when she had her 3rd DD, and i babysat the older 2 during the day, so i imagine we will have a similar set up when we have #2. Not like DH gets up for MOTN care anyway. :P

PinkPuffyHeart2 · December 2013

I'm not saying it is wrong to let your kids do sleepovers or stay the night at grandmas or something, even as little ones, but it's outside of my (and my h's) personal comfort zone, so for us, it won't be happening. To each their own.

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